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The Times Times 2 - 28 February 2018

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February 28 | 2018
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Little black d
Anna Murphy on the frocks that rocked Milan
Versace autumn/
winter 2018
2
1G T
Wednesday February 28 2018 | the times
times2
What I learnt
Chill out, you British
snowflakes — this
isn’t Apocalypse Snow
Carol Midgley
Y
PRESS ASSOCIATION
esterday morning
I went to my local
shop to find that
— yes — the worst
had happened. The
shelves were bare,
no newspapers had
arrived and a few
people, including the owner, stood
outside shaking their heads. “It’s the
snow,” they said. We all stood and
agreed it was indeed “the snow”.
Vans were a bit late with deliveries:
this was the apocalypse we had
dreaded and for which nationally
we’d been warned to “stock up”,
hence “crazed shoppers” panic-buying
bread and leaving stores pillaged,
almost as if they were idiots who will
believe any old hysterical crap.
Except that where I live there wasn’t
much snow. Yes, there was some on
the pavements and car roofs and at
one point I feared even having to
brush a couple of flakes off my trainers
(they just melted away — phew), but
the roads were clear, hence the lorries
roaring past quite happily. I know
some places copped for more snow
than others, but in many the major
weather event could be dealt with by
simply “wearing your big coat”.
But it is, of course, British law that
we overreact to and utterly fail to cope
with snow, cancelling trains, planes
and buses, closing schools and making
it the lead item on the news. Police
had to be called to a Co-op in Kent
after a fight broke out over a “selfish”
customer reportedly stockpiling milk.
A headteacher in Dagenham
yesterday banned his pupils from
touching the snow, presumably lest
they fall victim to that deadly
condition known as “slightly cold
fingers”. This was not as extreme as
the school in Great Yarmouth that in
2015 forbade children to even look at
the snow, pulling down the blinds to
make sure because, of course, gazing
at snow makes you bleed from the
eyes, then die.
In a way it is comfortingly familiar
that Brits never fail to conform to the
Stupid Snow Rules. The rules that
state, for example, that the second a
few flecks fall, thousands of people
take to social media to write, “It’s
sno-o-o-owing!” with a helpful picture,
perhaps in the assumption that their
fellow Britons don’t have windows or
eyes, the latter because some teacher
forgot to pull down the classroom
No to the
naked and
the dead
David Cameron’s son Ivan was born
with a neurological disorder that baffled
doctors. Now, he writes, genomic testing
can end the anguish of uncertainty
Put stupid
Stunt on
the C-list
blinds in winter 1987. The rules also
state that you must say, “Cold enough
for you?” to every person you meet
and that at least one person will make
speech marks in the air and say: “So
much for ‘global warming’, eh?”
Conversely there will also be those
adopting a “Call this cold? I remember
the Big Freeze of 1962/3” stance and
always one person who dons a
swimsuit, then jumps in the sea to get
their picture in the paper the next day.
They will always succeed. In northern
cities young women will continue to
go out in tiny dresses and six-inch
heels while wearing no coat because
what’s the point of wearing your best
frock then covering it up with a parka?
(We may call this the Jennifer
Lawrence subsection.)
Rail companies will cancel trains
for no apparent reason, blaming “the
snow” even when there is barely
enough to dust a cake. Could it be
because they were handed more
than £2 billion in compensation by
Network Rail between 2011 and 2017
for cancellations and delays caused by
“bad weather” and other disruption?
Two snowflakes falling on London
is, do remember, more newsworthy
than 6ft of the stuff anywhere else,
ever. And the people shrieking, “Will
winter NEVER END?” are the same
people who in four months’ time,
when the thermometer nudges 18C,
will be mopping their foreheads and
shrieking: “This is too hot for me.
This is silly-hot. Roll on, winter.”
Because the main rule of the
Stupid Snow Rules is that we never,
ever learn.
China has launched a
crackdown on funeral
strippers. Grieving
families are being
told not to pay young
women to waggle
their tits over the
coffin of the deceased,
thank you very much,
because it’s not on.
Yet this has become a
trend partly because it
symbolises fertility and
partly because it draws
a big crowd, which is
said to bring the dead
good fortune.
I suppose we have
rent-a-mourners here
to make the departed
James Stunt, the
ex-husband of Petra
Ecclestone, has
given an interview
to Tatler in which he
called his former
father-in-law, Bernie,
a “C-list celebrity”
and a “dwarf ”.
Strewing the family
laundry over eight
pages, he says that the
mother of his children
has “had a lobotomy
and gone to Jonestown”
and that his former
mother-in-law is “like
Lady Macbeth’’.
I know none of these
people, who may all be
ghastly, but two obvious
thoughts spring to
mind. 1) If Bernie
Ecclestone is C-list,
then what does that
make Stunt? And 2)
Isn’t it funny that you
can live in a £12 million
house off Eaton Square,
Belgravia, own 200 cars
and have a Picasso on
your wall, yet it still
can’t buy you a
molecule of class?
look more popular.
But given that it’s been
reported that these
strippers often saunter
into the crowd and
“rub men’s crotches”,
you do have to wonder
if the “good fortune”
being served here is
primarily the corpse’s.
P
icture this. The most
precious thing in the
world to you, your
newborn child, is deeply
unwell, suffering with
painful seizures. You
know that every time it
happens it could be
doing damage to their development.
They go through test after test, many
of them intrusive and painful.
Different treatments are tried, some
with excruciating and potentially
damaging side-effects. Huge efforts
are being made on your child’s behalf,
but no one knows exactly what is
wrong or how to make it right.
I know because I’ve been there. My
eldest son, Ivan, was born with what
we later found out was Ohtahara
syndrome, a neurological disorder so
rare that there was barely a diagnosis,
let alone a cure.
I will never forget the moment of
being told that he was likely to be
severely disabled. Sitting in the
doctor’s room. Trying to understand
the immensity of what is being
explained to you. All your hopes and
dreams about the life your child is
going to have and the realisation that
it’s not going to be like that. It’s a shock
and takes a huge amount of time to
get over it — but we did. We were all
devoted to Ivan and as a family we still
talk about him all the time today.
We were bowled over by the heroic
attempts of doctors and nurses to treat
and care for Ivan, but we were also
reminded of how little we know about
conditions such as epilepsy and some
of its rare syndromes.
When it came to the question of
having more children, my wife
Samantha and I were offered
something that was very much in its
infancy then: genetic counselling.
Because there was no certainty about
whether Ivan’s condition was inherited
or more of a one-off, we were given a
“blended probability” — 1 in 20 —
that any future children could have a
similar condition. Fortunately, we
went on to have three healthy
children, but very sadly lost Ivan in
2009. He was only six years old.
Epilepsy affects 1 in every 200
children. Of those, just 1 in 500 are
affected by Ohtahara. In other words,
there are only a handful of children in
the world who have it. However, rare
diseases aren’t all that rare. There are
an estimated 350 million people
around the world living with rare and
undiagnosed genetic disorders, more
than the number of people with cancer
and Aids combined.
Half of all sufferers of rare diseases
are children and nearly a third won’t
live to see their fifth birthday. I think of
all the parents around the world going
through what we did — not only the
anguish of seeing their child suffering,
but also the frustration at the lack of
diagnoses, treatments and knowledge
about what has happened and why.
In many cases the doctor is unlikely
to have seen a patient with the same
condition before. They are left to rely
on intuition and antiquated tests to
determine which of the 7,000 rare
diseases may be affecting the child.
If a sample is sent out for genetic
testing — looking for abnormal
chromosomes or mutations — it’s
often done for one disease at a time.
A few weeks later the results return.
If they are negative, another test for
a different disease is ordered. This
gruelling process can go on for
months, even years. If a correct
diagnosis is eventually made it is
often too late to undo critical damage
that has already been done to the
child’s development.
Yet we are on the brink of a huge
breakthrough. We have access to the
comprehensive technology of clinical
whole genome sequencing. Instead of
looking at individual chromosomes,
we can sequence the whole genome,
determining the unique ordering of
three billion letters found in almost
every cell in a person’s body. Rather
than testing one disease at a time,
this process simultaneously can test
We were devoted
to Ivan and we
still talk about
him all the time
for all rare diseases, 80 per cent of
which are genetically based. All it
takes is a blood test. It is that simple.
If my experience as a father showed
me how little we knew about rare
diseases, becoming prime minister at a
time when these enormous leaps were
being made opened my eyes to how
much we could know. The visits I
made, the research I read and the
meetings I had with top experts,
including the chief medical officer and
chief scientist — who were huge
influences on my thinking — pointed
to how unlocking our DNA could
transform healthcare.
The UK has a proud heritage in this
area of science. It was James Watson
and Francis Crick who 65 years ago
discovered the twisted-ladder
structure of DNA, one of the major
advances in human history. And
Frederick Sanger made the key
breakthrough that led to successful
genome sequencing.
I wanted us to remain at the
forefront of this revolution by helping
to turn this important breakthrough
into something that could deliver better
tests, drugs and care for patients.
In 2013 I set up Genomics England to
run the 100,000 Genomes Project,
which aims to sequence 100,000
genomes from NHS patients with
the times | Wednesday February 28 2018
3
1G T
times2
from our son’s rare disease
The lowdown
Will.i.am
Celebrities are lazy.
Now that’s a bit unfair. Think of all
the good work they do to keep us
common folk entertained: pregnancy
reveals, Instagram scandals, family
underwear campaigns . . .
I don’t think you can judge all
celebrities by what the Kardashian
clan get up to.
Of course I can. It’s called the
Kardashian index.
Did you make that up?
Yes.
It’s a wonder you get paid.
Anyway, this is not about the
Kardashians. It’s about
Will.i.am and his new book.
He wrote a book? That’s not lazy.
No, no — he “co-penned” it.
Ah. What’s it called?
WaR: Wizards and Robots.
*rolls eyes*
It’s a young-adult novel set in a
dystopian future.
*rolls eyes again*
a rare disease and their families,
as well as patients with cancer. In
2014 Genomics England formed a
partnership with Illumina, in California,
which I am delighted to be working
with now that I have left office.
Illumina’s work is incredible. One
study that has particular poignancy
for me was conducted at Rady’s
Children’s Hospital in San Diego
and documented a comparison
between two children, one
born before Illumina’s rapid
genomic sequencing had been
implemented there and one
born afterwards.
It took six weeks to diagnose
the first baby, born in 2015,
with a variant of Ohtahara
syndrome. In the wait for a
diagnosis the baby sustained
severe neurological damage.
A year later another
newborn baby started
experiencing seizures. Analysis
of her genome revealed that
she had the same variant of
Ohtahara, enabling doctors to
give her targeted medication
immediately. Today she shows
no signs of significant
developmental harm.
Today is World Rare Diseasee
Day, which gives us an opportunity to
celebrate the strides that are being
made. It is also a chance to redouble
our commitment to making progress
and to overcoming the specific
challenges that we face with this issue.
First we need to continue to drive
down the costs involved. In 2007 you
would pay $1 million to sequence a
human genome. By 2014 Illumina had
reduced that cost to $1,000. Now all
efforts are on getting that number
down to $100.
David Cameron with
his son Ivan in 2004
and, below, in 2007 with
his wife, Samantha, and
their children Ivan,
Nancy and Elwen
Next we must focus on what
happens after diagnosis. Currently,
only 5 per cent of rare diseases have
an approved treatment. More needs
to be done to increase the incentives
for pharmaceutical companies to
research diseases that affect only a few
people and therefore may not be
viewed as cost-effective.
Then there is the much needed
support that accompanies the science.
Today I am opening a school
run by Young Epilepsy.
ru
Research
conducted by the
R
charity
reveals the impact
ch
that
th epilepsy and related
conditions
have on families,
co
with
w parents — particularly
mothers
— more likely to be
m
diagnosed
with depression
di
and
an anxiety. That is not
surprising
at all. There are
su
very
ve few things that compare
with
w watching your precious
child
ch having seizure after
seizure
and feeling powerless
se
to do anything about it.
The word “transformational”
is hugely overused, but on
this
th occasion it is justified.
Over
the next decade
O
genomics
should transform
ge
the
th way we do medicine and
healthcare.
healthca Of course, that is not
to say that it will always supply
solutions. In many cases genomic
sequencing can help to understand a
condition for which there are only
limited treatment options.
I think of one particular example:
a child who was suffering from a
degenerative neurological condition
that no amount of testing could
diagnose. She and her family endured
nine whole years struggling for
answers, but when Illumina sequenced
her genome it was revealed that she
had a mutation in a gene, which
allowed iron to accumulate in her
brain. Here the treatment options
were limited.
Yet what this did was provide
answers where there had been only
questions, reassurance where there had
been only uncertainty. For patients and
families going through the pain of a
serious illness like this those things
cannot be overestimated.
Indeed, that’s what genomics does: it
gives us hope. And it allows us to
picture a different scene: one in which
every child in paediatric intensive care
can receive a quick diagnosis. No more
unnecessary testing, futile surgeries or
ineffective treatments. No more
parents burdened with the anguish of
uncertainty. Instead, information that
prevents children from further harm
— prolonging, even saving, their lives.
That should be our goal: every child in
paediatric intensive care having that
simple yet vital genomics test.
It is so important — and urgent —
that we continue to seize
developments like this. I think back to
all the treatments that we went
through with Ivan and all the help that
we had — and we really did have the
best of the best. One of the great
things about our National Health
Service is that it is there for you 24/7
and it does include specialist centres
such as Great Ormond Street
Hospital. When you’re there you know
you’re getting the finest in the world
— and it is a huge comfort.
But that will only stay true if we
keep up with modern technology and
keep investing in these advances, such
as genomics. Beating these diseases is
within our grasp, and it is something
to which I am wholly committed.
You know, we really haven’t got to
the eye-rolling part of this story yet.
Really? What could be worse than a
combination of The Hunger Games,
Harry Potter and Transformers?
Clearly not much to someone who
was until very recently a young
adult themselves.
First, don’t be rude, and second,
anyone with half a brain cell would
know that wizards, robots and
dystopia just don’t gel.
You sound angrier than the fans
who got signed copies of the book.
I didn’t know Will.i.am had enough
fans who would want signed copies
of his book.
Well, he does. And he got a robot
to sign them. Hence: lazy.
The cheek! But let me guess, it was in
keeping with the theme of his book?
That’s very astute of you —
and correct.
Did you ever see JK Rowling getting
her books signed by a house elf?
Probably
ly not.
Becausee they
don’t . . .
Don’t try
ry to tell
me that they
don’t exist.
xist.
Hannah
h
Rogers
4
1G T
Wednesday February 28 2018 | the times
fashion
Scary monsters, super chic:
NECKLACES
Giorgio Armani
PROTECTIVE
CLOTHING
Max Mara
HEADSCARVES
Gucci
CALF BOOTS
Fendi
ALIENS
Moncler
From baby dragons
to bag drones: the
Italian catwalk was
wildly outlandish.
By Anna Murphy
and Hattie Crisell
S
tranger things were going
on this week in Milan, the
city that built its fashion
credentials on predictable
classics such as Gucci’s
snaffle loafer and Max
Mara’s camel coat.
We are not just talking
bad taste. Prada has been playing for
years with ideas about what its head
honcho, Miuccia Prada, calls “racchio”,
or ugly. We are talking full-blown
extra-terrestrial. Prada tapped Lil
Miquela — a virtual influencer (sic)
with 619,000 followers — to do an
Instagram takeover for its show.
But that was nothing. At Gucci
two models — or rather “cyborgs”,
according to the creative director,
Alessandro Michele — had silicon
renderings of their own head tucked
nonchalantly under one arm. Another
carried what appeared to be a
neonatal dragon.
Moschino mannequins in Jackie O
tailoring were painted blue and green.
Even cheek by jowl with the evermore face-lifted front row, this stuff
looked weird. And Dolce & Gabbana
launched its new handbag design
literally by drone.
Michele has made his name at
Gucci with some pretty off-the-wall
accessories since he took over in 2015,
but he hit a whole new level for next
season. I can’t imagine the Real
Housewives of anywhere joining the
waiting list for a baby basilisk any time
soon. Although one is probably en
route to Daenerys Targaryen. As for
that Moschino body paint, those
looking for an entrée to the Blue Man
Group should sign up pronto. And
when it comes to bag-carrying drones,
it looks to be only a matter of time:
Jeff Bezos has been threatening
Amazon Prime Air for a while.
What was it all about? Gucci’s
Michele was gnomic. “This is an
era of big change. We are all
Dr Frankensteins. Now we have to
decide what we want to be.”
At a time when ideas about luxury
have changed dramatically, and the
most successful
brands are
knocking out
pricey hoodies like
there is no tomorrow,
it’s not that surprising
that designers have
come over all
existential.
But not airy-fairy.
We continue to live
on planet It-bag and,
increasingly, It-trainer. And
what are both but a kind of
real-world special effect, a
one-stop way to lift a look? AM
The aliens have landed
It was at its most other at Gucci and
Moschino, but the weirdness was
widespread. Prada was part space
station, part power station, with
DayGlo hues, scuba suiting, sci-fi
logos, and boots designed for wading
through ectoplasm. A Moncler
collaboration with the Valentino
designer Pierpaolo Piccioli delivered
silhouette-obliterating duvet capes:
close encounters of the feather-filled
kind. Even at Giorgio Armani, usually
ground zero for sensible chic, mirrored
shades and giant fur bath caps
rendered models not quite of
this world. AM
Big trousers
We may talk about the trends
of the season, but in reality
many of them have a slower
ascendance; they sneak into the
collective consciousness, then
suddenly hit tipping point. Thus
the loose-legged silhouette that
has been gradually usurping skinny
jeans in recent years is now evident in
flares and puddle-swishers
everywhere: at Antonio Berardi (in
shimmering taffeta), Missoni (1970s
Manhattan meets Marrakesh),
Roberto Cavalli (black leather with
side splits), Salvatore Ferragamo
(bright suedes) and Tommy Hilfiger
(high-waisted tracksuit bottoms).
Loose trousers give a breezier, more
elegant effect — wear something
close-fitting on top if you’re worried
about bulk. HC
Me-too-ish
Remember when you wore black to
fade into the background? Now it’s a
political statement. But how to avoid it
also being a boring one? Designers
looked for points of difference. At
Prada black bustier dresses came in a
quilted nylon over-printed with a neon
nightscape, part Hollywood Strip, part
Hawkins, Indiana. Dolce’s signature
black frocks had putti buttons, or
the times | Wednesday February 28 2018
5
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fashion
Milan is out of this world
COVER: JASON LLOYD-EVANS. BELOW:
GETTY IMAGES; REX FEATURES
DRONE CANDY
Dolce & Gabbana
in everything from lace to
velvet. Versace favoured
football scarves, Salvatore
Ferragamo and Tod’s
hoodies. AM
ME-TOO-ISH
Prada
GLOVES
Sportmax
Necklaces
Fashion has been obsessed
with earrings for some
time, and there will still be
plenty of resin and crystal
BIG TROUSERS
danglers to buy this year.
Salvatore Ferragamo
Yet in Milan attention
seemed to have shifted to
statement necklaces.
Giorgio Armani showed
long tassels round the neck
and rows of chunky jewels.
At Roberto Cavalli the
models wore thick chains. HC
ATHLEISURE
Tod’s and
Tommy Hilfiger
Headscarves
similarly angelic
embroidery. Alberta
Ferretti
channelled a
F
glammed-up cowgirl
feel,
the black chiffon
f
highlighted with gold and
h
given heft with ten-gallon
hats.
At Emporio Armani
h
black came pinstriped,
logoed and splashed
with
w green. Versace
brought
sexy back with
b
asymmetric
LBDs. AM
as
Calf boots
Not quite ankle, not quite knee,
autumn’s new wave of boots are
coming to a shin near you. Emporio
Armani and Fendi had cowboyinspired styles, while those at Tod’s
were slouchy and made in luxurious
suedes and shearlings. Autumn’s
smartest innovation comes from
Jimmy Choo — stiletto ankle boots
that, with the help of a buckle under
the sole, transform into an over-theknee style. HC
Protective clothing
It’s scary out there, that seems to be
the less than encouraging message for
autumn/winter. And chilly too. There
were countless takes on the cover-up
and/or the cosy. Fendi stacked quilted
capelets on top
of wool coats,
Salvatore Ferragamo slipped a duvet
add-on under theirs and also offered
vast jumper dresses. Max Mara’s
camel coats came with blanket-style
fringing, the better to signal their —
you guessed it — comfort-blanket
potential. At Missoni models carried
blankets and an extra woolly, just
in case their Doctor Who scarves
and jumpers weren’t doing the job.
Prada’s translucent topcoat was
in translucent black tulle, with
debutante bow at the back, but
the hi-vis neoprene was straight
out of Z for Zachariah. AM
Gloves
You may remember Nicole Kidman
and Margot Robbie appearing on the
January Vogue cover in marigolds;
now gloves have become the accessory
du choix at the Milan shows. At
Sportmax they were sturdy leather
ski gloves: one model wore them with
a silk evening dress and bare arms.
At Versace there were neon fingers
peeping out of coats in contrasting
colours. Emilio Pucci and Vivetta
showed gloves that reached well above
the elbow. Perhaps it’s The Crown
effect: the glove-as-adornment could
be on its way back. HC
The fashion industry is quick to note
the needs of wealthy customers, and
that means offering options for the
modest dresser — particularly when
it comes to covering her head. The
result is a plethora of headscarves,
from Gucci, where they were
elasticated round the face and joined
at the chin with a brooch, to Versace,
where they were brightly printed. The
The real
va-va-voomery
came from the
models, Gigi and
Bella Hadid
Athleisure
Anyone who
thought we had reached
peak track pant a while back
was mistaken. Sports-inspired
clothing wasn’t so much a
sideshow in Milan, but the main
attraction, especially at Tommy
Hilfiger — in town for one night
only after putting on a show in
London last season. The American
brand conjured up a racetrack, with
Formula One cars in the pits. But the
real va-va-voomery came from the
models, Gigi and Bella Hadid et al,
clad in Motocross leathers and
Lycra. Dolce & Gabbana turned
track pants dolce vita, with ten options
hijab-wearing American Halima Aden
is one of the most discussed models of
the moment; she wore glossy black
leather at Max Mara finished off with
a matching silk scarf. HC
Drone candy
Arm candy is so last season. It’s all
about drone candy now. Dolce &
Gabbana launched its new handbag,
the heart-adorned Devotion, via
aerial bot. The brand has always
been good at bending the catwalk
rules, but this took things not only
to a new level, but a new altitude.
Could it be the beginning of fashion’s
own Robot Wars? AM
Instagram: @timesfashiondesk
6
1G T
fashion
Wednesday February 28 2018 | the times
Shearling jacket,
£959.20,
whistles.com
Simple, smart and far from
dull — my perfect suit
I
t’s the simple things in life that
make me happy wardrobe-wise. I
can’t be doing with complication.
I don’t want to take 30 minutes to
get dressed in the morning. Ten
will do. But I don’t want things
to be too simple. If I can find a
classic piece with a tweak to lift
it, that is my true happy place. Because
I want to look interesting, not boring.
And I love a bit of embellishment.
That’s why this trouser suit by the
Scandi brand Stine Goya — black and,
at the same time, so much more — is
close to perfection for me (£330 for the
jacket, available on Friday, £237 for the
trousers; stinegoya.com). It forms part
of a fabulous first foray into suiting by
a label that has built a following for its
colour, its pattern, its floaty frocks. For
anything but tailoring in other words.
“I wanted to make suiting playful,”
says the 39-year-old model-turneddesigner who gave her name to the
brand. “I wanted to make a suit that is
not over-the-top, but still feels special.”
Job definitively done. Ditto with the
lovely fringe-edged midnight Rise
jacket (£260, trousers £213), which also
comes in a gorgeous scarlet that
probably dictates a more avant-garde
office environment. And not forgetting
the fringing-covered York jacket, in
midnight again, which merits nothing
less than a dancefloor and your very
own spotlight (£284). The brand has a
pop-up at the Fenwick London branch
for six weeks from March 12 which —
like the website — certainly merits
further investigation.
Goya worked in London with the
British brands Eley Kishimoto and the
now-defunct Jonathan Saunders before
returning to her native Denmark to set
up her own proposition. “I felt that we
were missing a brand here that was
playful, artistic,” she says. “The Scandi
look was very minimal, with no colour.”
Given her original statement of
intent, is it perverse to focus on her
brand’s more dialled-back dimension,
its tailoring? Possibly, though I would
argue that Goya’s ability to make
corner office-appropriate separates
look playful is the ultimate vindication
of those founding objectives.
The designer posits the theory
that the Scandinavian approach to
fashion was related to the region’s
minimalist track record in furniture
design. “There was that tradition of
clean lines, so people dressed that way
too. Today people dress differently,
more colourfully, more eclectically,”
she says. For what it’s worth, Scandi
street-stylers are among the most
colourful and as a result the most
followed in the world.
It stands to reason that a fashion
sensibility can be informed by wider
aspects of a country or region. It
seems to me no accident that the
permatrend for streetwear-inspired
pieces should have captured the global
Who says classic tailoring
has to be the boring option
for work, asks Anna Murphy
£149,
Top, £149, and trousers,
m
meandem.co
Jacket, stinegoya.com.
Below: earrings,
dior.com
imagination at a time when America
has such a hold over the international
consciousness. It’s interesting to think
what may happen fashion-wise should
China become global top dog, or — if
Robert Bickers’s book Out of China:
How the Chinese Ended the Era of
Western Domination is to be believed
— now that it already has. Will the
21st century ultimately prove to be the
era of the cheongsam?
Girl with a bee earring
Luxury brands are all about global
domination, about creating items —
usually accessories — that will have as
much appeal in Abuja as Aberdeen.
Usually it’s handbags and shoes with
which they have most success.
Chanel’s 2.55 is the ultimate example
of the former, Gucci’s loafers the latter.
With jewellery it’s harder, but —
given a lower price point if it’s costume
— potentially even more lucrative.
Dior’s Tribales earrings, which have
been around for five years, make the
grade. The originals — still
available — were double pearls,
a smaller one in front of the
lobe, a bigger one behind and
below (£270, dior.com).
I also love this newer tweak, in
which the front spot is taken by a
bee instead (£290).
Instagram: @annagmurphy
I
would love to consider myself
a chic and minimalist dresser,
interested only in fine navy
jumpers and exceptionally cut
white shirts, but time and again
my attention veers towards the
flamboyant like a child towards
the Chupa Chups stand. Wave
a leopard-print coat or a pair of gold
trousers in my peripheral vision and
I’ll be with you like a shot, making
cooing noises as though you’ve
handed me a puppy. In the category
of flashy fashion, one colour rules
supreme: I am, of course, talking
about red.
There’s a reason that they use it for
stop signs, fire engines and the carpets
on which celebrities pose and preen.
Red is unignorable. Right now it’s
pushier than ever, cropping up
everywhere from the awards shows
and the catwalks to a Marks & Spencer
near you (in the last case, a slinky satin
blouse with bracelet sleeves, £25,
marksandspencer.com). In the spring
shows Givenchy used the colour as
a sort of punctuation throughout the
collection, culminating in a hot pleated
dress with a frill collar; Victoria
Beckham also worked with breezy red
fabrics throughout.
But how to wear it if you’re not
looking for front-page coverage so
much as trying to get through an
average weekend? You don’t have to be
a raging extrovert to want people to
Blazer, £405, shirt
, £230,
trousers, £230,
tarajarmon.com
know that you’re in the room. Red has
always been the colour of va-va-voom
— a little bit Jessica Rabbit, a little bit
Gentlemen Prefer Blondes — but the
present way of wearing it is more
about a sporty block of colour than
anything overtly sexy.
For the aforementioned posers, the
trend is to wear it neck to ankle —
Gigi Hadid and Anna Dello Russo are
masters of this. At the recent fashion
weeks front rowers have been doing
the same and adding white shoes and
accessories — a bit much for some
of us civilians, perhaps, but it does
feel appropriately bright and
refreshing for spring.
The other great colour pairing of
our times is red and pink. Technically
this might be a clash, yet it works so
well, removing the simpering quality
that pink can have on its own. Certain
retailers can help you out with pieces
that use both colours so that you don’t
have to experiment with combinations
yourself. Kitri has a merino-wool polo
A red frock is a
very ‘all eyes on
me’ choice for a
birthday party
the times | Wednesday February 28 2018
7
1G T
fashion
What the fashion
crowd wore to
the shows
Leopard print
Corduroy
White jeans
Faux-fur scarf, £150, charlottesimone.com
Dress, £295, rixo.co.uk
Stop! It’s time
to wear red
(£415, matchesfashion.com),
or Marella’s double-breasted
wool-blend trench coat (£415,
johnlewis.com).
Hoop earrings
Personally, I’m on the hunt
for a red dress, and the best
candidates I’ve uncovered so far are
Ganni’s Emery wrap with a black
leaf print, or the long shirtdress in
the same fabric (£150 and £190,
ganni.com); Karen Millen’s ballerinaesque full-skirted frock (£190,
karenmillen.com); and Rixo’s belted,
mid-length Joanne dress (£295,
rixo.co.uk). A red frock is a very
Wandler
all-eyes-on-me choice for a birthday
bags
party — yours or someone else’s,
though don’t quote me on the latter.
If being a full-blown scarlet woman
isn’t for you, there are purchases to be
neck divided diagonally into red and
had on a more discreet scale — such
mango.com). You could also splurge
pink halves (it’s being restocked this
as Kate Sheridan’s rather beautiful
on a statement red coat that will
week at £69, kitristudio.com), while
cross-body bag in vegetable-tanned
see you through the next few winters
Marni offers a swankier cashmere
leather, now reduced from £205 to
— such as Whistles’ punkish
version (£650, net-a-porter.com). At
£125 (youngbritishdesigners.com), or
shearling Erica style, with a cosy
Uterqüe, see the hip-length red jacket
Isabel Marant’s Fezzy red loafers
high collar (reduced from £1,199 to
with a pink belt (£180) and the fishtail
(£430, matchesfashion.com). Charlotte
£959.20, whistles.com), Weekend
red skirt with a contrasting pink ruffle
Simone specialises in fur scarves
Max Mara’s jolly Teatino raincoat
(this flamenco shape will be a trend
(real for £200, or faux for £150) and
right through next winter; £120,
has a two-tone version in red and
both uterque.com).
pink (charlottesimone.com). Add
If pink is not for you, Mango’s
a siren-flash of red like this to an
russet blazer and trousers are
otherwise low-key outfit and people
lightweight and chic (and again
will undoubtedly notice — yet
trouser suits will be all the rage for
you can deny to your grave being
Le Specs sunglasses
at least another year; jacket
an attention-seeker.
£430, Isabel Marant at matchesfashion.com
£59.99 and trousers £35.99,
Instagram: @hattiecrisell
Try just a flash of scarlet or go
head-to-toe — and bask in the
attention, says Hattie Crisell
Checked coats
8
1G T
Wednesday February 28 2018 | the times
arts
Before this record
my attitude was,
‘I’m going to get
lost, do drugs, die’
The Strokes guitarist Albert Hammond Jr talks to
Will Hodgkinson about his OCD, kicking heroin and
a new, healthier life — married with a solo career
A
s you may expect
from the most
stylish member of
the Strokes, Albert
Hammond Jr arrives
at our interview
in the bar of a
Manchester hotel
looking very sharp indeed. His rosered suit is accessorised by a tie pin on
a white shirt. This turns out to be mere
daywear: that evening he will change
into a rock’n’roll-friendly outfit of
white jeans and black leather jacket
to perform songs from his new wavetinged solo album, Francis Trouble,
which explores, among other things,
the guitarist’s recent discovery that he
had a stillborn twin. You might assume
that he just wants to look good. As it
turns out, there are more complex
reasons for his dapper leanings.
“I’m a very neat person,” says
Hammond, who does resemble the
kind of man who would be thrown
into crisis by a malfunctioning trouser
press. “I started dressing differently
as a way of attracting the people
My mind
talks too
much and
I don’t
know how
to stop it
I wanted to meet, but at the same time
my neatness is a form of OCD. I’m
learning to deal with it. I’m like this
because my mind talks too much and
I don’t know how to stop it. The first
time I took heroin, I could focus. I was
self-medicating my inner voice.”
On the face of it, Albert Hammond
Jr appears to have led a gilded
existence. The son of the Gibraltar
songwriter of the same name whose
soft rock standards The Air That
I Breathe and When I Need You have
soundtracked a million slow dances
at weddings, Hammond Jr went to
private schools in Switzerland and
Los Angeles before hitting Manhattan
at 18 armed with his dad’s credit card.
There he met a former school friend,
Julian Casablancas, and formed the
Strokes. Within two years this gang of
raffish, privileged dudes had made one
of the most perfectly realised debut
albums to date. Released in the wake
of 9/11, Is This It marked the Strokes
out as the last great New York band
before the cultural baton was handed
to hip-hop, pop and R&B.
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the times | Wednesday February 28 2018
9
1G T
AUTUMN DE WILDE
Out of all the Strokes, Hammond
seemed like the one you would
most like to hang out with in a Lower
East Side dive bar. Casablancas,
the singer, was elusive, and the
guitarist Nick Valensi a little too
pleased with his model looks, but
you could imagine having fun with
Hammond. You certainly wouldn’t
have expected him to be the one that
fell into a vortex of drug misery.
arts
“That’s because I always wanted to
be in the Beatles,” says Hammond
of his happy-go-lucky demeanour.
“I grew up watching films of the
Beatles clowning around. Then the
Strokes would go and do an interview
and the other guys would be acting all
moody and serious, and I would be
thinking, ‘If you’re not going to have
fun now, when will you?’ It doesn’t
matter what moment you’re in if you
can’t enjoy the moment.”
In the early days
ys at
least, being a Stroke
oke
was fun. As
documented in
Lizzy Goodman’s
hilariously
gossipy oral
history of the
Noughties
music scene,
Meet Me in the
Bathroom, the
Strokes exuded
an air of
impermeable cool,l,
prowling the city’s’s
bars and clubs, picking
cking
up women, playing
ng
increasingly buzzyy shows and
somehow finding the time to write
a handful of garage rock classics. Then
Is This It came out and turned them
into a phenomenon.
“It was too much to adapt to,”
Hammond says. “We were kids,
building a spaceship in our backyard.
All of a sudden there are jets on that
spaceship and it is taking us to the
moon and we’re going, ‘No! Wait! We
haven’t finished building it yet!’ We
were lost in space.”
Initially Hammond was getting
drunk and smoking joints after gigs, as
young men in happening rock bands
have always done, but after a tour of
Japan in 2007 he crossed the line into
heroin. Casablancas has blamed the
songwriter and fellow former narcotics
enthusiast Ryan Adams for leading his
friend down a dark road, which Adams
denies, but Hammond takes full
responsibility for his mistakes.
“People love drugs because real life
is, like, this sucks, that’s not working,
and going to the grocery store is
boring,” he says. “Drugs bring a sense
of wonderment to everything.
Then you ge
get addicted,
and by th
the time you
are injecting
you
inje
have to ask
why you are
physically
ph
mutilating
m
yourself.
There
y
must
m be
something
s
about
yourself
a
that
th you hate.
Honestly,
Ho
before
befo this
record
recor my
attitude
attitud was, ‘I’m
going to get
g lost, do
drugs
drugs and die.’
di ”
Hammond’s addiction
ad
reached a height during the
t recording
of the Strokes’ 2009 album Angles,
when his mother and the other band
members forced him into rehab.
Now clean, and living with his Polish
wife, Justyna Sroka, in upstate New
York, he says that making Francis
Trouble has forced him to address a
few uncomfortable truths. Alongside
taking stock of what being the
surviving twin means, the album looks
at politicians’ shaky notions of truth
(Far Away Truth) and the damage that
Hammond’s flirtatious tendencies
have caused to past relationships
(Rocky’s Late Night). With shades of
The
Th Strokes: Nick
Valensi, Fabrizio
Moretti, Albert
Hammond Jr, Julian
Casablancas and
Nikolai Fraiture.
Below left: Hammond
with his father, the
songwriter Albert
Hammond, and mother,
Claudia Fernández
Oscars
prediction night
Join us tomorrow
at an exclusive
Times+ event with
our film critics Kevin
Maher and Ed Potton,
who will be discussing
the Academy Awards’
nominated films
and sharing their
predictions. Followed
by a screening of the
Oscar-nominated
Darkest Hour.
To book, go to
mytimesplus.co.uk
the literate, economical style
th
of
o Lou Reed and Jonathan
Richman,
the songwriting is
R
crafted
throughout. It makes you
c
wonder:
did he catch some tips
w
from
his dad?
fr
“He’s one of those people
who
w is good at what they do, but
don’t
know how to teach it,”
d
Hammond
says of his paternal
H
namesake.
“When I was young
n
he
h was just my dad and I didn’t
think
about what he did for a job,
th
especially
as I wanted to be a
e
scientist.
When I was older I kept
s
what
he did separate, perhaps
w
out
o of competition. I remember
once
when I was 16 going to this
o
garage
studio to record my song,
g
and
a he and his friend took over
and
a completely ruined my music.
After
that I was, like, ‘F*** this.’
A
Mum
was the supportive one. My
M
dad
d just said, ‘Make sure you have
a back-up plan.’ ”
Hammond never did find that
back-up
plan. As he runs through
b
key musical moments in his life, from
discovering the Ohio indie band
Guided by Voices at 16 and realising
that he could do something similar to
getting stoned and lying on the floor
of his New York apartment with two
Music opened
me . . . but success
gave me a role
I couldn’t escape
speakers by his ears while losing
himself in the self-titled 1998 album
by Elliott Smith, he developed a love
affair with music first and tried to
work out his place in it afterwards.
Francis Trouble is Hammond’s fourth
solo album — his brightest and most
accessible work yet — but it is also a
fresh start.
“That Elliott Smith record
contained everything I wanted to
be in,” he says. “Music opened me,
and connected me, and completely
changed the way I looked at the
world. Songs I loved made me
walk different, talk different, think
different. I wanted to be a part of it,
but then success gave me a role [as
guitarist of the Strokes] that I couldn’t
escape. To really do something good
as a solo artist you have to make
mistakes, and not like who you are,
and take risks. It took me until almost
38 to realise that.”
As he gets up to leave, Hammond
cracks a smile. “What can I say? I’m
a late bloomer.”
Francis Trouble is out on Red Bull
Records on March 9
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1G T
Wednesday February 28 2018 | the times
television & radio
Below stairs with the staff of five-star palaces
James
Jackson
TV review
100 Years Younger
in 21 Days
ITV
{{(((
Amazing Hotels
BBC Two
{{{{(
I
f The Real Marigold Hotel, Gone to
Pot: American Road Trip and their
ilk have taught us anything, except
that Miriam Margolyes and Bobby
George will do anything for a free
holiday, it’s that celebrity disinhibition
equals TV gold. Thus 100 Years
Younger in 21 Days, in which eight
craggy, florid faces had their every
wrinkle exposed at a sunny Sardinian
retreat before getting down to the
real TV business of colonic irrigation
and being tortured by snails.
Radio Choice
Catherine Nixey
You’re Doing It Wrong
Radio 4, 9.30am
You can see it in the
language of job adverts.
These regularly say that
they want people who
are passionate about
their work and committed
to it. Yet should one
really be passionate about
one’s job? Adam Buxton
asks if our relationship
with our work is a bit
wrong. Why should the
thing that earns us money
demand the language and
emotion once used for love
affairs? Why should a job
not be just, well, a job?
Must we, asks Buxton,
love our work?
Riot Girls:
The Good Terrorist
Radio 4, 10.40am
The Riot Girls series’
celebration of women’s
drama, the second in as
many years, continues this
week with an adaptation of
Doris Lessing’s play about
revolutionaries in a London
squat. On the one hand you
feel pleased that there are
good dramas by good
female writers being aired.
On the other hand: Riot
Girls? Really? Girls? This
is by Lessing, a Nobel
laureate. If we had a play
by the Nobel laureate
Günter Grass would
we call him a boy?
Take another look at the title: this is
not a show short of ambition. Indeed,
one year younger in 21 days would be
some kind of achievement for the
celebrities here who, as a bonus for
playing ball, had their “actual” body,
brain and face age revealed by some
kind of health technology. So, for
example, 67-year-old Russell Grant’s
fleshy body was shown to have an
actual age of 85, while after a lifetime
of foetid junk food, Gogglebox’s Sandra
Martin, 55, was revealed to have a body
age of 69 and brain age of 86.
Given the number of times he’s
flushed himself down the toilet, the
Happy Mondays singer Shaun Ryder
wasn’t actually looking bad for 55. He
looks only 64 (his atrophied brain was
73). “I’ve given up, hmm, opiates,
temazepam, Valium, crack,” he
explained. “I still have booze.”
It takes a certain level of celebrity for
this increasingly worn genre to work.
The participants must be recognisable
enough to the common couch potato,
but not have a shred of vanity. Being
beyond an age where they don’t care
a jot what people think of them helps.
Which is why 91-year-old June Brown
off EastEnders stole the show, even
from the lurching Ryder. Watching
Dot Cotton lithely stretch and bend
into yoga poses was a startling,
impressive spectacle, her secret to a
long life on 60 cigarettes a day being
Tibetan exercise and laughter. Yet not
Radio 1
FM: 96.7-99.8 MHz
6.30am The Radio 1 Breakfast Show with
Nick Grimshaw 10.00 Clara Amfo 12.45pm
Newsbeat 1.00 Scott Mills 4.00 Greg James
& Adele Roberts 5.45 Newsbeat 6.00 Greg
James & Adele Roberts 7.00 Annie Mac 9.00
The 8th with Charlie Sloth 11.00 Huw
Stephens 1.00am Benji B 3.00 Radio 1
Comedy: Niki and Sammy’s Peachy Podcast
4.00 Early Breakfast with Jordan North
Radio 2
FM: 88-90.2 MHz
6.30am Chris Evans 9.30 Ken Bruce 12.00
Jeremy Vine 2.00pm Steve Wright 5.00
Simon Mayo 7.00 The Folk Show with Mark
Radcliffe. Kings of the South Seas in session
at the Salford studio 8.00 Jo Whiley 10.00
Brad Paisley: This is Country Music. The
singer-songwriter showcases country classics
old and new 11.00 Old Grey Whistle Test 40.
Mark Knopfler recalls the rise of Dire Straits
(r) 12.00 Pick of the Pops (r) 2.00am Radio
2 Playlists: Country Playlist 3.00 Radio 2
Playlist: Easy 4.00 Radio 2 Playlist:
Radio 2 Rocks 5.00 Vanessa Feltz
Radio 3
FM: 90.2-92.4 MHz
6.30am Breakfast
Petroc Trelawny presents Radio 3’s classical
breakfast show. Including 7.00, 8.00 News.
7.30, 8.30 News Headlines
9.00 Essential Classics
The best in classical music with Suzy Klein,
and Evelyn Glennie reveals the cultural
influences that have inspired her career
12.00 Composer of the Week:
Richard Strauss (1864-1949)
A look at the effect the First World War had
on Strauss’s life and music, focusing on two
operas written during these challenging
times. Strauss (Amor — Brentano Lieder,
Op 68; Die Frau ohne Schatten — excerpt;
Ophelia Lieder, Op 67; and Four
Symphonic Interludes — Intermezzo)
1.00pm News
1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert
Tom Redmond continues a week of
Lunchtime Concerts recorded at the 2017
Aldeburgh Festival in Suffolk. Mark Padmore
(tenor), Roger Vignoles (piano), Jörg
Widmann (clarinet), and the Belcea Quartet
perform. Purcell real Britten (A Morning
Hymn; and An Evening Hymn); Jörg Widmann
(Three Shadow Dances for solo clarinet);
and Mozart (Clarinet Quintet, K581) (r)
Giles Coren visited the five-star Brando resort in French Polynesia
2.00 Live Afternoon Concert
Tom Redmond presents as the BBC
Philharmonic and their Principal Guest
conductor Ben Gernon perform live
from their home in MediaCity, Salford.
Beethoven (Overture: Leonore No 2); Mozart
(Symphony No 31 in D — Paris); Debussy
orch Colin Matthews (La terrasse des
audience du clair de lune; and Feux d’artifice);
Bernard Rands (Concerto for English Horn
and Orchestra — first UK performance);
and Anna Clyne (Masquerade)
3.30 Choral Evensong
Recorded in Durham Cathedral Chapter House
with the Durham Cathedral Consort of
Singers. Introit: Super flumina babylonis
(Palestrina). Responses: Shephard. First
Lesson: Job 1 vv 1-22. Canticles: Norwich
Canticles (John McCabe). Second Lesson:
Luke 21 v 34 — 22 v 6. Anthem: Ne irascaris
Domine (Byrd). Hymn: Jesu, Grant Me This,
I Pray (Song 13). Organ Voluntary: Voluntary
for My Lady Nevell (Byrd). Director:
Francesca Massey. Organist: Daniel Cook
4.30 New Generation Artists
The Amatis Piano Trio, featuring the
violinist Lea Hausmann, the cellist Samuel
Shepherd and the pianist Mengjie Han,
perform Ravel (Trio in A minor)
5.00 In Tune
Sean Rafferty’s guests include the pianist
Jeremy Denk, who performs live before a
recital at Milton Court, and the Rautio Piano
Trio also play live. Including 5.00, 6.00 News
7.00 In Tune Mixtape
An eclectic non-stop mix of music
7.30 Live Radio 3 in Concert
David Hill conducts the Bournemouth
Symphony Chorus and Orchestra, with Lucy
Crowe (soprano), Benjamin Hulett (tenor),
and Christopher Purves (bass), live from
the Lighthouse in Poole. Presented by
Martin Handley. Haydn (Creation)
10.00 Free Thinking
The archaeologist Francis Pryor talks about a
lifetime of building vistas of our history and
prehistory through the evidence of pottery
shards, holes in the mud and broken bones.
The palaeo-archaeologist Paul Pettitt
explains why darkness informed a critical
component in the development of the brain
10.45 The Essay:
Are You Paying Attention?
Madeleine Bunting presents her third
essay on attention in the digital age
11.00 Late Junction
Max Reinhardt introduces a ritualistic
drum piece from Papua New Guinea,
thought to commune with the spirits
12.30am Through the Night
Radio 4
FM: 92.4-94.6 MHz LW: 198kHz MW: 720 kHz
5.30am-8.30 (LW) Test Match Special:
New Zealand v England Commentary
on the second of five ODIs, held at the
Bay Oval in Mount Maunganui
5.30 News Briefing
5.43 Prayer for the Day
5.45 Farming Today
5.58 Tweet of the Day
6.00 Today
8.30 (LW) Yesterday in Parliament
9.00 Only Artists
Mark Haddon meets the painter
Tai Shan Schierenberg (1/5)
9.30 You’re Doing it Wrong
Adam Buxton explores the world of work.
See Radio Choice (1/5)
9.45 (LW) Daily Service
9.45 Book of the Week:
The Line Becomes a River
Francisco Cantu’s memoir about working for
the US-Mexican Border Patrol (3/5)
10.00 Woman’s Hour
With Jane Garvey. Including at 10.41 the 15
Minute Drama: Sarah Daniels’ dramatisation
of The Good Terrorist by Doris Lessing.
See Radio Choice (8/10)
10.56 The Listening Project
A conversation between mother and son as
they reflect on his experience of stammering
11.00 The Skipped Beat
Investigating the significance of the
heartbeat to culture and identity (r)
11.30 State of the Nations
The comedian Elis James tours the four
nations of the UK (4/4) (r)
12.01pm (LW) Shipping Forecast
12.04 The Curious Cases
of Rutherford & Fry
The pair investigate the discovery of
dinosaurs, right up to the present day (3/5)
12.15 You and Yours
1.00 The World at One
1.45 British Socialism: The Grand Tour
Anne McElvoy examines how Ellen Wilkinson
went from Communism to the Jarrow March
to a seat in the Cabinet (8/10)
2.00 The Archers (r)
2.15 Drama: An Instinct for Kindness
Chris Larner’s powerful, personal account of
his ex-wife Allyson’s struggle with multiple
sclerosis, and the difficult decision she made
to end her life. Starring Chris Larner,
Caroline Catz and Carolyn Pickles
3.00 Money Box Live
3.30 Inside Health (r)
4.00 Thinking Allowed
4.30 The Media Show
even Brown was laughing about the
snail treatment — having molluscs
slide over one’s face for an hour — or
the morning espressos, aka coffee
enemas. Nor even the viewers perhaps.
The close-up of Roy Walker’s face as
he evacuated his bowel of coffee was
frankly unedifying.
One marvels instead at the Giles
Coren plan for ageing: balancing fine
dining at pricey restaurants with TV
trips to luxury resorts for Amazing
Hotels: Life Beyond the Lobby, coffee
enemas entirely optional.
As before, the idea of this returning
series is that the Times writer and his
co-presenter, Monica Galetti, get
“stuck in” with the hotel workers to
see how five-star palaces are actually
run. They started at the paradisal
Brando resort on the Tetiaroa island
in French Polynesia (an atoll once
owned by Marlon Brando, who
loved to stay there until his weight
threatened to sink it). This involved
Coren helping a crane operator and a
coconut picker — non-arduous tasks
that he countered contentedly with
pina coladas and a whale-watching
excursion. As jobs go, not too shabby.
Villas at the Brando cost up to
£11,000 a night, so while the show was
a welcome eyebath of tropical, whitesand loveliness, I’m not sure I wasn’t
left simply depressed knowing that I’ll
never be able to afford to visit the place.
james.jackson@thetimes.co.uk
5.00 PM
5.54 (LW) Shipping Forecast
6.00 Six O’Clock News
6.30 Bridget Christie’s Utopia
Bridget focuses on money and what it
would be like to be super rich (4/4)
7.00 The Archers
Adam fears for the future
7.15 Front Row
Arts programme
7.45 Riot Girls: The Good Terrorist
By Doris Lessing (8/10)
8.00 The Moral Maze
Michael Buerk and guests debate the
morality of international aid (4/8)
8.45 Lent Talks
Theo Hobson explores performance art as
a way of expressing penitence (2/6)
9.00 Costing the Earth
Ellen Husain meets the people fighting
to save the Great Barrier Reef (r)
9.30 Only Artists (1/5) (r)
10.00 The World Tonight
With Ritula Shah
10.45 Book at Bedtime: A Portrait of
the Artist as a Young Man
By James Joyce (8/10)
11.00 Domestic Science
A combination of maths, science and comedy
with Festival of the Spoken Nerd (2/4)
11.15 John Kearns
Comic vignette (3/4) (r)
11.30 Today in Parliament
12.00 News and Weather
12.30am Book of the Week:
The Line Becomes a River (r)
12.48 Shipping Forecast
1.00 As BBC World Service
Radio 4 Extra
Digital only
8.00am The Navy Lark 8.30 Round the
Horne 9.00 Many a Slip 9.30 The Right Time
10.00 Home Front Omnibus 11.00 The
Interview 11.15 Motor Flight 12.00 The
Navy Lark 12.30pm Round the Horne 1.00
Burnt 1.30 The Nose School 2.00 Biggles
Flies North 2.15 A History of the Future
2.30 Tales of the City: The Days of Anna
Madrigal 2.45 A Confession 3.00 Home
Front Omnibus 4.00 Many a Slip 4.30 The
Right Time 5.00 The Architects 5.30 Bridget
Christie’s Utopia 6.00 Orbiter X 6.30 The
Tingle Factor 7.00 The Navy Lark. Comedy
with Leslie Phillips and Jon Pertwee 7.30
Round the Horne. Comedy with Kenneth
Horne. From 1965 8.00 Burnt. Starring
Dennis Waterman 8.30 The Nose School. The
art of perfume-making. First aired in 2005
9.00 The Interview. Vicki Liddelle reads
Scissors, Paper, Stone by Shiromi Pinto 9.15
Motor Flight. In 1907, American writers take
a car journey across France 10.00 Comedy
Club: Bridget Christie’s Utopia. Bridget
explores the countryside to see if it will
make her happier 10.30 Welcome to Our
Village, Please Invade Carefully. Uljabaan
prepares a banquet for his superior officer
11.00 Danny Robins Music Therapy.
The DJ writes a new town anthem for
Middlesbrough and lends a hand to a
love-lorn pensioner 11.30 The Remains of
Foley and McColl. Comedy with Sean Foley
Radio 5 Live
MW: 693, 909
6.00am 5 Live Breakfast 10.00 The Emma
Barnett Show with Anna Foster 1.00pm
Afternoon Edition 4.00 5 Live Drive.
With Sarah Brett and Tony Livesey
7.00 5 Live Sport. Mark Chapman presents
sports news interviews and features
10.30 Sam Walker 1.00am Up All Night
5.00 Reports 5.15 Wake Up to Money
talkSPORT
MW: 1053, 1089 kHz
6.00am The Alan Brazil Sports Breakfast
with Danny Kelly and David Ginola
10.00 Jim White 1.00pm Hawksbee and
Delaney 4.00 Adrian Durham and Darren
Gough 7.00 Kick-off 10.00 Sports Bar
1.00am Extra Time with Adam Catterall
6 Music
Digital only
7.00am Nemone 10.00 Lauren Laverne
1.00pm Mark Radcliffe 4.00 Steve Lamacq
7.00 Marc Riley. With a live session by
Once & Future Band 9.00 Gideon Coe 12.00
6 Music Recommends with Mary Anne Hobbs
1.00am The First Time with Kelis 2.00
Classic Singles 2.30 6 Music Live Hour
3.30 6 Music’s Jukebox 5.00 Chris Hawkins
Classic FM
FM: 100-102 MHz
6.00am More Music Breakfast 9.00 John
Suchet 1.00pm Anne-Marie Minhall 5.00
Classic FM Drive 7.00 Smooth Classics 8.00
The Full Works Concert. Jane Jones presents.
Delius (In a Summer Garden); Paul Reade
(The Victorian Kitchen Garden: Suite); Debbie
Wiseman (The Glorious Garden); Grainger
(Paraphrase on Tchaikovsky’s Flower Waltz);
and Puccini: (Crisantemi) 10.00 Smooth
Classics 1.00am Sam Pittis
the times | Wednesday February 28 2018
11
1G T
IKIN YUM
Concert
ORA Singers
LSO St Luke’s, EC1
Concert
The Brook Street Band
St John’s Smith Square, SW1
I
I
{{{{(
{{{((
t’s hard to fault the vocal qualities
of ORA Singers, the choral
ensemble formed in 2014 by Suzi
Digby. They sail through the air
with an almost astonishing purity
of tone, perfect balance and
togetherness — ideal weapons for
their chosen repertoire, Renaissance
masterpieces and the new fruits of
contemporary composers. Stage
presentation is equally nifty as they
elegantly split into separate groups,
form a big circle, or sing while
descending spiral staircases, all with
atmospheric lighting.
This concert, devoted to music
honouring the Virgin Mary, revealed
just one deficiency: knowing when to
stop. Counting the encore and the
plainchants from the Vespers service
for the Feast of the Assumption, the
tally of items reached 25. Even the
most devoted lover of choral music
may be forgiven for getting fatigued.
The mountainous pile at least
stemmed from excellent reasons: the
wealth of ORA’s choral commissions
(we heard 13, with four premieres)
and the continuing gift of today’s
composers, in an age of noise, for
building on Renaissance glories and
exploiting the beauties of the human
voice. Among the premieres, Francisco
Coll’s Stella impressed with its
emotional range, volatile dynamics
and transitory grinding harmonies.
Alexander Campkin’s haunting Ave
Regina Caelorum and two atmospheric
pieces by Sven-David Sandstrom
followed smoother paths to ecstasy.
From the slightly older pieces, the
nonagenarian John Joubert’s Reflection
on the Plainchant Antiphon in Odorem
proved wonderfully virile, despite
being anchored to one of the
programme’s sillier texts, while Julian
Wachner’s Regina Coeli stood out from
the European pack with its American
sonic engineering. As for the very,
very old, they all seemed winners to
me — and so did Digby’s 18 singers.
Geoff Brown
Pía Laborde-Noguez plays a woman in the throes of ugly separation in Falk Richter’s annoying play
Don’t bank on this one
This play about
doomed love
and the failure
of capitalism is
maddening and
superficial, says
Sam Marlowe
Theatre
Trust
Gate Theatre, W11
{((((
Four stars for Frost/Nixon
at the Crucible, Sheffield
First Night in the main paper
Pop
Jake Bugg
London
Palladium, W1
{{{{(
artsfirst night
B
eware the dangers of early
hype. Jake Bugg was only 17
when his distinctively reedy
tone and tales of a misspent
Nottingham youth led to him
being hailed as a Bob Dylan of the
council estates. Add to this an early
hit called Lightning Bolt sharing the
same insistent delivery as Dylan’s
Subterranean Homesick Blues and Bugg
seemed a little too good to be true.
Once the initial excitement over this
anomaly of a young star doing music
more commonly associated with his
grandparents’ generation died down,
there was the inevitable backlash. Five
years later this solo acoustic set at the
London Palladium showed Bugg, right,
to be a nuanced performer following
his own path whether that chimed
with a wider audience or not.
There was nothing by way of
stagecraft beyond a single spotlight,
I
t’s the end of the affair. You feel
used, humiliated, broken, and
you wonder if anything you
thought you had between you
was real. That’s disorientating
enough when it’s your love you’re
losing. But when you’ve been in bed
with capitalism all your life, and it
suddenly lets you down and leaves you
with nothing, can you trust anything,
or anyone, again?
This play by the German writer Falk
Richter draws an analogy between
private and public, aligning the abuses,
exploitation and compromises of
a disintegrating personal relationship
with economic collapse, the false
promises of consumerism and political
betrayal. It’s a formless, chaotic stream
of words and imagery, originally
performed as dance-theatre. The
director Jude Christian turns it into
a free-flowing, multimedia drama that
is sparky, yet maddening. She piles
on layers of imaginative conceit and
smart humour — but it’s so arch and
superficial that it’s easy to disengage.
At one end of the long, narrow space
is a simulacrum of a tiny bedsit, the
kind that costs a fortune to rent in
London’s insane housing market.
As splinters of stories are enacted
or recited into microphones, there’s
a sense that we’re eavesdropping, the
words bleeding through thin urban
and Bugg said little and moved less,
yet an hour and a half in his company
flew by. “You’re all so quiet it’s making
me nervous,” confessed Bugg, who is
presumably more used to rowdy
festival mobs than respectful theatre
audiences. The silence allowed us to
appreciate his guitar playing, which
was bold and percussive, but
augmented with deft blues
runs that can only be the
product of many hours
spent in monkish practice.
Early favourites such as
Country Song (used on a
beer ad) and Two Fingers
got the biggest cheers,
but later songs such as
the Otis Redding-like
soul ballad Waiting —
which Bugg recorded
as a duet with Miley
Cyrus’s little sister
walls. Christian is narrator and
witness, while Pía Laborde-Noguez
and Zephryn Taitte are a couple —
or perhaps various couples — in the
throes of ugly separation. There are
breakfast-table recriminations, a
squabble in an art gallery.
Taitte attempts to woo his partner
back with a soulful serenade and
a jar of Nutella. On video they face
off on The Jeremy Kyle Show. There’s
also an audience-participatory
impromptu Mandarin lesson —
handy for the globalised future —
and an airline scene in which we’re
equipped with blankets and eye masks
while a child’s voice mournfully
condemns Brexit.
In one especially striking sequence
Laborde-Noguez, mid-beauty routine,
blithely promises the lover she has
repeatedly robbed and lied to that
she’ll change if he’ll just cough up
a few billion quid more — like
a duplicitous politician, or a failing
bank demanding a bailout.
The piece is so wilfully devoid of
shape or momentum, though, that
it becomes infuriating, and by the
time we arrived at a lengthy yoga
routine accompanied by droning
non sequiturs of vague existential
despair, I was losing the will to live.
Playful — but punishing.
Box office: 020 7229 0706, to Mar 17
n any art or sport, there’s room for
the popular and the unusual. Take
the Winter Olympics. Downhill
skiing? Pretty mainstream. Curling
and the skeleton? Acquired tastes.
Let’s turn to baroque music. Handel
and Bach? Headliners. Georg Muffat?
Unquestionably niche.
Yet he is important enough for the
Brook Street Band period-instrument
ensemble to celebrate his music with
a Muffat Festival. You may well ask
why — I did. Granted, the crowd
huddled in a chilly St John’s Smith
Square was a respectable size, but
surely Muffat isn’t a money-spinner.
Nor was there a particular anniversary
to mark, though as luck would have it,
the cellist and festival curator Tatty
Theo explained, the opening concert
fell on the 314th anniversary of
Muffat’s death. Refreshingly, this was
seemingly a programme born of
artistic curiosity, pure and simple.
It was all very enjoyable and stylish,
even if nothing reached exalted gold
medal heights. The case for Muffat, if
one is needed, is that his music paved
the way for Corelli, Handel and Bach.
Born in the French Alps, he studied in
France with “the most experienced
masters of this art of music” — very
possibly including Louis XIV’s court
composer, Lully. Muffat is credited
Muffat’s music
paved the way for
Handel and Bach
with being the composer who first
brought Gallic style to Germany.
The Brook Street Band, on lively
form and in varying line-ups, placed
him in the context of the German
Violin School. We heard Muffat in
both sombre mood and buoyantly
dancing, with violins brightly glinting,
mellow violas and a warm continuo.
Krieger’s Trio Sonata was workaday,
but three short sonatas by Schmelzer
were delicious and rich. And there was
a flash of humour in Biber’s Sonata
Representativa, in which the violinist
imitates cuckoo, nightingale and quail.
Rebecca Franks
Noah, oddly — displayed an artist
inhabiting old-fashioned material that
he clearly loves.
A cover of Neil Young’s Old Man
showed where Bugg’s tastes lie, while
a finale of Lightning Bolt got everyone
in the crowd on their feet; not that
easy for those who were
attracted to Bugg by his
senior-friendly style. “I only play
music because I like it,” he told
us. “I didn’t ever think I’d be
doing it in front of people.” Five
years ago that statement would
have seemed disingenuous.
Now, at the grand old age of 23,
Bugg seems like a man with this
kind of rootsy, blues-based
music in his blood.
Will Hodgkinson
Royal Concert Hall,
Nottingham, Fri, then touring
to March 13. jakebugg.com
12
1G T
Wednesday February 28 2018 | the times
television & radio
Viewing Guide
Joe Clay
The Assassination
of Gianni Versace
BBC Two, 9pm
Ryan Murphy
follows up
The People v
OJ Simpson
with a nine-part “true
crime” drama, written
by Tom Rob Smith
(London Spy), telling
Early
Top
pick
the story of the death
of the international
fashion mogul Gianni
Versace, who was
murdered by Andrew
Cunanan. Versace
was the fifth victim
of Cunanan’s killing
spree, shot dead on the
doorstep of his Miami
mansion in July 1997.
The drama is based on
a book, Vulgar Favours
by Maureen Orth,
which, according to
a statement from the
Versace family, was
not authorised, which
in their view means
“this TV series should
only be considered as a
work of fiction”. The
People v OJ Simpson
was also criticised for
its inaccuracies, but
that didn’t stop it from
being a quality drama
— it was nominated for
22 Emmys, winning
nine. The Assassination
of Gianni Versace isn’t
in quite the same class,
but it is stylish and
compelling, so don’t let
its habit of playing fast
and loose with the
truth put you off. It
opens with the brutal
murder, then heads
back to 1990, with
Cunanan (Darren
Criss) meeting Versace
(Édgar Ramírez) in
a nightclub and later
for post-opera drinks
(Versace’s family deny
a link between Versace
and his killer). Then
we’re back to the crime
scene and the efforts to
save Versace’s life and
the hunt for Cunanan.
It properly gets going
with the introduction of
Penélope Cruz as
Donatella Versace,
who arrives at the
family compound to
establish control of
her brother’s empire.
The World’s Most
Extraordinary
Homes
BBC Two, 8pm
The Beeb’s answer to
Grand Designs returns,
with Piers Taylor
and Caroline Quentin
getting the keys to
some of the most
incredible houses. After
a nosey round on their
own, the duo meet the
owners and architects
to discuss the
construction and
resulting home. For the
first episode they are in
Portugal, where they
visit a property that is
built on old farming
terraces and uses an
innovative snake design
to blend in with the
surrounding vineyards.
Another is a house in a
pine forest shaped like
“a letter from some
unknown alphabet”.
BBC One
BBC Two
ITV
Channel 4
Channel 5
6.00am Breakfast 9.15 Murder, Mystery and My Family.
Jeremy Dein and Sasha Wass examine the murder of two
policemen (AD) 10.00 Homes Under the Hammer.
Properties in Derby, Kent and Darlington (r) 11.00
Wanted Down Under Revisited. Nicki Chapman catches up
with Viv and Darren Stirk, who five years earlier spent a
trial week in New Zealand 11.45 Caught Red Handed.
A pair of bickering burglars ram a vehicle into a building
12.15pm Bargain Hunt. From the Westpoint Arena in
Exeter (r) (AD) 1.00 BBC News at One; Weather 1.30
BBC Regional News; Weather 1.45 Doctors. Rob gets
a series of phone calls at the station (AD) 2.15
Shakespeare & Hathaway: Private Investigators. Frank
and Lu race against the clock (AD) 3.00 Escape to the
Country. City-dwelling families, couples and individuals
set out to find their ideal rural retreats (r) (AD) 3.45 Get
Away for Winter. An Essex woman who wants to swap
the cold UK for the sunshine of Majorca (AD) 4.30
Antiques Road Trip. Paul Laidlaw and Natasha Raskin
head to the historic city of York (r) 5.15 Pointless. Quiz
show hosted by Alexander Armstrong (r) 6.00 BBC News
at Six; Weather 6.30 BBC Regional News; Weather
6.00am Caught Red Handed (r) 6.30 Get Away for
Winter (r) (AD) 7.15 Wanted Down Under Revisited (r)
8.00 Sign Zone: Great British Railway Journeys (r) (AD,
SL) 8.30 Grand Tours of Scotland’s Lochs (r) (SL) 9.00
Victoria Derbyshire 11.00 BBC Newsroom Live 11.30
Daily Politics 1.00pm Perfection (r) 1.45 Plan It, Build It
(r) (AD) 2.15 Yes Chef (r) 3.00 A Place to Call Home. Ash
Park prepares for a visit from the Prime Minister and his
wife in support of George’s election campaign, and James
begins to learn how to relax in public with Harry (r) 3.50
More Creatures Great and Small. Vet Megan treats a dog
with a life-threatening condition (r) 4.20 Caribbean with
Simon Reeve. Simon visits Nicaragua and Honduras on the
last leg of his journey, before finishing by spending time
with young Jamaicans who have rejected gang life. Last in
the series (r) (AD) 5.20 Flog It! Paul Martin and the team
head to Weston Park on the borders of Shropshire and
Staffordshire, where a collection of First and Second
World War memorabilia rouses interest (r) 6.00
Eggheads. Quiz show presented by Jeremy Vine (r)
6.30 Great British Railway Journeys. Michael Portillo
travels to Chapeltown and Doncaster (r) (AD)
6.00am Good Morning Britain. A lively mix of news and
current affairs, plus health, entertainment and lifestyle
features 8.30 Lorraine. Entertainment, current affairs
and fashion news, as well as showbiz stories, cooking
and gossip 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show. Studio chat
show 10.30 This Morning. Phillip Schofield and Holly
Willoughby present chat and lifestyle features, including
a look at the stories making the newspaper headlines and
a recipe in the kitchen 12.30pm Loose Women. Another
helping of topical studio discussion from a female
perspective, featuring interviews with famous faces
1.30 ITV News; Weather 2.00 James Martin’s American
Adventure. The chef heads towards Louisiana’s
swamplands, before travelling to the nearby city of
Lafayette, where he visits the family run smokehouse,
Johnson’s Boucaniere (AD) 3.00 Tenable. Five friends
from Wales answer questions based on top 10 lists,
then try to score a perfect 10 in the final round.
Quiz hosted by Warwick Davis 4.00 Tipping Point. Ben
Shephard hosts the arcade-themed quiz show (r) 5.00
The Chase. Bradley Walsh presents the quiz show 6.00
Regional News; Weather 6.30 ITV News; Weather
6.00am Countdown (r) 6.45 3rd Rock from the Sun (r)
(AD) 7.35 Everybody Loves Raymond (r) 8.30 Frasier (r)
(AD) 10.05 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA.
A Mexican restaurant in West Nyack, New York (r) 11.00
Undercover Boss USA. The CEO of a property management
company goes undercover in his own organisation (r)
12.00 Channel 4 News Summary 12.05pm Come Dine
with Me. Four hosts compete to host the best dinner
party in Chelmsford and Brentwood (r) 1.05 Posh
Pawnbrokers. An emerald ring catches the eyes of
pawnbroking brothers Charlie and Patrick (r) 2.10
Countdown. With Myleene Klass in Dictionary Corner 3.00
A Place in the Sun: Summer Sun. A holiday home in the
Spanish region of La Marina Alta (r) 4.00 A New Life in
the Sun. Two vineyard owners from Hereford test out
their culinary skills 5.00 Four in a Bed. The competition
heads to 32 Townhouse in Pembrokeshire, Wales 5.30
Extreme Cake Makers. A sugarcraft specialist is asked to
make a three-foot tall fairy cake for a toddler’s birthday
(r) 6.00 The Simpsons. Another trilogy of Hallowe’eninspired stories (r) (AD) 6.30 Hollyoaks. Darcy ups
her plan to get her hands on Jack’s money (AD)
6.00am Milkshake! 9.15 The Wright Stuff. Matthew
Wright and his guests talk about the issues of the day
11.15 Can’t Pay? We’ll Take It Away. Officers Gary and
Cona chase up nearly £50,000 in unpaid rent, and Del and
Max bid to collect more than £10,000 from a beauty salon
for a disgruntled former employee 12.10pm 5 News
Lunchtime 12.15 GPs: Behind Closed Doors. The doctors
at Balham Park Surgery treat patients with heart-related
concerns, including Gerry, who visits Nurse Sara Moloney
for a post-heart operation check-up (r) (AD) 1.10 Access
1.15 Home and Away (AD) 1.45 Neighbours (AD) 2.20
NCIS: Conspiracy to Murder. Having identified the mole in
their ranks, the agents are forced to rely on information
from questionable sources as they try to prevent a
criminal stealing government secrets (r) (AD) 3.20
FILM: Left for Dead (TVM, 2014) A detective
develops amnesia, but as she tries to recall her past, she
discovers her husband and daughter may be in danger.
Thriller with Elisabeth Röhm 5.00 5 News at 5 5.30
Neighbours. Izzy drives a wedge between Karl and Susan
(r) (AD) 6.00 Home and Away. Brody comes up with a
plan to buy back Salt (r) (AD) 6.30 5 News Tonight
Get a
Armistead Maupin – How I wrote Tales of the City
“I should like to spend my
whole life reading it...”
Northanger Abbey
Paula Byrne Celebrated houses of fiction
Edward Allen Marianne Moore, and more
Nabeelah Jaffer Islam and Britishness
Libby Purves Tinder of the 1940s
SEPTEMBER 15 2017 No. 5972
972
n
www.the-tls.co.uk
the-tls.co
THE TIMES LITERARY
ARY SUPPLEM
SU
ENT
Patrick J. Murray Montaigne’s social network
Jamie Fisher Angry like Mailer
Charlotte Shane Provocations of feminism
Samuel Earle Never getting bored of Barthes
SEPTEMBER 29 2017 No. 5974
n
www.the-tls.co.uk
THE TIMES LITERARY SUPPLEMENT
Laura Freeman Dress like a writer
Colin Grant Lost voices of immigration
Anne McElvoy The passion of Merkel
Krishan Kumar On statues and Nazis
UK £3.50 USA $8.99
SEPTEMBER 22 2017 No. 5973
UK £3
n
www.the-tls.co.uk
THE TIMES LITERARY SUPPLEMENT
Tales of addiction
Inspirations of Dante
Rowan Williams
Ian Thomson
Wandering, wondering
Eric J. Iannelli
Terri Apter
UK £3.50 USA $8.99
£20
Waterstones
Gift Card when
you subscribe
to the TLS
Annette Kobak on women and the Grand Tour
Jan Marsh on Ruskin in Europe
7PM
7.00 Sea Cities People who live and work
around Britain’s ports and rivers,
beginning in Plymouth in the south
west, where a local entrepreneur
juggles fishing, boat trips and a cafe
during a busy summer (1/5) (r)
7.00 Emmerdale The smoke rising from
Robert’s scrapyard causes Joe to lose a
client, so he vows to get even, while
Zak confronts his feelings (AD)
7.30 Coronation Street Bethany suffers a
harrowing experience at work, Zeedan
pushes Kate and Sophie together, and
Summer confronts Billy (AD)
7.00 Channel 4 News
7.00 Can’t Pay? We’ll Take It Away Paul
Bohill and Steve Pinner evict a couple
who owe five months’ rent on a flat,
and later hit a snag when they try to
seize a taxi over a £3,000 debt. Steve
Wood finds out that unpaid rent is not
the only problem when he attempts
to repossess a corner shop (r)
8.00 Holby City Roxanna pitches an
experimental treatment that could help
Oliver recover. Meanwhile, Dominic
tries to help a deeply worried Lofty
plan for Sheilagh’s future, and it
remains to be seen whether Frieda will
continue to help Jac when her mentor’s
pain reaches breaking point (AD)
8.00 The World’s Most Extraordinary
Homes New series. The architect Piers
Taylor and the actress and property
enthusiast Caroline Quentin return to
explore more unusual homes in
different locations of the world,
starting with four properties in
Portugal. See Viewing Guide (AD)
8.00 Britain’s Brightest Family
Two families compete for a place
in the quarter-finals (AD)
8.00 The Supervet New series.
A jackahuahua puppy is in need of
emergency spinal surgery after being
attacked by another dog in the park,
and an excitable Labrador requires
elbow replacement surgery, which will
result in a long and difficult road to
recovery. See Viewing Guide (1/6)
8.00 GPs: Behind Closed Doors A regular
patient suffering from bulimia visits
the surgery, and a man struggling with
breathing issues and a tight chest is
treated by the doctors. Other patients
including a woman dealing with
depression and anxiety (AD)
9.00 Shetland Jimmy questions Donna
about the shocking DNA results, Alison
arrives in Norway in search of Andreas
Hagan, and an unexpected twist
leads Perez and Tosh into the murky
world of the Norwegian far-right.
See Viewing Guide (3/6) (AD)
9.00 The Assassination of Gianni
Versace: American Crime Story
New series. Fact-based crime drama
focusing on the murder of fashion
designer Gianni Versace by serial killer
Andrew Cunanan. Starring Édgar
Ramírez. See Viewing Guide (1/9) (AD)
9.50 Live at the Apollo Romesh
Ranganathan compères an evening of
stand-up at London’s Hammersmith
Apollo, performing himself and
introducing routines by guests Jason
Byrne and Stewart Francis (4/7) (r)
10.30 Newsnight Presented by Kirsty Wark
9.00 The £1 Houses: Britain’s Cheapest
Street The buyers rush to finish
renovations in time for Christmas,
but building regulations prevent the
properties from being legally handed
over to the families (3/3) (AD)
9.00 Violent Child, Desperate Parents
New series. Child psychologist Laverne
Antrobus meets Debbie and her eightyear-old son Joe, whose uncontrollable
rages dominate the entire family. Too
scared of his violent outbursts to take
Joe out and about, Debbie is effectively
trapped in her house (1/4)
10PM
9PM
7.00 The One Show Live chat and
topical reports presented by
Matt Baker and Alex Jones
8PM
Waterstones Gift Cards may be redeemed in any Waterstones store in the UK towards the purchase of all eligible Waterstones products available. Gift Cards cannot be redeemed for cash. Waterstones Gift Cards will be sent within 28 days of purchasing a TLS subscription.
10.00 BBC News at Ten
Late
11PM
10.30 BBC Regional News and Weather;
followed by National Lottery Update
10.45 A Question of Sport With Ben Mee,
Christian Malcolm, Giles Scott,
and Chris and Gabby Adcock
11.15 Film 2018 New series. The film
review programme kicks off with a look
ahead to this weekend’s Oscars, as
host Clara Amfo and critics consider
the Academy’s nominations
11.50 Good (15, 2008) A literary professor
in 1930s Germany becomes morally
compromised when he unwittingly
contributes to the rise of the Nazi
party. Drama with Viggo Mortensen,
Jason Isaacs and Jodie Whittaker
1.25am-6.00 BBC News
11.15 Amazing Hotels: Life Beyond the
Lobby Return of the series exploring
extraordinary hostelries. Giles Coren
and Monica Galetti explore one of the
world’s most luxurious eco resorts
on the small island of Tetiaroa
in French Polynesia (r) (AD)
12.15am Sign Zone: Flatpack Empire Cameras follow
a designer trying to create an “imperfect vase” for IKEA,
and a look at what it takes to be a supplier for the
Swedish furniture company (r) (AD, SL) 1.15-2.00
Royal Recipes. Michael Buerk and Anna Haugh
prepare George V’s favourite curry (r) (AD, SL)
8.30 Coronation Street Bethany fears for
her state of mind, and Kate’s change of
heart disappoints Sophie (AD)
9.00 Benidorm New series. Billy and
Sheron celebrate their 25th wedding
anniversary with a holiday, but Rob’s
imminent arrival with a special friend
is likely to cause a family feud.
Meanwhile Sam is left in charge at the
Solana, and cannot resist trying to
make some extra cash (1/9) (AD)
10.00 ITV News at Ten
10.30 Regional News
10.45 Heathrow: Britain’s Busiest
Airport Dispatcher Callie has her plans
thrown into chaos when a passenger
disappears after checking on to their
flight, while security man Sundeep
searches an unusually dressed
traveller (3/3) (r) (AD)
10.00 Damned Nitin drops in on drunk
parent Zak, and Denise freezes on
live television when an old case is
brought up (3/6) (AD)
10.30 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown
Jimmy Carr hosts the words-andnumbers game, with team captains
Sean Lock and Jon Richardson joined by
Bill Bailey and Josh Widdicombe. Jake
Yapp is in Dictionary Corner (6/7) (r)
11.45 Heroes and Villains: Caught on
Camera A great-grandfather fights off
armed intruders at his home (3/6) (r)
11.35 24 Hours in A&E Cameras follow a
54-year-old who arrives at St George’s
hospital with symptoms of a suspected
stroke, and a 76-year-old turns up in
A&E with a severe head injury (r) (AD)
12.35am Jackpot247 Viewers get the chance to
participate in live interactive gaming from the comfort of
their sofas 3.00 Tenable. A team from London answers
questions about top 10 lists (r) (SL) 3.50 ITV
Nightscreen. Text-based information service
5.05-6.00 The Jeremy Kyle Show. Talk show (r) (SL)
12.30am Pokerstars Championship Cash Challenge
Action from the cash game in Monte Carlo 1.25 FILM:
Safety Not Guaranteed (15, 2012) Sci-fi comedy
starring Aubrey Plaza 2.50 The FGM Detectives (r) 3.45
The Question Jury (r) 4.40 Location, Location, Location
(r) 5.35-6.00 Superfoods: The Real Story (r) (AD)
10.00 When Chat Shows Go Horribly
Wrong Gloria Hunniford narrates a
compilation of talk show disasters.
The programme features Eamonn
Holmes’ infamous interview with a
monosyllabic David Blaine, Spike
Milligan causing mayhem on Wogan,
Joan Rivers launching into a rant at
guest Brigitte Nielsen, and Katrina
Buchanan enduring a succession of
technical issues while appearing
on a live Irish chat show (r)
12.55am SuperCasino 3.10 Cowboy Builders. A
hallway and dining room left in a very sorry state (r) 4.00
My Mum’s Hotter Than Me! (r) (SL) 4.45 House Doctor.
A bachelor pad in Knutsford, Cheshire (r) (SL) 5.10
Divine Designs. St Sophia’s Greek Orthodox Cathedral,
London (r) (SL) 5.35-6.00 Wildlife SOS (r) (SL)
the times | Wednesday February 28 2018
13
1G T
television & radio
The Supervet
Channel 4, 8pm
He may not wear
a cape, but Noel
Fitzpatrick is more
than worthy of the
title of Supervet. Not
only does he perform
veterinary miracles to
save and improve the
lives of people’s furry
friends, but he does
it with empathy and
kindness. Teddy, a tiny
jackahuahua puppy,
has been brought in
after being attacked
by another dog. Poppy,
aged ten, was given
Teddy as her birthday
present and he is her
first puppy. The injuries
are serious and Teddy
needs emergency spinal
surgery. “It’s 50:50
whether we’re going to
save him,” Fitzpatrick
tells the girl’s mum.
Keep the tissues handy.
Shetland
BBC One, 9pm
“This is nae your case
any more. You had your
chance 30 years ago.
And you blew it.” DI
Jimmy Perez (Douglas
Henshall) is sick of
people meddling in his
investigation, with the
ex-copper Drew (Sean
McGinley) the recipient
of this particular
no-nonsense Perezism.
While Perez attempts
to find out who Alan
Killick’s real father is,
Tosh (Alison O’Donnell)
gets to star in her own
Scandi noir when she
travels to Bergen to
track down the missing
oil company safety
officer. As a bonus
she is accompanied
by a strapping young
Norwegian copper
called Lars. Veldig bra.
Chris Bennion
Save Me
Sky Atlantic, 9pm
Lennie James co-wrote
and stars in this gritty
six-part thriller from
the makers of Line of
Duty. James is a rough
diamond called Nelson
“Nelly” Rowe, the
alpha in his lively local
boozer on a southeast
London council estate.
Nelly’s world is turned
upside down when he
is accused of abducting
the teenage daughter
he hasn’t seen for more
than a decade. Suranne
Jones plays the missing
girl’s distraught mother.
Everything about this
reeks of authenticity,
from the gripping
interrogation scene to
the convincing portrait
of life on a tough estate
(David Hare should
take notes), and James
and Jones are superb.
Sport Choice
BT Sport 1, 7.15pm
Tottenham Hotspur
and Rochdale face off
again in this FA Cup
fifth-round replay at
Wembley Stadium
(kick-off 8pm). A Harry
Kane penalty seemed to
have won the original
match for Spurs, but a
stoppage-time equaliser
earned the League One
side this exciting replay.
Sky One
Sky Atlantic
Sky Living
Sky Arts
Sky Main Event
Variations
6.00am Monkey Life (r) (AD) 7.00 RSPCA
Animal Rescue (r) 8.00 Send in the Dogs (r)
9.00 Road Wars (r) (AD) 10.00 Warehouse 13
(r) 11.00 Forever (r) (AD) 12.00 NCIS: Los
Angeles (r) 1.00pm Hawaii Five-0 (r) 3.00
NCIS: Los Angeles (r) 4.00 Stargate SG-1 (r)
5.00 The Simpsons (r) 5.30 Futurama (r) (AD)
6.00 Futurama. Bender becomes a pharaoh (r)
6.30 The Simpsons. Triple bill (r)
8.00 DC’s Legends of Tomorrow. The team
becomes embroiled in the sinister world of
demonologist and detective John Constantine
9.00 Strike Back: Retribution. Reynolds must
make a life-defining decision. Last in the series
10.00 Bliss. Andrew discovers his daughter
Christina and his son Kris seem to be socialising
10.30 A League of Their Own: Rally Special (r)
11.00 The Force: Essex (r) 12.00 Ross
Kemp: Extreme World (r) 1.00am Brit Cops:
Frontline Crime UK (r) (AD) 2.00 Most Shocking
(r) 3.00 Hawaii Five-0 (r) 4.00 It’s Me or
the Dog (r) (AD) 5.00 Futurama (r) (AD)
6.00am Richard E Grant’s Hotel Secrets (r) (AD)
7.00 Urban Secrets (r) 8.00 The Guest Wing (r)
(AD) 9.00 The West Wing (r) 11.00 House (r)
(AD) 1.00pm Without a Trace (r) 2.00 Blue
Bloods (r) (AD) 3.00 The West Wing (r) 5.00
House. Foreman treats a con artist (r) (AD)
6.00 House. A donor falls ill (r) (AD)
7.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation. Nick and
Sara investigate a possible suicide (r)
8.00 Blue Bloods. Danny investigates
the murder of a tourist (r) (AD)
9.00 Save Me. New series. Nelly Rowe is
targeted as the chief suspect in his estranged
daughter’s disappearance. Thriller starring
Lennie James. See Viewing Guide (1/6) (AD)
10.00 Gomorrah. Enzo finally begins to enjoy all
he has achieved. Ciro looks for a ceasefire (9/12)
11.00 Gomorrah. Genny sends Patrizia to agree
terms of surrender. In Italian (10/12)
12.00 Save Me (r) (AD) 1.00am Here and Now
(r) 2.10 Britannia (r) (AD) 3.10 Girls (r) (AD)
3.45 I, Tonya: Special 4.10 The West Wing (r)
6.00am 60 Minute Makeover (r) 7.00 Obese:
A Year to Save My Life USA (r) 8.00 Children’s
Hospital (r) (AD) 9.00 Criminal Minds (r) 10.00
Cold Case (r) 11.00 The Biggest Loser: Australia
12.00 Obese: A Year to Save My Life USA (r)
1.00pm The Chef’s Line 2.00 Nothing to Declare
(r) 4.00 Border Security: America’s Front Line
(r) 5.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation (r)
6.00 Criminal Minds (r)
7.00 Children’s Hospital (r) (AD)
7.30 Children’s Hospital (r) (AD)
8.00 Elementary. Holmes is abducted
by the leader of a street gang (r) (AD)
9.00 Grey’s Anatomy. The stress of managing
the hospital pushes Bailey to her limits
10.00 Criminal Minds. A four-year-old
girl is abducted in Mississippi (r)
11.00 Criminal Minds (r) 12.00 CSI: Crime
Scene Investigation (r) 1.00am Cold Case (r)
2.00 Elementary (r) (AD) 3.00 Border Security:
America’s Front Line (r) 4.00 Nothing to Declare
(r) 5.00 The Biggest Loser: Australia (r)
6.00am Dvorák: The Complete Symphonies 6.50
La Boheme 9.00 Tales of the Unexpected 9.30
Artists in Love (AD) 10.30 Video Killed the
Radio Star 11.00 The Sixties (AD) 12.00
Trailblazers: Madchester 1.00pm Discovering:
William Holden (AD) 2.00 Tales of the
Unexpected 2.30 Master of Photography (AD)
3.30 Video Killed the Radio Star 4.00 The
Sixties (AD) 5.00 Trailblazers: Gothic Rock
6.00 Discovering: Barbara Stanwyck (AD)
7.00 Portrait Artist of the Year 2018
8.00 National Treasures: The Art of Collecting.
Francesco Carraro’s collection of Venetian glass
9.00 Midnight Return: The Story of Billy Hayes
and Turkey. The author returns to Turkey
10.50 Buster Keaton: The Genius Crushed by
Hollywood. The rise and fall of the film star (AD)
11.50 Concert for George. Musical tribute
2.50am The Beatles: From Liverpool to San
Francisco (AD) 3.50 Beat Beat Beat 4.00 Dag
4.30 Tales of the Unexpected 5.00 Auction:
David Bowie Collector 5.30 Auction
6.00am Live One-Day International Cricket:
New Zealand v England. Coverage of the second
one-day international of the five-match series,
taking place at Bay Oval in Mount Maunganui
9.00 Good Morning Sports Fans 10.00 Live ATP
Tennis: The Dubai Duty Free Tennis
Championships. Coverage of the third day’s play
of the tournament in Dubai 1.30pm ATP Tour
Classic Matches (AD) 2.00 Sky Sports News
3.00 Live ATP Tennis: The Dubai Duty Free
Tennis Championships. Further coverage
6.30 Sky Sports News at 6
7.00 Sky Sports Tonight
7.30 Live SPFL: Motherwell v Aberdeen
(Kick-off 7.45). Coverage of the Scottish
Premiership match at Fir Park
10.00 The Debate
11.00 Sky Sports News
12.00 Live ATP Tennis: The Abierto Mexicano
Telcel. Coverage of day three of the ATP 500
tournament from the Acapulco Princess Mundo
Imperial 5.30am ATP Tour Classic Matches (AD)
BBC One N Ireland
As BBC One except: 10.40pm Nolan Live.
Lively debate on issues affecting Northern
Ireland 11.40 A Question of Sport. With Ben
Mee, Christian Malcolm, Giles Scott, and Chris
and Gabby Adcock 12.10am Film 2018. New
series. Film review show 12.45 FILM: Good
(2008) Drama starring Viggo Mortensen
and Jason Isaac 2.15-6.00 BBC News
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BBC One Scotland
As BBC One except: 8.00pm-9.00 River City.
Lydia realises how deeply involved she is in the
Murdoch business (r) (AD) 10.45 Holby City.
Roxanna pitches an experimental treatment
that could help Oliver recover (AD) 11.45
A Question of Sport 12.15am Film 2018. New
series. Film reviews 12.50 FILM: Good (2008)
Drama starring Viggo Mortensen 2.20 Weather
for the Week Ahead 2.25-6.00 BBC News
BBC One Wales
As BBC One except: 6.57pm-7.00 Party
Political Broadcast. By Plaid Cymru 9.00-10.00
Keeping Faith. Faith defends a priest accused of
theft 10.30 BBC Wales Live 11.10 Shetland.
Perez questions Donna about the shocking DNA
results (AD) 12.10am A Question of Sport
12.45-1.20 Film 2018. New series. Film
review programme 1.50-6.00 BBC News
BBC Two N Ireland
As BBC Two except: 9.50pm-10.30 True
North: Out of the Shadows. Gay liberation in
Northern Ireland (r) 11.15 Spotlight (r)
11.45-12.15am Mock the Week (r)
To subscribe visit tlssubs.imbmsubs.com/tlswater12 or call 01293 312178 and quote code TLSWATER12
BBC Four
E4
More4
Film4
ITV2
7.00pm Beyond 100 Days. News and analysis
7.30 Handmade on the Silk Road. Following
a potter in southern Iran (3/3) (r) (AD)
8.00 The Secret History of Our Streets.
The documentary returns to look at the history
of three archetypal streets in Scottish cities,
beginning with the Moray Estate in Edinburgh’s
New Town district (1/3) (r) (AD)
9.00 Nelson in His Own Words. Dramadocumentary based on Horatio Nelson’s personal
correspondence, revealing a complex man
whose passionate affair with Emma Hamilton
changed his life for ever (r) (AD)
10.00 British Empire: Heroes and Villains —
A Timewatch Guide. David Olusoga examines
how the British Empire has been portrayed on
British television. Last in the series (r) (AD)
11.00 Horizon: Is Seeing Believing?
Exploring the research carried out by scientists
into the human senses and how they might
be intricately interrelated (r)
12.00 California Comes to the Whistle Test (r)
1.00am Top of the Pops: 1982 (r) 2.00
Fabric of Britain (r) 3.00-4.00 Nelson
in His Own Words (r) (AD, SL)
6.00am Hollyoaks (r) (AD) 7.00 Coach Trip:
Road to Tenerife (r) (AD) 7.30 How I Met Your
Mother (r) (AD) 8.00 Baby Daddy (r) 9.00
Melissa & Joey (r) 10.00 How I Met Your
Mother (r) (AD) 11.00 Brooklyn Nine-Nine (r)
(AD) 12.00 The Goldbergs (r) (AD) 1.00pm The
Big Bang Theory (r) (AD) 2.00 Melissa & Joey
(r) 3.00 Baby Daddy (r) 4.00 Brooklyn
Nine-Nine (r) (AD) 5.00 The Goldbergs (r) (AD)
6.00 The Big Bang Theory (r) (AD)
6.30 The Big Bang Theory (r) (AD)
7.00 Hollyoaks. Mandy becomes jealous (AD)
7.30 Coach Trip: Road to Tenerife (AD)
8.00 The Goldbergs. Barry seeks advice (AD)
8.30 The Big Bang Theory (r) (AD)
9.00 Celebs Go Dating (AD)
10.00 Don’t Tell the Bride Ireland. A wedding
in a country pub car park in Offaly (3/8)
11.05 The Big Bang Theory (r) (AD)
11.35 The Big Bang Theory (r) (AD)
12.00 First Dates (r) (AD) 1.10am Celebs
Go Dating (r) (AD) 2.15 Don’t Tell the Bride
Ireland (r) 3.05 The Goldbergs (r) (AD) 3.30
Timeless (r) 4.15 How I Met Your Mother
(r) (AD) 4.35 Rude(ish) Tube (r)
8.55am Food Unwrapped (r) 9.30 A Place in
the Sun: Winter Sun (r) 11.30 Four in a Bed (r)
2.10pm Come Dine with Me (r) 4.50
A Place in the Sun: Winter Sun (r)
6.55 The Supervet. A cat needs surgery on its
knee after falling from a balcony (r) (AD)
7.55 Grand Designs. In Maidstone, a couple
entrust the building of a contemporary bungalow
to their daughter and son-in-law, who have
little such experience (8/8) (r) (AD)
9.00 Selling Houses with Amanda Lamb. The
host helps three sellers in Essex give their
homes a ready-to-market makeover (5/5) (AD)
10.00 Ugly House to Lovely House with George
Clarke. A pair of architects transform a 1980s
redbrick house that stands out like a sore thumb
among the grand Victorian properties it sits
alongside on a prestigious estate (r) (AD)
11.05 The Mega Brothel. A look inside a brothel
in Germany, exploring what life is like for the
women, clients and management (r) (AD)
12.10am Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares. In
Lampeter, Wales (r) 1.15 Selling Houses with
Amanda Lamb (r) (AD) 2.15 Grand Designs
(r) (AD) 3.15-4.00 8 Out of 10 Cats (r)
11.00am Pursued (PG, 1947) Western
starring Robert Mitchum (b/w) 1.05pm
Thoroughly Modern Millie (PG, 1967)
Musical comedy starring Julie Andrews and
James Fox 4.00 The Quiet Man (U, 1952)
John Ford’s romantic comedy drama
starring John Wayne and Maureen O’Hara
6.35 The Land Girls (12, 1997) Three Land
Army volunteers from different social
backgrounds become close friends while working
on a farm. Wartime drama starring Anna Friel,
Rachel Weisz and Catherine McCormack (AD)
8.50 Lady Bird Interview Special
9.00 Big Eyes (12, 2014) Artist Margaret
Keane’s work becomes a huge success, but her
controlling husband claims to have painted them
himself. Tim Burton’s fact-based drama with
Amy Adams and Christoph Waltz (AD)
11.10 Alien (18, 1979) A cargo spacecraft is
invaded by a deadly creature that begins preying
on the crew. Ridley Scott’s sci-fi horror with
Sigourney Weaver, Tom Skerritt, Ian Holm,
John Hurt and Harry Dean Stanton (AD)
1.25am-3.30 Wadjda (PG, 2012) Drama
with Waad Mohammed and Reem Abdullah
6.00am The Planet’s Funniest Animals (r) 6.20
Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records (r) 7.10
Dress to Impress (r) 7.55 Emmerdale (r) (AD)
8.20 The Cube (r) 9.25 The Ellen DeGeneres
Show (r) 10.15 Who’s Doing the Dishes? (r)
(AD) 11.10 Dress to Impress (r) 12.15pm
Emmerdale (r) (AD) 12.50 You’ve Been Framed!
Gold (r) 1.45 The Ellen DeGeneres Show 2.35
The Jeremy Kyle Show (r) 5.50 Take Me Out (r)
7.00 You’ve Been Framed! Gold (r)
7.30 You’ve Been Framed! Gold (r)
8.00 Two and a Half Men (r)
8.30 Two and a Half Men. Bridget
makes another reappearance (r)
9.00 Survival of the Fittest. The boys and girls
compete in the ultimate battle of the sexes
10.00 Celebrity Juice. With Johnny Vegas
and Rylan Clark-Neal (r)
10.50 Family Guy (r) (AD)
11.15 Family Guy (r) (AD)
11.45 American Dad! (r) (AD)
12.15am American Dad! (r) (AD) 12.40 The
Cleveland Show (r) 1.10 Two and a Half Men (r)
2.10 Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records (r)
2.20 Teleshopping 5.50 ITV2 Nightscreen
ITV3
ITV4
Dave
Drama
Yesterday
6.00am Classic Coronation Street (r) 6.55
Heartbeat (r) (AD) 8.00 The Royal (r) (AD) 9.05
Judge Judy (r) 10.25 The Cruise (r) 11.30 Love
Your Garden (r) 12.30pm The Royal (r) (AD)
1.35 Heartbeat (r) 2.40 Classic Coronation
Street (r) 3.45 On the Buses (r) 4.55 You’re
Only Young Twice (r) 5.25 George and Mildred.
Mildred tries to make an impression (r)
6.00 Heartbeat. A jealous husband disrupts
the County Sheepdog Trials (r)
7.00 Murder, She Wrote. The body of a
peg-legged man is discovered by Jessica’s
nephew Grady in her living room (r) (AD)
8.00 Endeavour. Morse investigates the case of
a boy from a broken home who has been
reported missing (4/4) (r) (AD)
10.00 Law & Order: UK. A man is found shot
dead and the detectives discover he owed his
ex-wife thousands of pounds (3/6) (r) (AD)
11.00 Law & Order: UK. The team investigates
the death of a wealthy woman whose body
was dumped in the Thames (4/6) (r) (AD)
12.05am Unforgotten (r) (AD, SL) 1.55
ITV3 Nightscreen 2.30 Teleshopping
6.00am The Chase (r) 6.45 Pawn Stars (r) 7.30
Ironside (r) 8.30 Quincy ME (r) 9.30 Minder (r)
(AD) 10.35 The Sweeney (r) 11.40 The
Avengers (r) 12.50pm Ironside (r) 1.55
Quincy ME (r) 2.55 Minder (r) (AD) 4.00
The Sweeney (r) 5.05 The Avengers (r)
6.10 Storage Wars: Texas. In Waxahachie (r)
6.40 Storage Wars. Ivy and Rene join forces (r)
7.05 Pawn Stars. Vintage toy cars (r)
7.35 Pawn Stars. A signed copy of Dracula (r)
8.00 Britain’s Busiest Motorway. Traffic officers
deal with a four-car pile-up (1/6) (r)
8.30 Britain’s Busiest Motorway. Traffic officers
Steve and Grant are sent to deal with a
90-ton crane that has exploded (2/6) (r)
9.00 FILM: Rush Hour (12, 1998) An overly
zealous Hong Kong detective investigating a
kidnapping in Los Angeles is teamed with a
loud-mouthed local cop. Comedy adventure
starring Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker (AD)
11.05 Lethal Weapon (r) (AD) 12.00 River
Monsters (r) 1.00am Car Crash Global:
Caught on Camera (r) 2.05 The Protectors (r)
2.40 ITV4 Nightscreen 3.00 Teleshopping
6.00am Home Shopping 7.10 Scrapheap
Challenge 8.10 American Pickers 9.00 Storage
Hunters UK 10.00 American Pickers 1.00pm
Top Gear (AD) 3.00 The Hurting 4.00 Road Cops
5.00 Top Gear. BMW’s off-roader, the X3 (AD)
6.00 Top Gear. The presenters race one
another across St Petersburg (AD)
7.00 Road Cops. Boy racers get together to
compete, but the meeting spirals out of control
7.30 Road Cops. A man who has been seen
throwing knives at a passing vehicle
8.00 Yianni: Supercar Customiser. A property
developer wants his car wrapped in gold (AD)
8.30 Yianni: Supercar Customiser. An unusual
nardo grey wrap for a Ferrari (AD)
9.00 Live at the Apollo. Lee Mack hosts the
stand-up show, with guest Sean Lock
10.00 Dave Gorman: Modern Life Is Goodish.
Hollywood culture and star lookalikes
11.00 Unspun XL with Matt Forde. Extended
version of the political comedy chat show
12.00 QI XL 1.00am QI 1.40 Would I Lie to
You? 2.15 Mock the Week 2.55 QI 3.30
Would I Lie to You? 4.00 Home Shopping
7.10am The Bill 8.00 London’s Burning 9.00
Casualty 10.00 Bergerac 11.00 The Bill 12.00
New Tricks (AD) 1.00pm Last of the Summer
Wine 1.40 Bread 2.20 Birds of a Feather 3.00
London’s Burning 4.00 New Tricks (AD) 5.00
Bergerac. Susan is placed in danger
6.00 Steptoe and Son. Harold is desperate
to get some privacy from Albert
6.40 Last of the Summer Wine. A rumour
causes ructions. Norman Wisdom guest stars
7.20 Last of the Summer Wine. A bored Barry
longs for a taste of the dangerous life
8.00 Dalziel & Pascoe. The mismatched
detectives go on the trail of a killer who calls
the local paper with a quotation from Hamlet
each time he claims a victim (3 & 4/8) (AD)
10.00 New Tricks. A case involving Sandra’s
father is reopened (5/8) (AD)
11.20 Birds of a Feather. The girls’ discover
making a profit with their new business is not
going to be as easy — thanks to Dorien
12.00 The Bill. Meadows misses a cry for help
1.00am Life on Mars 2.00 London’s Burning
2.55 Bleak House (AD) 4.00 Home Shopping
6.00am Coast (AD) 7.10 Pointless 8.00 Time
Team 9.00 Coast (AD) 10.00 Impossible
Railways (AD) 11.00 History’s Greatest Hoaxes
12.00 Time Team 1.00pm Hunters of the South
Seas (AD) 2.00 The Himalayas 3.00 Coast (AD)
4.00 History’s Greatest Hoaxes 5.00 Murder
Maps. The case of Dr Crippen
6.00 Nazi Hunters. Heinrich Himmler
7.00 Impossible Railways. A look at the
drive to make trains faster (6/6) (AD)
8.00 The Day When De Gaulle Chose War.
Charles De Gaulle’s refusal to surrender to
the German invasion of France in 1940
9.00 Open All Hours. Arkwright advertises
for a live-in housekeeper
9.40 Open All Hours. Granville tries to impress
Stephanie from the local boutique
10.20 Open All Hours. Nurse Gladys decides
Arkwright needs a lesson in politeness
10.55 The Two Ronnies. With Elaine Paige
11.40 The Two Ronnies. Vintage comedy,
including more from Sid and Lil
12.25am The Two Ronnies 1.20 Battleplan
2.15 Time Team 3.00 Home Shopping
BBC Two Scotland
As BBC Two except: 1.45pm Yes Chef. With
Luke Tipping (r) 2.30 Politics Scotland (r)
3.30-4.20 A Place to Call Home. Ash Park
prepares for a visit from the Prime Minister (r)
BBC Two Wales
As BBC Two except: 1.00pm Live Snooker: The
Welsh Open. Coverage of the afternoon session
on day three 4.25-5.20 A Place to Call Home
(r) 7.00-8.00 Live Snooker: The Welsh Open.
The evening session 11.15 Snooker: The Welsh
Open. Highlights 12.05am-12.15 Coast (r)
ITV Wales
As ITV except: 6.25pm-6.30
Party Political Broadcast. By Plaid Cymru
STV
As ITV except: 10.30pm Scotland Tonight
11.05 Serial Killer with Piers Morgan (r)
(AD) 12.00 Teleshopping 1.00am After
Midnight 2.30-5.05 ITV Nightscreen
UTV
As ITV except: 8.00pm-8.30 Rare Breed:
A Farming Year. A prize animal is seriously ill
10.45 Love Your Garden (AD) 11.15-11.45
Britain’s Brightest Family (AD) 12.35am
Teleshopping 2.05-3.00 ITV Nightscreen
BBC Alba
5.00pm Peppa (r) 5.10 Creag nam Buthaidean
(Puffin Rock) (r) 5.25 Ben & Hoilidh san
Rioghachd Bhig (r) 5.50 Seonaidh (Shaun the
Sheep) 6.00 Sràid nan Sgread (r) 6.10
Dragonan: Reis chun an iomaill (Dragons: Race
to the Edge) 6.35 Dè a-nis? 7.05 Caistealan
Alba (r) 7.30 Speaking Our Language (r) 7.55
Binneas: Na Trads (r) 8.00 An Là 8.30 North
Coast 500: Le Anne Lundon (r) 9.00 Opry an
Iúir (r) 10.00 Trusadh: Acrach airson
Atharrachadh 10.55 DIY le Donnie
11.45-12.00 Belladrum 2016: Cridhe Tartan
— Rachel Sermanni
S4C
6.00am Cyw 11.00 Dysgu Gyda Cyw 12.00
News S4C a’r Tywydd 12.05pm Crwydro (r)
12.30 Cefn Gwlad (r) (AD) 1.30 Mamwlad
gyda Ffion Hague (r) 2.00 News S4C a’r Tywydd
2.05 Prynhawn Da 3.00 News S4C a’r Tywydd
3.05 Pengelli (r) 3.30 Pobol y Glannau (r) 4.00
Awr Fawr 5.00 Stwnsh: Ffeil 5.05 Y Dyfnfor
5.25 Dewi a’r Ditectifs Gwyllt (r) 5.35 Fi yw’r
Bos (r) 6.00 News S4C a’r Tywydd 6.05 Ar y
Dibyn (r) 6.30 Mwy o Sgorio 7.00 Heno 8.00
Pobol y Cwm (AD) 8.25 Celwydd Noeth 9.00
News 9 a’r Tywydd 9.30 Ar Werth 10.00 Rygbi
Pawb 10.45 Y Ditectif (r) (AD) 11.15-11.50
999: Ambiwlans Awyr Cymru (r) (AD)
14
Wednesday February 28 2018 | the times
1G T
MindGames
times2 Crossword No 7587
1
2
3
4
5
Codeword No 3271
6
7
1
16
15
20
P
8
8
9
20
6
21
10
11
11
20
20
19
6
2
13
14
1
5
18
8
7
11
5
3
20
11
26
8
12
1
20
9
1
17
8
10
26
1
10
2
14
6
26
2
14
8
9
1
T
23
14
11
Train Tracks No 343
13
4
21
16
26
14
4
3
5
6
3
4
5
4
24
2
4
A
19
10
1
10
26
26
20
19
3
3
6
3
6
14
5
26
1
15
3
15
1
15
11
17
18
14
26
22
11
17
1
8
22
11
25
12
23
12
26
1
11
12
5
5
5
20
20
17
26
23
21
5
1
11
18
22
22
8
3
14
16
26
12
6
9
B
14
Lay tracks to enable the train to travel from village A to
village B. The numbers indicate how many sections of rail
go in each row and column. There are only straight rails
and curved rails. The track cannot cross itself.
23
5
Across
1 Audible art (5)
4 Place of significant danger
(3,4)
8 Kind of cheese (9)
9 The whole of (3)
10 Conjunction (3)
11 Detailed, complicated (9)
12 Edmond —, early writer on
card games (5)
Solution to Crossword 7586
E X PRE S S
A U A A
RE BUS M
T
E P
HOBGOB L
L
F
E
S T U F F Y
C E
B
I MP ROA
E E U N
NOT E L E T
C E E A
ERROR M
19
R I F L E
I
R N
US T ANG
E N
L
I N CH I
H S
ENR I CH
O S
S T B E E F
I
L
COY PU
E E
T
E S S AGE
13 Sudden increase (5)
16 Extremely precious (9)
18 Earth's star (3)
20 Dully factual (3)
21 Small citrus fruit (9)
22 Lightweight bullets (7)
23 Jousting weapon (5)
Down
1 Island nation (5)
2 Remove moisture from
(laundry) (4-3)
3 Peppermint liqueur (5,2,6)
4 Hired assassin (6)
5 Breed of cat; butterfly (13)
6 Public square (5)
7 Petroleum hydrocarbon (7)
12 Extravagantly publicised
(5,2)
14 Slavic language (7)
15 Entities (6)
17 Blissful period (5)
19 Sibling's daughter (5)
11
12
8
16
15
1
5
20
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
1
2
14
15
3
4
5
6
7
16
17
18
19
20
P
8
9
10
11
12
13
21
22
23
24
25
26
T
Every letter in this crossword-style grid has been substituted for a number
from 1 to 26. Each letter of the alphabet appears in the grid at least once. Use
the letters already provided to work out the identity of further letters. Enter
letters in the main grid and the smaller reference grid until all 26 letters of the
alphabet have been accounted for. Proper nouns are excluded.
Yesterday’s solution, right
Cluelines Stuck on Codeword? To receive 4 random clues call 0901 322 5000 or text
TIMECODE to 84901. Calls cost 75p plus your telephone company’s network access
charge. Texts cost £1 plus your standard network charge. For the full solution call
0907 181 1055. Calls cost 80p per minute plus your telephone company’s network access
charge. SP: Spoke, 0333 202 3390 (Mon-Fri, 9am-5.30pm).
Lexica
No 4155
No 4156
C
I
S
C
Y
G
D
Need help with today’s puzzle? Call 0906 757 7188 to check the
answers. Calls cost 80p per minute plus your telephone company’s
network access charge.
SP: Spoke, 0333 202 3390 (Mon-Fri 9am-5.30pm).
1
K
S
T
U
O
U
Y
R
Y
N
M
K
H
P
U
A
I
T
L
O
L
D
E
E
Y
O
N
U
E
K
W
O
E
F
V
Slide the letters either horizontally or vertically back into the grid to produce a
completed crossword. Letters are allowed to slide over other letters
KenKen Medium No 4263
Futoshiki No 3118
© 2010 KENKEN PUZZLE & TM NEXTOY. DIST. BY UFS, INC. WWW.KENKEN.COM
All the digits 1 to 6 must appear in every row and column. In
each thick-line “block”, the target number in the top lefthand corner is calculated from the digits in all the cells in the
block, using the operation indicated by the symbol.
10
Fill the grid so
that every
column, every
row and every
3x2 box contains
the digits 1 to 6
6Winners will
receive a Collins
English Dictionary
& Thesaurus
Solve the puzzle
and text in the
numbers in the
three shaded
boxes. Text
TIMES followed
by a space, then your three
numbers, eg, TIMES 123, plus your
name, address and postcode to
84901 (UK only), by midnight.
Or enter by phone. Call 09012
925274 (ROI 1516 303 501)
by midnight. Leave your three
answer numbers (in any order)
and your contact details.
Calls cost £1.00 (ROI €1.50) plus your telephone company’s
network access charge. Texts cost £1 plus your standard network charge.
Winners will be picked at random from all correct answers received.
One draw per week. Lines close at midnight tonight.
If you call or text after this time you will not be entered but will still be
charged. SP: Spoke, 0333 202 3390 (Mon-Fri, 9am-5.30pm).
<
3
4
24
6
∨
22
10
4 >
∧
∧
10
30
17
14
16
3
14
39
16
39
8
8
23
19
3
17
4
16
4
7
13
9
10
4
Fill the blank squares so that every row and column contains
each of the numbers 1 to 5 once only. The symbols between
the squares indicate whether a number is larger (>) or
smaller (<) than the number next to it.
16
20
10
Fill the grid using
the numbers 1 to 9
only. The numbers
in each horizontal
or vertical run of
white squares add
up to the total in
the triangle to its
left or above it. The
same number may
occur more than
once in a row or
column, but not
within the same
run of white
squares.
32
23
25
>
17
12
18
3
∧
∧
Win a Dictionary & Thesaurus
Kakuro No 2077
<
∧
What are your favourite
puzzles in MindGames?
Email: puzzles@thetimes.co.uk
16
17
30
23
© PUZZLER MEDIA
20
1
19
© PUZZLER MEDIA
16
the times | Wednesday February 28 2018
15
1G T
MindGames
White: Hikaru Nakamura
Black: Magnus Carlsen
Fischer Random (Game 7),
Baerum 2018
This game started from the following position.
________
á irDqDb4]
à0pD D 0 ]
ß D g D D]
ÞD h D Dp]
Ý D 0 D D]
ÜD DP0 )P]
ÛP)PDQDBH]
Ú$ D GRI ]
ÁÂÃÄÅÆÇÈ
The opening has been a disaster for Nakamura. Black has a
huge passed pawn on e3 and the
white king, which arrived at g1 via
a long “castling” move that is
permitted in chess960, is decidedly
vulnerable.
21 ... Ne6 22 Nf3 g5
Carlsen builds up his kingside
initiative remorselessly and doesn’t
allow his opponent any chances.
23 c3 g4 24 Nxd4 Nxd4 25 cxd4
gxh3 26 Be4
After 26 Bxh3 Bd5! 27 Bxc8
Qxc8, the black bishop on d5 is
worth far more than a rook and
the white king will not survive the
assault.
26 ... h4 27 Qxe3 Bh7 28 Rf3 Qh5
29 Bf2 Rhf8 30 Rxf8 Rxf8 31
Bxh7 Qxh7 32 g4 h2+ 33 Kh1
Qg8 34 Bxh4 Qxg4 35 Bf2 Qg8
36 Bh4
White is hanging on grimly but
as soon as Carlsen finds a way to
introduce his rook into the attack
the game will be over.
36 ... Qd5+ 37 Qe4 Qf7 38 Qg2
Qf4 39 Bg5 Qxd4 40 Bh6 Re8 41
Rd1 Qxd3 42 Rf1 Ka8 43 Rc1
Bb8 44 Qd2 Qe4+ 45 Qg2 Qe1+
46 Qf1 Qe6 White resigns
________
árhkhqgb4]
à0p0p0p0p]
ß D D d D]
ÞD D d D ]
Ý D D D D]
ÜD D D D ]
ÛP)P)P)P)]
Ú$NIN!BGR]
ÁÂÃÄÅÆÇÈ
________
á D 4 D D] Winning Move
àD D 4pi ]
ß DRD DpD] White to play. This position is from
German Bundesliga 2018.
ÞD D 1 ! ] Lammers-Zilka,
White’s pieces are hovering dangerously
ÝPD D D D] around the black king and he now found a
ÜD D DBH ] clever way to simplify into a winning
Û D D )KD] endgame. How did he continue?
ÚD D D D ] For up-to-the-minute information, follow
ÁÂÃÄÅÆÇÈ my tweets on twitter.com/times_chess.
Bridge Andrew Robson
Counting and Card Placement Dealer: South, Vulnerability: Neither
47-CompleteHandReconstruction(3)
♠Q 5
♥A 10 9 3 2
One of my favourite ever deals was
♦8 4
played some years ago by the great
♣10 6 3 2
Texan Bob Hamman. It formed
♠ 10 9 8
♠J 6
N
the basis of his (characteristically
♥Q J 8 7
♥K 5 4
W E
blunt) Bols bridge tip: “If you ever
♦K 7
S
♦
A
J
10
9
6
3
2
amount to anything at this game,
♣J 9 7 5
♣
K
you must build up a picture of the
♠A K 7 4 3 2
unseen hands.” And so say all of Contract: 4♠ ♥6
♦Q 5
us. “The idea is to know what the
♣AQ 8 4
problem is before you try to solve Lead: ♥4
it,” he continued.
S
W
N
E
Yes. Problem solving as declarer
2♦
Pass(1) Pass
1♠
(or the defence) comes in two parts.
2♠
Pass
3♠
Pass
(A). Working out what you
4♠
End
think the opponents hold.
(1) May make a negative double (hearts).
(B). Working out how to make
Putting those strands together
your contract given that layout.
Sometimes you need to reverse and reconstructing West’s hand,
(A) and (B), asking what you need he has two (+) spades, three (+)
the layout to be in order to succeed hearts and seven diamonds. That
leaves room for just one club.
— or wishful thinking.
Which begs the question, “Why
Let’s be Sherlock. West bid 2♦ didn’t he lead his singleton club?”
yet (i) didn’t lead a top diamond —
Because it is the king. West
so East has either ♦K or ♦A and would lead any singleton club
(ii) didn’t receive any support — except for ♣K (which he hopes to
East would normally raise to 3♦ make later by not leading it).
with ♦Axx/♦Kxx. Probably West
You have worked out West’s
has seven diamonds and East two.
hand before playing a card. On to
Now analyse West’s (low) heart challenge (B) — how to make 4♠.
lead. If it were singleton, East
Win ♥4 with ♥A and cross to
would have ♥KQJxxx and would ♠A both following. Next cash ♣A,
have surely bid 2♥. West would as you surmised dropping West’s
have led top from two, so he has ♣K. Next cross to ♠Q, drawing
three (or four) hearts headed by West’s last trump. Now lead ♣3,
non-sequential honour(s) — no planning to insert ♣8 if East plays
top of a sequence.
low. Assuming East inserts ♣9,
Now for a spot of necessary win ♣Q (West discarding), cash
wishful thinking. Your 4♠ contract ♠K drawing East’s third spade and
is very pushy — both the 3♠ and use ♣8 and ♣10 as equals against
(especially) 4♠ bids are marginal East’s ♣J7 to set up a third club
(you hate your ♦Qx). You really trick. Ten tricks — fabulous stuff.
need spades to split 3-2.
andrew.robson@thetimes.co.uk
EASY
84
MEDIUM
HARDER
5/6
HALF OF
IT
OF IT
44
3/4
OF IT
x6
57
x6
TREBLE
IT
÷4
DOUBLE
IT
+8
TREBLE
IT
OF IT
– 52
– 13
2/3
+ 498 +1/4
OF IT
2/3
OF IT
x 5 – 25
HALF OF 3/4
IT
OF IT
HALF OF
IT
+ 209 + 1/2
OF IT
– 284 HALFIT OF – 289 x 8
3
6
Killer Tricky No 5887
19
17min
11
÷
10
12
4
28
12
15
21
12
14
7
3
9
17
16
12
3
7
14
3
12
9
24
9
5
3
4
1
2
6
13
10
14
18
21
56min
16
12
14
19
12
11
20
8
9
5
14
3
8
7
8 5 2
9 7 1
8
7
6
9
5
1
3
1
4
2
3
7
6
8
9
5
3
9
8
1
5
4
6
2
7
6
5
7
8
9
2
4
1
3
5
6
3
2
4
1
9
7
8
2
7
4
9
8
3
5
6
1
4
3
5
6
2
7
1
8
9
7
8
6
5
1
9
3
4
2
9
2
1
4
3
8
7
5
6
3
7
5
2
8
9
4
1
6
6
2
9
7
1
4
8
5
3
1
4
8
6
3
5
7
2
9
2
8
3
9
7
1
6
4
5
9
1
6
4
5
8
3
7
2
4
5
7
3
6
2
1
9
8
5
6
4
1
9
3
2
8
7
7
9
2
8
4
6
5
3
1
8
3
1
5
2
7
9
6
4
=
55
=
2
1 9
7 6
4
9
5
6
7
8
3
C
O
N
S
E
Q
U
E
N
C
E
8
6
7
9
4
19
16
10
3
11
14
As with standard Sudoku, fill the grid so that every
column, every row and every 3x3 box contains the
digits 1 to 9. Each set of cells joined by dotted lines
must add up to the target number in its top-left corner.
Within each set of cells joined by dotted lines, a digit
cannot be repeated.
3 3
3
1
7
8
6
3
2
9
4
5
2
9
4
8
5
1
7
6
3
6
3
5
7
9
4
1
2
8
4
8
9
3
2
7
6
5
1
4
1
9
8
2
6
7
5
3
2
3
6
7
9
5
8
4
1
7
8
5
4
3
1
2
6
9
6
2
8
9
4
7
1
3
5
7
6
3
1
8
5
2
9
4
9
2
1
5
4
3
8
7
6
8
4
7
9
1
6
5
3
2
3
5
6
2
7
8
4
1
9
3
4
7
5
1
2
9
8
6
9
5
1
6
8
3
4
7
2
1
7
2
3
6
4
5
9
8
5
9
3
2
7
8
6
1
4
8
6
4
1
5
9
3
2
7
9
4
5
5
∨
<
2
3
2
∧
3
∧
5
3
4
7
+
-
3
2
2
3
6
2
2
3
2
3
∧
4
4
1
1
5
4
9
÷
x
+
÷
6
5
2
+
x
+
x
3
6
2
3
6
2
3
6
4
3
4
1
5
1
B
Suko No 2172
1
8
3
9
6
7
5
2
4
6
4
9
5
8
2
7
3
1
5
2
7
4
3
1
8
9
6
3
7
1
8
2
5
4
6
9
9
6
8
7
1
4
2
5
3
4
5
2
6
9
3
1
7
8
8
3
4
2
5
9
6
1
7
2
1
6
3
7
8
9
4
5
7
9
5
1
4
6
3
8
2
B
U
R
O
D
E
N
U
M
E
N
D
R
O
V
D
U
I
L
B
E
E
Lexica 4154
3 > 2
2
4
A
Lexica 4153
5 > 4 > 1
1
1
O L L Y
U
A
E
T
S P A
S
R
BOU T
RR
H
I D L E
S S
N
KN EW
I
A
G CUR
E
E
E
L I R T
Sudoku 9694
5
1
2
4
6
9
3
8
7
Set Square 2079
5
6
Train Tracks 342
U S UA L
J
H
L
L
AR
E X AC
U
V
I GH GA S
A I L
E
U I Z
O D
E AR
A
AR L
Y E N
O
U
OO
S P R I
S
U O
S T UMP
F
Futoshiki 3117
22
12
=
168
Please note, BODMAS does not apply
1
26
10
x
Killer 5886
Cell Blocks 3153
7
x
Sudoku 9693
8
1
9
7
6
5
2
3
4
21
8
8
+
2 8 4
4 9 8
2 1 6 3
5
1 2
9
7 5
5 2
1 3
9 8
6
9 7
8
5 6
KenKen 4262
10
+
from 1 to 9 in
the grid, so that
the six sums
work. We’ve
= 23 placed two
numbers to get
you started.
Each sum
should be
= 63 calculated left
to right or top
to bottom.
Codeword 3270
7 8
8 9
Killer 5885
Killer Deadly No 5888
= 6 the numbers
x
+
Sudoku 9692
9
x
x
Enter each of
3
Solutions
7
5
6
3
1
21
x
+
Kakuro 2076
13
7
15
Divide the grid
into square or
rectangular
blocks, each
containing one
digit only.
Every block
must contain
the number of
cells indicated
by the digit
inside it.
Set Square No 2080
Yesterday’s answers
acne, acned, ana, anal, and, can,
canal, candela, candle, cane, caned,
clan, clean, dan, dance, dean, decanal,
den, elan, eland, end, laden, lance,
land, lane, lean, lend, nada, ned
5
4
8
From these letters, make words of
four or more letters, always including
the central letter. Answers must be in
the Concise Oxford Dictionary,
excluding capitalised words, plurals,
conjugated verbs (past tense etc),
adverbs ending in LY, comparatives
and superlatives.
How you rate 12 words, average;
16, good; 20, very good; 24, excellent
19
7
3 4 4
4 4
Polygon
22
2
© PUZZLER MEDIA
As noted yesterday, I have mixed
feelings concerning the sudden
popularity of chess960. However,
there are precedents, even in
traditional chess, for unorthodox
offshoots. For example, in the
18th and 19th centuries, games at
odds were extremely common.
The stronger player removed a
pawn or a piece at the start of the
game and sometimes gave the
opponent an extra move.
There are also well established
regional variations of chess that
we have known since the 15th
century. These include shatranj,
still played in some Arabic counteries and the precursor of modern chess, shogi, the Japanese
version, where captured pieces,
like mercenaries, go over to the
other side; and xiang qi (Chinese
chess), where a river divides the
board and the kings are confined
within their respective fortresses.
After 21 moves, this was the
position on the board.
© PUZZLER MEDIA
Chess variants
Cell Blocks No 3154
Brain Trainer
ANSWER ANSWER ANSWER
Chess Raymond Keene
1
+
+
8
Quiz 1 JM Barrie 2 Pacific Ocean 3 Florence
Nightingale 4 Heart 5 John Thaw 6 Paris
7 St John the Baptist 8 Through the LookingGlass. The hypothesis states that species need
constant change to keep up with the competition
9 Barking 10 Adam Bede 11 Samarkand 12 Leos
Janacek 13 Colonel Mustard 14 Steffi Graf. It
was her last career grand-slam singles title
15 Alex Turner
P
A
P
U
S
A
L
I
N
S
T
A
I
S
M
U
U
T
S
U
L
L
E
N
Word watch
Nidus (c) In pathology, a
focus of infection
Nidor (a) An unpleasant
odour especially of
burning animal products
Narghile (b) A flexible
water pipe for smoking
Brain Trainer
Easy 20; Medium 507;
Harder 1,632
Chess 1 Nf5+! Qxf5 2 Qxe7
leaves White a piece ahead
28.02.18
MindGames
Difficult No 9695
Fill the grid so that
every column, every
row and every 3x3
box contains the
digits 1 to 9.
Fiendish No 9696
9 2
7 4
6 3
3 5
7 4
2
8
9
Word watch
by Josephine
Balmer
1
6 5
5 9
4 6
Nidus
a A fool
b Begrudging
c An infection
Nidor
a An odour
b Obsessive
c Grass-eating
Answers on page 15
6
8
3
9 6
5
to receive four clues for any of today’s puzzles. Calls cost 75p plus your telephone company’s
network access charge. SP: Spoke, 0333 202 3390 (Mon-Fri 9am-5.30pm).
by Olav Bjortomt Times MindGames books
GETTY IMAGES
1 Who wrote the 1904
play Peter Pan or The
Boy Who Wouldn’t
Grow Up?
11 The 14th-century
conqueror Tamerlane
ruled from which city in
modern-day Uzbekistan?
2 What is the world’s
deepest ocean?
12 Which Czech
composed the rhapsody
Taras Bulba, the opera
Kata Kabanova and
the Glagolitic Mass?
15
4 Atrial fibrillation refers
to which organ having
an abnormal rhythm?
5 Which late English
actor links the TV series
Redcap, The Sweeney,
Home to Roost and
Inspector Morse?
Bogart said: “We’ll
always have…” what?
character in which
Lewis Carroll novel?
7 The Umayyad
Mosque in
Damascus is said
to contain the
head of which New
Testament prophet?
9 Since 1994,
Margaret Hodge
has been the Labour
MP for which east
London constituency?
8 The evolutionary
theory, the Red
Queen hypothesis,
is named after a
6 In the film
Casablanca, Humphrey
10 The title character
of which George Eliot
debut novel, set in
Hayslope, marries the
preacher Dinah Morris?
13 Which Cluedo
character shares his
name with a condiment?
The Times MindGames: Word
Puzzles & Conundrums and
Number & Logic Puzzles are
out now. To order copies visit
timesbooks.co.uk or call
0844 576 8120. Also available
from all good bookshops.
Yesterday’s B A L L M A T E R I A L
Quick
R
E
E
A
E
G
Cryptic
T OMA H AWK
GE E K
M
T
N
I
I
L
solution
P A T HOS
NUMB E R
No 1036
A
H E
A
T R
L
NO
B
S E
14 The 1999 French
Open was the 22nd
grand-slam singles
title won by which
German tennis star?
15 Which Arctic
Monkeys lead vocalist
is pictured?
Answers on page 15
2
3
4
5
8
6
by Joker
7
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
20
19
22
23
21
E
G
E
S
A R T L E S S N E S S
J
A
T
E
CH A S T E
U A N T
C
V
O
T
R
OK
I MP L I C I T
E
A
S
O
P
N T E NC E
N E E D
Follow The Times Crossword
Editor @timescrosswords
The Times Quick Cryptic No 1037
1
3 2 9 6 7
7 9
1
1
2
9
9
4
6 2
7
4 6
8
2
7
1 6
5
6
3 2
Cluelines Stuck on Sudoku, Killer or KenKen? Call 0901 322 5005 before midnight
The Times Daily Quiz
3 Which woman was
featured on Bank of
England £10 notes
from 1975 to 1994?
9
1 3 7
5
1
7
8
2
7
7 9 8
4
2
2 5
5 7
For interactive
Sudoku puzzles, visit
thetimes.co.uk/puzzles
Super fiendish No 9697
3
2
3
6 3
Narghile
a Plodding
b A pipe
c Carping
7 2
PUZZLER MEDIA
Sudoku
Across
1 Albacore freshly served
around northern Spanish city
(9)
6 The way in which food’s given
away cold (3)
8 Best man hugged by old friend
(7)
9 Mostly lukewarm about
medium speeds in music (5)
10 We had sound of bell spoil
church piece by Mendelssohn
(7,5)
12 Really dislike half of side
before cricket international (6)
13 Difficult adhesive (6)
16 Now grim anger is all over the
place promoting conflict (12)
19 Part of roof beginning to break
in high wind (5)
20 Interlink European night train
initially with Bordeaux? (7)
22 Manage a score at cricket (3)
23 Will meant to be changed
during trial (9)
Down
1 Purchase includes round float
(4)
2
3
4
5
6
7
11
12
14
15
17
18
21
Give way concerning cure (7)
What has branches in
Chelmsford? (3)
Thrashing one-nil where
Internet games are played (6)
Change round what may
be shown on dial for cockpit
instrument (9)
Iliad’s author is in capital of
Rhodes (5)
Substantial work at first
needing a total of four scores
(7)
Dish one street that’s corrupt
(9)
Undertake bet for titled widow
(7)
Enclose penalty payment after
swindle (7)
For instance, topless dress is
way out (6)
Christmas bird takes a lot of
covering (5)
Put nitrogen in to check gas
exhaust (4)
Side’s lost minutes in
afternoon break (3)
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