12A Friday 08.06.12 ‘I love directing but does my art change lives?’ Plan B talks pop culture and politics with Decca Aitkenhead POP GOES FILM! Starring Kylie in Holy Motors Kula Shaker’s Crispian Mills Best and worst singers on screen 08.06.12 The Guardian 3 Lost in Showbiz C lose your eyes for a moment and pretend it’s 1992 again. Your Global Hypercolour T-shirt is forming a perfect thermochromatic triangle between your armpits and your bumcrack. The mixtape on your Walkman is segueing between REM’s Man on the Moon and Ain’t No Doubt by Jimmy Nail. People are predicting big things for Hangin’ With Mr Cooper. And the two biggest stars around are Kevin Costner and Stephen Baldwin. Costner is already king of Hollywood, having released Dances With Wolves, Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves and The Bodyguard in three successive years. And, after showing so much promise in Born on the Fourth of July a few years ago, it seems natural to assume that Baldwin will go the same way. If only Costner and Baldwin would team up on a project , it could be bigger than Steven Seagal and Color Me Badd combined. Better yet, it could save the world. Fast-forward two decades, and they did team up. And it did save the world. And then it all went horribly, horribly wrong. That’s essentially the premise of the court case that began this week , anyway. Baldwin is suing Costner over his investment in something that goes by the nightmarish name of “the Costner solution”. Perhaps a little backstory would help here. After Waterworld became a notorious ﬂ op in 1995, Costner decided to take matters into his own hands. “If my tiresomely hubristic story of a merman who lives on a raft and drinks his own wee can’t convince these people that our oceans are in mortal danger,” he muttered softly at his own reﬂ ection, “I’ll have to do something about it myself.” And so Costner spent the subsequent 15 years working on a centrifuge device that could separate crude oil and seawater . And, because he’s Kevin Costner – a man so freak- ishly untroubled by self-doubt that he chose to end his ﬁ lm The Postman with a crowd of grateful onlookers gazing adoringly at a statue of Kevin Costner – Perhaps they could license the name of the Costner solution to a mad-eyed military despot Baldwin and Costner – the 1990s dream team By Stuart Heritage these centrifuges. However, Baldwin claims that he was somehow tricked into s elling his shares a day before the deal was made, which is why he’s now suing Costner for more than $21m. So far, details of the court case have been scant. It’s been reported that Costner wore khakis to the opening statement this week, while Baldwin “was sweating profusely”. It’s also been reported that the jury swore not to have their decision-making abilities compromised by Costner and Baldwin’s celebrity status; perhaps because members know that if they dwell for too long on the ending of Mr Deeds or the swimming- pool orgy scene from Zebra Lounge, they’ll burst into ﬁ ts of inconsolable tears and have to be escorted from the courtroom. Still, it’s only human to hope for a positive outcome to this case. Perhaps they can both put their ﬁ nancial diﬀ erences aside in the name of ecological progress. And perhaps they can even make a few dollars more by licensing the name the Costner solution to a mad-eyed military despot somewhere. Who knows, they might even get around to making that movie together. If this happens, everyone will be happy. Especially the good, idealistic people of 1992. t h c l a in t de s u be C o s “ b p t h en p o t h te a th po th di ﬀ ec ca b y so so ev to g w i id e these devices came to be known as the Costner solution. But just as he was putting the ﬁ nishing touches to his centrifuge – which presumably included painting a great big picture of his own face on the front and attaching speakers to play tracks from his 2008 country album Untold Truths on a continu ous loop to pacify any oil-soaked seabirds in the vicinity – the BP Gulf of Mexico oil spill hit and demand for the Costner solution rocketed . This is when Baldwin – looking for somewhere to deposit the fortune he’d amassed by playing Barney Rubble in The Flint- stones: Viva Rock Vegas and Sean Linden in Slap Shot 2: Breaking the Ice – became an investor in the Cost- ner solution . At some point after that, BP placed an $18m deposit for 32 of And now, male readers, some advice on the ways of the heart. It has become painfully clear that many women like nothing better than a man with an astoundingly silly name. Take Kate Winslet, for instance. She’s beautiful, radiant and possesses such acting range that she can play both a d rowning aristocrat and a paedophilic Nazi without Want to date above your station, guys? Get a ridiculous name Superstar Stephen Baldwin v Kevin Costner, saviour of the planet – a legal battle that would have put Hollywood in a spin back in 1992 e g d e s o of i n o r l d ey d . y e k , a t → PHOTOGRAPHS REUTERS 4 The Guardian 08.06.12 12 CONTAINS MODERATE HORROR Fans of Marilyn Manson will be thrilled to learn that he has ﬁ nally one-upped the try-hard self-parody of his 2005 wedding to Dita Von Teese – which was reportedly lit by the great- grandchildren of Hitler’s favourite architect and featured, get this, a worst man – with his backstage rider demands . A support act has revealed that Manson will only perform if his dressing room has been painted black and kept at a temperature lower than 10 C, and nobody ever makes eye contact with him. Which, give or take a couple of shades and degrees, more or less makes him the same as Jennifer Lopez. This is great news, especially for anyone desperate to see Manson star in a romcom where he plays a kooky wedding planner who falls for Matthew McConaughey. Stick at it, Marilyn! A few more years like this and you too can appear in a television advert for a Fiat 500 ! You just need to believe! He’s just Marilyn – Marilyn Manson from the block On the web Participate in these important debates guardian.co.uk/lostinshowbiz troubling anybody’s sense of disbelief. And yet, when it came to seeking out a romantic partner, she picked Ned Rocknroll – a man with a name so comprehensively awful that people have to say it with their hands in their pockets, lest they end up involuntarily punching someone in the face during the second syllable. And now the Tatler-friendly marriage of Ben and Kate Goldsmith – the son of James Goldsmith and the daughter of Amschel Rothschild – has also disintegrated . This week, Ben was cautioned for assault after acting like a six-year-old boy and kicking a toy truck at his wife. The reason for this outburst, and the couple’s impending divorce, is believed to be Kate’s growing friendship with a rapper called Jay Electronica. Of course, all break-ups are diﬃ cult, and this is no exception. The root of the split seems to be a slow, sad divergence of lifestyles – his venture capital ﬁ rm means that he must keep basic working hours and she, as a result of her newfound interest in the music industry, is said to be becoming “increasingly nocturnal”. There are children involved in the split, which is never funny. However, there is also a man called Jay Electronica involved, and that couldn’t be any funnier if it drove around in a sputtering little clown car. The moral of this story seems to be that, if you want to woo a woman above your station, you should name yourself after music. Ned Smith wouldn’t get looked at twice, but Ned Rocknroll? That’s sexy. And, while Timothy Thedford is the world’s loneliest man, Jay Electronica ← Lost in Showbiz is a rapper who is irresistible to socialites. You’re going about this all wrong, boys. If you haven’t got a name so humiliating that you can’t say it out loud without blushing or urinating, you don’t stand a chance. There’s only one course of action, and I pray you take it. Yours sincerely, Stu Smoothjazzfusion. Jay Electronica, above, and Marilyn Manson, right Read Marina Hyde on the Olympics, main section, p12 PHOTOGRAPHS FILMMAGIC, REDFERNS 08.06.12 The Guardian 5 ROLE ROCK AND STARS Plan B directing Ill Manors (right); Crispian Mills of Kula Shaker, who has directed his ﬁ rst ﬁ lm, A Fantastic Fear of Everything (below); Kylie Minogue, who has won great acclaim in Holy Motors (bottom) ★ POP GOES FILM ★ Musos moving into movies is not a new trend. Its grisly history is strewn with casualties, paved with hubris and humiliation, bollarded by Madonna and Geri Halliwell (see our guide to the best and worst on p10). But times are a-changing, and those performers who have long protested about pigeonholing have quietly had their wishes granted. The boundaries between ﬁ lm and music are ever more blurred. What was once a trigger for titters is now a viable career move. In this week’s G2 Film&Music we speak to three musicians pitching at the ﬂ icks. What’s odd is that the reception of those ﬁ lms is so hard to judge from their background. Kula Shaker front- man Crispian Mills (p14) has the cinematic ancestry, but appears to have directed a strange movie; Plan B’s directorial debut Ill Manors (p6) got the social commentators ﬁ red up, but left critics unmoved. Meanwhile, Kylie (p12) has been lapping up ﬁ ve-star reviews for her new movie – arthouse curio Holy Motors – at Cannes. At the clos- ing night ceremony, Minogue walked down the red carpet with a Dardenne brother to present the short ﬁ lm award to Turkey’s L Rezan Yesilbas for Sessiz-Be Deng. Now that’s credibility. h istory is b ollarded w ors t o have i shes m o re r ee r i cian s s e front - ears to Ma n o r s o ved. o r her o s- h a 6 The Guardian 08.06.12 I have looked forward to root- canal surgery with greater enthusiasm than I could summon before watching Ill Manors . Few phrases in the English language conjure dread quite like “low-budget gritty social realism” . If you’ve ever had the misfortune to see Kidulthood , you will know what I mean. That was about a month ago, and a day hasn’t passed when I haven’t thought about the ﬁ lm. Social commentators are already talking about its political signiﬁ cance , and reviewing last year’s riots through the prism of its lens. Set on the estate where Ben Drew (the director, who is better known as the rapper Plan B ) grew up in Forest Gate, a bleak scrag-end of east London, the ﬁ lm follows the lives of drug dealers, addicts, prostitutes and teenagers over the course of a few chaotic days. The plotlines grow increasingly frantic, as their lives tangle up in a claustropho- bic maze of tragedy and violence, but the performances are so unbearably real that in places it feels more like documentary than ﬁ ction. We watch the characters make split- second moral calculations to justify amoral choices – she’s only a crack whore, we may as well pimp her; the baby’s only going to end up in a home, we may as well sell it – and see the hideous internal logic of a world that too often looks senseless to outsiders. My partner spent half his life in that world, and found the ﬁ lm so disturbing he was left almost speechless. Only Gary Oldman’s Nil By Mouth has come anywhere as close to evoking a London we all know is out there, but would rather not think about. I meet Drew at the ﬁ lm company’s achingly fashionable oﬃ ces near Notting Hill, where he cuts an in- congruous ﬁ gure among the trendy west London creatives . He stands and moves with the faintly wary, studied self-control of a hard man, his burgundy polo shirt and immacu- late waxed jacket signifying East End geezer, and for a moment I wonder if he’ll be able to lower his guard enough to get us through the interview. So I’m completely unprepared when he starts to talk about his own shame and vulnerability, humiliation and exclu- sion, with an emotional honesty that very rarely ever survives the damage of those traumas. “My house was quite violent and stuﬀ ,” he says . His dad was gone, his mum fell in love with a crackhead, and home life was fairly dysfunctional. “But when I was a kid I used to love drawing, and whenever I’d bring my mum a drawing – and I remember some of the drawings, and they’re fucking shit – she’d just shower me in praise. ‘Wow! It’s amazing! Put it on the fridge.’ And then I would rush through to the living room and do another one, because I wanted that reaction again.” It was about the only positive thing he can remember from his childhood. By 15, he had wound up in a Pupil Referral Unit (PRU) for kids expelled from normal schools. His mum couldn’t aﬀ ord Nike train- ers, so Drew had to wear his big sister’s hand-me-downs. “I used to get picked on for wearing my sister’s Golas , there would be purple or pink in it – you know, girls’ trainers and shit. And there was so much importance put on hav- ing the right trainers by the other kids, ‘THIS IS ME PUTTING MYSELF UP FOR PUBLIC RIDICULE’ PLAN B Interview by Decca Aitkenhead 08.06.12 The Guardian 7 because, actually, it deﬁ ned whether or not you were popular.” As a conse- quence, he wasn’t. “I think, if I’d had the clothes that the other kids had, that I would have been popular. That’s how shallow it was. And yeah, it broke my heart. We went through so much pain, just cos we live in a consumer society. But no one questions it. It’s really weird but it is so important for a kid to have the right clothes. Through not having it, I had to dream about it.” So he began drawing trainers at school, and soon the other kids were copying him, and then they were all designing football strips in class. When he heard some other boys were starting a band, he asked to join, but they said no, so he wrote them a song – but the band promptly fell apart. “They never had one rehearsal, nothing. It was all just talk.” But for Drew: “I imagined my song being a real thing; I could hear it in my head, and that was my imagination running wild.” By then he had begun to realise he was unlike all the kids he knew. “That really makes you feel uncomfortable when you’re a kid; you just want to be like everybody else, you just want to be normal. But I knew in my head I was diﬀ erent; being artistic, having an opinion that diﬀ ers from the majority. Hearing other people talk about some- thing, and going, ‘That ain’t right’, and then saying something, and then they will turn on you.” When he was 16, his friends went on holiday to Ayia Napa, but Drew decided to stay at home and write songs. “Because when they come back from Ayia Napa, what are they going to have? They’re going to have no money, nothing. But I missed out on a lot of bonding – they came back with certain jokes that I hadn’t heard.” The following year they didn’t even bother to invite him, and when they got back everything had changed. “They were all making jokes under their breath, and laughing – I felt like my whole group of mates ‘When you’re a kid, you just want to be normal. But I knew I was diﬀ erent …’ Ben Drew aka Plan B; (above) a scene from his directorial debut, Ill Manors, in which most of the actors are amateurs Portrait for the Guardian by David Levene ★ POP GOES FILM ★ → 8 The Guardian 08.06.12 PHOTOGRAPHS KEVIN MAZUR; FRANCESCA FOLEY were laughing at me. And they were, they were; I’m perceptive, I knew what was going on. Literally, everyone was just cunting me oﬀ . And I thought: ‘Fuck all of you, man. Fuck it. Now I’m focusing on me.’” It was the big turning point in his life. But when he looks back now, he’s glad it happened. “Because if I would have been accepted, I wouldn’t have become so reclusive and obsessed with my work. I would have been sidetracked by all that bullshit.” D rew wanted to be a soul singer, but felt a bit self- conscious singing love songs, so his plan B was to try rapping, hence the stage name Plan B . At 22, he released his ﬁ rst rap album, Who Needs Action When You Got Words , which enjoyed some critical acclaim and did OK com- mercially. By then a lot of his mates were DJs, and he would give them cop- ies of singles to play in the clubs. “And they’re like, ‘Yeah, big tune, big tune,’ but they wouldn’t play it. I’d come to the club and wait all night, and they wouldn’t play it. It was all that kind of shit; just like school. You lot have a gang mentality, and I have to change the way I am to ﬁ t in ? Bollocks.” They would still get together and have a laugh, taking the mickey out of each other, but when one asked him how his single did in the charts, and Drew told them it got to No 35: “They all burst into tears laughing. I just thought, that’s deep – you went so deep there. Because my single only got to 35, I’m a cunt, yeah?” He spits the words out slowly and angrily – before adding philosophically: “They were just kids, innit, and that’s the way it goes. And what I ﬁ nd now is the fact that they’re normal, and the fact that they’re not diﬀ erent like me, actually depresses the fuck out of them . And they want nothing more than to be an individual, and be diﬀ erent, but they can’t. It’s too late.” Drew’s second album, The Defama- tion of Strickland Banks , proved to be the second big turning point. Reverting to plan A, he reinvented himself as a slickly styled soul singer, and struck gold; the ﬁ rst two singles, Stay Too Long and She Said, made the Top 10, the album sold more than half a mil- lion copies, and he won the best male solo artist award at last year’s Brits , along with three Ivor Novellos . All of a sudden Drew was a hot mainstream pop star – but by then he had become obsessed with ﬁ lm. Drew had already written his ﬁ rst script, Trigger, at 21. A studio had wanted to make it with a multi- million pound budget – but, hardly how exactly Drew got it right. “Hon- estly, it’s just honesty. We’re doing a scene, and if someone says something that you wouldn’t say, well, we’re all from that world and everyone would go: ‘We don’t say that.’ It’s just like that, it’s honesty. As soon as something felt forced, I’d just throw the script away.” The trouble for any artist whose success comes from mining a rich autobiographical seam of misery is all too familiar. Exiled by fame and wealth from their source of inspiration, how do they maintain the authenticity on which their success depends? “Do you know what?” agrees Drew. “I was never naive about that. I knew money would change it.” This realisation came in part from going back to his old PRU, which he had visited in order to cast one of the parts. He is now making a BBC documentary about the kids there, and getting them to perform at a Radio 1 concert in Hackney later this month. “ When I go to the school, I feel such a sense of purpose. I see myself in all of them. You see the insecurities straight away, but then you see the strengths as well. I keep telling them: ‘All that shit that went on in your life that has caused you to act and behave in the way that you do – that’s not your fault. Your whole life you’ve been made to think that you’ve done something wrong, and you haven’t. You’re only getting kicked out of school and bullying other kids and shit like that because of what hap- pened to you, which wasn’t your fault.’ There’s a lot of guilt running through them, a lot of guilt. It’s heartbreaking. But I say: ‘ The shit you’re doing now, you have to take responsibility for.’” Going back to his old PRU has really thrown him, Drew admits. “I’m sitting there thinking, does everything else I’m doing mean as much as this? It all comes from the same place, and I love creating things, directing, being artis- tic, yeah. But in terms of: ‘Does my art, in itself, change individual lives like this does, like what I’m doing here?’ I thought, right now, no, I don’t think it does. And actually, should I be a teacher?” He starts to laugh. “A proper weird experience, it was. Should I be a teacher? Should I quit all this music shit, should I just quit it and do this?” If that’s his plan C then, selﬁ shly, I would strongly advise against it. With a new album Ill Manors out next month, Drew is about to appear opposite Ray Winstone in a remake of The Sweeney – he lost two stone for the part: “Cos there was no way anyone would believe a fat bastard like I was at the time could be policeman” – and is also making Trigger, the ﬁ lm he wrote at 21. If this is what he can do at just 28, the thought of what’s to come is quite something. surprisingly, when Drew said he wanted to direct it, they just laughed. So he went oﬀ and made a short ﬁ lm, thinking that would convince them he was up to the job – but instead he ended up expanding the short into Ill Manors and making it himself. With £50,000 of his own money, and £50,000 of funding, he shot most of the movie in just 18 days. I’ve seen enough terrible low- budget directorial debuts to know it must be harder than it looks – and Drew wasn’t even the only novice on set. For the ﬁ lm to be believable, he had ﬁ gured that he would need people who had actually lived the lives they were portraying, so most of the cast are old friends of his, or people he spotted in the street. He even cast his own godfather to play a drug dealer . They deliver astonishing performances, yet most had never even acted before. Did he have to teach them how to do it? “You know this ﬁ lm is going to change their life. So you just say: ‘Listen, your friends are going to watch this ﬁ lm. In 10 years this ﬁ lm will still be here. For the next 10 years you’re going to have two things going on; people coming up to you and going, you were fuck- ing brilliant in that ﬁ lm. Or people will start laughing at you because you were so shit. So what do you want? Because I know you can give me what I need, and this is your opportunity. Fucking do whatever you can from inside yourself, and give me that, or people will watch it and you’ll be that person in the ﬁ lm who’s the weakest fucking link, who ruined the ﬁ lm.” Drew himself acts – he appeared in Adulthood , and in Harry Brown with Michael Caine – and uses the same technique on himself. “This is me putting myself up for public ridicule. And it’s a bigger stage than I ever had at school. So either I fucking smash it, or I embarrass myself.” There are few spectacles more embarrassing than a failed attempt at dark urban realism – but most do fail, often spectacularly, so I want to know Lost My Way, the ﬁ rst single from the new album Ill Manors, is out on Atlantic Records on 2 July. The album is out on 16 July. Read Peter Bradshaw’s ﬁ lm review of Ill Manors, p18 ‘IF I’D BEEN ACCEPTED, I WOULDN’T HAVE BEEN SO OBSESSED WITH MY WORK. I’D HAVE BEEN SIDETRACKED’ ← Drew performing as Plan B, 2010 (above); a scene from Ill Manors (below) ch ange t h y th w ye th in up to yo i n g br il l start la u so shit. S I know y an d th is wh at ev an d gi v it and y wh o’s t ru in ed ap pe a Br ow n e a nd y: s i s e, th an t, but fa ma- to b e ve rtin g f as a ru ck To o o p 10, a mi l- m al e “Dz zling” David Grit en, DailyTelegraph In Cinemas Now Focus Feat es and Indian Paint ush Present an American Emp ical ct e “Moonrise Kingdom” Casting by Douglas Aibel Co-Producers Molly Cooper Lila Yacoub C tume Designer Kasia Walicka Maimone Original Music by Al andre Desplat Music Supervis Randall P ter Edit Andrew Weisblum ,ACE Production Designer Adam Stockhausen D ect of Photography Robert Yeoman ,ASC ecutive Producers Sam Ho man M k Roybal Produced by Wes Anderson Scot Rudin Steven Rales Jeremy Da on Writ en by Wes Anderson & Roman Coppola D ected by Wes Anderson findanyfilm.com/moonrisekingdom “Anderson’s ﬁ nest and funniest since Tenenbaums” ★★★★ Total lm “Sm t, moving and funny” qu e “Loved it from beginning to end" D ed & Confused FROM THE DIRECTOR OF THE ROYAL TENENBAUMS & FANTASTIC MR. FOX ★★★★ The Times ★★★★ Daily Telegraph ★★★★ Emp e ★★★★ Metro ★★★★ Heat ★★★★ Time Out “A Masterpiece” Andy Lea, Daily St Sunday “He t-meltingly perfect” Time Out “Funny and bi ersweet” Emp e ★★★★ The Sun ★★★★ Daily Mail ★★★★ Gu dian 12a Contains moderate s references 10 The Guardian 08.06.12 BEST ▼ The best Will Smith The undisputed king of acting singers, and he can’t even sing. He has played superheroes. He has played Muhammad Ali . He has played a futuristic cowboy who hates giant metal spiders. There’s nothing he can’t do. ▼ Mark Wahlberg He may have his numerous detrac- tors but, given the right director, Wahlberg can be genuinely riveting to watch . Yes, he made The Happen- ing – but, seriously, you try acting opposite wind. ▼ Frank Sinatra When he put the right amount of eﬀ ort in, Sinatra could be a com- pelling screen presence . He even won an Oscar for From Here to Eternity. He also made Cannonball Run II, but shush. ▲ Cher For someone with such an immobile face, Cher has enormous range. She won an Oscar for Moonstruck . She was heart- breaking in Mask. She turned up for work on Burlesque. That’s dedication. ▼ Mariah Carey Naturalistic and unshowy, Mariah Carey was a genuine revela- tion in Precious . Not that anyone has got more than three minutes into Precious with- out wanting to slash their wrists, obviously. Eminem To be fair, he has only really played himself – albeit a mumbling, mono- tone version of himself – in 8 Mile. But playing your- self can be harder than it looks. Exhibit A: Spice World: The Movie. ▼ Bette Midler She has spent the last decade and a half playing identically brassy bitparts in terrible ﬁ lms, but Midler had real power once . Admittedly only in other terrible ﬁ lms, but beggars can’t be choosers. t in g he p en - us ly , ▼ Jennifer Hudson Nobody could have guessed that an American Idol reject would win an Oscar for her raw performance in Dreamgirls . Or, admittedly, follow it up with a disappointing bitpart in the Sex and the City ﬁ lm. ▼ Sting Calling Sting a more toler- able actor than singer sounds like a backhanded compliment. It is. Watch Brimstone & Treacle and you can almost forgive him for Shape of my Heart. Almost. Justin Timberlake Timberlake’s deter- mination to be an actor rather than a singer hasn’t paid oﬀ yet, but he’s sticking with it . Hopefully he will come good soon. k e er - n a d Pop singers love to try their hand at movie acting, but some of them really shouldn’t have … Stuart Heritage rounds up the hits and misses 08.06.12 The Guardian 11 WORST ▼ Prince Prince can compose, perform, produce, sing and dance like nobody else on earth. He can also act like nobody else on earth . Because everyone else on earth is better at it than him. ▲ Michael Jackson In Moonwalker, Michael Jackson played himself . Not a version of himself. He actually played himself, but with all the panache of a regional Michael Jackson lookalike competition bronze medal winner. Let us call this the Spice World eﬀ ect. ▼ Madonna Madonna’s famous tenacity has got her to plenty of places in her career but, every time she decides to act, that place tends to be the bargain bin . ▲50 Cent Like Eminem, 50 Cent essentially played himself in Get Rich or Die Tryin ’. Unlike Eminem, he then made lots of direct-to-DVD ﬁ ller that people only watch out of self-loathing. ▲ Britney Spears It’s easy to pick on Britney Spears for starring in Cross- roads , but that’s because watching Crossroads was like performing dental surgery on yourself with a tinfoil drill. Her place here is well deserved. ▲ Pete Doherty Doherty’s debut acting turn along- side Charlotte Gainsbourg in Confession of a Child of the Century was labelled as “shambling amateurism” by the Guardian’s Catherine Shoard. And that was her being nice. ▼ Roger Daltrey Old rock stars have the choice of buying a trout farm or starring in ill-advised Chesney Hawkes ﬁ lms and the Highlander TV series. Roger Daltrey did both. Greedy. ▼ Geri Halliwell One scene in an episode of Sex and the City . A cameo in Crank: High Voltage. Fat Slags. That’s all of Geri Halliwell’s acting career. Oh, and she was in Spice World. I rest my case. ▼Rihanna Admittedly Rihanna wasn’t given an awful lot to do in Battle- ship, but she still failed hopelessly at it. Your mum, given the chance, could grunt at a Transformer more convincingly. The worst Jessica Simpson Once, people said Jessica Simpson could be a viable acting proposition. Then people saw Jessica Simpson act . And now nobody says that any more. ▲ I M p N o a h a a J c m u S Tryin ’.Unlike Eminem , h e t h en ma de lo ts o f d i re ct -t o- DVD ﬁ ller that pe op le onl y watch out o f f sel f -loathing . n C o n f e ss i o n f a Child of h e Centu ry wa s la b elle d s s h am bl in g m ateurism b y h e Guar d ian’ s a t h erine S h oar d . n d that wa s her e ing nice . PHOTOGRAPH ALLSTAR, REDFERNS, PARAMOUNT ★ POP GOES FILM ★ 12 The Guardian 08.06.12 I'VE GOT A LOT TO DO TO STOP PEOPLE THINKING, ‘WHY'S KYLIE IN A FILM?' She has a dubious back catalogue when it comes to movies, but with Holy Motors the talk of Cannes, has Kylie Minogue's gamble paid oﬀ ? She talks to Xan Brooks W hen Kylie Minogue alights at the Cannes round table, the guests rise up and block her from view. Everyone has their hand outstretched, clamouring for an introduction. This journalist is from Portugal and that one’s from Tasmania. “Wow!” exclaims Kylie as each country is namechecked. They’ll eat her up, they love her so. Hello Kylie, I’m from London. “Wow!” says Kylie, beaming excitedly into my face as though I’ve told her I’m magic. The singer is in Cannes to attend the grand unveiling of Holy Motors , a ﬁ lm that erupts in the main competition like some gaudy ﬁ rework display, spooking the dignitaries and splitting the critics. Some say, “Wow!" And some say, “Wah!”, though neither camp can pin it down. Leos Carax’s picture is ﬂ amboyant and preposterous; completely joyous and wholly unclassiﬁ able. Denis Lavant plays a chameleonic actor on assignment, ferried a round Paris in a white limousine and changing en route from beggar-woman to satyr to assassin to victim. Minogue crops up late as a tragic, trenchcoated femme fatale, singing a torch song inside the derelict Samaritaine department store. At night, in the garage, the limousines start talking to each other. Kylie shakes her head in wonderment. “I need to see it again in order to form an opinion of what it all means?” she says, her bright uplift turning statements into questions. “I’m still ﬂ abbergasted. I mean, it’s over- whelmingly beautiful? And it’s not depressing, even though there’s a lot of darkness in there, too. It’s got talking cars? It’s hilarious.” She explains that she was introduced to Carax by a mutual friend, the French director Claire Denis. She ﬁ rst hit it oﬀ with Denis when they met at the hairdresser (“basically, life revolves around the hair salon”). Carax, for his part, had barely heard of her and this was a bonus. It meant that she could come to the role fresh, with no baggage . “I wanted to take away all the things that have become second nature to me whenever I see a camera. I’ve been doing what I do for a long time. Normally it involves being that person – that ‘Kylie’. This time I was able to go back to being 11 or 12 again, working on a set and being part of the gang. Blank page, open book.” There’s a lot of history to blithely erase. By the time she hit her teens, Minogue was already a mainstay of Australian TV, eventually graduating to the role of feisty, dungaree-clad Charlene in Neighbours, and from there to worldwide pop stardom. She blitzed the airwaves with I Should Be So Lucky and Especially for You, then bounced towards maturity via Better the Devil You Know and the infernally ne it h er cam p can p in it down. Ca rax’s picture is ﬂ amboyant a p re p osterous; com pl ete ly jo yo an d w h oll y unclassi ﬁ able. De n La vant plays a chameleonic a ct on assignment, f erried a round in a w h ite limousine and c h an g en route from be gg ar-woman t to assass i n to v i ct i m. M i nogu e u p late as a tra g ic, trenc h coate fa tale, sin g in g a torch son g ins i de re l ict Samaritaine de p artm e At ni gh t, in t h e g ara g e, t h e l im start talkin g to each othe r. Ky lie s h akes h er h ea d w on derment. “I ne ed i t a g ain in order to a n o p inion o f w h m eans?” s h e sa y br i g ht uplift tu s t a tement s i n questions. ﬂ abberg a mean, i wh el m be au An d e ev th th of d in t h too. I t t al ki ng It ’s hil ar Sh e ex th at she w introduce d by a mutual the Fren ch d ir Cl ai re Denis. She ﬁ rst h with Denis when they the hairdresser (“basi c life revolves aroun d th salon”). Carax, for his p ba rely heard of her an d a b onus. It meant that s come to the role fre sh , w ba ggage . “I wanted to t a the things that have bec o na tu re to me whenever I camera. I’ve been doing w a long time. Normally it i nv that person – that ‘Kylie’. T h I was able to go back to bei n ag ain, working on a set an d of the gang. Blank page, o p There’s a lot of history t o er ase. By the time she hit h Mi nogue was already a ma i Au stralian TV, eventually g to the role of feisty, dunga r C harlene in Neighbours, a n th ere to worldwide pop s ta b bl it zed the airwaves with I So Lucky and Especia ll y f o b bo unced towards maturi ty th e Devil You Knowa nd t h ★ POP GOES FILM ★ 08.06.12 The Guardian 13 catchy Can’t Get You Out of My Head. Her success has been mem orialised with a bronze statue on the Melbourne waterfront and a quartet of waxworks at Madame Tussaud s. But who knows? It may also come at the expense of an acting career that seemed to get smothered while still in its infancy. “I’d deﬁ nitely love to do more acting,” she says today. “My heart cries out for it; it’s such a deep longing. For years I’ve been waiting to get back into it and it just hasn’t happened. Or, it has happened and it was so disastrous that I thought: ‘Oh, it’s just not for me.'” Reviewing her role in The Delinquents, for instance, the Mirror sniﬀ ed that she had “as much acting charisma as cold porridge”, while a co-star slot (opposite Jean-Claude Van Damme) in Street Fighter prompted the Washington Post to dub her “the worst actress in the English-speaking world” . Putting aside her playful turn as the Green Fairy in Moulin Rouge!, her screen credits have not been pretty. On paper, Holy Motors could easily have been another calamity . Instead, it winds up as the talk of this year’s festival ; the most audacious ﬁ lm in competition, for all its wild detours and screeching ﬂ ights of fancy. So Minogue took a gamble and it paid oﬀ . “I’ve got a lot of work to do before people stop thinking: ‘Oh, what’s Kylie Minogue doing in a ﬁ lm?’” she admits. “But this has made me feel it’s possible to do something beautiful and challenging, and to be believable as someone else.” I f Holy Motors is about anything, it’s about the roles that we play, the lives we inhabit and the way in which these performances can make one feel that they are living a lie. This must be something Minogue has experienced in her own life. “Oh, absolutely . Totally. For 25 years I’ve been putting those inverted commas around Kylie.” She sips at her water. “It’s a weird thing, the world we live in now, where everyone has a cameraphone. There’s a line in the ﬁ lm: ‘Cameras used to be bigger than us and now we can’t even see them .’ When I started, there was something almost romantic about the notion of paparazzi. I mean, it wasn’t. They were still chasing you down the road. But that guy had to put ﬁ lm in his camera and work out whether it was worth pressing the button to take the shot, otherwise he’s got to stop and change the ﬁ lm. So it was like this age of innocence . Whereas now, the cameras are everywhere. So if I’m at home in sweatpants, looking like a total dag, and I step outside?” A shake of the head. “You don’t even know where the cameras are any more.” And yet, this being Kylie, she would rather look on the bright side. A moment later she’s oﬀ again, enthusing about shooting in Paris and being in Cannes; marvelling at the pure, happy accident of ﬁ nding her way into this oddball, surreal picture that has everyone so excited. “I think I’m having a full out-of-body experience at the moment,” she marvels. “When I get back to London, I’ll need to see a picture of myself to prove I was here.” Audience complete, the guests again rise up to swamp her. They want her to wait a moment, stand still for a second, while they huddle in and take their photos. Every phone is a camera; there will be proof she was here. “Wow!” exclaims Kylie, posing gamely in the sunshine as the pictures are snapped. “Wow!” The inverted commas are back in place. ‘For 25 years, I've been putting inverted commas around Kylie' Wholly unclassiﬁ able … Denis Lavant and Kylie Minogue in Holy Motors Live opera Watch a new production of The Cunning Little Vixen live from Glyndebourne on Sunday guardian.co.uk/music Holy Motors in released on 28 September. 14 The Guardian 08.06.12 I n an ideal world, Simon Pegg would physically assault his audience. “People need to be poked in the face,” he announces, gripped suddenly by a passion so intense it causes him to surface from the fog of jetlag and shove aside his walnut and avocado salad . (He only recently returned to the UK from shooting Star Trek 2 in Los Angeles, and admits to needing help with key nouns and adjectives.) “Maybe not a poke in the face,” he continues after a second’s thought. “But the ribs, at least. I like the idea of confounding audiences to a degree, challenging their expectations. We are given what we expect so much now. There’s this desperate fear of upset- ting anyone. All we get in the cinema are 3D ﬁ reworks displays. But interaction is more important than passive watching; that’s just a waste of the art form. My attitude goes back to Howard Barker’s book Arguments for a Theatre , and his insistence that it should be painful and awkward and diﬃ cult for the audience.” Painful and awkward and diﬃ cult: not words that the distributor of Pegg’s new ﬁ lm will be in any hurry to splash over the poster. But it is this movie, the horror-comedy A Fantastic Fear of Everything , that has led us on to the subject of wrongfooting the average ‘MUSICIANS THROW TVS. ACTORS JUST DISAPPEAR’ Simon Pegg and Kula Shaker frontman Crispian Mills tell Ryan Gilbey how they came to make a comedy- horror ﬁ lm set in a launderette punter. Pegg plays Jack, a neurotic writer whose heebie-jeebies get the better of him after he researches a book about serial killers. This is Pegg’s 1408 , his Cast Away : for the majority of the running time, he is on screen alone, at least until Jack is driven to the brink of a breakdown by visiting the one place that is the nexus for all his fears: the local launderette. I admit to Pegg that silent baﬄ e- ment was the predominant reaction at the screening I attended, which is what has led us on to a discussion of audi- ence expectations. And who better to help us out on the subject than Crisp- ian Mills , for whom A Fantastic Fear of Everything marks his ﬁ lm-making de- but . “I’ve watched it with audiences,” says the 39-year-old Mills, who co-di- rected the movie with the pop-promo wizard Chris Hopewell. “There is deﬁ - nitely that moment of bewilderment in the room when the audience realises that the main action really is going to be played out entirely in the launder- ette. A friend of mine said at one of the test screenings that the ﬁ lm is like shock therapy: you can’t anticipate how people are going to react.” Mills has joined Pegg and myself in the quiet corner of a Soho members’ club; he is slightly late and wearing a Crispian Mills in his Kula Shaker heyday, 1999; (above) Pegg and Mills in conversation ★ POP GOES FILM ★ 08.06.12 The Guardian 15 PHOTOGRAPH LINDA NYLIND FOR THE GUARDIAN faded T-shirt, as is the prerogative of any rock star, current or former. Let’s get the formalities out of the way: yes, he is that Crispian Mills, frontman and l inchpin of the psychedelic Britpop outﬁ t Kula Shaker , best known for hits such as Tattva , Hey Dude and Grateful When You’re Dead but most deﬁ nitely not Deutschland Über Alles. The Cris- pian-Mills-thinks-the-Nazis-were-mis- understood story, which helped kill oﬀ the band’s ﬁ rst ﬂ ourish in the late 90s, has long since been explained away as a combination of fame-induced pop-star hubris and media hysteria. It’s not such a surprise that Mills should branch into ﬁ lm-making given the cinematic stock from which he is descended. His grandfather was Sir John Mills , and he is the son of a genuine Brit-cinema power couple from the days before that phrase was coined – his mother is the luminous Hayley Mills , his father the late writer- producer-director Roy Boulting (of the Boulting Brothers ). Mills always said that as a child he assumed he would end up making ﬁ lms. What took him so long? “When I was younger, I didn’t give it too much thought. I just knew that was what everyone else did in my house, and they all got to show oﬀ about it at Christmas when they were playing charades, so I would do that eventually too. But I fell in love with music and became completely immersed in that world. It wasn’t until I was 27 or 28 that I realised how obsessed I was with ﬁ lm.” The catalyst was twofold. First, Kula Shaker disbanded after a brace of albums (though they recorded again after reforming in 2004 ). Then Mills read Easy Riders, Raging Bulls , Peter Biskind’s celebration of the excesses of the American new wave. “I felt such a connection with that world,” he says. “I understood what that struggle was like, having heard so much about it from my family. Even someone like Dickie Attenborough , whom I’d grown up around – you think of him as the establishment, but he’s ﬁ ercely inde- pendent. People like him and Bryan Forbes were very much masters of their own destiny. Those ﬁ ghts continue.” His parents met on The Family Way , but it is their collaboration on the sinewy thriller Twisted Nerve that is perhaps more pertinent to Mills’s direc- torial debut; even as it is prodding us toward laughter, A Fantastic Fear still tries to make our skin crawl. “Horror and comedy overlap so often because they both elicit an immediate emo- tional response,” says Pegg, who has form in this hybrid genre, with Shaun of the Dead and Steve Coogan’s mock- Hammer series Dr Terrible’s House of ‘Laughter is a fear response. It makes horror and comedy bedfellows’ Horrible on his CV. “Ghost stories and jokes have the same structure: setup and pay-oﬀ . Except that one provokes fear, the other laughter. Laughter is a fear response anyway; it’s about trying to make sense of irregularities in our reality. It’s what makes horror and com- edy such obvious bedfellows.” In its structure, which has Jack expe- riencing psychological breakthroughs that help him to face his demons, the movie sometimes resembles a psycho- analytic teaching aid. It’s clearly a ﬁ lm made by someone who has undergone a lot of therapy, isn’t it? “Well, they do say you’ve got to write about what you know,” laughs Mills. By his own account, he rather lost his way in the rush of fame and approba- tion that dominated his early 20s. “The younger you are, the more diﬃ cult it is not to let it get to you,” he says sagely. “Even if you know it’s all bullshit. You become the centre of other people’s universes as well as your own, which isn’t healthy. When you → Today on the film and music podcasts: Will Quentin Tarantino be a slave to the dialogue on his new ﬁ lm Django Unchained? guardian.co.uk/ film 16 The Guardian 08.06.12 reach America, English bands in particular take the piss – you’re just treated so well, you can’t believe it. And it does get to you.” He pauses and looks me hard in the eye. “It really does get to you.” Pegg has seen something compa- rable happen in the ﬁ lm industry. “It probably occurs with actors a little less. It’s something that is expected of musicians, you know, the TV out of the window. With actors it manifests itself as disappearing into the trailer for hours at a time. I’m 42 now, I’m not some youngster believing my own hype, and I always enjoy working on a set where everyone’s happy. I couldn’t walk on set two hours late having refused to come out Stadium rock Three Lions? World in Motion? I’m Forever Blowing Bubbles? Vote for your favourite in our European championship of football songs guardian.co.uk/music of my trailer, and feel the grips looking at me thinking: ‘Who’s that arsehole?’ I’m not OK with that, but I can see how it happens.” Mills is nodding em- phatically. “You become a cunt. And if you’re lucky, the other guys in the band will look out for you and tell you that you’re being a total cunt.” Next up for Pegg is the sci -ﬁ comedy The World’s End – his long-awaited third movie with the writer-director Edgar Wright, with whom he has done his ﬁ zziest, funniest work, from the Channel 4 series Spaced through to Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz . They’re currently corresponding with the BBFC over how many times they can use the c-word in The World’s End without forfeiting a 15 certiﬁ cate. “The BBFC wrote us a lovely letter back,” says Pegg cheer- fully, “and let us know we could say it once, aggressively, toward a woman, but ﬁ ve times in casual conversation.” Mills, on the other hand, doesn’t seem ready yet to move on from A Fantastic Fear, and what it means to be releasing it at last into the world. “It’s only now I realise what a massive invasion of privacy it is to put out something so deeply personal. This is a story about a guy who hates himself, after all. The way Simon plays it is very funny, but it’s all there: the self- loathing of the drama queen.” ← A Fantastic Fear of Everything goes on general release today. Read Xan Brooks’s review, p21. mp a- r y. “It tt le c te d V out o f n i f es ts r ailer f or m not w n ng y. s t ph if y ba n th a N T he th ir Ed g hi s Ch Sh Th w ti T Amara Karan in A Fantastic Fear of Everything 08.06.12 The Guardian 17 Reviews Film Pop Jazz Classical Games Television Ebolo Bell’a Njoh Killer Cameroonian funk, taken from a new Sofrito compilation on the Strut label of raw danceﬂ oor rhythms from global hotspots. Mutt Romney Blues Ry Cooder A taste of a new album, titled Election Blues, and proof that it’s not just Springsteen among the old-timers with an itch to scratch. The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face The Flaming Lips feat. Erykah Badu Cover version with a NSFW video that has upset Badu – but check it for some classic Lips bombast. Ass Pop Balam Acab A hip-hop ﬂ avoured track from the bedroom-based witch house producer which makes “ass pop” our new favourite genre. Walk Through Walls Kyla La Grange Epic opening cut from the Cambridge graduate’s upcoming debut album (who headlines a Guardian New Band of the Day gig next week). The F&M Playlist Ambitious collision of inﬂ uences: Totally Enormous Extinct Dinosaurs’ Trouble, page 24 DEAD CLEVER The Pact Page 20 Th e 18 The Guardian 08.06.12 Reviews Film By Peter Bradshaw Ill Manors ★★★★★ Dir: Ben Drew. With: Riz Ahmed, Natalie Press, Ed Skrein, Anouska Mond. 121min. Cert: 18 Ill Manors is a multi-stranded urban crime drama set in east London, the debut feature ﬁ lm from Ben Drew, otherwise known as singer-songwriter Plan B, and developed from his widely hailed song of the same name, all about the 2011 summer riots. The ﬁ rst half-hour of this movie is great: chaotic, inventive, energetic. But after this, the dynamism worryingly leaks out of the ﬁ lm; it turns out to be disappointingly and determinedly apolitical, while the lairy characters and situations look increasingly forced, derivative and unconvincing . By the time Natalie Press turns up, playing a woman forced to work as a prostitute by a sex-traﬃ ck- ing gang, the ﬁ lm has turned into a geezery Brit-Pulp Fiction knockoﬀ . Riz Ahmed – so great in Chris Morris’s Four Lions and Eran Creevy’s Shifty – is at the centre of ﬁ lm, playing a troubled guy called Aaron, but his character is baﬄ ingly ﬂ at and dull, and the ﬁ lm’s ﬁ - nale is wildly sentimental. But the opening has power and ﬂ air. It begins with a great rush of energy and a swirl of images from cinema- tographer Gary Shaw, and a musical track that subtly and rather hauntingly remixes Saint-Saëns’s Carnival of the Animals. Using a mix of professional and non-professional actors, Drew sets out to dramatise the despair of those with no prospects other than selling drugs, with no sense of community or identity, which manifests itself partly in a neurotic obsession with their mobile phones, of which they have large numbers, all on pay-as-you-go so that they can’t be traced by “the feds”. It is all about dysfunction, humilia- tion and losing face. Pre-teen Jake (Ryan de la Cruz Indiana) tries to buy drugs with £20 that his mate has stolen from his mum; dealer Marcel (Nick Sagar) takes the money but won’t give him the drugs until Jake actually hits the friend who gave him the cash. Having bought acceptance with shame, Jake gets out of his depth in gang culture, and Marcel himself is humili- ated by ageing dealer and ex-con Kirby (Keith Coggins), forced to strip naked in the street at gunpoint – and Kirby is himself humiliated by his former protegé Chris (Lee Allen). Meanwhile, hard man Ed (Ed Skrein) terrorises crack-addicted Michelle (Anouska Mond) into having sex with a series of sleazy guys: a truly horrible sequence. With all this, Drew shows how it’s all about male pride and male fear. There are some strong moments. John Cooper Clarke has a great choric cameo with a poem entitled Pity the Plight of Young Fellows. He ﬂ oats into view almost surreally, a wraith, a ghost, reciting his work in one corner of a deeply sinister drinking establishment that looks as if it should be featured every week on the Sky TV programme Britain’s Toughest Pubs. With his black suit, shock of black hair, and behind his enigmatic dark glasses, Clarke almost looks like a post-punk version of TS Eliot’s blind Tiresias, foresuﬀ ering all the violence and gangland despair happening heedlessly in front of him. It’s a pleasure to see him, and he is smartly used by Drew, although his humour and maturity is missing from the rest of ﬁ lm. With Britain currently euphoric about the Jubilee and the Olympics, and indulging in an orgy of red-white- and-blue, this would certainly be the moment for Drew to puncture the com- placency, and talk again about some- thing that the oﬃ cialdom is so strenu- ously trying to forget: the riots. His original track was praised for saying something powerful and committed about the disorder. Frankly, the ﬁ lm doesn’t; or at least only very cautiously and indirectly, in the sense that it shows the poverty, alienation and despair that arguably created the conditions for violence. Some TV footage at the very beginning alludes to the riots, and a melodramatic moment at the end may be a ﬁ ctional transformation of one famous news photo. There are the now mandatory shots of Olympic Park and the Olympic Stadium: scenes which are in danger of becoming as cliched in London ﬁ lms as shots of the Gherkin building were a decade ago. These knowing images are being worked pretty hard, and the movie runs out of steam after about half an hour, a kind of extended pop video. Really, Ill Manors looks like many other British urban crime ﬁ lms; it could have been made at almost any time, and there’s not much substance under the urban style. Plan B’s London riots- inspired directorial debut misses out on the opportunity to make a political statement Concrete bungle … Kate Williams’s History of the Smile on Radio 4 THIS WEEK PETER ENJOYED … Humiliation … Keith Coggins and Nick Sagar in Ill Manors a w 08.06.12 The Guardian 19 A new documentary has everything you always wanted to know about Woody – but is afraid to ask about just one thing, writes Peter Bradshaw The sweet lowdown Woody Allen: A Documentary ★★★★★ Dir: Robert Weide. With: Woody Allen, Penelope Cruz, Sean Penn, Martin Scorsese, Larry David. 113min. Cert: 15 This is the cinema-release version of a PBS documentary which originally ran at over three hours: an intimate, aﬀ ectionate and warmly celebratory study of the great comedian and ﬁ lm- maker Woody Allen, directed by Robert B Weide, a documentary-maker who has also directed Larry David’s Curb Your Enthusiasm. It has fascinating behind-the-scenes footage of Allen directing on location, in the studio, working in the edit suite, and also glorious material on Allen’s boyhood and early life that is as compelling as a Philip Roth novel. I watched this engaging ﬁ lm with a great big smile on my face. I don’t think anyone with any love for Allen, or the cinema, could fail to do anything else. To see him scribbling scripts on his yellow legal pads or hammering them out on a typewriter that he has had since a teenager is almost awe-inspiring. There can’t be a life story in postwar American cinema more inspiring than his: the comic genius who started out as a gag-writer for the newspapers, then a standup, and then a ﬁ lm-maker who insisted on auteur prerogative without ever needing to use the word, and who became an evangelist for the masters of European cinema. Having said all this, Weide shows a loss of nerve in declining to engage much with the great Soon-Yi scandal, the awful moment in 1992 when Woody Allen was found to be having an aﬀ air with the adopted daughter of his partner Mia Farrow; a sensation that caused a karmic trauma after which, it could be said, his work lost ground. The aﬀ air could explain his ceaseless industry and return to undemanding comedy; but Weide does not care to discuss these issues. Soon-Yi is discussed very gingerly, cursorily; there’s a montage of the tabloid front pages, and Allen blandly says that people are entitled to what- ever opinion they like. Really, the question is given a pretty wide berth. Is it the elephant in the living room? Well, Woody Allen may have fallen in love with the wrong woman, but the relationship seems to have been entirely stable since then. Maybe there’s no more to be said. Part of the pleasure of the ﬁ lm is seeing those people who have been legendary names on the credits of movies we have grown up with, people like Jack Rollins, who with the late Charles H Joﬀ e (shown in archive footage) was Woody Allen’s manager and then executive producer from the earliest days. Letty Aronson, Allen’s sister and his producer from the early 90s, is also interviewed. This documentary is a pleasure, though we don’t get too far beneath the surface. Prometheus Ridley Scott’s return to the Alien universe is muddled but essential The Angels’ Share Ken Loach’s whisky heist is his most relaxed oﬀ ering in years The Turin Horse Béla Tarr’s ﬁ nal ﬁ lm is a bleakly brilliant vision of the end of days Moonrise Kingdom Wes Anderson is back on form with this 60s-set teen romance STILL SHOWING 20 The Guardian 08.06.12 Reviews Film Arirang ★★★★★ Dir: Kim Ki-duk. With: Kim Ki-duk. 100min. Cert: 15 This startling, fascinating and bizarre ﬁ lm (right) is in some ways the strangest arthouse event of the year. At last year’s Cannes ﬁ lm festival, the jury of which I was a member gave it the joint top prize in the Un Certain Regard section. It’s bound to exasperate and indeed infuriate as many people as it enthralls. Kim Ki-duk is the South Korean director renowned for his extreme and challenging movies such as 2001’s Bad Guy and 3-Iron, from 2004; his best ﬁ lm is probably the 2003 haunting parable Spring, Summer, Autumn, Winter … and Spring. Kim was said to be deeply shaken by a near- fatal accident on the set of his 2008 ﬁ lm Dream in which his lead actress was apparently almost killed. He suﬀ ered a form of breakdown, which in this extremely weird semi- documentary he now re-enacts. We see him all on his own, brooding, remembering, sobbing. There are long scenes in which he does nothing but watch his own movies – we see them, too, on a fuzzy TV screen – while the director becomes emotional. Arirang is the title of a Korean folksong that Kim himself sings in a strained, cracked voice. It is the most extravagantly self- indulgent piece of pure loopiness imaginable – but gripping as well. A piece of experimentalism at odds with convention. PB The Harsh Light of Day ★★★★★ Director: Oliver S Milburn. With: Dan Richardson, Giles Alderson, Sophie Linﬁ eld. 90min. Cert: 18 In a fug of late-night viewing and genre fandom, this lo-ﬁ British vampire ﬂ ick might slip down fairly easily. But viewed beneath an everyday bulb, The Harsh Light of Day seems a touch too duﬄ y acted and iﬃ ly scripted to be really recommendable. An author in the occult staying in an ominously remote cottage suﬀ ers an attack that leaves his wife (personality trait: up for it) dead and him in a wheelchair. The police are hopeless, so he does the only sensible thing and makes a pact with Satan to try and exact revenge. Snappy editing helps sustain some pace, and Giles Alderson has charisma as the mysterious “Infurnari”, but after a spell the interest sag is unstaunchable. Catherine Shoard The Pact ★★★★★ Dir: Nicholas McCarthy. With: Caity Lotz, Casper van Dien. 89min. Cert: 15 Nicholas McCarthy’s The Pact is a horror ﬁ lm developed from a short, and unfortunately it splits apart while being stretched out to feature length. There are some very neat little scary moments, but the whole thing fails to hang together and the plot is muddled. Caity Lotz plays Annie, a young woman and recovering drug addict with some biker-chick attitude who is struggling to come to terms with her mother’s death, and with being back in the family home in which so many unhappy and traumatising things happened. Soon, she senses that the place is impregnated with a spirit of evil. The “Skype” scene at the very beginning delivers a short, sharp shock, and McCarthy takes the time- honoured scary-movie trope of seeing something creepy in a photograph and From Plan B to Wood A On this week’s Guardian ﬁ lm video review show, Peter Bradshaw, Henry Barnes and Catherine Shoard check into Ill Manors (below), hammer away at Woody Allen: A Documentary and answer the call of Arirang guardian.co.uk /film 08.06.12 The Guardian 21 Casa de Mi Padre ★★★★★ Dir: Matt Piedmont. With: Will Ferrell, Diego Luna, Gael García Bernal. 84min. Cert: 15 Will Ferrell plays humble ranchero Armando whose simple, sweet nature is ridiculed by his landowning father and successful businessman brother, Raul (Diego Luna). When Raul returns to the ranch with a gorgeous bride to be, hearts ﬂ utter and forbidden romance blossoms against the backdrop of a war between DEA and drug runners. Casa is a spoof of soapy telenovelas, poverty-row westerns and over-the- border B-movies. Painted backdrops, reused rear-projection footage and intentionally bad continuity are thrown in, though never as sharp or dense as in the superior spoofery of, say, Black Dynamite. Ferrell couldn’t look less Mexican if he tried, a decent if well-worn gag, and the dialogue is all in Spanish, subtitled but hardly needed. It’s all a Red Tails ★★★★★ Dir: Anthony Hemingway. With: David Oyelowo, Cuba Gooding Jr, Terrence Howard. 125min. 12A The true story of the Tuskegee Airmen, a squadron of African- American second world war ﬂ y- ing aces, is one of those amazing tales that you just couldn’t make up. Unfortunately, this George Lucas-produced retelling plays like A Fantastic Fear of Everything ★★★★★ Dirs: Crispian Mills, Chris Hopewell. With: Simon Pegg, Alan Drake, Amara Karan. 100min. Cert: 15 Hold on to your comfort blanket and have the cloves of garlic handy: Crispian Mills’s London-based horror- comedy is so spectacularly bungled that it leaves the viewer in a state of advanced petriﬁ cation. Simon Pegg says “Arrrgh!” and “Ooh!” as the phobic mystery writer who must overcome his terror of laundrettes ahead of a make- or-break meeting with a Hollywood mogul. But there’s a bomb wired to the washing machine and a psychopath in the cellar. “Remember,” smirks the villain. “When the rinse cycle ends, you’re dead.” How about skipping some stages, or setting the dial to speed-wash? Anything, anything to put us out of our misery. Xan Brooks brings it bang up to date in the era of Google Street View. McCarthy has a talent to unsettle – still not entirely developed. PB The Innkeepers ★★★★★ Dir: Ti West. With: Sara Paxton, Pat Healy, Kelly McGillis. 101min. Cert: 15 Three years ago, horror director Ti West made The House of the Devil, a movie which, frustratingly, failed to deliver on its promise; and the same thing happens with his new ﬁ lm, a single-location haunted-hotel ﬁ lm that is baﬄ ingly bland and unatmospheric. In narrative terms, it pretty much treads water until the ﬁ nal 10 minutes. Sara Paxton and Pat Healy have a reasonably quirky-amusing sparring relationship playing Claire and Luke, two twentysomethings who – because of their interest in ghosts – have taken desk-clerking jobs at a hotel that is rumoured to be haunted and is on the point of closing down . It is pretty clear, though, that Claire really doesn’t know what to do with her life, and poor Luke has undeclared feelings for Claire. Kelly McGillis plays a mysterious ex-soap actress who checks into the hotel, and reveals herself to share their fascination. The movie never entirely ﬂ atlines, and there are some funny touches, but it annoyingly fails to do anything with the kooky situation it elaborately establishes, and there are no real shocks or laughs. PB little undercooked , playing more like an extended version of a very funny trailer than an actual, full-bodied comedy. Phelim O’Neill Sing Your Song ★★★★★ Dir: Susanne Rostock, Stars: Harry Belafonte. 104min. Cert: 12A A deeply respectful look at the extra- ordinary life of Harry “Day-O” Belafonte – the calypso musician and actor who helped Hollywood ﬁ nd its social conscience. With Belafonte’s endorse- ment (he narrates and appears as an interviewee), director Susanne Rostock tracks his decades of activism – from the civil rights movement, to Live Aid, to his work with Unicef – while avoiding any of the icky bits ( calling Condoleezza Rice and Colin Powell “house slaves” in the Bush administration , for instance). Belafonte took the biggest gamble an entertainer can – he risked appearing unpopular – and we could have asked the same of Rostock. The man’s good works are plain to see, but his person- ality remains an enigma. Henry Barnes Mission to Lars ★★★★★ Dirs: James Moore, William Spicer. With: Kate Spicer, Tom Spicer and William Spicer. 74min. Cert: 12A Worth your time, as well as your cash (proﬁ ts go to Mencap), Mission to Lars chronicles Kate and Will Spicer’s road trip round America with their brother, Tom, in pursuit of Lars Ulrich – the dinky Danish drummer from Metallica. It’s a challenge, not just because Metallica aren’t easy to meet, but because Tom, now 40, has Fragile X Syndrome; “a sort of autism with bells on” in Kate’s words. The peripheral interviews with the extended Spicer family are as compelling as the central quest; this is a ﬁ lm with rare honesty and nuance in a ﬁ eld that frequently feels queasy. CS it was made up, and with very little care. It’s a heavily ﬁ ctionalised version of events, complete with a full, corny complement of cliched characters and situations. The dramatis personae are so ﬂ at that there’s precious little risk or danger felt whenever they embark on missions. Though not directing, Lucas has had a heavy hand in this: it’s a project he’s been developing since the late 1980s, throwing in a lot of his cash , and spending over a year on reshoots and shepherding the copious and impressively dynamic dogﬁ ght sequences. But the rudimentary script sucks out all the excitement generated by the combat scenes. PO’N Undercooked … (above) Génesis Rodríguez and Gael García Bernal in Casa de Mi Padre; (below) Simon Pegg in A Fantastic Fear of Everything a rd. - y - n g k e s like s like g p k s W o r t h ( pro ﬁ t Lars c h r oad t r b b rot he U lri ch f rom M just b me e ha s of a w o wi as th nu f e e 22 The Guardian 08.06.12 Reviews Rock & Pop By Alexis Petridis Hot Chip In Our Heads DOMINO ★★★★★ “Look at where we are,” sings Alexis Taylor midway through Hot Chip’s ﬁ fth album. “Remember where we started out.” He appears to be singing, as is often the case, about a long-term relationship: almost uniquely in the world of dance music – not a genre famed for its way with a lyric about how nice it is being married – Hot Chip have a winning line in songs about the pleasures of domesticity and monogamy. But he could be singing about Hot Chip themselves. You can currently see them staring out from the shelves of sundry newsagents: magazine cover stars. Hot Chip look as uncomfortable as they always do in photographs; Taylor in particular wears an expression that suggests he ﬁ nds being on the cover of a magazine only moderately preferable to a body cavity search. But it doesn’t feel strange to see them there. In 2012, Hot Chip are, if not pop stars exactly, then certainly a beloved and longstanding part of the pop landscape. So it’s instructive to remember where they started out, if only to note how unlikely this state of aﬀ airs would once have seemed. Reading back the decidedly mixed reviews of their 2004 debut Coming On Strong, what’s striking is how many people seemed to think Hot Chip were a novelty act , presumably because of the way Hot Chip kept knowingly playing on the disparity between their middle-class Englishness and the ultra-macho hip-hop and R&B they loved. The lyrics of Playboy opened with a quotation from TS Eliot’s The Wasteland before hymning what a rapper would have referred to as Hot Chip’s whip: “Drivin’ in my Peugeot, 20in rims with the chrome now.” It’s a gag which they’re not above revisiting eight years on – “Do I look like a rapper?” asks Taylor on Night and Day but they do so in the knowledge that no one’s going to compare the results to Goldie Lookin’ Chain. Novelty act is a tough perception to shift. Hot Chip have done it partly by toning down the irony: Taylor’s query regarding his resemblance or otherwise to a rapper comes in the middle of an album packed with charmingly open-hearted songs. There’s no inverted commas around Motion Sickness’s joyful celebration of pop music’s constant changeability, or How Do You Do, another paen to the simple but deep pleasures of domestic contentment. More prosaically, they’ve done it by developing a distinctive and hugely appealing approach to electronic pop music. It nods at ongoing developments in dance music – the two-step beat of These Chains acknowledges the way post-dubstep producers are currently harking back to the sound of late-90s garage – without allowing them to overwhelm the band’s own identity. Hot Chip are clearly not the only artists in the world to boast wildly eclectic tastes , but what they’re exceptionally good at is synthesising those tastes into an impressively sleek and streamlined sound. No matter where the music on In Our Heads ventures – and it goes everywhere from a collision of 70s soft rock and constantly shifting prog on Now There Is Nothing to Flutes’ slowly unfurling mid-tempo house – it never feels forced. There’s a similar subtlety in the songwriting, which is deeply idiosyncratic without smashing you over the head with its quirkiness. Reﬂ ecting on where Hot Chip started out, you’re struck by the sense of a band maturing, gradually developing, improving at a steady pace. Doing that isn’t particularly fashionable in rock and pop music these days, which tends to deal in the excitement of grand, ﬂ ashy entrances, the ensuing dispiriting decline ignored because everyone’s moved on . Perhaps that’s why Hot Chip feel a little undervalued, longstanding part of the pop landscape or not: listening to In Our Heads, you do wonder why a band who make music this good and this unique aren’t huge stars. Then again, Taylor’s expression on that magazine cover suggests that’s the last thing Hot Chip want to be. Either way, in purely musical terms, where they are now is somewhere special. Hot Chip are one of our greatest exponents of quirky, compelling pop music – so why aren’t they getting the credit they deserve? Attention deficit Donnie and Joe Emerson – Baby I’d never heard of Donnie and Joe Emerson before Ariel Pink announced that the ﬁ rst single oﬀ his forthcoming album would be a cover of their 1979 album track Baby. Pink’s version is great, but the original is astonishing THIS WEEK ALEXIS LISTENED TO The novelty has worn oﬀ … Hot Chip PHOTOGRAPH STEVE GULLICK; JAMIE-JAMES MEDINA 08.06.12 The Guardian 23 Maximo Park The National Health V2 ★★★★★ “We’re in a global recession, and everyone is being bombarded with bouncy, happy music,” singer Paul Smith said recently – a bit richly, given the jauntiness of Maximo Park’s own output . The diﬀ erence is that if Maximo weren’t bouncing they’d be crying, and on their fourth album, the formless anxiety previously kept at bay by those bright, jerky guitars seems to be getting the upper hand. The title track , as spiky a thing as they’ve ever done, is riven by Smith’s increasingly frantic mayday call: “England is sick and I’m a casualty … the daily grind, the moral wealth – a portrait of the national health!” he screeches. The pivotal line in the atypically grungy Banlieue – “Here come the animals” – is another yelp of politically motivated disquiet. His jangled nerves infect the rest of the band: throughout the album, the guitars and electronics ﬁ zz with tension. Despite initial appearances, though, social commentary doesn’t play a big part; elsewhere, as on the careworn The Undercurrents, they revert to the usual examinations of why love is so foul. Overall: energised and good fun. Caroline Sullivan 2:54 2:54 FAT POSSUM ★★★★★ Guitars ﬂ icker like strobe lights, drums pound, and for 10 hold-your-breath seconds Revolving, the opening track on 2:54’s debut album, threatens to be the most thrilling quasi-goth melodrama you’ll hear all year. But then, snap: the drums sink into a plodding 4/4 beat, the guitars start sulking and the only points of interest are Colette Thurlow’s soaring vocals at the end of each chorus . Track two, You’re Early, repeats the pattern: bass notes hulk like abandoned warehouses against moonlit guitars; drums skitter through the shadows, and for 48 entire seconds Colette and her sister Hannah can do no wrong. But then it’s back to the 4/4 beat and the gloom-by-numbers and the feeling that the Thurlows are squandering their potential . So it goes on: Easy Undercover is strident where it could be sensual, Sugar aims for sinuous but settles for gloopy, and any hint of lyricism gets lost in a general murk. Maddy Costa Bobby Womack The Bravest Man in the Universe XL ★★★★★ As Bobby Womack recently reminded Alexis Petridis in these pages , he has survived everything from poverty to drug addiction to being shot by an infuriated wife. Now almost 70, the soul legend has poured the emotional fallout from such experiences into his ﬁ rst album of new material since 1994 . Producers Damon Albarn and XL’s Richard Russell have framed Womack’s lived-in vocals in stark, urbane, minimalist beats. Please Forgive My Heart brilliantly captures the realisation of this “legendary badass” that “sorry” Usher Looking 4 Myself RCA ★★★★★ Usher Raymond IV has carved out a megastar career not by innovating, but by seizing on dominant trends and delivering them more charismatically than anyone else. Looking 4 Myself ﬁ nds him trying to grab a slice of every cake going: Eurotrash trance (Euphoria), hipster-friendly synth clouds (Climax, What Happened To U), grumbling dubstep drops (I Care For U, Can’t Stop Won’t isn’t enough. In the similarly exemplary confessional Whatever Happened to the Times, he hits extraordinary notes as he sings of struggles with fading memories of long-lost better days. Other tracks vary the mood and pack a diﬀ erent power: Dayglo Reﬂ ection’s stylishly dreamy duet with Lana del Rey, Jubilee’s spiritual/gospel grooves and Love Is Gonna Lift You Up’s jubilant party feel. Womack claims this is the best album he’s made, and you wouldn’t argue because he’d punch you. But it’s an album he could only have made in the autumn of his life, at the apex of his game. Dave Simpson Cancer for Cure El-P New collection from the hip-hop pioneer: on this evidence, still the world’s standout ginger rapper Banga Patti Smith Reunited with Lenny Kaye and other old friends, Patti does her poetic- punk thing The Light the Dead See Soulsavers On which the duo have coaxed Dave Gahan into into a stream of superbly sung confessionals STILL HOT → 24 The Guardian 08.06.12 Reviews Rock & Pop Stop), the Neptunes used, amusingly, for a retro period piece (Twisted). Veering senselessly from genre to genre, the strategy is less coherent album, more disparate pick’n’mix – the same approach as Nicki Minaj’s similarly scattershot Pink Friday: Roman Reloaded, and one that undeniably makes sense in an iTunes/ Spotify age. Like Minaj, Usher succeeds on his own terms. Looking 4 Myself is bloated and self-conscious, but when it hits the spot it’s a feast of detailed, brilliantly gleaming R&B. Usher’s vocals are in ﬁ ne fettle – his falsetto lends his tortured paramour poses a degree of depth, while Lessons for the Lover ﬁ nds him harmonising with himself to astounding eﬀ ect. Most interesting is when the album goes in directions that don’t cleave to obvious aesthetics: the swampy blues bassline and rattling percussion of Sins of My Father, the classical violin sample threading through bumping 808 bass on IFU, adding a touch of courtliness to Usher’s lascivious come-ons. Alex Macpherson Various Artists Weirdlore: Notes from the Folk Underground FOLK POLICE RECORDINGS) ★★★★★ It used to be called psych folk or acid folk, but Ian Anderson, the editor of fRoots magazine, has now decided it should be known as “weirdlore”. Whatever you chose to call it, this is the quirky, spooky or experimental acoustic style that has its roots back in the late 60s and 70s, and those global fusion pioneers the Incredible String Band. The rebranding is a good excuse for an intriguing if uneven compilation featuring 18 very diﬀ erent current exponents, including Anderson himself. The best tracks are from folk artists who rework traditional songs with unexpected settings. Sproatly Smith’s Rosebuds in June matches ﬁ ne, drifting harmony vocals against a quirky backing . Then there’s a gently sturdy ballad from Alasdair Roberts, a quietly compelling song from Nancy Wallace, and several bands that veer between the pleasantly spooky and twee. RD Totally Enormous Extinct Dinosaurs Trouble POLYDOR ★★★★★ There’s a lot of clever things going on in this debut album by 22-year-old Orlando Higginbottom (below). Feted as the new face of pop/dance crossover, he wears headdresses like Lady Gaga and shows equal bravado in the musical inﬂ uences he has acquired. Higginbottom has the melancholic vocal style of art- dance faves Junior Boys, a dollop of Hot Chip’s playfulness and the retro- house music tones currently ﬁ ling fashionable danceﬂ oors across the UK. It’s a mix that can ﬁ t well together, as on Shimmer, where ﬂ ighty synths and a Latin house rhythm underpin the plaintive chorus “You could make me happy”, before giving way to a bass-driven section that suggests this happiness might not be immediately attainable. For the most part, however, enthusiasm and inﬂ uences are not matched by the songwriting. Garden, the soundtrack to a Nokia ad campaign, is a case in point; its jaunty hook sticking in your head over 30 seconds, but over the course of four and a half minutes, it begins to sound a little over-exposed. Paul MacInnes Gabby Young and Other Animals The Band Called Out for More GIFT OF THE GAB ★★★★★ A gloriously cheerful live performer with an entertaining jumble of styles that match her ﬂ amboyant image, Gabby Young (left) could easily be dismissed as a good-time novelty act best suited to parties and festivals. There are certainly furiously upbeat songs here, from the opening In Your Head to the stomping title track, but they only work so well because there’s skill, technique and bravery mixed in with her energy. She has the power, clarity and precision of an opera diva – at 12, she was the youngest member of the National Youth Choir – but she is also an impressive jazz singer, as she shows on Clay Heart and the gospel-edged Open . This is her second album, and it’s ﬁ lled with often unexpectedly thoughtful, sophisticated songs that continually switch direction, from cool guitar, accordion or piano-backed balladry to furious trumpet and trombone- backed workouts. Robin Denselow To download or buy any reviewed CD, go to guardian.co.uk/music/reviews or call 0330 333 6840. a rtists w with u n S m a N a t ha spo o m ost p art, h owever , u ences th e n , t h e i a s e ou r T g 0 ← PHOTOGRAPH SUKI DHANDA 08.06.12 The Guardian 25 TICKETS FROM £10 buy tickets: 0844 847 9910 Southbankcentre.co.uk/ africautopia A festival of music, dance, film, literature, fashion and free events with Baaba Maal & Friends Paco Peña Angelique Kidjo Gregory Maqoma Oumou Sangaré & Béla Fleck Noo Saro-Wiwa Chika Unigwe Taj Mahal Vocal Ensemble of Africa Muntu Valdo Nuruddin Farah Funmi Olawumi The Ultimate Afrobeats Utopia Inua Ellams Bellini: Il Pirata Giannattasio/Bros/ Tézier/LPO/Parry OPERA RARA ★★★★★ Il Pirata made Bellini ’s name at its premiere in October 1827, a few days before his 26th birthday. A r emarkable work, it contains, almost fully formed, the essence of both his pre occupations and style. The n arrative, in typical Bellini fashion, focuses on a woman suﬀ ering at the hands of unreliable men: Imogene, forced into marriage with Ernesto, is suddenly confronted with her former lover Gualtiero (the pirate of the title), then driven slowly insane when both men accuse her of sexual betrayal. Psychological intensity, meanwhile, is gen erated through the naked exposure of the human voice, pushed almost to its technical limits in a quest for expressive extremes. Even during the course of Bellini’s short career, however, the opera’s popularity was eclipsed by that of his other works. Though championed by Maria Callas in the 50s and Montserrat Caballé a generation later, performances are still rare. This is its ﬁ rst recording for over 30 years, and even though it sheds new light on the work, it is also something of a disappointment. It comes super- complete, including an anticlimactic second-act ﬁ nale that Bellini wisely dropped in revivals. It also comes over as being less of a diva vehicle and more about men. This, in part, is due to the restoration of some frequently cut material, but also, more pertinently, to an exceptional performance from Ludovic Tézier as Ernesto – wonderfully sung and characterised with immense subtlety. The rest of it isn’t in the same league. David Parry’s conducting lacks cumulative tension. José Bros’s Gualtiero sounds suitably arrogant, if less than glamorous, while Carmen Giannattasio ’s Imogene is unthreatened by the role’s technical challenges, but not ideally alert to its dramatic complexity. You’ll know what’s missing if you know the recordings with Callas and Caballé, both on EMI and still to be preferred. Tim Ashley Sandrine Piau: Le Triomphe de l’Amour Piau/Les Paladins/ Correas NAIVE ★★★★★ After her recent forays into 19th- and 20th-century song, Sandrine Piau ’s latest album marks her return to Baroque music with a programme of monologues about love from 17th- and 18th-century French opera. This is a vast subject, too complex to be contained on a single disc, and this feels a bit like a whistle- stop tour through a colossal and at times unfamiliar repertory. The tour also gets oﬀ to a bumpy start, with a formidably diﬃ cult aria from Gr étry’s L’Amant Jaloux that brings with it some aspirated coloratura and a couple of uncharacteristically shrill high notes. Things mercifully then settle down, and Piau gives us extracts from Lully , Rameau and Rebel at their most ravishing, together with rarities by Favart and Sacchini, all of them delivered with that rapturous, ﬂ oating tone that makes her so special. J ér ôme Correas and Les Paladins are fabulous in this repertory, and there are some lovely dances by Rameau woven in between the arias. Beautiful stuﬀ that leaves you wanting more. TA Reviews Classical and jazz Pat Metheny Unity Band (NONESUCH) ★★★★★ Pat Metheny ’s Unity Band is a wave to his ﬁ ne album 80/81, which featured the late Michael Brecker and Dewey Redman on saxes. Their roles are merged here by the versatile Chris Potter, accompanied by regular drummer Antonio Sanchez and gifted bass newcomer Ben Williams. The themes are typical Metheny : sensuous Latin grooves, synth-guitar fusion, folksy ballads, a good deal of jazz swing – and the rhythm section is mindboggling, not to mention beautifully recorded . Roofdogs evokes the long-running Pat Metheny Group with its horn-like guitar synth and Breakdealer oﬀ ers a short-burst theme for everybody to solo on. It’s all about the playing skills of a dazzling band, which live shows will undoubtedly ram home even harder. John Fordham Unthreatened … Carmen Giannattasio, (above); Pat Metheny (below) PHOTOGRAPH CHRISTIAN ALMINANA/GETTY a di va ve hi c l e an d s, in p art, i on u t y e d wit h h e rest lea g ue. c ting s ion. g ant , s , ne d eally n ow know C allas and and still A s h le y l at e Ba r of m 17t h op er a c omp le disc, a n s top t o t imes u al a so g a fo G J a c s hrill h th en s u s ex t a nd R t oge t and S w it h t h a t C o r fa b t h Ra a r y LYRIC THEATRE 0844 412 4661 THRILLER – LIVE! Songs of Michael & the Jackson 5 Tue-Fri7.30, Sat 4&8, Sun 3.30&7.30 ‘THE SHOW IS AS BRILLIANT AND FRESH AS EVER!’ Magic 105.4 www,thrillerlive.com DOMINION 0844 847 1775 WE WILL ROCK YOU by QUEEN & BEN ELTON Mon-Sat 7.30, Mat Sat 2.30 Extra show last Wednesday of every month at 2.30 www.wewillrockyou.co.uk Entertainment PALLADIUM 0844 412 2957 Des O'Connor & Sophie Evans in Andrew Lloyd Webber's THE WIZARD OF OZ Tue-Sat7.30, Wed/Sat 2.30, Sun3 £25 Day Seats From 10am in Person A mbassadors 08448 112 334 STOMP Mon & Wed – Sat 8pm Thu & Sat 3pm, Sun 3pm & 6pm Prince Edward 0844 482 5152 JERSEY BOYS Winner Best Musical! Oliviers Tue-Sat 7.30,Tue&Sat 3pm, Sun 5pm PRINCE OF WALES 0844 482 5114 'FANTASTIC FUN' Classic FM MAMMA MIA! Mon-Thu 7.30, Fri 5 & 8.30, Sat 3 & 7.30 www.Mamma-Mia.com OLD V IC 0844 871 7628 THE DUCHESS OF MALFI Mon – Sat 7.30, Wed & Sat 2.30pm MUST END 9 JUNE Globe Theatre 020 7401 9919 Henry V open now shakespearesglobe.com QUEEN'S 0844 482 5160 LES MISERABLES WINNER! 2012 Olivier Audience Award Eves 7.30, Mats Wed & Sat 2.30 www.LesMis.com Piccadilly Theatre 0844 871 3010 "A spectacular, pulse-racing fantasy" Time Magazine GHOST THE MUSICAL Mon-Sat 19:30, Thu & Sat 14:30 www.ghostthemusical.com A ldwych Theatre 0844 8471712 TOP HAT "A musical like this comes around once in a lifetime." Sunday Tel Mon-Sat 7.30, Thur & Sat 2.30 www.tophatonstage.com V audeville Theatre 0844 4124 663 "100 laughs a minute" The Obs What The Butler Saw By Joe Orton Mon-Sat 19.30, Thurs & Sat 14.30 www.whatthebutlersawtheplay.com A POLLO THEATRE 0844 412 4658 DAVID SUCHET LAURIE METCALF LONG DAY’S JOURNEY INTO NIGHT By Eugene O’Neill Mo, Tu & Thu - Sat 7, Wed 2.30 Run time 2hr 30mins plus interval Wyndham’s 0844 482 5120 ABIGAIL’S PARTY www.abigailsparty.co.uk Mon - Sat 7.45, Thurs & Sat 3pm LYCEUM 0844 871 3000 book online www.thelionking.co.uk Disney Presents THE LION KING Tue-Sat 7.30pm, Wed,Sat,Sun 2.30 Special summer schedule including Thursday matinees from 19 July Groups 08448717644 / 02078450949 GARRICK THEATRE HORRIBLE HISTORIES 0844 482 9673 www.barmybritain.com 'Bloody, marvellous stuff!' EXP New London Theatre 020 7452 3000 / 0844 412 4654 WAR HORSE Day seats available from 10am Warhorseonstage.com NOVELLO 0844 482 5170 NOISES OFF MICHAEL FRAYN Mon-Sat 7.30, Thu & Sat 2.30 www.noisesoffwestend.com V ICTORIA PALACE 0844 811 0055 BILLY ELLIOT THE MUSICAL Mon–Sat 7:30, Thu & Sat 2:30pm Billyelliotthemusical.com The Threesixty Theatre 08448717693 KENSINGTON GARDENS THE LION, THE WITCH AND THE WARDROBE By CS Lewis Adapt. by Rupert Goold Mon 7, Wed–Sat 7.30, Sat 2.30 Sun 12 & 3.30 www.lionwitchtheshow.com St Martin's 08444 991515 60th year of Agatha Christie's THE MOUSETRAP Evenings 7.30 Mats. Tues 3 Sat 4 www.the-mousetrap.co.uk Criterion Theatre 0844 847 2483 London’s Funniest Comedy The 39 Steps Mon-Sat 8pm, Wed 3pm & Sat 4pm A POLLO V ICTORIA 0844 847 1696 WICKED WickedTheMusical.co.uk Mon-Sat 7.30pm Wed & Sat 2.30pm Shaftesbury Theatre 0207 379 5399 ROCK OF AGES THE SMASH HIT MUSICAL Rockofagesmusical.co.uk FORTUNE 0844 871 7626 THE WOMAN IN BLACK Tue-Sat8pm, Tues&Thu3pm, Sat4pm www.thewomaninblack.com The Pinter Theatre 0844 871 7622 David Hare/Terence Rattigan SOUTH DOWNS/ THE BROWNING VERSION Mon-Sat 7.30, Thurs & Sat 2.30 www.browningversion.co.uk Cambridge Theatre 08444124652 WINNER 7 OLIVIER AWARDS Roald Dahl’s MATILDA THE MUSICAL Tue 7, Wed-Sat 7.30, Wed & Sat 2.30, Sun 3 www.matildathemusical.com SAVOY THEATRE 0844 871 7687 DANNY DEVITO RICHARD GRIFFITHS THE SUNSHINE BOYS BY NEIL SIMON Playhouse Theatre 0844 871 7627 DREAMBOATS & PETTICOATS HER MAJESTY'S 0844 412 2707 THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA CELEBRATING 25 YEARS Mon-Sat 7.30, Thu & Sat 2.30 www.ThePhantomOfTheOpera.com RHYTHM FESTIVALS 2012 RHYTHM | FOLK RHYTHM & BLUES AUGUST BANK HOLIDAY WEEKEND FRI 24 to SUN 26 3 Great Music Festivals for the Price of One Old Warden Park in Bedfordshire (A1) Friday 24 HAWKWIND WILKO JOHNSON THE SLACKERS THE BEAT GENO WASHINGTON The Strawbs JIM MORAY BAND Saturday 25 BOOKER T THE DAMNED Blues Band PEATBOG FAERIES DAVID KNOPFLER BIG BOY BLOATER The Groundhogs HERE & NOW TRAVELLING BAND Sunday 26 KEN BOOTHE JOHN COOPER CLARKE OLI BROWN SHOW OF HANDS | LAU Scott Matthews Crazy World of ARTHUR BROWN DAVID RODIGAN Hat Fitz & Tara + dozens more acts on six stages Tickets & info: www.rhythm festival.com PHOENIX THEATRE 08448717629 BLOOD BROTHERS DRURY LANE 0844 871 8810 SHREK THE MUSICAL Theatres London 08.06.12 The Guardian 27 PHOTOGRAPHS XXXXXX Preview Games L et me begin by declaring an interest: I love the Game of Thrones television series. Love it. In the sense that I want to buy a house in the countryside with it and have kids and grow old together. It has bewitched me, mind, body and soul, to the point where I measure out my life in the week-long countdowns between episodes , and I plunged into what will surely be months of inconsolable depression when the second season came to a close this week. What’s striking about Game of Thrones (Xbox 360 / PS3 / PC) the game – or Video Game of Thrones, if you prefer – is that it’s not a mere cash- in. In fact, developers Cyanide Studios bought the rights to the books before HBO had committed to make the show. When they began work on the game, they had no way of knowing that its popularity would explode . Unlikely though it sounds, this was a passion project, not a tie-in. While a few characters from the books and TV show make appearances, by and large, Video Game of Thrones tells two new , separate stories, plotted in collaboration with author George RR Martin. The two protagonists’ tales are played out in alternating chapters. You begin the game as Mors, a battle- scarred veteran of the Night’s Watch, out on a grisly mission to bring a rapist to justice . While his appearance is pre- determined, Mors can be built as one of three classes, and dialogue decisions allow him to be played as cold-hearted killer or gentle giant. The events take place simultaneously with the events of the ﬁ rst series of the show, and Mors’ quest begins with the arrival of a letter from John Arryn, the character whose death sets the saga’s plot in motion. Survive th e ﬁ rst adventure and the or placated by the introduction of higher taxes on the wealthy nobles . Each choice will have knock-on eﬀ ects later in the game. There’s none of the open-world freedom of bigger RPGs, but the narrow focus allows for a rich and fast-moving story. Gameplay is more of a mixed bag. There are some brilliant innovations, of which the potions system is a highlight. It has always bugged me that in a standard RPG, the player can stock up on 50 or 100 health potions and basically booze their way through battles quaﬃ ng a tonic every time a bad guy blinks. Here, the player has to collect reﬁ llable ﬂ asks before he can carry a potion at all , can carry no more than ﬁ ve ﬂ asks at a time, and has to resupply after downing each measure. Another classy touch is the optional strengths and weaknesses in character creation. You’re free to load up Mors and Alester with perks, combat expertise and skills, but must counterbalance each with a corresponding vulnerability, such as allergies, gout or pyrophobia. In fact, character creation is impressive: there are six classes, a choice of three for each character, and a two-sided skill tree for each class, plus a dozen weapon and armour types to specialise in, on top of which there are perks and abilities picked up through in-game action. It’s only in the heat of combat that the game fails to deliver: battles consist largely of repetitive turn-based auto- attacks, with a limited role for tactics, player skill or ﬂ air. It’s not a game that will wow a Skyrim player, or whisk a newcomer away into its world. But for a fan of the tales of Westeros a little old-fashioned hack’n’wait’n’slash will be a small price to pay for two whole new chapters. Game on Thrones delivers with new chapters – but fails in combat By Tom Meltzer action shifts to the grimy fort town of Riverspring, where priest and heir to the castle Alester has returned a decade after running away. Alester has come to attend his father’s funeral, but soon discovers something is rotten in the town of Riverspring. Several things, in fact: his dad’s death was no accident, a suspect half-brother is plotting to hijack the succession and the starving peasants are on the verge of revolt. The central narrative is linear, but most problems can be approached in a variety of ways: the rioting peasants can be put to the sword, calmed with food taken from the castle’s stores Rioting peasants can be put to the sword or placated with taxes on the rich 28 The Guardian 08.06.12 Reviews Television IN THE GUIDE TOMORROW Sharon Horgan – star of BBC3 sitcom Dead Boss – explains what TV has taught her about prison life. For more on your favourite shows: guardian.co.uk/tv A week in radio Far away from tickle sticks Inevitably, Radio 3 garners most plaudits for its music. But other strands are just as strong and, this week, a very good place to hide from ubiquitous jubilee coverage elsewhere. Its arts coverage is a quiet treasure, with dedicated time and depth for really rich listens, and a rather marvellous eclecticism. Night Waves is always good, and often excellent. This week’s stand-out programme was Matthew Sweet’s interview with Ken Dodd (Tuesday) . Yes, Ken Dodd. On Radio 3. It was a terriﬁ c insight into a performer who has performed for audiences for 77 years and has an academic obsession with how comedy works; the impres- sion you were left with was a long way from tickling sticks. He told Sweet how he likes to visit libraries while on tour, borrowing books on “humour, comedy, laughter”. He once got a two-day pass to the Bodleian when he played Oxford. “That,” he said, “was going into paradise.” Dodd has notebooks detailing how every joke has gone down in every location, and talks easily about the “poetry” and “symbolism” in a really good gag. This interview didn’t trawl through the usual life story and well-trodden anec- dotes, but let the comedian talk about a craft he knows better than most. The Sunday Feature is another reliably fascinating slot, and this week neuro scientist and writer David Eagle- man explored the work of Italo Calvino . This was a beautifully composed pro- gramme, as sparky and productively meandering as Calvino’s writing, and full of clever people unpicking his par- ticular skill without losing its magic. Marina Warner described folk tales, in Calvino’s hands, as being “the sediment of people’s experiences, transformed into a universal lan- guage by the fantasy”. Calvino, in a crackly clip, denied that his writing was an escape from reality. “To give a fantastic shape is a way to look inside ourselves and inside our problems,” he insisted. Realism might have been easier, though. “I am always compli- cating my life,” he added with a soft chuckle. “I don’t know why.” Elisabeth Mahoney In the summer of 1947 something crash –landed in the desert near Roswell, New Mexico. US armed forces claimed it was a high-altitude balloon; others to this day maintain it was a UFO . The clever idea in Roswell , which aired on TV from 1999 to 2002, is that there were indeed aliens involved in that crash and some of them are still alive, masquerading as regular (if pre- posterously good-looking) teenagers at the local high school. In a backwater town where alien-related tourism is now the only growth business (there’s a tacky UFO museum and a cafe called the Crashdown on the high street), Max, Isabel and Michael don’t stand out much. They consume a lot of Tabasco, especially on sweet stuﬀ , but they keep their alien superpowers a secret, even from the people who took them in when they came wandering, naked and confused, out of the desert. Then one day Max (played by Jason Behr) is in the Crashdown when wait- ress Liz (Shiri Appleby) gets hit by a stray bullet. He uses his superpowers to save her life and, in doing so, betrays himself. “What are you?” Liz asks him. “Well, I’m not from around here,” says Max. “Where you from?” she says. Max points up to the ceiling. “Up north?” says Liz. Max raises his ﬁ nger, pointing higher still. From that moment on, the Your next box set Roswell aliens’ relatively sheltered existence begins to unravel. Roswell bears the ugly marks of a show thrashing about for survival. Tone and content lurch from romance to comedy to wobbly-setted sci-ﬁ , and the plot doesn’t always come good on its own logic. Bits of it are complicated enough to baﬄ e even the most committed viewer. (One wouldn’t want to be pressed on why it took 40 or so years for our heroes to emerge from their pods in the desert, for example, or why a fourth alien, Tess, got separated from them, or indeed on the back stories of all the other aliens who crawl out of the woodwork.) But all that said, this is a delicious story, sharply written and played out with great verve. There’s real chem- istry between Max and Liz, the star- crossed lovers from diﬀ erent planets. Liz could easily have become a boring goody-two-shoes, but the episode in which, tight with fury, she sets out to prove that a friend was murdered, should oﬀ er proof enough that she’s heroine material; and there’s great fun to be had from the relationship between Michael (Brendan Fehr) and Liz’s friend Maria (Majandra Delﬁ no). Isabel is played by the marvellous Katherine Heigl, while Colin Hanks (son of Tom) and Nick Wechsler (now of Revenge fame) are both excellent if underused. The show was cancelled after three seasons despite protests from its devoted fans. Thankfully though, like all those conspiracy theories, Roswell is still out there: you can pick up the box set for about £20. Bargain! Emily Wilson f u ll o f c l ticular s Ma ri n i n se s s s s d t tr a gua g crackl y w as an f antas t oursel v he insi easier, catin g m chuckle chuckle d ) . w i f e e Delicious story … Majandra Delﬁ no and Jason Behr in Roswell; Ken Dodd PHOTOGRAPHS SPORTSPHOTO LTD/ALLSTAR; TRISTRAM KENTON; EPA 08.06.12 The Guardian 29 Coming up in this article: I will consider a television programme about Prince William. I will question whether I still have the appetite for anything to do with that family. There will be snarky criticism of the talking heads who appear on the show. And there will be asparagus … A nnoying, isn’t it? But I’m worried that if I don’t tell you in advance what I’m going to say, you might go and read something else. It’s what so many unimaginative, formulaic TV documentaries – including this one – do. Then there are further teasers before every advert break, just in case you’re tempted to go changing. You end up seeing everything twice. Grrrr. Anyway … Oh, for God’s sake, I thought this odd national display of buntastic monarchism was over. But no sooner have the ﬂ ags stopped waving for the Queen’s 60 years on her throne, than they’re out again, waving for her grandson’s 30 years on the planet. There’s nothing very interesting or surprising about William at 30 (ITV1). It’s a familiar trawl through his life, showing all the old clips. A little boy in shorts, ﬁ rst days at various schools, that water slide at Thorpe Park, a miserable looking “holiday” at Balmoral, the sad walk behind his mother’s coﬃ n, Canada, Chile, cleaning another kind of throne just like every- one else, Kate, helicopters, thinning a bit on top, the wedding (quick, before she notices), more ﬂ ag-waving. It has been a fairly extraordinary life, but it’s a story I feel I know; these are reminders rather than revelations. Between and over the clips, heads talk. The usual ones, saying the usual things (fawning). Jennie Bond? Present. Arthur the Sun photographer? Here. Katie from the Mail on Sunday? Yes (in the same royal blue dress she was wearing when she was a talking head in another documentary about William, also on ITV, a few weeks ago). ﬁ nding signiﬁ cance and poignancy where some people might see … well, not a lot. Like when Kate sang along to Take That’s Back For Good, and she was, literally, back for good, with William. “He’s probably everything we could possibly ask for in a prince and a future king,” she concludes. But she’s just pipped at the post for the job of fawner in chief by Phillip Schoﬁ eld. “It was bubbling, cracking with excitement and glee,” he says of the wedding. Schoﬁ eld was “very lucky to talk to him about his time as a pilot”. And his birthday message to the prince would be to say: “I hope they give you a couple of days oﬀ , Sir.” Eurgh, it’s that “Sir” that really makes the skin creep, like Alan Titchmarsh the other day. I think Schoﬁ eld is in a three-way race to a knighthood, with Messrs Titchmarsh and Barlow. And they’re neck and neck going into the home straight, the home straight up the collective royal back passage. Coming up, in the ﬁ nal part of the article, will be asparagus, as promised … Yeah, enough already, I’ve done that, and there aren’t even advert breaks in here. Yet. Something else that everyone on the show agrees is that William is just the same as everyone else. “One of the lads,” says the guy from Chile. “One of the lads,” says a friend from St Andrews uni, where he was let alone, to go to the supermarket … But then William himself spoils everything in an inter- view. “I just want to go in there and get my asparagus or whatever,” he says about his shopping trips. Just like one of the lads. Oh William, if only you’d said a tin of beans, you might have got away with the lads thing. Interesting: I wonder how blue blood aﬀ ects the stinky pee thing with asparagus. The royal wee. Does one’s number one reek, I wonder? And does he clean his own throne afterwards? Last night's TV The usual bunch of talking heads agree: William’s all we could wish for in a prince By Sam Wollaston Some posh old trout, Lady So-and-So, the Queen’s cousin, who was also in that one? Yis. Various former press secretaries and protection oﬃ cers etc. Yes Sir. Oh, and Roya Nikkhah from the Sunday Telegraph. What a splendid name for a royal reportah. Happily, they all have excellent access to the inside of Prince William’s head, and know exactly how he felt about the death of his mother, being heir to the throne, royal duties, everything. They may not agree about some of the details (Jennie says Charles went to tell William of Diana’s death at around 7am; Katie says it was after 7.30). But they all agree on the one crucial thing: that Wills is totes brills. Royal blue Katie is right up there as queen ﬂ ag-waver, at the front, pressed to the barricade (she queued overnight to get on this show), waving away, AND ANOTHER THING Football. Back already. Thank heaven. One of the lads – until he starts talking asparagus … Prince William with Kate 30 The Guardian 08.06.12 Watch this TV and radio Match Of The Day Live; Euro 2012 Live 4.15pm, BBC1; 7.15pm, ITV1 And so a summer of international sporting der- ring-do kicks oﬀ with the humdinger that is … Poland v Greece. As you’ll recall – unless you dozed oﬀ during the ﬁ nal – the Greeks bored their way to victory in the 2004 tournament. Co-hosts Poland, meanwhile, haven’t played a competitive game for two years. The last match between these two , in March 2011, ended 0-0. Gary Lineker has the unenviable task of making this encounter sound excit- ing. Later, on ITV1, Adrian Chiles sinks his teeth into the more appetising pros- pect of Russia v the Czech Republic. Sam Richards Punk Britannia 9pm, BBC4 This week, the series moves towards 1976-78, when punk created moral panic in a Britain lost in a torpor of “browns and oranges”, as John Cooper Clarke puts it. John Lydon, who’s never really stopped snarling, is among those recounting the rise of the Sex Pistols, from swearing on the Bill Grundy show to the top of the charts with God Save The Queen. Punks faced op- position, often violent, from rival Teddy Boys, the police and Welsh religious zealots alike. But these years also saw the emergence of char- acters like Siouxsie Sioux and the late Poly Styrene, celebrated in an excel- lent Arena documentary which follows at 11.30pm. David Stubbs Episodes 10pm, BBC2 In an oﬀ ering with a whiﬀ of mid-season drift about it, the (mis)adventures of the team behind Pucks! continue. For Carol, this means being assertive and insisting that Merc marks the ﬁ fth anniversary of the couple’s aﬀ air. A weekend away beckons, good news for Merc’s wife Jamie as she and Matt LeBlanc plan “48 hours of the dirty stuﬀ ”. Elsewhere, Sean’s Facebook ineptitude brings Matt’s stalker, the improbably named Labia, back into the actor’s orbit. Jonathan Wright Episodes, BBC2 Channel 4 Monteverdi, Chopin, Glinka, Delius, Vivaldi, Debussy, Rossini, Purcell, Schiavetto, Bizet, Scarlatti, Madetoja and Ravel. Radio 4 92.4-94.6 MHz; 198kHz 6.0 Today. 9.0 Desert Island Discs. Kirsty Young talks to Margaret Rhodes. (R) 9.45 (LW) Act Of Worship. 9.45 (FM) Book Of The Week: Strands. By Jean Sprackland, abridged by Miranda Davies. 10.0 (LW) (FM) Woman’s Hour. 10.45 (LW) Test Match Special. England v West Indies. 11.0 (FM) The Man Who Saves Life Stories. The story of a man who collects people’s diaries. 11.30 (FM) Births, Deaths And Marriages. By David Schneider. 12.0 (FM) News 12.04 (LW) Test Match BBC1 BBC2 ITV1 6.0pm Eggheads (S) 6.30 Great British Railway Journeys (R) (S) (AD) Michael Portillo travels to Cromer in Norfolk. 6.0pm Local News (S) 6.20 ITV News (S) 6.45 Emmerdale (S) (AD) Ashley is in for a shock at the job centre. 6.0pm The Simpsons (R) (S) (AD) Lisa becomes a vegetarian. 6.30 Hollyoaks (S) (AD) Ste tells Doug he’s in love with Brendan. 7.0 Great British Menu (S) In the series ﬁ nale, the winners prepare their dishes for the Olympic feast hosted by Steve Redgrave at the Old Royal Naval College in Greenwich. 7.15 Euro 2012 Live (S) Russia meet Czech Republic in the second match of the tournament. Adrian Chiles introduces coverage from the Municipal Stadium in Wroclaw, Poland. Kick- oﬀ is at 7.45. 7.0 Channel 4 News (S) 7.30 Unreported World (S) Ramita Navai is in Honduras to investigate reports of hundreds of women being forced to work in Mexico’s sex industry. 7.55 4thought.tv (S) 7.0pm BBC News (S) 7.30 Regional News (S) 8.0 Coast (R) (S) Nick Crane discovers evidence that a tsunami struck the coast of Wales and England 400 years ago. 8.30 Gardeners’ World (S) Rachel de Thame helps get the royal barge in shape. 8.0 Come Dine With Me (S) Four competitive spirits from Chichester in West Sussex take up the dinner-party challenge. 8.0 EastEnders (S) (AD) Kat is back at the Vic, and immediately forces Roxy to move out. 8.30 Casualty (S) (AD) Lenny helps Linda search for Britney after she gets into a stranger’s car. 9.0 The Great British Story: A People’s History (S) (AD) Michael Wood delves into what life would have been like for the average Anglo-Saxon after the Norman conquest of 1066. 9.0 Alan Carr’s Summertime Specstacular (S) The comedian puts on a summer party with guests David Walliams, Justin Bieber, the Saturdays, the cast of Made in Chelsea and Rizzle Kicks. 9.20 Have I Got News For You (S) Kirsty Young guest-hosts the last in the current series of the news quiz, with panellists Victoria Coren and Greg Davies. 11.0 The Book Review Show (S) Martha Kearney hosts. 11.50 The Black Balloon (Elissa Down, 2008) (S) Thoughtful coming-of-age drama starring Rhys Wakeﬁ eld, Luke Ford and Toni Collette. 11.05 Stand Up For The Week (S) Jon Richardson hosts the satirical comedy show. 11.55 Big Momma’s House (Raja Gosnell, 2000) (S) (AD) Feeble comedy starring Martin Lawrence and Nia Long. 11.20 The National Lottery Friday Night Draws (S) 11.30 Euro 2012 Highlights (S) Colin Murray presents action from Poland vs Greece and Russia vs Czech Republic. Radio 3 90.2-92.4 MHz 6.30 Breakfast. Music, news and the occasional surprise, presented by Petroc Trelawny. 9.0 Essential Classics. Rob Cowan introduces the Essential CD of the Week, and performances by the Artist of the Week, conductor Adrian Boult. His guest is historian and author Peter Hennessy. 12.0 Composer Of The Week: Joseph Haydn. Donald Macleod charts the latter part of Haydn’s career, which comprised a series of grand public masterpieces. Radio Towards the end however, he returned to his favoured string quartets. 1.0 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert. From the Leamington Chamber Series, Ensemble 360 plays a work by Saint-Saens, and the Doric String Quartet performs Schubert’s epic quartet in D minor. 2.0 Afternoon On 3. John Shea concludes the week’s programmes devoted to Austrian music with Act 3 of Strauss’s Die Frau ohne Schatten, featuring the Vienna Philharmonic under Christian Thielemann. 4.30 In Tune. Live music from cellist Matthew Barley and the duo pianist- composer Arthur Jeﬀ es and violinist Oli Langford. 6.30 Composer Of The Week: Joseph Haydn. (R) 7.30 Radio 3 Live In Concert. The start of the 2012 Aldeburgh Festival live from Snape Maltings Concert Hall, Suﬀ olk, with Oliver Knussen’s operatic adaptation of two of Maurice Sendak’s books for children. 10.0 The Verb. Ian McMillan’s guests include novelist Kevin Barry and poet Ross Sutherland. 10.45 The Essay: The Age Of Creativity. Composer Francis Pott looks back at his creative life and measures the beneﬁ ts of wisdom against the grim reality of mortality. (R) 11.0 World On 3. Mary Ann Kennedy introduces a session with Cuban pianist and bandleader Roberto Fonseca, whose latest album Yo! has just been released. 1.0 Through The Night. With music by Brahms, Mozart, Peeters, Hummel, 10.0 Episodes (S) (AD) Jamie and Matt prepare for a romantic holiday in Napa, California. 10.30 Newsnight (S) With Gavin Esler. 10.0 ITV News At Ten (S) 10.30 Local News (S) 10.35 Burn After Reading (Ethan Coen, Joel Coen, 2008) (S) (AD) Comedy with Brad Pitt, George Clooney and Frances McDormand. 10.0 BBC News (S) 10.25 Regional News And Weather (S) 10.35 The Graham Norton Show (S) Norton is joined by Cheryl Cole, Katy Perry and Ross Noble. Film of the day Burn After Reading (10.35pm, ITV1) Not the greatest Coen brothers comedy, but a starry cast including Clooney, Pitt, Malkovich and Swinton caper through an entertaining Washington-set farce 08.06.12 The Guardian 31 Other channels E4 6.0pm The Big Bang Theory. The friends cross paths again with Wil Wheaton. 6.30 The Big Bang Theory. Penny’s dad pays a visit. 7.0 Hollyoaks. The proﬁ ts from the Savages’ festival are stolen. 7.30 How I Met Your Mother. Lily applies for a ﬁ rearms licence after Marshall is mugged. 8.0 The Big Bang Theory. Raj faces being sent back to India. 8.30 2 Broke Girls. Caroline tries to make extra money by taking another job. 9.0 Zoolander. Comedy, starring Ben Stiller. 10.45 Revenge. Emily targets a crooked ﬁ nancier. 11.45 The Big Bang Theory. The friends cross paths again with Wil Wheaton. Film4 7.0pm Down With Love. Romantic comedy set in the 1960s, starring Ewan McGregor and Renee Zellweger. 9.0 Layer Cake. Crime thriller, starring Daniel Craig. 11.05 Aeon Flux. Sci-ﬁ martial arts thriller, with Charlize Theron. FX 6.0pm Falling Skies. Tom confronts Weaver about his ﬁ tness to command. 7.0 NCIS. Fornell and his daughter are threatened. 8.0 NCIS. A missing Navy lieutenant’s car is found covered in blood. 9.0 NCIS. The team discovers the elusive arsonist is not working alone. 10.0 Dexter. The forensics expert takes desperate measures to catch the Doomsday Killers. 11.0 Family Guy. The Griﬃ ns move to Texas. 11.30 Family Guy. Chris is expelled from school. 12.0 American Dad! Pilot episode of the animated comedy. ITV2 6.0pm The Jeremy Kyle Show USA. The host takes his successful talk-show stateside. 7.0 The Cube. Two more contestants take on the challenge. 8.0 You’ve Been Framed! Harry Hill narrates camcorder calamities. 8.30 You’ve Been Framed! Featuring clips of macho men and feathered friends. 9.0 Notting Hill. Romantic comedy, starring Julia Roberts and Hugh Grant. 11.30 Peter Andre: My Life. Peter heads to Los Angeles to begin recording his new album. Last in the series. Channel 5 BBC3 BBC4 Atlantic Sky1 6.0pm The Middle. Mike has to decide between a basketball tournament and a funeral. 6.30 Futurama. Bender causes an environmental disaster. 7.0 The Simpsons. Lisa investigates her ancestry. 7.30 The Simpsons. Marge invites Nelson Muntz to stay. 8.0 Futurama. Fry goes on his ﬁ rst trip to the moon. 8.30 The Simpsons. Bart discovers a passion for American history. 9.0 A League Of Their Own. With Joe Hart, Claudia Winkleman and John Bishop. Last in the series. 10.0 An Idiot Abroad 2. Karl Pilkington watches whales in Alaska. 11.0 Dog The Bounty Hunter. Tracking fugitives. 12.0 Road Wars. The Dog Unit visits the aftermath of a ﬁ ght. Sky Arts 1 6.0pm From The Basement. Performances by Queens of the Stone Age, Cold War Kids and Zee Avi. 6.50 In Love With Coward. With Craig Roberts and Sheila Hancock. 7.0 The South Bank Show. A proﬁ le of Regeneration author Pat Barker. 8.0 Athol Fugard. Proﬁ le of the South African novelist and playwright. 10.0 Tsotsi. South African Oscar-winning drama, with Presley Chweneyagae. 11.40 Phil Collins: Going Back. The singer performs a selection of his favourite Motown hits. TCM 7.05pm Eight Legged Freaks. Comedy horror, starring David Arquette. 9.0 Ghost Ship. Horror, starring Gabriel Byrne. 10.40 Soldier. Sci-ﬁ action thriller, starring Kurt Russell. Listeners’ views. 4.55 (FM) The Listening Project. Members of the public share intimate conversations. 5.0 (FM) PM. 5.57 (LW) Test Match Special. England v West Indies. 5.57 (FM) Weather 6.0 Six O’Clock News 6.30 The Now Show. New series. With Jon Holmes, John Finnemore, Mitch Benn and Pippa Evans. 7.0 The Archers. Ben makes a horriﬁ c discovery. 7.15 Front Row. An interview with singer- songwriter Neil Young. 7.45 (LW) Chronicles Of Ait — The Saxon Stones. By Michael Butt. 7.45 (FM) Chronicles Of Ait — The Saxon Stones. By Michael Butt. 8.0 Any Questions? From the Northern Aldborough Festival in North Yorkshire. 8.50 A Point Of View. Reﬂ ections on a topical issue. 9.0 Honest Doubt: The History Of An Epic Struggle. Omnibus. 9.59 Weather 10.0 The World Tonight. 10.45 Book At Bedtime: Jubilee. By Shelley Harris. 11.0 A Good Read. With Maggie Aderin- Pocock and William Orbit. (R) 11.30 Jon Ronson On. The downside of leading a competitive life. Last in the series. (R) 11.55 The Listening Project. Members of the public share intimate conversations. 12.0 News And Weather 12.30 Book Of The Week: Strands. By Jean Sprackland, abridged by Miranda Davies. (R) 12.48 Shipping Forecast Radio 4 Extra Digital only 6.0 Charles Paris: Sicken And So Die 6.30 Seance On A Wet Afternoon 6.45 The Late Alfred Hitchcock Presents 7.0 Smelling Of Roses 7.30 Comic To Comic 8.0 The Navy Lark 8.30 The Burkiss Way 9.0 Are You From The Bugle? 9.30 Tickets Please 10.0 The Sea Wolf 11.0 The Closed Door 11.15 Black Roses: The Killing Of Sophie Lancaster 12.0 The Navy Lark 12.30 The Burkiss Way 1.0 Charles Paris: Sicken And So Die 1.30 Seance On A Wet Afternoon 1.45 The Late Alfred Hitchcock Presents 2.0 Abandoned Projects 2.15 This Sceptred Isle 2.30 The Suspicions Of Mr Whicher 2.45 How Shall I Tell The Dog? 3.0 The Sea Wolf 4.0 The 4 O’Clock Show 5.0 Millport 5.30 Smelling Of Roses 6.0 The Euphio Question 6.30 The Phantom Of The Opera 7.0 The Navy Lark 7.30 The Burkiss Way 8.0 Charles Paris: Sicken And So Die 8.30 Seance On A Wet Afternoon 8.45 The Late Alfred Hitchcock Presents 9.0 The Closed Door 9.15 Black Roses: The Killing Of Sophie Lancaster 10.0 Comedy Club: Comic To Comic 10.30 On The Hour 10.55 The Comedy Club Interview 11.0 Sorry About Last Night 11.30 The Cabaret Of Dr Caligari 12.0 The Euphio Question 12.30 The Phantom Of The Opera 1.0 Charles Paris: Sicken And So Die 1.30 Seance On A Wet Afternoon 1.45 The Late Alfred Hitchcock Presents 2.0 Are You From The Bugle? 2.30 Tickets Please 3.0 The Sea Wolf 4.0 The Closed Door 4.15 Black Roses: The Killing Of Sophie Lancaster 5.0 Millport 5.30 Smelling Of Roses World Service Digital and 198 kHz after R4 8.30 Business Daily 8.50 From Our Own Correspondent 9.0 News 9.06 HARDtalk 9.30 The Strand 9.50 Witness 10.0 World Update 11.0 World Brieﬁ ng 11.30 Science In Action 11.50 From Our Own Correspondent 12.0 World, Have Your Say 12.30 Business Daily 12.50 Sports News 1.0 News 1.06 HARDtalk 1.30 World Football 2.0 Newshour 3.0 World Brieﬁ ng 3.30 The Strand 3.50 From Our Own Correspondent 4.0 News 4.06 HARDtalk 4.30 More4 Special. England v West Indies. 12.04 (FM) You And Yours. 12.52 (FM) The Listening Project. Members of the public share intimate conversations. 12.57 (FM) Weather 1.0 (FM) The World At One. 1.45 (FM) Honest Doubt: The History Of An Epic Struggle. Richard Holloway explores the concept of free will. 2.0 (FM) The Archers. Amy goes too far. (R) 2.15 (FM) Afternoon Drama: People Don’t Do Such Things. By Ruth Rendell. 3.0 (FM) Gardeners’ Question Time. From Scampston Gardens in North Yorkshire. 3.45 (FM) Are You Inexperienced? New series. AL Kennedy discusses writing her latest book. 4.0 (FM) Last Word. Obituary series, with Matthew Bannister. 4.30 (FM) Feedback. 6.0pm Home And Away (R) (S) (AD) Liam tries to help Hayley beat her addiction. 6.30 5 News (S) 6.50pm Come Dine With Me (R) (S) A country castle is the ﬁ rst of four settings for West Yorkshire dinner parties. 6.0pm ER (R) Carter is arrested while trying to defend a patient. 7.0 Cricket On 5 (S) England vs West Indies. Mark Nicholas introduces highlights of the second day of the third Test at Edgbaston in Birmingham. 7.0pm The Apprentice: The Final (R) (S) The last four candidates endure a severe grilling during the interview task that decides who will set up in business with Alan Sugar. 7.0pm World News Today (S) 7.30 Rostropovich — The Genius Of The Cello (R) (S) The life and work of celebrated Russian cellist Mstislav Rostropovich, who died in 2007. 7.55 Grand Designs Australia (R) (S) An couple have ambitious plans to restore a 19th-century building on the Gold Coast, but soon realise that building from scratch might be more sensible. 7.0 House (R) While treating a builder injured in a fall, the doctor spots strange symptoms that are unrelated to the accident. 8.0 NCIS (R) (S) The funeral of a special agent in Los Angeles leads Shepard on a secret mission to ﬁ nish the business she began a decade earlier in Europe. 8.0 Snog, Marry, Avoid? (R) (S) Hosted by Ellie Taylor. 8.30 The Accidental Husband (Griﬃ n Dunne, 2008) (S) Dim romantic comedy with Uma Thurman, Colin Firth and Jeﬀ rey Dean Morgan. 8.0 Kingdom Of Plants With David Attenborough The naturalist examines the seasonal inﬂ uences on the plants at Kew Gardens and investigates some of the unusual fungi found there. 9.55 Great Movie Mistakes 2011: Not In 3D (R) (S) Robert Webb narrates this compilation of 2011’s movie mishaps. 9.0 Punk Britannia (S) Contributors including John Lydon, Paul Weller, Mick Jones, Pete Shelley and Siouxsie Sioux look back at the peak years of the punk era between 1976 and 1978. 9.0 Charlotte Gray (Gillian Armstrong, 2001) (S) (AD) Disappointing adaptation of Sebastian Faulks’s wartime novel about a British spy in France. Cate Blanchett and Billy Crudup star. 9.0 Blue Bloods (R) (S) (AD) Danny’s hunt for a policeman’s killer brings Henry back into contact with a former enemy. 11.0 Big Brother’s Bit On The Side (S) Emma Willis presents the live spin-oﬀ show. 11.15 Family Guy (R) (S) After Peter wins free petrol for a year he takes the family on a road trip. 11.35 Family Guy (R) (S) Peter brings home a new dog, causing Brian to leave. 11.30 Arena: Who Is Poly Styrene? (R) (S) A 1978 documentary in which the X-Ray Spex singer Poly Styrene, who died last year, talks about her childhood and her attitudes towards performing. 11.20 Coppers (R) (S) Cameras follow the staﬀ at the Medway custody suite in Gillingham, Kent, led by Custody Oﬃ cer Sergeant Sean O’Conner, who process up to 40 suspected criminals a day. 11.0 The Wire (S) Valchek is keen to get on with the Sobotka investigation, so he goes to the FBI. Ziggy’s deal with Glekas goes awry and Bodie is pleased with Stringer’s new supply of drugs. 10.0 Big Brother: Live Eviction (S) Brian Dowling presents the ﬁ rst eviction of the series. 10.0 EastEnders (R) (S) (AD) Kat is back at the Vic, and immediately forces Roxy to move out. 10.30 Russell Howard’s Good News Extra (S) The comedian looks at his favourite sports stories. 10.0 Punk Britannia At The BBC (S) Archive performances by Dr Feelgood, Eddie and the Hot Rods, Gang of Four, the Sex Pistols, the Clash, Buzzcocks, the Damned and Joy Division. 10.0 Awake (S) Britten tries to reason with a paranoid schizophrenic who has instigated a hostage situation at a mental hospital — but the case raises worrying questions about his own sanity. Sport Today 4.50 Witness 5.0 World Brieﬁ ng 5.30 World Business Report 6.0 World, Have Your Say 7.0 World Brieﬁ ng 7.30 One Planet 7.50 From Our Own Correspondent 8.0 News 8.06 HARDtalk 8.30 World Football 9.0 Newshour 10.0 World Brieﬁ ng 10.30 World Business Report 11.0 World Brieﬁ ng 11.30 The Strand 11.50 Sports News 12.0 World Brieﬁ ng 12.30 World Football 1.0 World Brieﬁ ng 1.30 World Business Report 1.50 From Our Own Correspondent 2.0 News 2.06 HARDtalk 2.30 World Football 3.0 The World Today 3.30 The Strand 3.50 Witness 4.0 News 4.06 Assignment 4.30 One Planet 4.50 From Our Own Correspondent 5.0 The World Today 5.20 Sports News 5.30 Global Business Siouxsie Sioux, Punk Britannia, BBC4 Zoolander, E4 Full TV listings For comprehensive programme details see the Guardian Guide every Saturday or go to tvlistings.guardian.co.uk/ 32 The Guardian 08.06.12 Puzzles On the web For tips and all manner of crossword debates go to guardian.co.uk/crosswords Medium. Fill in the grid so that each run of squares adds up to the total in the box above or to the left. Use only numbers 1-9, and never use a number more than once per run (a number may recur in the same row, in a separate run). Printable version at guardian. co.uk/kakuro A great range of puzzle books is available from Guardian Books. To order, visit guardianbooks.co.uk or call 0845 606 4232. 22 23 27 24 8 23 16 35 35 17 24 14 16 4 17 35 35 17 16 16 17 24 9 35 26 16 22 16 23 34 24 26 4 16 14 14 28 16 30 11 16 17 16 17 30 35 16 17 12 17 9 11 17 14 17 6 16 4 35 30 3 16 17 17 29 30 17 33 14 16 3 16 3 9 5 8 6 9 2 5 1 3 4 5 3 9 2 1 1 3 1 2 4 9 7 1 3 8 9 3 1 7 8 9 7 1 3 1 2 4 1 3 7 9 2 8 7 6 6 4 2 8 9 7 9 1 3 8 9 6 4 2 1 2 5 3 6 3 8 2 9 1 8 9 8 7 2 1 7 4 9 7 9 9 7 1 5 2 6 8 1 2 6 1 4 2 3 2 4 3 7 1 8 5 9 1 2 4 Doonesbury Garry Trudeau Solution no 1294 Kakuro no 1295 Sudoku no 2208 5 7 9 6 1 1 6 4 5 9 7 2 9 6 4 8 6 7 3 3 1 2 4 8 Hard. Fill the grid so that each row, column and 3x3 box contains the numbers 1-9. Printable version at guardian.co.uk/sudoku Stuck? For help call 0906 751 0036. Calls cost 77p a minute from a BT Landline. Calls from other networks may vary and mobiles will be considerably higher. Service supplied by ATS. Call 0844 836 9769 for customer service (charged at local rate, 2p a min from a BT landline). Free tough puzzles at www.puzzler.com/guardian 5 2 9 7 1 8 3 4 6 7 8 3 5 6 4 2 9 1 6 1 4 2 9 3 5 8 7 9 4 8 6 3 7 1 5 2 1 7 6 8 5 2 9 3 4 2 3 5 1 4 9 7 6 8 4 5 7 3 2 6 8 1 9 3 6 2 9 8 1 4 7 5 8 9 1 4 7 5 6 2 3 Solution to no 2207 Quick crossword no 13,130 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 Across 1 American whiskey (7) 8 Permanent building (7) 9 Inane (7) 10 Act of mimicry (4-3) 11 Rock debris (5) 13 Rookie (9) 15 Impediments (9) 18 Place of safety (5) 21 Abandon (7) 22 (Of beer) sold from the cask (7) 23 Beat oﬀ (7) 24 Make a ﬁ rm decision (7) Down 1 Enthusiasts (5) 2 Out and out (5) 3 Able to be broken down by bacteria (13) 4 Swiss-based multinational food company, founded 1905 (6) 5 Scissors with serrated cutting edges (7,6) 6 Loose robe, originally Japanese (6) 7 Be unbearably loud (6) 12 Inhibit (4) 14 Stratagem (4) 15 Rhodes Scholarship university (6) 16 Handwriting (6) 17 German songs for voice and piano (6) 19 Watch (5) 20 Saltpetre (5) Solution no 13,129 W H O L E M E A L B I A O U D G A U L C R E A M S O D A L L T F S O P L E A T A F E I N T P T R E C A L L S A L O M E A T A R I A G O S S I P P O I N T S E O R E F I T T E D E F T R L G M I G P I L L O R I E D A N O N S O I N N D S H O W I N G U P Stuck? For help call 0906 751 0039 or text GUARDIANQ followed by a space, the day and date the crossword appeared another space and the CLUE reference to 85010 (e.g GUARDIANQ Wednesday24 Down20). Calls cost 77p a minute from a BT Landline. Calls from other networks may vary and mobiles will be considerably higher. Texts cost 50p a clue plus standard network charges. Service supplied by ATS. Call 0844 836 9769 for customer service (charged at local rate, 2p a min from a BT landline). Want more? Access over 4,000 archive puzzles at guardian.co.uk/crossword. Buy all four Guardian quick crosswords books for only £20 inc UK p&p (save £7.96). Visit guardianbooks.co.uk or call 0330 333 6846.