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The Times Times 2 13 September 2017

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September 13 | 2017
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From left: Carolina Herrera,
Calvin Klein, Oscar de la Renta,
Jonathan Simkhai
2
1GT
Wednesday September 13 2017 | the times
times2
More women,
My labrador isn?t fat
from eating chocolates ?
it?s scientifically proven
Carol Midgley
T
his column normally
rises above cheap
triumphalism (except
on Wednesdays), but
today it definitely does
not. Today it says to
friends, family,
acquaintances and
know-it-alls: ?Ha-ha, up yours, told
you so.? Because science proves it is
not my fault.
It is not my fault that my labrador is
greedy and prone to becoming what
we shall call ?plus-size?. It is not his
fault that when he spies a picnic or a
dropped chip 100 feet away he speeds
towards it, pulling me behind like a
middle-aged waterskier in an H&M
fleece. Or that one Christmas when
we nipped out to the shop he
consumed an entire family-size tin of
Quality Street complete with wrappers
and for the next three days emitted
kaleidoscopic stools. (Other than that,
totally fine. Didn?t even vomit. He
must have missed the memo that
chocolate is ?poisonous to dogs?.)
Labradors, it turns out, are
genetically predisposed to hunger and
obesity. A quarter carry at least one
copy of a mutant form of the POMC
gene, according to a Cambridge
University study. It seems humans
may have exacerbated the problem by
using treats to train them as help dogs.
Which means that all those people, but
mainly my husband, who have
accused me of overfeeding,
sausage-roll enabling,
being a soft touch when
his strings of drool are
touching the floor
(which is hard to
ignore) and not
being arsed to train
him properly should
apologise (flowers
welcome).
It may
have been
my fault that
the hamster,
God rest its soul, was
fat but, tell me, what
else does a caged
rodent have to look
forward to other
than eating? It?s
not as if it ever
had a hot date or
Dr Foster
is having
it easy
felt depressed by a shaming bikini
photo on its fridge. It lived for two and
a half years, which is average, was
never ill and never once saw its
?curves? in a mirror. So did those extra
nibble sticks really matter or deserve
such mocking (again, that one?s mainly
to my husband)? The dog, though; we
now know he?s hardwired that way.
It turns out to be an excellent week
for blame avoidance. Another study
has found that if middle-aged men
with diabetes have a fat wife they can
probably finger her for it (so to speak).
A study from Aarhus University in
Denmark found that a man in his
fifties with an obese partner is seven
percentage points more likely to
develop type 2 diabetes than a man
whose wife isn?t a pavement cracker
(Aarhus University didn?t use that
particular term). It doesn?t work the
other way round, however: fat
husbands don?t necessarily make for
unhealthy wives. This is because,
scientists believe, women may have a
?stronger influence? over what their
husbands eat.
Is that a roundabout way of saying
?women do most of the cooking??
Because if so, in terms of blame
avoidance this puts those men on
shakier ground than my labrador. He
can?t help his weird gene that fails to
inform him when he has eaten quite
enough (at one regrettable point in his
youth he even ate other dogs?
turds). But human beings
very much can help
seeing the pizza,
chips and beans
placed on their
plate yet again
and not saying:
?Thanks,
love,
?
but
b do you know
what? I think
I?ll
I have a
ssalad.? Plus my
dog?s
got oddly
d
short
legs for a
s
labrador, which
means he
doesn?t carry his
weight
well. If
w
you have the
same problem,
then, genuinely,
commiserations.
It?s
I a bitch.
Why does everyone
keeps saying that the
BBC drama Doctor
Foster is a portrait of
the most toxic failed
marriage ever?
Compared with some
it?s positively tame.
The GP may have
dissolved her wedding
ring in acid (meh) while
her ex sent her a
bouquet with a card
reading ?Bitch? (I know
some who have had
worse), but this is
amateur league next to
the wilting union of
Princess Margaret and
Lord Snowdon.
A new book by Craig
Brown claims that as
the couple?s mutual
animosity grew
Snowdon would leave
notes on her desk. One
He was disinherited and dismissed from
running his father?s legendary nightclub,
Annabel?s. Yet it led him to build a new
empire, Robin Birley tells Liz Hoggard
Am I out of
key on the
piano man?
Where do you stand
on the so-called piano
man, who vowed to play
non-stop on College
Green in Bristol until
his ex-girlfriend agreed
to take him back? Do
you find it romantic
or creepy and a bit
stalkerish as many
on social media
apparently do?
Speaking as someone
who has never had
anyone try to win them
back publicly and is not
bitter about that AT
ALL, I suppose I should
try to view it as tearjerkingly quixotic. But
I can?t see past the part
that?s a bit pass-agg
controlling.
Besides, playing a
piano all night must be
annoying for other
Bristolians who may
want to smash your
organ to pieces. If it
were Hollywood?s
America or a Richard
Curtis film she would
appear at his piano and
they would kiss. Sadly
this is real-life Britain,
so what actually
happened was that
someone punched him
in the head at 4am. He
has stopped playing and
she has probably left
the country. Maybe
next time just send
some chocolates?
was headed ?24 Reasons
Why I Hate You?.
At one point he is
said to have flicked lit
matches at her and
when she objected that
he might set her dress
on fire, he reportedly
replied: ?Good thing
too. I hate that
material.? Doctor
Foster should take
notes and up its game.
R
obin Birley is telling
me how he loathes
all-male gatherings.
He?s proud that his
private members? club,
5 Hertford Street, in
Mayfair, London, is
40 per cent women.
?God, what a miracle I?m able to
do that,? he says with a sigh. ?It?s
something I cling on to like a life raft.?
Forget gentlemen?s clubs thick with
the fug of cigar smoke; Birley says that
he?s obsessed with making his club as
feminine as possible. ?Like the law of
gravity, in these clubs it?s always men
who predominate. You have to work at
it to make it female-friendly. That?s not
just picking the members, it?s how
they?re treated when they?re here.?
The staff must know the difference
between a man being a flirt and a bore.
?Two or three women having a drink
don?t want to be bothered by waves of
men coming over. It?s a nightmare.?
Too much machismo is draining. ?If I
go down and see lots of men in the
courtyard, I go, ?Oof.? It?s not about
having 15 models here, it?s about
having a femininity. I?m not being PC,?
he assures me. ?It?s how I see it.?
His family has been written about so
much that it?s easy to feel you know
everything about Birley, 59. His father,
Mark, founded the nightclub Annabel?s
in 1963. Named after Robin?s mother,
Annabel Vane-Tempest-Stewart, it was
the hangout of royalty and rock stars.
Robin?s half-siblings are Jemima, Zac
and Ben Goldsmith (born after his
mother bolted to be with the billionaire
financier Sir James Goldsmith).
Birley is married to Lucy Helmore,
the ex-wife of Bryan Ferry. They live
opposite 5 Hertford Street, although
the club is a ?home for home?, he
admits. ?Those clubs were my home
from my earliest childhood.?
A psychologist might wonder if it?s
the stable home he never had (he was
a teenager when his parents divorced).
Progressive gender balance aside, the
club is defiantly old-school. Birley bans
laptops (?it kills a room?) and loves a
dress code. ?A jacket is the anchor
everything revolves around. I think
men look better in a tie, personally,
though I don?t enforce it. I just can?t
bear looking at men?s hairy chests.?
And riffraff don?t get past the door.
He coughs delicately. ?I?m afraid it is
true that One Direction got rejected.
Claude [the doorman] said, ?The only
direction you?re going is out the door.?
Because they just barged in.?
In his immaculately cut suit Birley
resembles an Evelyn Waugh character.
His blue whippet, Arnie, dozes by him
on the sofa. There?s a dash of upperclass aloofness, but kindness too. One
imagines a life of ease and privilege.
Yet his life has been marked by
tragedy. At the age of 12 he was badly
disfigured when he was mauled by a
tiger at John Aspinall?s private zoo.
Today, after many operations, he says:
?I loathe being photographed. I just
can?t even bear to look at . . . for
reasons that I won?t go into. I?m not
trying to be Howard Hughes, I just
absolutely hate seeing photographs of
myself. You?ll never see any of me
here.? He gestures around the club
drawing room. ?And almost no
photographs at my mother?s house
either.? He even turned down being
painted by Lucian Freud. ?I knew him
a little. He was very, very charming.?
His older brother, Rupert, vanished
aged 30 while swimming alone off the
west African coast in 1986. His body
was never recovered. And the year
before Mark Birley died in 2007, he
dismissed his son from his position
running Annabel?s. In a storyline that
could be straight out of Waugh, Robin
had hired a private detective to
investigate the background of Robert
Macdonald, his sister India Jane?s lover
and the father of her child. He had
been tipped off that Macdonald was a
Some people
thrive on rows.
I don?t happen
to be one
bounder, but the tip-off was false and
Robin fell out spectacularly with his
father and sister.
To punish him Mark sold the Birley
Group, including Mark?s Club and
Harry?s Bar, to Richard Caring for �
million. In his will he left Robin a token
�million; the bulk of his estate was
left in trust to India Jane?s son, Eben.
Birley refuses to indulge in self-pity.
?Look, being disinherited was the best
thing that ever happened to me in my
life because I had to start all over
again and fight my way up. The best
inheritance I got was the experience
my father gave me ? understanding
how things [in a club] work.?
In 2012 he decided to launch his
own club near Annabel?s. He planned
to call it Birley?s, but Caring insisted
he owned the rights to the name.
Birley was devastated, but settled on
calling it 5 Hertford Street instead and
spent � million refurbishing the
23,000 sq ft townhouse. The interior
feels like the great country house
party you were invited to by mistake
(until sharply you realise that the
joining fee is �500 for over-35s, plus
�000 a year). Rifat Ozbek designed
the in-house nightclub, Loulou?s
(named after Robin?s cousin, the
fashion designer Loulou de la Falaise).
Birley describes the decor as ?a
mixture of English upper-class and
Turkish whirlwind?.
The club has been a great success
and Birley?s ambition to attract women
through its doors has paid dividends:
Daphne Guinness, Liz Hurley, Bella
the times | Wednesday September 13 2017
3
1GT
times2
no bores, no One Direction
MICHAEL LECKIE FOR THE TIMES; GETTY IMAGES
Robin Birley, his half-sister Jemima Goldsmith and their mother, Annabel
Elizabeth Hurley and her son,
Damian, at 5 Hertford Street
Hadid and Victoria Beckham have
been spotted here, while Leonardo
DiCaprio, George Clooney and Mick
Jagger have reportedly all put in
appearances (One Direction?s Harry
Styles also eventually gained
entrance). Birley has even lured staff
from Annabel?s. ?I really cling to them.
They really are family to me,? he says.
Birley?s eclectic art collection hangs
on the walls ? he bounds around,
pointing out a Graham Sutherland, a
Walter Sickert and an Augustus John.
Birley adores ?old-fashioned 20thcentury portraiture? and we?re here to
talk about one artist in particular, his
grandfather Sir Oswald Birley ? later
this month Birley and the gallerist
Philip Mould are staging the first big
retrospective of his work.
In his heyday Oswald was seen as a
successor to John Singer Sargent and
Augustus John. He painted Winston
Churchill, George V and Gandhi, but
sank into obscurity after his death in
1952 and today an air of mystery hangs
over him. ?I?m very sad I never knew
him,? says Birley. ?He died six years
before I was born and my father never
ever, ever talked about him . . . Do you
know, it?s an odd family because he
was buried in an unmarked grave. It
was just negligence. His commissions
book and painting stuff was lost. His
Military Cross is lost. When the
sale came up of the contents of
Charleston Manor [which was left
to Mark], my father sold off
extraordinary things belonging to
my grandfather. I don?t think there
was a great emotional attachment.
It wasn?t a very close family. No
one seemed to get on with anyone.
My father didn?t get on with his
mother, he didn?t get on with his
sister, she didn?t get on with him.?
His father left him ?half a dozen?
of his grandfather?s paintings in his
will. He has since been quietly
buying them up and today they
adorn the walls of 5 Hertford Street;
Churchill hangs in the men?s room.
Mould believes that Oswald is an
English artist ripe for reappraisal, but
there?s also an emotional aspect to the
show. ?Robin is quite a private man,?
Mould says, ?but I think for him
there?s a sense of unfinished business,
a need to showcase a figure who was
an integral part of his DNA.?
Robin Birley. Below: the
ballerina Kyra Nijinska
by Oswald Birley, 1939
Power & Beauty: The
Art of Sir Oswald Birley
is at Philip Mould &
Company, London SW1,
from September 26
to October 10,
philipmould.com
Like his grandson, Oswald was at
ease with high society, Mould says. ?A
great portrait painter has to have skill
with people; you?re sitting with them
for hours on end.? It took quite a lot
of ?trout tickling? for Oswald to bring
Churchill round during his sitting.
Birley describes Oswald as a
workaholic: ?probably quite detached,
quite cold but very brave?. During the
First World War he became a spotter
for the Intelligence Corps, making
sorties with the Royal Flying Corps ?
?one of the worst and most dangerous
positions you could be in, hovering
over the trenches?. He was awarded
the Military Cross in 1919. After the
war he married Rhoda Lecky Pike
(immortalised in his paintings)
when he was 41 and she was 21. ?She
brought in a bohemian Anglo-Irish
wildness, while my grandfather was
a proper fishing-and-shooting gent.?
They bought Charleston Manor
in Sussex, and had two children,
Maxine (who later became the
model Maxime de la Falaise) and
Mark. Oswald and Rhoda had a
?bizarre living arrangement? with
Rhoda?s younger lover, Victor
Warrender (later Lord Bruntisfield).
It wasn?t the happiest of triangles,
Birley says. ?I think Victor was a bit
of a good-looking shit, basically.?
The London club scene is booming.
Birley plans at least two more in
Mayfair. Caring is moving Annabel?s to
a townhouse two doors down from the
original Berkeley Square basement at
a cost of � million. Can London
support so many exclusive clubs?
?Look, the good ones will survive,
the bad ones will go to the wall,? Birley
says. He insists that he and Caring are
on good terms now. ?We?re perfectly
friendly. Some people thrive on rows.
I don?t happen to be one. I don?t think
Richard is either. When he comes in,
I say hello. Let bygones be bygones.?
Does it sting not being able to use
the family name? ?You know, in a
funny way, it worked out for the best.
If you asked me today if I?d have
called it Birley?s, I wouldn?t have done.
Naming the nightclub Loulou?s after
my cousin is far more glamorous.?
He tells me about his mother?s
recent annual summer party at the
club, where three generations hung
out on different floors. Lucy, Ozbek
and the artists were on the top floor.
Annabel and her ?squarer brigade?
were on the next floor, and his halfbrother ?Ben-Ben? partied with the
twenty and thirtysomethings below.
?My wife would like it if it were all just
artists,? Birley admits. He prefers a
more eclectic mix. ?You want to see
multi-ages: old people, young people.?
Birley started in the 1980s by
revolutionising lunchtime eating. His
Birley sandwich bars were aimed at
merchant bankers in bowler hats. He
still owns the chain, but rarely visits.
He?s too busy planning a second club
for business types to mingle (rumoured
to be in the old Annabel?s premises). ?It
will be business-business-social.? So lots
of female chief executives, I tease. ?I
like women who do all sorts of things,?
he demurs. ?Ladies of leisure, women
who paint, or who work as CEOs.?
But first in February he?s opening ?a
restaurant about wine? in Albemarle
Street, Mayfair, named Oswald?s ? the
wine labels will feature his grandfather?s
paintings. It will have a dedicated
storage space for private collectors ?to
encourage people to drink their own
cellars in the club and pay a higher
membership fee?. It?s another gamble
he admits but ?I?ve noticed here that
very few people buy �0-�000
bottles. It?s that thing of: ?I know that
bottle cost �0, I can?t quite bring
myself to spend �0 on it?.?
Birley has to dash to a meeting. Like
his meritocratic grandfather, he still
has to sing for his supper. ?I don?t
think he inherited any money, my
grandfather. He had to paint, paint,
paint,? he says with obvious relish.
4
1GT
Wednesday September 13 2017 | the times
fashion
The colours, the cuts
and the see-through
dress: New York?s
10 big trends (and
one hot new model)
T
From power florals to futuristic silver
leather, sugary candy shades to the
new athleisure ? Anna Murphy rounds
up the best looks from Fashion Week
he good news from
New York Fashion
Week: practically every
trend hitting the stores
for autumn/winter will
still be around next
summer. So you can
buy now and repeat.
The bad news, depending on your
sartorial predilections: those trends
include unwaisted one-colour dresses
? some might say tents ? and Pied
Piper of Hamelin booties.
But bear with me. Those dresses
can be belted (so shoot me, September
fashion police, but next season you
are allowed to have a waistline, so
why not start now?) and thus can be
a flatteringly feminine way to update
your wardrobe (H&M?s comes in sky
blue or dark pink, �.99, hm.com,
& Other Stories? in orange, �,
stories.com).
Plus those kitten-heeled, pointy-toed
boots are a one-stop way to make all
those outfits you have been wearing
since forever ago look suddenly fresh
(especially if you go for a look-at-me
style, such as Kurt Geiger?s navy
satin, sequinned Rokkas, �9,
kurtgeiger.com, or Zara?s red leather
take, �.99, zara.com; just keep
everything else about your person
dialled down).
Accessories top tip number two? A
patterned handbag. A great way to add
excitement to an otherwise workaday
ensemble. The one worn by Leandra
Medine, aka the Man Repeller, came
courtesy of Prada. Pick up yours from
Furla?s new Fashion Week Collection
(like the grey, black and white Petalo,
�0, furla.com).
What else? Jeans, jeans, jeans. I can
report that the battle of the denim ?
What cut? What finish? ? has for
now been won by a straight-leg,
classic-blue wash with a hem that?s
almost imperceptibly frayed (the least
scary, most real-world iteration I have
sweets came in jars and fillings were
a point of pride. Victoria Beckham
mixed strawberry bonbon-pink with
Orbit-green and parma-violet mauve.
As did Sies Marjan, a rising star.
There was more of Hyacinth Bucket?s
favourite shade at Tibi, with two
lilac numbers among the signature
one-colour gowns.
RETRO
SHEER
Tom Ford
Ulla Johnson
Shiny happy people
Cindy Crawford?s daughter Kaia
Gerber in Alexander Wang
come across is Raey?s Press style, �0,
matchesfashion.com). To hit the
fashion jackpot, wear your pair under
one of the aforementioned dresses,
with said boots and bag. Just maybe
not to the supermarket.
Here are the ten trends to watch
from New York Fashion Week.
Candy crush
Even that most hard-edged of fashion
cities has come over all tooth-tingling,
with a colour palette last seen when
Never one for austerity chic, Tom
Ford showcased here a silver leather
top-and-trousers combo, there a liquid
mercury V-neck knit (not literally, that
would be a bad idea). The Row ? the
Olsen twins? brand, which offers a
more minimalist take on the ultra-luxe
? stuck to a smattering of silvered
trench plus a soup鏾n of fishnet
silver tunic. Diane von Furstenberg ?
now designed by Jonathan Saunders
? and Prabal Gurung showed dresses
in shimmering tech fabrics with
just a whiff of the shell suit about
them. Did I just say shell suit?
Of course not. (There was the
real deal on offer at Rihanna?s
Fenty x Puma. Only to be worn
if you are, in fact, Rihanna.)
Most covetable in the glitter
stakes were the Dorothy slippers at
Oscar de la Renta and ? especially
? at Victoria Beckham, where a
bow-fronted midi-heel mule came
in red (of course), plus pink, silver
and green. Be prepared to get in line
for the last behind a certain six-yearold, though. ?Harper already has two
pairs on order,? her mother told me
before the show. ?I am getting her a
flat version made.?
The rise of Cindy Mark II
On the subject of mothers and
daughters, didn?t that beauteous
young filly opening the Alexander
Wang show look strangely
familiar? Yep. Because it was Kaia
Gerber, the 16-year-old offspring of
FLORALS
Kate Spade
Ci d C
Cindy
Crawford,
f d and
d a perfect
f
mini-me of all-American
fabulosity. She made her catwalk
debut at Calvin Klein this week
? with her mother looking
on from the front row ? and
followed it up with the Wang
show-cum-flashmob in a
street in Brooklyn. (Wang won
the battle of the big names
generally, with Kendall Jenner
and Bella Hadid also in the line-up.)
Sporty spicing
Athleisure is showing no signs of
going anywhere, but it now
presents more as a flourish to an
otherwise grown-up look rather than
as the main attraction. At Tibi, navy
and green shirt dresses came with a
subtly elasticated waist. Calvin Klein
tweaked its ensembles with poppers
here, drawstrings there.
You can still go full Harlem
Globetrotters should you so desire:
Tom Ford showed mauve and orange
leather tracksuits, no less. Back in the
real world, just sling on a bomber
jacket, as demoed at Kate Spade (over
the times | Wednesday September 13 2017
5
1GT
fashion
la Renta?s rainbow of embellished tulle
gowns with purely comme il faut
amounts of flesh exposure were the
most red-carpet-ready statements of
the week.
Waist not want not
Come spring, it?s the waist that
will be the body part du jour. Better
get whittling pronto. (In New York
the fashion crowd?s fitness regimen
of choice is hip-hop yoga at the
Y7 Studio.)
At Prabal Gurung there were slashes
at the waist of brightly coloured
dresses. (Warning: just because Gigi
Hadid can pull it off, doesn?t mean you
can.) Ditto at Jonathan Simkhai and
Jason Wu, where the palette was more
low-key, but the attitude was similarly
gut-busting. The bra top ? and by
extension the bare abdomen again ?
was the order of the day at Alexander
Wang and Milly.
Thankfully there?s a middle
road: the belt. Diane von Furstenberg?s
looked more like jewellery ?
intricate assemblages of hoops,
patterned leather and multicoloured
silken scarves.
The power floral
BARE WAIST
SCARLET
SPORTY
Jason Wu
Oscar de la Renta
Calvin Klein
Now that the fashion industry has
worked out how to make florals look
modern, even kick-ass, of course it
isn?t going to abandon the trend in
a hurry. It?s all about giving what?s
pretty a 21st-century edge.
At Diane von Furstenberg,
outr� tropicals bloomed over
1970s-style frocks and jumpsuits.
Computerised bouquets were
abstracted across corrugated
white crepe at Tibi.
Red-on-white jacquards were
reversed at Carolina Herrera,
while Zimmermann played
with fabric twists as well as
pleats, juxtaposing two, even
three different sunshine prints
in one dress. At Jason Wu the
flower-strewn chiffons were offset
with mesh, or slivers of flesh. At
Kate Spade an embroidered diagonal
of flowers elevated a black trench
or bustier dress.
The trench: it isn?t going
anywhere
COVER AND BELOW: GETTY
IMAGES; REX/SHUTTERSTOCK
a fl
florall d
dress)) and
d Ad
Adam Li
Lippes
(chinoiserie-patterned trews).
Scarlet (and pink) ladies
You had better get your head around
red because this season?s favourite
hue is shaping up to be next season?s
too. If for autumn/winter it?s all about
the coat (buy yours from Marks
& Spencer Autograph, �9,
marksandspencer.com), for
spring/summer it?s the frock ? as seen
with a vengeance at Calvin Klein, a
collection inspired, the designer Raf
Simons said, by the American dream
and the American nightmare. A Grace
Kelly-ish gown had been reinvented
in red waterproof nylon. Then there
was the cream cocktail dress adorned
with blood-like splashes. Not for the
faint-hearted.
The cult New York label Monse
showed a red off-the-shoulder dress
worn over jeans and a deconstructed
bustier number in a checked red that
might be mistaken for a picnic blanket.
Easier by far were the gorgeous shirt
dresses at Victoria Beckham and
Tome. Then there was the Lady
Tech
fabrics
had just
a whiff
of the
shell
suit
about
them
HIGH SHINE
Diane von Furstenberg
G
di
l floorsweeper
fl
i d
Godiva-style
tunic
dress
at the Row, where there were more
tantalising glimpses of red skirting
under dusky coats. That fabulous pink
and red clash-match was out in force
elsewhere, at Sies Marjan in the form
of a tomato shearling chubby worn
over a blush slip, and at Oscar de la
Renta in sharp tailored ensembles.
Red and pink. So wrong, so right.
Clear thinking
Transparency is a thing next
season, in fashion if in nothing
else. At Victoria Beckham pale
organza pencil skirts and
sheath dresses were layered
over checked separates. At
Ulla Johnson, a stealth
brand popular with the
fashion pack, pretty white
cotton frocks revealed
just a whisper of big
pant. (In the real world,
wear with a slip dress.)
At Jonathan
Simkhai there was
more white, this time
macram�. Oscar de
Perma-trend number 602: the trench.
Haven?t got one? Now is the season to
buy. Although, that said, next season
it?s all about a point of difference.
Victoria Beckham?s was covered with
ruffles and rendered in silk, the better
to not be remotely useful in the rain.
Tory Burch?s military-ish beauty had
gold spherical buttons and a leather
belt, while Kate Spade?s tweaked taupe
classic was beltless, with generous
sleeves and a swooping Audrey
Hepburn cut.
Any decade, as long as it
suits you
At Tory Burch it was Talitha Getty
in 1960s Marrakesh, complete with
djellaba. At Tom Ford it was 1990s
glamazon (again). Diane von
Furstenberg delivered 1970s glamour
in screen-printed lurex: hippy-trippy
handkerchief-hem dressing with a
whole new edge. Similarly, new-gen
fabrics were used to reinvent the
1950s at Calvin Klein. (Good luck
managing the nine-to-five in that
rubber day dress.)
How to make sense of it all? Pick
the shape(s) that work best for your
body. Fashion, smashion. It?s all
about you, this season, next season,
happily-ever-after season.
the times | Wednesday September 13 2017
7
1GT
fashion
REX/SHUTTERSTOCK;
GETTY IMAGES
From left: model Helena Christensen,
blogger Caroline Daur, model Leonora
Jim閚ez, Gigi Hadid in Isabel Marant?s
A/W17 show, blogger Freddy Harper,
entrepreneur Miroslava Duma
�5 a pair! The sock market soars
You?ve bought the frocks ? now get the socks. Hattie Crisell on the rise of high-end hosiery
W
hat?s your
average
expenditure
on a pair of
socks? A
tenner?
Twenty
quid at a
push? Then it?s time to rejig your
budget, because with a slightly more
generous �5 you could pick up one
pair of Dolce & Gabbana wool-blend
socks embellished with crystals and
gold buttons (net-a-porter.com).
If you?re surprised that there are
people willing to pay this much for
hosiery, you haven?t been paying
attention. Insane as it may sound to
those whose sock drawers, like mine,
are a mismatched jumble of single
survivors, posh socks are the new
frontier of luxury fashion. We can
thank Gucci?s creative director,
Alessandro Michele, for this: at his
autumn 2016 show models wore midcalf striped socks with skirts, and the
fashion world hasn?t looked back.
Browse the street-style galleries and
And are
you ready
for sock
boots?
you?ll find the influential likes of Erin
O?Connor (supermodel), Leandra
Medine (founder of the Man Repeller
blog) and Pernille Teisbaek (stylist)
out and about in socks and frocks.
Socks? appeal is at its peak.
The idea is to wear an eye-catching
(fishnet, patterned, bright or sparkly)
pair with a knee-length or midiskirt,
leaving some visible bare leg ? and
this is the time of year to do it, before
tights become a practical requirement.
But if it?s all too St Trinian?s for you
there?s a much easier way: wear your
socks under cropped trousers with
brogues, high heels or trainers. A flash
h
of intriguing fabric goes a long way.
At Browns the buying team has seen
a huge increase in customer interest in
this category and as a result the store
is stocking 1,300 pairs for autumn 2017,
compared with less than 150 this time
last year. Stand-outs include a fuchsia
cotton Balenciaga pair for a hefty �
(brownsfashion.com); these truly are
showbiz chaussettes.
But some of the most wanted
options on the market are sports
X �5,
Balenciaga
at net-aporter.com
X �5,
Senso at
harvey
nichols.
com
From left: �5, Dolce &
Gabbana; �5, Gucci
X �.99,
reserved.com
socks, elevated to high fashion by the
addition of surprising details and
embellishments ? and, frankly, by
being bloody expensive. Almost half of
Net-a-Porter?s sales in this department
are driven by Vetements, the painfully
cool Parisian design collective, which
has collaborated with Reebok to
produce sports socks with LEFT and
RIGHT stitched into the feet. Don?t
reserve them for the gym, though:
they?re � a pair and the model on
the website is wearing them with high
heels (net-a-porter.com).
Lyst, a global fashion search engine,
reports that everyone is looking for
Gucci socks. The most popular are the
brand?s beige and brown knee-highs
marked with knitted Gs (they look like
something you?d have complained
about wearing at school; they cost
�5) and a pair of white sports
socks with a jewelled and tasselled
bow (�5, both lyst.com). The
sequinned, striped style was clicked on
3,000 times last week. Givenchy?s
intarsia tube socks (�7-�0) and
Rick Owens?s cashmere socks are also
X �,
aldoshoes.com
the subject of a lot of furious searching
? the latter are reduced from �8 to
�6, which I think we can all agree is
an absolute steal.
If all you want is flair, you don?t have
to spend designer prices. Look Mate is
a subscription company that sends a
pair of socks a month, starting at � a
pop (lookmate.co); its designs feature
colourful (and non-naff) illustrations.
Happy Socks has a collection called
Hysteria that includes cashmere,
slinky nylon and sparkly versions
(from �.95, happysocks.com); the
American brand Stance has a
collaboration with Rihanna, so for
�.37 you can buy two pairs, each
depicting the pop star in one of her
most famous outfits (stance.com).
But if you ? like half the attendees
of fashion week ? want to flash the
right pair of designer stockings to
communicate that you are in the
know, there?s nothing for it but to
splash the cash. And if anyone should
dare to criticise, just tell them, of
course, to put a sock in it.
Instagram: @hattiecrisell
X �.99,
zara.com
X �.99,
shop.mango.
com
8
1GT
Wednesday September 13 2017 | the times
arts
A wily politician,
a playful risk-taker
? a theatrical titan
Benedict
Nightingale, the
Times theatre
critic (1990-2010),
salutes Peter Hall
A
bout 25 years ago,
when Peter Hall was
turning 60, I asked
him if he had any
special worries or
concerns. He said he
was feeling happy
and fulfilled, but, he
added, ?there?s just one blot on my
landscape?. I asked him what. ?Death,?
was the reply. He couldn?t bear the
idea of the work he loved ceasing.
Well, he didn?t end up ?keeling over
in the playhouse?, as he told me he
hoped he would, but he was still
directing at the age of 80. Here was a
man who defied the Grim Reaper even
when he was battling age and arthritis,
a man who once said that his great joy
was to keep rehearsing plays, operas,
everything, for as long as he possibly
could. ?People say the theatre?s so oldfashioned, so clumsy,? he continued. ?I
say give me six actors, three days and
a room, and I?ll give you something
that could fire your imagination.?
When I last interviewed him he was
preparing to fire imaginations with the
two parts of Shakespeare?s Henry IV,
the highlights of a Peter Hall season in
Bath in 2011. He had enough strength
only for a morning rehearsal and
handed the afternoon over to an
assistant, but his enthusiasm for the
project was as great as ever.
Indeed Dominic Dromgoole, who
worked alongside him when his Peter
Hall Company took over the Old Vic
in 1997, once told me that his delight in
Sir Peter Hall, who died on Monday
the theatre was like that of a ?big kid?.
That struck me as an answer to those
of his enemies who saw him as
another Richelieu, a commanding and
sinister figure who wielded far too
much power over the British theatre.
I met him in 1974, when I was a cub
critic on the New Statesman and had
just written a leader attacking the idea
of trapping the National Theatre
company, which he?d just taken over,
in a concrete Oz on the South Bank.
?It bit deep and went on distressing
me all day,? he wrote in his diaries.
However, that didn?t stop him greeting
me amiably and showing me round
the almost finished building: Cottesloe,
Lyttelton and an Olivier that I
remember him comparing excitedly to
the great amphitheatre at Epidaurus.
In other words he was a nicer,
warmer, more forgiving man than
those jealous of his success cared to
believe. The Hall I got to know and
like was far from the ?rancid ball of
pig?s fat? that Jonathan Miller called
him, an attack that provoked an
American sitting opposite him on the
Tube to say: ?I don?t know who Peter
Hall is, but I?m sure glad I?m not him.?
Nor was he the man who Kenneth
Tynan, the eminent critic and the
National Theatre?s dramaturg under
Laurence Olivier, told me was
?interested in nothing but money?.
If that were true, why didn?t he follow
the example of his prot間� Trevor
Nunn, the director of Cats and Les
Mis閞ables? Why did he give up
directing megabucks musicals after
his production of Jean Seberg flopped
in 1983?
Not that he wasn?t sometimes the
wily politician as he struggled to keep
an embattled National Theatre
financially afloat. In his book My Life
in Pieces Simon Callow tells a story of
Hall trying to keep him at the National
by suggesting he would be cast as the
lead in a play by the Austrian
dramatist Johann Nestroy that was
being adapted by Tom Stoppard.
Callow ran into Stoppard after
agreeing to stay and asked him
how the project was proceeding.
?Who?s Nestroy?? asked Stoppard.
?In the 1960s I was the youngest
director,? Hall told me when we
spoke on his 60th birthday, ?so
maybe one day I?ll be the oldest.? If
he didn?t quite achieve the second
of those hopes ? Peter Brook is
still with us and still working ? the
first was no boast. This was the man
who was aged 24 when he
introduced British audiences to
Samuel Beckett with a hugely
controversial production of Waiting
for Godot, all of 29 when he created
the Royal Shakespeare Company and
in his early thirties when he directed
the RSC?s first great successes:
Hamlet, with David Warner playing
the prince as a very modern student,
and The Wars of the Roses, his and
John Barton?s brilliantly vivid version
of Shakespeare?s Henry VI plays.
I first encountered his work as a
critic in 1965, when The Guardian sent
David Warner and
Estelle Kohler in
Peter Hall?s Hamlet at
Stratford Theatre, 1965
m to review the world premiere of
me
Ha
Harold
Pinter?s The Homecoming in
Cardiff.
There were walkouts during
Ca
the
th performance, as there were
when
wh Hall?s production moved to
Brighton.
And as I realised when I
Br
sat
sa down to pen a first-night review
in a nearby hotel?s lounge, trying to
ignore
people yelping ?Bloody
ign
disgusting?,
?What did it mean??
dis
and
an ?Why didn?t they send us
Hamlet
instead??, Pinter?s picture
Ha
of a callous, brutish and probably
criminal London family had
cr
deeply
shocked its first audience.
de
That also showed that, though
he once told me that he never
chose
a play or started rehearsals
ch
without
feelings of terror, Hall
wi
wasn?t
unwilling to take risks. He
wa
demonstrated
that again and
de
again
as a director and a
ag
producer,
producer most famously when he
presented Howard Brenton?s Romans
in Britain at the National in 1980,
declaring the play ?a strong indictment
of imperialism that touched a
contemporary nerve?.
the times | Wednesday September 13 2017
9
1GT
DONALD COOPER; DAVID FARRELL/GETTY IMAGES; REX/SHUTTERSTOCK; ERIC GREENWOOD; RICHARD CANNON/TIMES NEWSPAPERS LTD
arts
He was
a nicer,
warmer
man than
those
jealous of
his success
cared to
believe
Above: The Oresteia
in 1981. Left: Waiting
for Godot in 1955 with
Peter Woodthorpe
as Estragon, Michael
Walker as Boy and Paul
Daneman as Vladimir.
Above right: Ian
Richardson as Oberon
and Judi Dench in
A Midsummer Night?s
Dream in 1968. Below:
Paul Massie as Brick
and Kim Stanley as
Maggie in Cat on a
Hot Tin Roof in 1958
Sir Peter, as he had become, would
probably have preferred it if the scene
that led to Mary Whitehouse?s abortive
prosecution of the director Michael
hael
Bogdanov ? the anal rape of a
druid by Caesar?s soldiery ? had
d
occurred behind a tree or deep
in the shadows at the back of
the stage. But he deferred to
Bogdanov and Brenton?s
determination to be open and
graphic. So doing, and thus
defying threats of financial
sanctions from the leader of
the Greater London Council,
Hall made it clear that a
relatively new National Theatree
was an independent organisation
n
that wouldn?t shy from tackling
controversial subjects or offending
ing
its audiences.
For Sir Peter, faithfully serving a
playwright and respecting his or her
intentions was an imperative. I saw
many of his 220-odd professional
productions ? a record, surely, for
a major director ? and I cannot
recall anything tricksy, clever-clever
or self-serving about one of them.
Perhaps he took regard for
Shakespeare in particular almost too
far, deploring performers? refusal to
respect iambic verse as they strove to
make the words ?real?, but he knew
how to bring a play to life, how to get
the best out of an actor or actress.
My memories of his finest
productions are themselves proof of
the diversity of his taste. They range
from a version of Aeschylus?s Oresteia,
complete with masks, to Pinter?s
Old Times, Betrayal and, with John
Gielgud and Ralph Richardson at
their best, No Man?s Land; from the
Albert Finney Hamlet to David Hare?s
Amy?s View; from The Merchant of
Venice, with Dustin Hoffman as
Shylock, to Alan Ayckbourn?s hilarious
Bedroom Farce; from Wilde?s Ideal
Husband, with Martin Shaw bringing
unexpected wisdom to a character
who could merely have spouted
witticisms, to Ronald Harwood?s
The Dresser.
Dres
The last time I saw Hall was
at his 80th birthday party at
the National. He personally
greeted scores of guests,
gre
shaking
hands, sharing
sha
memories and exuding
me
bonhomie. But it was too
bo
much.
mu Asked to reply to
celebratory
speeches by his
cel
successors,
Richard Eyre and
suc
Trevor
Trev Nunn, he stood smiling
on
and simply asked
on a podium
p
for
of which there were
for questions,
fo
ques
few.
fe Did it matter? Not at all. We all
fe
knew
were celebrating the most
k
new we w
important ttheatre person of our era.
main paper, pages 52-53
Obituary, m
10
Wednesday September 13 2017 | the times
1GT
television & radio
They?ve still got va-va-vroom: driving at 100
ITV
James
Jackson
TV review
100 Year Old
Driving School
ITV
{{{((
Great British Bake Off
Channel 4
{{{{(
W
hat do you do when
you start to feel as if
your age is edging
towards that of
Methuselah? The
stereotypical image suggests your basic
option is watching TV all day every day,
a flatscreen from Currys your lifeline
to an outside world in which you once
starred. Well, that?s balderdash. There
are 100,000 motorists over 90 out
and about, and 248 over 100, some
speeding along on mopeds.
Radio Choice
Catherine Nixey
The Documentary
World Service, 11.30am
Forget the Tour de France.
What serious cyclists are
really interested in is the
Vuelta a Colombia. It
travels along hairpin
bends and hair-raisingly
precipitous drops from
near sea level up to 11,000ft
and is one of the most
challenging rides in
the world. Everyone in
Colombia loves it ?
even the guerrillas, who
apparently used to pause
from their busy schedules
to watch, rifles in hand.
Unreliable Evidence:
Housing Law
Radio 4, 8pm
Does our legal system strike
the right balance between
the rights of tenants and
landlords? ?No,? we all
must assume, post-Grenfell.
Yet, as this programme
explains, what the law says
is, to an extent, irrelevant.
The Grenfell Action Group
residents? association raised
fire safety concerns in
2013, sought legal advice
and found that there
was no legal aid available.
Legislation means that
a legal claim arises only
where the rented property
is in ?disrepair? and
not if inappropriate
materials have been used
in its refurbishment.
That?s a far more inspiring thought
and, as 100 Year Old Driving School
showed, not at all slightly worrying
when you discover what careful
drivers centenarians are ? even when
freewheeling down hills or refusing to
get their bust wing mirrors repaired.
?The younger have more accidents,?
John Errol Manners, 102, said. ?The
old? You learn to be more careful.?
John has been driving since 1935
and, like the other subjects in this
sprightly hour about elderly individuals
taking voluntary driving assessments,
was impressive less for his motoring
skills than his positive attitude.
The ?not dead yet? quotes flowed as
freely as tea at a bingo hall. ?Nobody
this age acts like a 16-year-old, but I
do,? said Jock Stares, who was seen
celebrating his 101st birthday by getting
on his moped and zooming with
purpose to meet his son Roger (73) for
a bit of speedboat racing. Jock has been
driving for 94 years and his love of life
is truly an example to us all, though it?s
perhaps a relief that he has given up
his ambition to ride the wall of death.
Jack Hearn, who at 93 still exercises
his judo sensei-master skills (he?s a
ninth-dan black belt), summed up the
overall outlook that you need to ?get
up off your butt and do something?.
Thank heavens that, by the end, none
of the driving-test assessors had
confiscated any keys. All the drivers
talked of their cars as ?lifelines?, and
Radio 1
FM: 96.7-99.8 MHz
6.33am The Radio 1 Breakfast Show with
Nick Grimshaw 10.00 Clara Amfo 12.45pm
Newsbeat 1.00 Scott Mills 4.00 Greg James
5.45 Newsbeat 6.00 Greg James 7.00 Annie
Mac 9.00 The Surgery with Katie & Dr
Radha. Tackling listeners? sex and STIs
queries 10.02 Huw Stephens 1.00am
Benji B. Electronic music 4.00 Adele Roberts
Radio 2
FM: 88-90.2 MHz
6.30am Chris Evans 9.30 Ken Bruce 12.00
Jeremy Vine 2.00pm Steve Wright 5.00
Simon Mayo 7.00 The Folk Show with Mark
Radcliffe. Traditional and contemporary folk
and acoustic music, with interviews and live
sessions 8.00 Jo Whiley. A mix of new music
and classic tracks, with guests dropping in to
the studio to chat 10.00 CMA Music Festival
2017. Highlights from the country music
festival in Nashville, this year celebrating its
46th anniversary 11.00 The Great American
Songbook. Leo Green celebrates the work of
the songwriter Sammy Cahn, whose hits
include Come Fly with Me, Be My Love, The
Tender Trap and Three Coins in the Fountain
(r) 12.00 Pick of the Pops (r) 2.00am
Radio 2 Playlists: Country Playlist 3.00
Radio 2 Playlist: Easy 4.00 Radio 2 Playlist:
Radio 2 Rocks 5.00 Vanessa Feltz
Radio 3
FM: 90.2-92.4 MHz
6.30am Breakfast
Petroc Trelawny presents Radio 3?s breakfast
show, featuring listener requests. Including
7.00, 8.00 News. 7.30, 8.30 News Headlines
9.00 Essential Classics
Suzy Klein explores potential companion
pieces for Maurice Ravel ? Bol閞o. Plus, Sir
Simon Rattle talks about the in?uences that
are important to him as he returns to the UK
12.00 Composer of the Week:
Alexander Goehr
Donald Macleod focuses on the middle years
of Alexander Goehr?s life, a time when he
found his own unique musical path, and
discusses his formation of the Music Theatre
Ensemble. Alexander Goehr (Das Gesetz der
Quadrille ? The Law of the Quadrille ?
Songs after Kafka, Op 41; Paraphrase on the
dramatic madrigal Il Combattimento di
Tancredi e Clorinda by Monteverdi, Op 28;
A Musical Offering; and I Squeezed Up the
Stair ? Sing, Ariel, Op 51)
1.00pm News
Jock Stares went speedboat racing to celebrate his 101st birthday
1.02 Radio 3 Lunchtime Concert
John Toal presents highlights from the 22nd
West Cork Chamber Music Festival, featuring
the Norwegian violinist Henning Kraggerud
and the Hungarian pianist D閚es V醨jon
performing works by Grieg and Schumann.
Grieg (Violin Sonata No.1 in F major, Op.8);
and Schumann (Fantasiest點ke, Op.12)
2.00 Afternoon Concert
Penny Gore introduces a performance which
took place last New Year?s Eve at the Berlin
Philharmonie, under the conductor Sir Simon
Rattle. Kabalevsky (Overture ? Colas
Breugnon); Rachmaninov (Piano Concerto
No 3 in D minor, Op 30); William Walton arr
Simon Rattle (Orchestral Pieces ? Fa鏰de);
Dvor醟 (Slavonic Dances, Op 72 ? excerpts)
3.30 Choral Evensong
Recorded in St Alban?s Church, Holborn,
London by Genesis Sixteen for the Eve of
Holy Cross Day. Introit: Vere languores
(Victoria). Responses: Bernard Rose. Of?ce
Hymn: When I Survey the Wondrous Cross
(Rockingham). Psalm 66 (Atkins). First
Lesson: Isaiah 53 vv 1-12. Magni?cat sexti
toni (Victoria). Second Lesson: Ephesians 2
vv 11-22. Nunc Dimittis (Plainsong).
Anthem: Vexilla Regis (Guerrero). Final
Hymn: My Song Is Love Unknown (Love
Unknown). Organ Voluntary: Prelude on
?Vexilla Regis? (Bairstow)
4.30 In Tune
With Beatrice Rana and Ute Lemper
6.30 Composer of the Week:
Alexander Goehr (r)
7.30 Radio 3 in Concert
The Mariinsky Orchestra and the Royal
Scottish National Orchestra combine in this
concert from the Usher Hall in Edinburgh.
Proko?ev (Symphony No 1 in D, Op 25 ?
Classical); Britten (Variations on a Theme of
Frank Bridge); Daniil Trifonov performs
Rachmaninov (Variations on a Theme of
Corelli, Op 42); and Shostakovich (Symphony
No 4 in C minor, Op 43)
10.00 Free Thinking
Philip Dodd looks at the prints of K鋞he
Kollwitz as they go on display in Birmingham
at the Ikon Gallery, an exhibition that
gathers together 40 drawings and prints
10.45 The Essay: Paradise Lost
Alice Goodman explores Milton?s epic 350
years after it was published
11.00 Late Junction
Highlights of performances by left ?eld
R&B artist Klein, alongside lute and
drum duo Xylouris White, recorded
on the Late Junction stage at the
End of the Road festival
12.30am Through the Night (r)
Radio 4
FM: 92.4-94.6 MHz LW: 198kHz MW: 720 kHz
5.30am News Brie?ng
5.43 Prayer for the Day
5.45 Farming Today
5.58 Tweet of the Day
6.00 Today
News headlines and sport with Sarah
Montague and Nick Robinson
8.30 (LW) Yesterday in Parliament
9.00 The English Fix
The long history of anxiety over threats to
English identity (3/4)
9.30 Owning Colour
Five colours that have been at the centre of
ownership and trademark battles (1/5) (r)
9.45 (LW) Daily Service
9.45 Book of the Week:
South and West
By Joan Didion (3/5)
10.00 Woman?s Hour
Discussion and interviews presented by Jane
Garvey. Including at 10.41 the 15 Minute
Drama: The Pursuits of Darleen Fyles (3/5)
10.56 The Listening Project
A cyclist discusses how a near fatal accident
had a lasting impact
11.00 Taken To The Cleaners
Britain?s army of cleaners and some of the
people they clean for meet for the ?rst time
11.30 Relativity
Margaret and Ken invite the family round to
celebrate their wedding anniversary (2/4)
12.01pm (LW) Shipping Forecast
12.04 Home Front
By Sebastian Baczkiewicz
12.15 You and Yours
1.00 The World at One
1.45 Whodunnit: The Calendar
Conspiracy (3/5)
2.00 The Archers (r)
2.15 Drama: A Question of Judgment
By Ryan Craig. A school on a council estate is
devastated by a gas explosion
3.00 Money Box Live
With Louise Cooper
3.30 In Sickness and In Social Care
Dr Kevin Fong explores ways to improve the
social care needs of the elderly (2/2) (r)
4.00 Thinking Allowed
Thought-provoking issues
4.30 The Media Show
The latest news from the media world
5.00 PM
6.00 Six O?Clock News
6.30 Ankle Tag
Bob gets a job as a bingo caller (4/4)
7.00 The Archers
Jennifer hears more than she bargained for
the brief mentions of lost spouses
reinforced what an imperative it is for
them to retain independent transport.
These moments hinted at a more
serious point, about the epidemic of
loneliness, slightly lost amid the
programme?s forced jolliness.
In fact, wouldn?t it be good if there
were a documentary about our elders
that didn?t include music once heard in
Carry On at Your Convenience? Was
the oompah music there to encourage
us to laugh? That?s riding a rather thin
line between cheerful and patronising,
a bit like John?s car wandering the
centre line in the road.
Week three of The Great British
Bake Off and it was bread week,
which meant two things: it must have
smelt great in the big tent and Noel
Fielding was, despite himself, going to
make a remark about Kate?s nice buns.
Fielding is starting to ease into the
role, if not exactly turning up in a
Cossack finger-biscuit outfit just yet,
and the heat on the innuendos is being
dialled up a bit too. During Prue Leith
and Paul Hollywood?s constipationinducing task of trying out all the
doughy creations, the silverback judge
was reduced to a heap of laughter over
a phallic snail bread-sculpture.
It?s all so relaxed, good-natured and,
yes, British as to feel bulletproof, such
that even the sight of Sandi Toksvig
moonwalking seems just fine.
james.jackson@thetimes.co.uk
7.15 Front Row
Arts programme, presented by Kirsty Lang
7.45 The Pursuits of Darleen Fyles
By Esther Wilson (3/5) (r)
8.00 Unreliable Evidence
Clive Anderson and guests explore legal
issues highlighted by the Grenfell Tower ?re.
See Radio Choice (1/4)
8.45 David Baddiel Tries to Understand
The comedian tries to understand the
technology of fracking (2/6)
9.00 Costing the Earth
Tom Heap explores new developments in
battery technology (r)
9.30 The English Fix
The long history of anxiety over threats to
English identity (3/4) (r)
10.00 The World Tonight
10.45 Book at Bedtime:
Crime Down Under ? The Dry
By Jane Harper. Falk?s assumptions are
shaken, about both the past and the present.
Read by Richard Goulding (8/10)
11.00 The John Moloney Show
For once it is John, not Edward the cat, who
needs medical intervention (4/4)
11.15 Before They Were Famous
The surprising early careers of
celebrated authors (3/6) (r)
11.30 Today in Parliament
Political news presented by Sean Curran
12.00 News and Weather
12.30am Book of the Week:
South and West (r)
12.45 Sailing By
12.48 Shipping Forecast
1.00 As BBC World Service
Radio 4 Extra
Digital only
8.00am The Navy Lark 8.30 Hancock?s Half
Hour 9.00 Genius 9.30 Winston 10.00 The
Pallisers 11.00 Modern Welsh Voices 11.15
The Trial 12.00 The Navy Lark 12.30pm
Hancock?s Half Hour 1.00 Morning, Noon and
Night by Claire-Louise Bennett 1.30 Fixing a
Hole 2.00 The Siege 2.15 Charisma: Pinning
Down the Butter?y 2.30 South Riding 2.45
Vanished Years 3.00 The Pallisers 4.00
Genius 4.30 Winston 5.00 Odd Balls 5.30
Ankle Tag 6.00 Before the Screaming Begins
6.30 Off the Page 7.00 The Navy Lark.
Comedy with Leslie Phillips. First aired in
1959 7.30 Hancock?s Half Hour 8.00
Morning, Noon and Night by Claire-Louise
Bennett. Claire-Louise Bennett?s shortlisted
tale 8.30 Fixing a Hole. The life and times of
roadworks in Britain 9.00 Modern Welsh
Voices. Snowstorm by Niall Grif?ths
9.15 The Trial. By Peter Whalley 10.00
Comedy Club: Ankle Tag. The bath has sprung
a leak, and Gruff wants to book an ethical
plumber 10.30 The Secret World. The private
lives of public people 10.55 The Comedy Club
Interview. A chat with a guest from the
world of comedy 11.00 Nick Mohammed:
Apollo 21. Sketch show from Nick
Mohammed. From November 2009 11.30 The
Nick Revell Show. Nick gets a lucky break
Radio 5 Live
MW: 693, 909
6.00am 5 Live Breakfast 10.00 5 Live Daily
with Adrian Chiles 1.00pm Afternoon
Edition 4.00 5 Live Drive 6.30 5 Live Sport.
Mark Chapman looks ahead to this evening?s
UEFA Champions League matches 7.45 5 Live
Sport: Champions League Football 2017-18.
Commentary on one of this evening?s
matches 10.00 5 Live Sport: 5 Live Football
Social. Reaction to this evening?s ?xtures
10.30 Sam Walker 1.00am Up All Night
5.00 Reports 5.15 Wake Up to Money
talkSPORT
MW: 1053, 1089 kHz
6.00am The Alan Brazil Sports Breakfast
10.00 Jim White 1.00pm Hawksbee and
Jacobs 4.00 Adrian Durham and Darren
Gough 7.00 Kick-off 10.00 Sports Bar
1.00am Extra Time with Adam Catterall
6 Music
Digital only
7.00am Shaun Keaveny 10.00 Lauren
Laverne 1.00pm Mark Radcliffe and
Stuart Maconie 4.00 Steve Lamacq 7.00
Marc Riley 9.00 Gideon Coe 12.00 6 Music
Recommends with Mary Anne Hobbs
1.00am The Record Producers 2.00 Long
Players 2.30 6 Music Live Hour 3.30
6 Music?s Jukebox 5.00 Chris Hawkins
Classic FM
FM: 100-102 MHz
6.00am More Music Breakfast 9.00 John
Suchet 1.00pm Anne-Marie Minhall 5.00
Classic FM Drive 7.00 Smooth Classics 8.00
The Full Works Concert. Alexander Armstrong
showcases some of Durham?s acclaimed
music, including pieces by Garth, Avison and
Francisco Tarrega. Garth (Cello Concerto No 6
in G); Lord (Durham Concerto); Tarrega
(Recuerdos de la Alhambra); Patrick Hawes
(Fair Albion); Avison (Concerto No 1 in A);
and Will Todd (Stay with me, Lord) 10.00
Smooth Classics 1.00am Sam Pittis
the times | Wednesday September 13 2017
11
1GT
DONALD COOPER; HELEN MAYBANKS
Concert
Emily Askew Band
Slaughtered Lamb, EC1
Theatre
The Knowledge
Charing Cross Theatre, WC2
P
T
{{{{(
erhaps some things never
change. Miri It Is, one of
the songs in Emily Askew?s
opening set, written in
Middle English, dates from
the 13th century yet deals with a topic
that modern audiences will have no
difficulty understanding: the vagaries
of the weather. It didn?t take a great
leap of the imagination to picture
ourselves huddled over a fire in some
hostelry in ye olde London.
The quartet?s programme carried us
much farther afield, from France to
Germany, Spain and Portugal,
blending wistful introspection with,
occasionally, the raw energy of
a ceilidh. Askew, as some readers may
remember, was part of the Elizabethan
Session, a glorious meeting of past
and present that yielded one of the
outstanding concerts and recordings
of 2014. Anyone who was present at
the Hatfield House premiere will
cherish the memory of the petite
musician corralling her arsenal of
period instruments.
What makes her new project so
intriguing is the instinctive approach it
takes to bridging the gap between folk
and early music. Her group, which
includes another versatile soloist in
John Dipper, deserves to catch the ear
of non-folkies who have always made
a point of keeping a couple of David
Munrow albums in their collection.
One of the exuberant themes Askew
performed at Hatfield resurfaces on
her new band?s album, Alchemy, part
of a crowd-funded venture that also
includes ? for those who want to try
their hand at playing ? a tune book.
The live versions of the pieces were
every bit as exuberant, Dipper?s viola
d?amore providing a brisk
counterpoint to Askew?s pipes, vielle
and surprisingly forceful recorder.
Jamie Roberts?s acoustic guitar
generated subtle propulsion alongside
a percussive armoury ? including
a cajon and a set of medieval bells ?
calmly overseen by Simon Whittaker.
Askew?s sister, Hazel, made a brief
but potent guest appearance on harp
in the second set. There was an
a cappella excursion too, and at the
close the rhythms of Allez � la foug鑢e
cheerily sent us on our way into
the night.
Clive Davis
Theatre
The March on Russia
Orange Tree, Richmond
M
{{{{(
r and Mrs Pasmore are
celebrating their 60th
wedding anniversary,
or, rather, their three
middle-aged children are
determined to celebrate for them.
David Storey?s 1989 play The March
on Russia showed us the last survivors
of an old mining community retired
in a cosy, lonely bungalow as
Thatcherism marched on around
them. Alice Hamilton?s well-judged
revival keeps the political history alive,
but refocuses Storey?s play as a gentle
elegy to modern old age. The 21st
century is creating a generation of
artsfirst night
{{(((
Michael Fabiano as Rodolfo and Nicole Car as Mim� in Richard Jones?s Royal Opera production
No bohemian rhapsody
This routine
new Puccini
staging is saved
by outstanding
musical values,
says Richard
Morrison
Opera
La boh鑝e
Covent Garden
{{{((
Five stars for
Scythians at the
British Museum
First Night, main paper
E
very opera house needs
a heart-wringing, durable
production of La boh鑝e, if
only for commercial purposes.
Nothing entertains affluent
old people more than the spectacle of
starving young people dying to Puccini.
For 41 years the Royal Opera had
such a production. Unfortunately the
show that opens its new season isn?t it.
Two years ago John Copley?s muchloved staging was finally sent the way
of poor Mim� in the opera. In its place
comes a production by Richard Jones
that is neither brazenly radical nor
meticulously rooted in period, neither
breathtakingly picturesque nor
shockingly stripped down. In fact, the
first adjective that springs to mind is
routine and the second is dull.
True, Jones?s set designer, Stewart
Laing, has one purple patch of
inspiration, turning Act II into a
sliding parade of glittering Parisian
exteriors. Even that, however, causes
irritation. If he can lavish so much
detail on the Latin Quarter, why just
a minimalist roof, as atmospheric as
an Ikea bookcase, for the bohemians?
attic? And if those Act II sets can be
whisked across the stage with hightech efficiency, why does it take ages
to push that roof back into position for
Act IV, imposing a hiatus when the
tragedy should be gaining intensity?
people who reach retirement age while
still caring for their parents. So the
time feels right to revive this
bittersweet vignette about a couple
whose greatest tragedy ? despite
two world wars, multiple pit
accidents and brushes with the
workhouse ? is living long
enough to witness their children?s
disappointments.
At the heart of Hamilton?s
staging is a terrific performance by
Ian Gelder. Gelder plays Tom,
Yorkshire grit through and through.
Except that he?s not Tom, but always
Mr Pasmore, in tribute to a time when
the working classes had pride and
politesse. Pride and dignity are the
warp and weft of this story. Storey had
an ear for the rhythms of domestic
bickering; Hamilton matches it with
a knack for articulating emotion in the
rituals of domestic life. Who makes
Sue Wallace as
Mrs Pasmore in David
Storey?s 1989 drama
Even Jones?s handling of the main
characters gets off to a shaky start,
with Nicole Car?s Mim� collapsing in
a faint as soon as she meets Michael
Fabiano?s Rodolfo ? perhaps knocked
out by his Colgate smile ? then just as
suddenly springing up again. It must
be said, however, that after this dodgy
meeting the central figures are much
more believably depicted.
And ? redeeming features at last!
? the show is very well cast,
passionately accompanied by the
Royal Opera orchestra under Antonio
Pappano?s peerless direction and
vibrantly sung. The star turn is
undoubtedly Car, who touchingly
conveys the joy, naivety, then growing
panic of the doomed heroine, with
a surge of lustrous timbre ready for the
big moments. Fabiano doesn?t have
a comparable vocal ease, but his
hipsterish poet is subtly subverted;
more concerned with cultivating his
grief, it seems, than with comforting
his dying girlfriend.
Simona Mihai?s petulant, high-onsomething Musetta is a galvanising
stage presence (it will be fascinating to
see how she converts into Mim� later
in this run) and Mariusz Kwiecien is
an ideal foil as a volatile Marcello. It?s
an OK night in far-from-gay Paree,
but this staging won?t run for 41 years.
Box office: 020 7304 4000, to Oct 10
the toast ? and how ? has never
seemed so loaded with tension.
Sophia Simensky?s costumes
artfully delineate just how far each
of the siblings has come from their
roots. Colin Tierney?s smooth,
unsettled Colin has spent enough
time in universities to mask his
accent; divorced local councillor
Wendy, superb Sarah Belcher, still
has Macclesfield vowels, but sharp
tailoring. Only Connie Walker?s
graceless Eileen, all over-eager smiles
and seething resentment, is swathed in
hand-me-down lumpy sweaters, being
the wife of an unsuccessful teacher.
The title refers to one of Tom?s war
stories, touched on only lightly. But
everything is touched on lightly in this
gentle handling, a rare example of
subtlety in kitchen-sink family drama.
Kate Maltby
Box office: 020 8940 3633, to Oct 7
elevision plays don?t
come much better than
The Knowledge. Jack
Rosenthal?s 1979 paean to
the humble London cabbie
? it feels more like an elegy in the
age of Uber ? followed four plucky
souls as they grappled with learning
the knowledge (memorising the
London A-Z, essentially). It featured
a cracking ensemble cast, with a truly
memorable performance from Nigel
Hawthorne as the unnerving
examiner, Mr Burgess.
Stage plays, thankfully, come rather
better than The Knowledge, Simon
Block?s faithful, affectionate and
all-too-reverent adaptation of
Rosenthal?s work ? directed, for the
first time on stage, by Rosenthal?s
widow, Maureen Lipman. Despite the
clear love for the work and the relish
with which the cast get their mouths
around Rosenthal?s finely crafted lines,
this nice but dull recession-era
comedy neither convinces of its
modern-day relevance nor evokes
a sense of time or place.
That is despite the designer Nicolai
Hart-Hansen?s insistent set, with its
EastEnders-title-sequence flooring and
London street names dangling from
the ceiling. There are scattered
references throughout to the dole,
unemployment and Pat Jennings, but
the grime and the hopelessness are
absent. It looks rather as though they
are playing out a 1970s sitcom in
a quirky branch of Habitat.
The performances, however, are
generally on the money. Fabien
Frankel as the gormless Chris, James
Alexandrou as the cowboy odd-job
man Gordon, and Ben Caplan as the
The comedy fails
to evoke a sense
of time or place
bookish Ted are solid. However, they
are often outshone by their female
counterparts ? Block, wisely, has
beefed up the wives? and girlfriends?
roles ? particularly the excellent
Alice Felgate. However, the stodgy
feminist speech he lumps in the
mouth of the female cabbie, Miss
Staveley, is a clanger.
The main disappointment is Steven
Pacey as Burgess, although, in fairness,
Hawthorne left an all but impossible
act to follow. Pacey is a fine actor,
but he lends the supposedly feared
examiner the air of an eccentric
show-off, all funny voices, officious
twitches and cocked eyebrows.
Burgess is known as the Vampire;
here he is the Clown. You would more
likely leave his office bored to tears
by his antics than awed. The script
renders him rather sentimental too.
It doesn?t fit.
For an exercise in nostalgia, and
as a reminder of the wonderful
Rosenthal, The Knowledge does
nicely. However, if you?re after some
authentic theatre that shows you the
earthier side of London life, save the
cab fare and take the night bus.
Chris Bennion
Box office: 08444 930650, to Nov 11
12
1GT
Wednesday September 13 2017 | the times
television & radio
Viewing Guide
Joe Clay
Mountain: Life
at the Extreme
BBC Two, 9pm
The Andes
is the longest
continental
mountain
range in the world ?
three times the length
of the Himalayas ?
stretching through
three four-month-old
cubs must make a kill
every four days ? a
sudden mist provides
the ideal cover for an
ambush. In the Bolivian
Andes there is the Salar
de Uyuni, 4,000 square
miles of nothing except
10 billion tonnes of salt
crystals. The aerial
shots are jaw-dropping.
The central Andes
was once home to the
Inca empire and the
drone-cam lingers over
the granite buildings
at Machu Picchu. In
the Peruvian highlands
the descendants of the
Incas come together
to weave rope from
the hardy mountain
grasses. We also
encounter a spectacled
bear, the Andes? most
elusive animal, and
the only birds in the
world that build their
nests on a glacier.
Stella
Sky1, 9pm
The warm-hearted
Valleys comedy-drama
by Ruth Jones returns
for a sixth and final
series, with life up in
the air for Stella. She
has a new baby to look
after, a son heading
off to university and
a big decision to
make ? Michael has
been offered a job in
Dubai. Can she leave
Pontyberry? Stella has
always been a curious
show; at times the
melodrama and clunky
dialogue make you
wonder what the appeal
is. Then Jones dumps
the characters into
a pokey terraced
house for a party and
it comes alive, almost
like a 21st-century
Under Milk Wood.
Chris Bennion
BBC One
BBC Two
ITV
Channel 4
Channel 5
Early
the planet?s largest salt
flats and a 200-mile
stretch of ice fields.
To start, we get a
spectacular bird?s-eye
view from the
perspective of a
South American
condor, a bird with
a 3m wingspan. In
the southern Andes
animals must learn to
adapt to the changing
weather. A female
puma caring for her
6.00am Breakfast 9.15 Council House Crackdown. How a
businesswoman cheated the authorities out of a council
?at 10.00 Homes Under the Hammer. The team explores
properties in Scotland?s Greenock, London and
Nottinghamshire (r) 11.00 Dom on the Spot. Dominic
Littlewood joins En?eld environmental crime of?cers
Frankie and April 11.45 Thief Trackers. What can happen
if you leave your valuables on display in a car 12.15pm
Bargain Hunt. From the Norfolk Showground (r) (AD)
1.00 BBC News at One; Weather 1.30 BBC Regional
News; Weather 1.45 Doctors. Ayesha returns for her ?rst
day back at work, and Jimmi does not know who to
believe when a patient claims his abusive former wife
attacked him, but she protests her innocence (AD) 2.15
The Boss 3.00 Escape to the Country. Searching for a
country home in rural Gloucestershire (AD) 3.45 Garden
Rescue. Charlie Dimmock and the Rich brothers transform
a garden in Crumpsall (AD) 4.30 Celebrity Money for
Nothing. Sarah Moore and Jay Blades rummage through
the homes of Jon Culshaw and Mark Dolan 5.15
Pointless. Quiz show with Alexander Armstrong 6.00 BBC
News at Six; Weather 6.30 BBC Regional News; Weather
6.00am Flog It! Trade Secrets (r) 6.30 Council House
Crackdown (r) 7.15 Garden Rescue (r) (AD) 8.00 Sign
Zone: World?s Busiest Cities ? Hong Kong (r) (AD, SL)
9.00 Victoria Derbyshire 11.00 BBC Newsroom Live
11.30 Daily Politics 1.00pm For What It?s Worth (r) 1.45
Coast (r) 2.00 Glorious Gardens from Above (r) 2.45
Who Do You Think You Are? Jerry Hall discovers how her
father?s family, who were originally from Oldham, ended
up in the United States, and ?nds out about a connection
to the American folk hero Daniel Boone (r) (AD) 3.45
Great British Railway Journeys. Michael Portillo travels
from Littlehampton to the New Forest (r) (AD) 4.15
Human Planet. A look at mankind?s ability to survive in
extreme environments, featuring visits to locations in
remote parts of the world to see how people adapt to
their surroundings (r) (AD) 5.15 Flog It! The antiques
experts Charlie Ross and Thomas Plant peruse a selection
of locals? potentially valuable items on a visit to the Fleet
Air Arm Museum at HMS Heron in Yeovilton, Somerset
(r) 6.00 Richard Osman?s House of Games. Angela
Scanlon, Clive Myrie, Sara Pascoe and Rick Edwards test
their general knowledge skills 6.30 Eggheads. Quiz show
6.00am Good Morning Britain. A lively mix of news and
current affairs, plus health, entertainment and lifestyle
features 8.30 Lorraine. Guests and chat with Lorraine
Kelly 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle Show. Guests air their
differences 10.30 This Morning. Phillip Scho?eld and
Holly Willoughby present chat and lifestyle features,
including a look at the stories making the newspaper
headlines and a recipe in the kitchen 12.30pm Loose
Women. Another helping of studio discussion from a
female perspective, featuring interviews 1.30 ITV News;
Weather 2.00 Judge Rinder. Cameras follow the criminal
barrister Robert Rinder as he takes on real-life cases in a
studio courtroom 3.00 Dickinson?s Real Deal. David
Dickinson and the team head to Clitheroe in Lancashire,
where Simon Schneider hopes to grab a handsome horse?s
head box (r) 4.00 Tipping Point. Ben Shephard hosts the
quiz in which contestants drop tokens down a choice of
four chutes in the hope of winning a �,000 jackpot 5.00
The Chase. Bradley Walsh presents as four contestants
answer general knowledge questions and take on ruthless
quiz genius the Chaser to secure a cash prize 6.00
Regional News; Weather 6.30 ITV News; Weather
6.00am Countdown (r) 6.45 The King of Queens (r) 8.00
Everybody Loves Raymond (r) 9.00 Frasier (r) 10.05
Ramsay?s Kitchen Nightmares USA (r) 11.00 Coast vs
Country. A couple with con?icting ideas seek a new home
in Devon (r) 12.00 Channel 4 News Summary 12.05pm
Couples Come Dine with Me. Three couples from the West
Country compete for the cash prize of �000 (r) 1.05
French Collection. Three rival collectors head to Pezenas,
France, to search for items to upcycle 2.10 Countdown.
With Janet Street-Porter in Dictionary Corner 3.00 Cheap
Cheap Cheap. Game show hosted by Noel Edmonds 4.00
A Place in the Sun: Home or Away. A couple want to
downsize their home in Bolton, but are undecided
whether they would prefer to live in the seaside resort of
Lytham St Annes, or southern Brittany 5.00 Come Dine
with Me. Four contestants host dinner parties in Leeds
6.00 The Simpsons. Grampa gives each member of the
family $50, and Lisa anonymously donates her money to
Nelson to support his dream of making custom bicycles
(r) (AD) 6.30 Hollyoaks. Sienna and Kim lie that they
have a wedding dress ?tting, but Grace knows something
is up. Meanwhile, Brody makes a decision about Lily (AD)
6.00am Milkshake! 9.15 The Wright Stuff. Matthew
Wright and his guests talk about the issues of the day
11.15 Can?t Pay? We?ll Take It Away. Paul and Steve call
for urgent police back-up after opening a locked wooden
case they ?nd while carrying out an eviction notice at a
?at in London?s Docklands (r) 12.10pm 5 News
Lunchtime 12.15 The Hotel Inspector. Alex Polizzi visits
The Richmoor Hotel in Weymouth, Dorset, where the
manager employs some of her children, but her mothering
instincts have been getting in the way of business (r)
1.10 Access (r) 1.15 Home and Away (AD) 1.45
Neighbours (AD) 2.20 The Mentalist. A man working on
cutting-edge drone technology dies when his car explodes,
and Jane gets his best clue yet to the identity of Red John
when the serial killer strikes again (r) 3.15 FILM: Wall
of Silence (TVM, 2016) When a student goes missing,
her mother goes in search of her, but discovers abuse of
authority stemming all the way to the government.
Thriller with Ireland Baldwin 5.00 5 News at 5 5.30
Neighbours. Xanthe gets caught up in Yashvi?s deception
(r) (AD) 6.00 Home and Away. Brody tells Justin what
made him turn to drugs (r) (AD) 6.30 5 News Tonight
7PM
Top
pick
seven South American
countries: Venezuela,
Colombia, Ecuador,
Peru, Bolivia,
Argentina and Chile.
For the final part of this
series, the BBC natural
history unit reveals
how life ? human and
animal ? survives in
the harsh and varied
environments that can
be found across the
length of the Andes,
including cloud forests,
7.00 The One Show Live magazine hosted
by Matt Baker and Alex Jones
7.00 This Farming Life As winter arrives,
Stevie experiments with a radical
buffalo feeding idea, and Robin and
Penny?s family arrive in the Highlands
for the annual festive ceilidh (4/12)
7.00 Emmerdale Vanessa struggles with a
secret, Debbie is on the back foot, and
Kerry spots an opportunity (AD)
7.00 The Nightmare Neighbour Next
Door A Birmingham mother and son
whose peaceful life was ruined when
their neighbours started to chop away
at a bush shared by their properties
? leading to a knife attack (r)
8.00 Celebrity MasterChef The
contestants take part in the ?rst of
the semi-?nals, and face their biggest
challenge yet as they cook for 120 staff
and volunteers at the Royal National
Lifeboat Institute (9/12) (AD)
8.00 World?s Busiest Cities: Moscow
Dan Snow, Anita Rani and Ade
Adepitan go behind-the-scenes to
reveal the systems and people running
the city of Moscow, the biggest and
busiest city in Europe (3/4) (AD)
8.00 Love Your Home and Garden In the
?nal episode of the series, Alan
Titchmarsh transforms a home and
garden in Chester for retired couple
Richard and Ann Price (3/3) (AD)
8.00 Location, Location, Location
Kirstie Allsopp and Phil Spencer are
house-hunting in Croydon, with Kirstie
helping friends Joe, Will and Joe get
their feet on the property ladder in
London. Meanwhile, Phil searches for
an affordable property with the space
to start a family for Leon and Cherrelle
8.00 GPs: Behind Closed Doors
Doctors treat a man suffering from
agoraphobia, triggered by a violent
assault months before, and a young
girl is brought in after developing a
worrying rash on her arms (AD)
9.00 How to Stay Young New series. In a
time where people are living longer but
not ageing well, volunteers go through
experiments in an attempt to reverse
the ageing process (1/3) (AD)
9.00 Mountain: Life at the Extreme The
?nal episode focuses on life on the
longest mountain range in the world,
the Andes, home to astonishing hidden
worlds, and extraordinary animals and
people. See Viewing Guide (3/3) (AD)
9.00 Long Lost Family Inge Dart, 66,
hopes to be reunited with her long-lost
daughter, from whom she was
separated just days after giving birth.
Davina McCall and Nicky Campbell
present (4/8) (r)
9.00 Grand Designs Kevin McCloud meets
Penny Talelli and Mark Edwards, who
plan to combine their love of old and
contemporary architecture as they
transform a derelict Victorian
gatehouse in London (AD)
9.00 Can?t Pay? We?ll Take It Away
Agents try to recover almost �000
owed by the owner of a bridal shop in
London, while of?cers in Kent chase
over �000 of vet fees after two
neighbouring dogs got into a ?ght
10PM
8PM
7.30 Coronation Street Gary shares his
woes with an unexpected listener.
Meanwhile, Maria suspects Adam and
Eva are up to something (AD)
9PM
7.30 Rip Off Britain Consumer affairs
show tackling issues around the UK
7.00 Channel 4 News
10.00 BBC News at Ten; followed by BBC
Regional News and Weather and
National Lottery Update
Late
11PM
10.45 A Question of Sport
With Sarah Storey, Graeme Swann,
Mark-Lewis Francis and Sam Tomkins
11.15 Live from the BBC Ivo Graham
performs stand-up comedy (5/6)
11.45 Who Do You Think You Are? The
actress Lisa Hammond investigates her
paternal grandfather?s experiences in
the Second World War, before tracing
back through her mother?s side of the
family (9/10) (r) (AD)
12.50am-6.00 BBC News
10.00 The Other One A comedy about two
sisters who share the same name.
See Viewing Guide (AD)
10.00 ITV News at Ten
10.00 Back The Nichols family gathers
together to read Laurie?s will. Comedy
with David Mitchell (2/6) (AD)
10.30 Newsnight Presented by Evan Davis
10.30 Regional News
10.40 Uefa Champions League
Highlights A round-up of the
matchday one ?xtures, which tonight
included Liverpool v Sevilla, Feyenoord
v Manchester City, and Tottenham
Hotspur v Borussia Dortmund. Plus, a
look at all of last night?s games,
featuring Manchester United v FC
Basel, Celtic v Paris Saint-Germain,
and Chelsea v FK Qarabag
10.35 The Secret Life of the Holiday
Resort A look at life at an all-inclusive
Holiday World Resort in Malaga, Spain,
seeing what Britons get up to while on
holiday in the sun and what it takes to
keep them happy (1/2) (r)
12.10am Play to the Whistle Holly Willoughby returns
with the sports-themed comedy panel show (r) 12.40
Jackpot247 3.00 May the Best House Win. The
property-comparing contest arrives in Manchester (r) (SL)
3.50 ITV Nightscreen 5.05-6.00 The Jeremy Kyle Show.
Guests air their differences over family issues (r) (SL)
12.35am 24 Hours Inside Your Body 1.30 FILM:
The Hole (12, 2009) Joe Dante?s horror starring Chris
Massoglia, Haley Bennett, Nathan Gamble and Teri Polo
3.00 Location, Location, Location (r) (SL) 3.55 Selling
Houses with Amanda Lamb (AD) 4.50 Building the Dream
(r) (AD) 5.45-6.00 Kirstie?s Handmade Treasures
11.15 Sir Peter Hall Remembered
Judi Dench, Ian McKellen, Vanessa
Redgrave, Trevor Nunn and many
others look back at the extraordinary
life and career of the acclaimed
director, Peter Hall. See Viewing Guide
12.15am Horizon: Mars ? A Traveller?s Guide
Experts discuss where they would go on Mars if they had
the chance (r) 1.15 Sign Zone: Plane Drunk ? Panorama
(r) (SL) 1.45 Who Do You Think You Are? The actor Noel
Clarke starts his search in Trinidad (r) (AD, SL) 2.45-3.45
Astronauts: Do You Have What It Takes? (r) (AD, SL)
11.35 Educating Greater Manchester
The team helps a girl who is risking her
future at the school by constantly
?ying off the handle (2/8) (r) (AD)
10.00 Most Shocking TV Moments
Compilation show counting down some
of television?s most memorable
moments, from Tom Cruise jumping on
Oprah?s sofa to declare his love for
Katie Holmes, to the drunken
chat-show antics of Oliver Reed. The
programme also features the time
when the Bee Gees stormed off the set
of Clive Anderson All Talk, as well as
Will Young getting the better of Simon
Cowell on Pop Idol. Featuring
contributions by Duncan James, Liz
McClarnon, Suzanne Shaw, Anne
Diamond, Eamonn Holmes and Esther
Rantzen among others (r)
12.55am SuperCasino 3.10 The Hotel Inspector:
Checking In, Checking Out. Alex Polizzi returns to the
Atlantic House Hotel in Bude, Cornwall (r) 4.00 Criminals:
Caught On Camera (r) (SL) 4.45 House Doctor. A country
cottage in Northamptonshire (r) (SL) 5.10 Great Artists.
Albrecht Durer (r) (SL) 5.35-6.00 Nick?s Quest (r) (SL)
the times | Wednesday September 13 2017
13
1GT
television & radio
Taskmaster
Dave, 9pm
When cast well, this
comedy panel show is
bulletproof TV and it?s
particularly good this
time, with Aisling Bea,
Bob Mortimer, Sally
Phillips, Nish Kumar
and Mark Watson
proving excellent value.
Alex Horne sets the five
comedians a variety
of ingenious and daft
challenges, adjudicated
by Greg Davies with
varying degrees of
sarcasm. The best
task is giving Horne
a ?special cuddle?, for
which Bea dresses up
as a ?sexy cuddle bot?,
while Mortimer invites
him into the boot of
his Audi. ?I hate this
programme,? Kumar
shouts at one point.
?I wish I?d gone to
law school.? The legal
profession?s loss is
comedy?s gain.
The Other One
BBC Two, 10pm
This new sitcom pilot
written by Holly Walsh
(Motherhood) stars
Ellie White and Lauren
Socha as sisters who
had no idea the other
existed until their dad
drops dead. The pair
(both called Catherine
Walcott) are chalk and
cheese, but are thrown
together in grief. Cathy
(White) is uptight and
works in insurance,
while Cat (Socha)
works for Deliveroo
and guzzles energy
drinks. It aims for
the sort of bittersweet,
naturalistic comedy
that Stefan Golaszewski
(Mum) does so well,
but it doesn?t quite
hit the mark.
Sir Peter Hall
Remembered
BBC Two, 11.15pm
If you missed this
tribute to the theatre
director Peter Hall
? it was shown last
night on BBC Four ?
then here is a second
chance. Judi Dench,
Ian McKellen, Vanessa
Redgrave and Trevor
Nunn are among
those celebrating
the great man?s career.
But where could they
even start? Running
the Royal Shakespeare
Company aged 29?
His celebrated tenure
at the National
Theatre? Founding the
Rose Theatre, Kingston
aged 72? Hall was a
visionary, but, perhaps
inspired by his humble
beginnings, one with
the most extraordinary
work ethic. CB
Sport choice
BT Sport 3, 7pm
Tottenham Hotspur
begin their Champions
League campaign with
a home match against
Borussia Dortmund
at Wembley Stadium
(kick-off 7.45pm). Also
tonight, Liverpool host
Sevilla (BT Sport 2,
7pm), while Manchester
City face Feyenoord
(BT Sport ESPN, 7pm).
Sky1
Sky Atlantic
Sky Living
Sky Arts
Sky Main Event
Variations
6.00am Hawaii Five-0. Double bill (r) 8.00
Monkey Life. Double bill (r) (AD) 9.00 The Dog
Whisperer (r) (AD) 10.00 Nothing to Declare (r)
10.30 Border Security: America?s Front Line (r)
11.00 NCIS: Los Angeles (r) 12.00 Hawaii
Five-0 (r) 2.00pm NCIS: Los Angeles (r) 3.00
Supergirl (r) 4.00 Stargate SG-1 (r) 5.00
Futurama (r) 5.30 Modern Family (r)
6.00 Modern Family (r)
6.30 The Simpsons. Triple bill (r)
8.00 Freddie Down Under. Andrew Flintoff and
Rob Penn visit Sydney and Melbourne (r) (AD)
9.00 Stella. New series. Return of the comedy
starring Ruth Jones. See Viewing Guide
10.00 Colony. A surprise attack brings chaos to
the Greenzone. Josh Holloway stars
11.00 Air Ambulance ER. A roofer picks up a
nasty leg fracture in a fall (5/6) (r)
12.00 A League of Their Own (r) (AD) 1.00am
The Force: Manchester (r) (AD) 2.00 Zoo (r)
3.00 Motorway Patrol (r) 4.00 Animal 999 (r)
5.00 The Dog Whisperer (r) (AD)
6.00am Richard E Grant?s Hotel Secrets (r) (AD)
8.00 The Guest Wing (r) (AD) 10.00 The West
Wing. Double bill (r) 12.00 Without a Trace (r)
1.00pm CSI: Crime Scene Investigation (r) 2.00
Blue Bloods (r) (AD) 3.00 Fish Town (r) 4.00
The West Wing. Double bill (r)
6.00 Without a Trace. Special episode told from
the perspective of a missing boy?s parents (r)
7.00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation. A man is
accused of murdering his wife and son (r)
8.00 Blue Bloods. Danny and Erin clash when a
case is reopened (r) (AD)
9.00 Ray Donovan. Terry takes Damon to
New York to train for a ?ght (5/12)
10.10 I?m Dying Up Here. Goldie pitches
an idea at her poker game
11.20 The Sopranos. Tony keeps up the haggling
over the Esplanade pro?ts and Carmela makes a
date she can not keep. Drama with Edie Falco (r)
12.35am The Sopranos. Carmela throws Tony
out (r) 2.10 Ray Donovan (r) 3.20 Without a
Trace (r) 4.15 The West Wing. Double bill (r)
6.00am 60 Minute Makeover (r) 7.00 Nothing
to Declare (r) 8.00 Million Dollar Listing: NYC
(r) 9.00 Road Wars (r) 10.00 Border Security:
Canada?s Front Line (r) (AD) 11.00 Cold Case (r)
12.00 Bones (r) (AD) 1.00pm Criminal Minds.
Double bill (r) 3.00 Cooks to Market (r) 3.15
Stop, Search, Seize (r) 4.15 UK Border Force (r)
(AD) 5.15 Nothing to Declare (r)
6.15 Nothing to Declare (r)
6.45 My Kitchen Rules: Australia
8.00 Sun, Sea and A&E. British tourists
hospitalised abroad (r) (AD)
9.00 Criminal Minds. Brides-to-be in Savannah
are being killed on the eve of their weddings (r)
10.00 Criminal Minds. Three employees are
killed during a robbery at a restaurant (r)
11.00 Criminal Minds. The team learns of a
killer incorporating corpses into graf?ti art (r)
12.00 Bones (r) (AD) 1.00am Nashville (r)
2.00 Stop, Search, Seize (r) (AD) 3.00 Criminal
Minds (r) 4.00 Sun, Sea and A&E (r) (AD) 5.00
Nothing to Declare. Double bill (r)
6.00am Brahms: Piano Concertos No 1 & No 2
8.00 Auction 8.30 Watercolour Challenge 9.00
Tales of the Unexpected (AD) 10.00 Nat King
Cole: Encore 10.45 Ludovico Einaudi: Elements
? Live 12.00 Discovering: Gary Cooper (AD)
1.00pm Tales of the Unexpected (AD) 2.00
Auction 2.30 Watercolour Challenge 3.00 South
Bank Masterclasses: Peter Lord 3.15 Laurel and
Hardy: Their Lives and Magic 5.00 Discovering:
Tina Turner (AD) 5.30 Discovering: Muse
6.00 Discovering: Natalie Wood (AD)
7.00 Fake! The Great Masterpiece Challenge.
From Manchester Art Gallery
8.00 Tony Visconti?s Unsigned Heroes. Stewart
Copeland joins the search for musical talent
9.00 FILM: Bessie (12, TVM, 2015) Drama
starring Queen Latifah and Tory Kittles
11.10 Ella Fitzgerald at Ronnie Scott?s
12.10am Bad Company 2.00 Tales of the
Unexpected (AD) 3.00 Auction 3.30
Watercolour Challenge 4.00 Darbar Festival
2015 5.00 The South Bank Show Originals
6.00am Total Goals 8.30 Live International
Netball: New Zealand v England (Centre-pass
8.45). Coverage of the third and ?nal ?xture in
the Taini Jamison Trophy, which takes place at
Claudelands Arena in Hamilton 10.30 Live
County Championship Cricket: Warwickshire v
Essex. Coverage of day two of the Division One
?xture, which takes place at Edgbaston
6.00pm Sky Sports News at 6
7.00 Sky Sports Tonight. Leading sports stories
7.30 Gillette Soccer Special. Julian Warren
introduces pre-match reports and news of all
tonight?s goals as they go in, while studio guests
keep an eye on the big games and talking points.
Plus, a classi?ed results round-up from all of
this evening?s ?xtures
10.00 The Debate. Discussion on the latest
Premier League news
11.00 Through the Night. The day?s talking
points and a look ahead to the events that are
likely to make the news tomorrow
12.00 Through the Night
BBC One N Ireland
As BBC One except: 9.00pm-10.00 Crash.
Following criminal investigations into fatal
crashes on Northern Ireland?s roads 10.40
Cricket Highlights. Ireland v West Indies 11.20
A Question of Sport. With Sarah Storey,
Graeme Swann, Mark-Lewis Francis and Sam
Tomkins 11.50 Live from the BBC. With Ivo
Graham 12.20am Who Do You Think You Are?
Lisa Hammond (r) (AD) 1.20-6.00 BBC News
BBC One Wales
As BBC One except: 7.30pm-8.00 Extreme
Wales with Richard Parks. New series. The
endurance athlete embarks on extreme
adventures across Wales
BBC Two N Ireland
As BBC Two except: 9.00pm How to Stay
Young. Volunteers are put through a series
of experiments in an attempt to reverse the
aging process 10.00-10.30 Spotlight. Social
and political issues (r) 12.15am-1.15
Mountain: Life at the Extreme (AD)
BBC Two Scotland
As BBC Two except: 2.00pm Great British
Railway Journeys. From Littlehampton to the
New Forest (r) 2.30 Politics Scotland
3.30-4.15 Glorious Gardens from Above (r)
BBC Two Wales
As BBC Two except: 11.15pm It?s My Shout:
Short Films from Wales. Lewis starts to
recognize himself in other people, and after
re?ecting on his past, he attempts to affect
the future by altering his outer ego 11.30
Sir Peter Hall Remembered. Looking back
at the life of acclaimed director Peter Hall
12.30am Horizon: Mars ? A Traveller?s
Guide (r) 1.30-1.45 Coast (r)
BBC Four
E4
More4
Film4
ITV2
7.00pm Beyond 100 Days. News and analysis
7.30 Brushing Up On: British Towers. A look at
Britain?s towers (3/4) (r)
8.00 Everyday Eden: A Potted History of the
Suburban Garden. The historian Michael Collins
examines what the horticultural havens mean to
society and looks back at how they have evolved
from the 1930s to the present day (r)
9.00 Andrew Marr?s The Making of Modern
Britain. Andrew Marr examines Britain?s role
in the Second World War, beginning with the
Battle of Dunkirk and how Winston Churchill
stirred the Blitz spirit (6/6) (r) (AD)
10.00 Sound Waves: The Symphony of Physics.
The singer Lesley Garrett joins the presenter
Dr Helen Czerski to examine sound (r) (AD)
11.00 Britain in Focus: A Photographic History.
Eamonn McCabe explores the development of
the art of photography in the UK (r) (AD)
12.00 Hidden Histories: Britain?s Oldest Family
Businesses (r) (AD) 1.00am How to Be
Bohemian with Victoria Coren Mitchell (r) (AD)
2.00 Everyday Eden: A Potted History of the
Suburban Garden (r) 3.00-4.00 Sound Waves:
The Symphony of Physics (r) (AD)
6.00am Hollyoaks (r) (AD) 6.30 Coach Trip:
Road to Zante (r) (AD) 7.00 Made in Chelsea:
Ibiza (r) (AD) 8.00 Melissa & Joey (r) 9.00 2
Broke Girls (r) (AD) 10.00 Baby Daddy (r)
11.00 How I Met Your Mother (r) (AD) 12.00
The Goldbergs (r) (AD) 1.00pm The Big Bang
Theory (r) (AD) 2.00 Melissa & Joey (r) 3.00
Baby Daddy (r) 4.00 2 Broke Girls (r) (AD) 5.00
The Goldbergs. Double bill (r) (AD)
6.00 The Big Bang Theory (r) (AD)
6.30 The Big Bang Theory (r) (AD)
7.00 Hollyoaks (AD)
7.30 Coach Trip: Road to Zante (AD)
8.00 My Hotter Half
8.35 My Hotter Half
9.00 Don?t Tell the Bride A groom decides to
turn his wedding into an obstacle course
10.00 Celebs Go Dating. Toff has second
thoughts about her date with a Scotsman (AD)
11.05 The Big Bang Theory (r) (AD)
11.35 The Big Bang Theory (r) (AD)
12.00 The IT Crowd (r) (AD) 1.05am Celebs Go
Dating (r) (AD) 2.10 First Dates Hotel (r) (AD)
3.05 Don?t Tell the Bride (r) 3.55 My Hotter
Half (r) 4.50 How I Met Your Mother (r) (AD)
8.55am A Place in the Sun: Winter Sun (r)
11.00 Four in a Bed (r) 1.40pm A Place in the
Sun: Winter Sun (r) 3.50 Time Team (r) 5.55
Amazing Spaces: Floating Homes (r) (AD)
6.55 The Secret Life of the Zoo. A giraffe is
about to give birth to her second calf (r) (AD)
7.55 Grand Designs. Kevin McCloud meets a
couple planning to build a glass pavilion
projecting over a loch. However, the stress of
the work begins to take its toll (1/6) (r) (AD)
9.00 999: On the Frontline. New series. Series
following an hour in the life of ambulance crews
in the West Midlands (1/10)
10.00 24 Hours in A&E. The team treats two
trauma patients arriving by helicopter on the
hospital?s new helipad. Eric, 75, fell from a
ladder, while IT consultant Mihhail crashed his
motorbike (6/8) (r) (AD)
11.05 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown.
Comedy panel show. Sean Lock and Stephen
Mangan take on Noel Fielding and Fay Ripley (r)
12.05am Ramsay?s Kitchen Nightmares USA. A
restaurant in Long Beach, California (r) 1.05 The
Perfect Penis (r) 2.05 999: On the Frontline (r)
3.10-3.50 8 Out of 10 Cats: Best Bits (r)
11.00am The Ladykillers (U, 1955) Ealing
black comedy starring Alec Guinness 12.50pm
Patti Cake$ Interview Special 12.55 Yangtse
Incident (U, 1957) Adventure with Richard
Todd (b/w) 2.45 The Comancheros (PG,
1961) Western starring John Wayne 4.55 The
Cockleshell Heroes (U, 1955) Second World
War drama 6.55 Dunkirk Interview Special
7.05 Unstoppable (12, 2010) Two train
operators must stop a runaway locomotive
carrying toxic chemicals before it causes a major
disaster. Action thriller with Denzel Washington
9.00 The Bourne Legacy (12, 2012) An
assassin goes on the run when his employers try
to bury their dark secrets by having him killed.
Spy thriller sequel starring Jeremy Renner
11.35 3:10 to Yuma (15, 2007) A rancher
escorts a notorious outlaw on a dangerous
journey to a station where a train will take the
prisoner to jail. Western starring Russell Crowe
2.00am-4.00 20,000 Days on Earth (15,
2014) Documentary about musician Nick Cave,
exploring his creative process by following him
over the course of one day, with contributions
from friends, family and collaborators
6.00am You?ve Been Framed! Gold (r) 6.25
Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records (r) 7.15
Below Deck (r) 8.00 Emmerdale (r) (AD) 8.30
Coronation Street (r) (AD) 9.30 The Ellen
DeGeneres Show (r) 10.20 Below Deck (r)
11.15 Dress to Impress (r) 12.20pm
Emmerdale (r) (AD) 12.50 Coronation Street (r)
(AD) 1.50 The Ellen DeGeneres Show 2.45 The
Jeremy Kyle Show (r)
6.00 Dress to Impress
7.00 You?ve Been Framed! Gold. Harry Hill
narrates camcorder calamities (r)
7.30 You?ve Been Framed! Gold (r)
8.00 Two and a Half Men (r)
8.30 Two and a Half Men (r)
9.00 FILM: Hot Fuzz (15, 2007) A zealous
policeman is relocated to a sleepy country
village, where a series of grisly so-called
accidents arouses his suspicions. Action comedy
starring Simon Pegg and Nick Frost (AD)
11.25 Family Guy (r) (AD)
11.55 Family Guy (r) (AD)
12.25am American Dad! Double bill (r) (AD)
1.25 Release the Hounds (r) 2.20 Teleshopping
5.50 ITV2 Nightscreen
ITV3
ITV4
Dave
Drama
Yesterday
6.00am Judge Judy (r) 6.40 Heartbeat (r) (AD)
7.40 Where the Heart Is (r) (AD) 8.40 Wild at
Heart (r) 9.40 Judge Judy (r) 11.05 Rising
Damp (r) 11.35 On the Buses (r) 12.40pm
Griff?s Great Britain (r) 1.10 Heartbeat (r) (AD)
2.15 Doc Martin (r) (AD) 3.15 Wild at Heart (r)
4.20 On the Buses. Double bill (r) 5.20 Rising
Damp (r) 5.55 Heartbeat (r) (AD)
7.00 Murder, She Wrote. Jessica sets out to
prove the innocence of an old friend who has
become the prime suspect for a murder that
occurred at a writers? awards ceremony (r) (AD)
8.00 Foyle?s War. The death of a conscientious
objector while in police custody prompts an
investigation ? and Foyle soon sees a link to an
attempt on the life of the judge who ordered his
arrest. Michael Kitchen stars (2/3) (r) (AD)
10.05 Law & Order: UK. A newborn baby goes
missing. James Wilby stars (6/8) (r) (AD)
11.05 Light?elds. Vivien discovers a mysterious
message on her typewriter (3/5) (r) (AD)
12.05am Colditz. Two-part drama starring Tom
Hardy (r) 1.55 Rising Damp (r) (SL) 2.20 ITV3
Nightscreen 2.30 Teleshopping
6.00am The Car Chasers (r) 6.45 Pawn Stars
(r) 7.30 The Saint (r) 8.35 Ironside (r) 9.40
Quincy ME (r) 10.40 Minder (r) 11.45 The
Avengers (r) 12.50pm The Saint (r) 1.50
Ironside (r) 2.55 Quincy ME (r) 4.00 Minder (r)
(AD) 5.00 The Avengers (r)
6.05 The Car Chasers. The team discovers a
treasure trove of four-wheel classics (r)
7.00 Pawn Stars. Items include a 1934
Rickenbacker guitar (r)
7.30 British Superbike Championship Highlights.
Action from all three races at Silverstone, where
the ninth round of the season took place
9.00 FILM: On Her Majesty?s Secret
Service (PG, 1969) Spy adventure starring
George Lazenby in his only outing as 007,
alongside Telly Savalas, Diana Rigg, Gabrielle
Ferzetti and Bernard Lee (AD)
11.55 FILM: Exit Wounds (18, 2001)
Thriller starring Steven Seagal, Isaiah
Washington and Tom Arnold (AD)
2.00 Ax Men. The Chapman team?s newest
recruit has a brush with death (r) (SL) 2.45
ITV4 Nightscreen 3.00 Teleshopping
6.00am Home Shopping 7.10 Scrapheap
Challenge Roadshow: Sofa Speedway 8.10
American Pickers 9.00 Storage Hunters UK
10.00 American Pickers 12.00 Jay Leno?s
Garage 1.00pm Top Gear (AD) 3.00 Brojects in
the House 3.30 Brojects 4.00 Motorway Cops
5.00 Top Gear (AD)
6.00 Top Gear (AD)
7.00 Motorway Cops. A burglar?s excuses leave
two of?cers dumbfounded
8.00 QI XL. Extended edition of Sandi Toksvig?s
?rst episode as host of the panel game
9.00 Taskmaster. New series. With Aisling Bea,
Bob Mortimer, Mark Watson, Nish Kumar and
Sally Phillips. See Viewing Guide
10.00 Would I Lie to You? With Sarah Millican,
Jon Richardson, David Harewood and Bob
Mortimer. Presented by Rob Brydon
10.40 Would I Lie to You?
11.20 QI. With Rory McGrath and Phill Jupitus
12.00 Would I Lie to You? 12.40am Mock the
Week 1.20 QI 2.00 Would I Lie to You? 2.40
Parks and Recreation. Double bill 3.30 The
Indestructibles 4.00 Home Shopping
7.10am The Bill 8.00 The Mrs Bradley
Mysteries 9.00 Pie in the Sky 10.00 Bergerac
11.00 The Bill 1.00pm Last of the Summer
Wine 1.40 Brush Strokes 2.20 Birds of a
Feather 3.00 The Mrs Bradley Mysteries 4.00
Pie in the Sky 5.00 Bergerac
6.00 Brush Strokes. Jacko?s womanising leads to
more troubles. Karl Howman stars
6.40 Last of the Summer Wine. Seymour offers
his services to the clergy
7.20 To the Manor Born. Audrey pretends to be
DeVere?s wife to impress a business associate
8.00 Inspector George Gently. The beaten body
of a German businessman is discovered in the
harbour, prompting Gently and Bacchus to
consider whether a barman?s anti-German
sentiments are a motive for murder (2/2) (AD)
10.00 New Tricks. Standing links the death of a
bookmaker?s father with the kidnapping of a
champion greyhound. Meanwhile, a widow
mounts a protest outside the station (6/8) (AD)
11.20 Birds of a Feather
12.00 The Bill 1.00am Vanity Fair 2.15
Garrow?s Law (AD) 4.00 Home Shopping
6.00am Antiques Roadshow 7.10 A Very
British Murder with Lucy Worsley (AD) 8.00
Codebreaker 9.00 Tenko 10.00 Time Team
2.00pm Secrets of War 4.00 Sharpe
6.00 Tenko. Blanche takes desperate measures
7.00 The Light of Dawn: The Normandy
Landings. Conclusion of the documentary about
the D-Day landings, exploring the political and
economic background to the plan and Hitler?s
strategies to thwart the attack
8.00 History?s Greatest Hoaxes. Revealing how
a famous photo of the Loch Ness Monster taken
in 1934 took the world by storm
9.00 Fawlty Towers. A party of German guests
comes to stay. John Cleese stars (AD)
9.40 Monty Python: The Meaning of Live.
Behind the scenes of the reunion concert (AD)
10.40 Goodnight Sweetheart. Gary crams two
assignations into a hectic day
11.20 Fawlty Towers. An abrasive guest
exasperates Basil (AD)
12.00 History?s Greatest Hoaxes 1.00am The
Light of Dawn: The Normandy Landings 2.00
Secrets of War 3.00 Home Shopping
STV
As ITV except: 10.30pm Scotland Tonight
11.05 Uefa Champions League Highlights. The
matchday one ?xtures, which tonight included
Liverpool v Sevilla 12.25am Teleshopping 1.25
After Midnight 3.00-3.50 Storage Hoarders (r)
UTV
As ITV except: 12.40am Teleshopping
1.40-3.00 ITV Nightscreen
BBC Alba
5.00pm Peppa (r) 5.25 Creag nam Buthaidean
(Puf?n Rock) 5.35 Ben & Hoilidh san Rioghachd
Bhig (Ben & Holly?s Little Kingdom) (r) 5.55
Donnie Murdo (Danger Mouse) (r) 6.10 Aithne
air Ainmhidhean (All About Animals) (r) 6.30
D� a-nis? (What Now?) 7.00 Sruth gu Sal
(Scotland?s Waterways) (r) 7.30 Speaking Our
Language (r) 7.55 Earrann Eachdraidh (History
Shorts) (r) 8.00 An L� (News) 8.30 Dualchas
a? Chaisteil (The Castle) (r) 9.00 Bothy Life
? Bothan nam Beann (r) 10.00 Ce騦 bho
Perthshire Amber 2016 (r) 10.20 Bannan (The
Ties That Bind) (r) 10.55-12midnight Turas
Tony: Reis Beinn Neibhis (r)
S4C
6.00am Cyw: Y Diwrnod Mawr (r) 6.15 Guto
Gwningen (r) 6.30 Sam T鈔 (r) 6.40 Twt (r)
6.50 Nico N鬵 7.00 Cacamwnci (r) 7.15
Olobobs 7.20 Digbi Draig (r) 7.35 Gwdihw (r)
7.50 Mwnci?n Dweud Mwnci?n Gwneud (r) 8.00
Ty Mel (r) 8.05 Sbarc (r) 8.20 Y Dywysoges
Fach (r) 8.35 Syrcas Deithiol Dewi (r) 8.45
Abadas (r) 9.00 Igam Ogam (r) 9.10 Oli Dan y
Don (r) 9.25 Chwedlau Tinga Tinga (r) 9.35
Cymylaubychain (r) 9.45 Llan-ar-goll-en (r)
10.00 Y Diwrnod Mawr (r) 10.15 Guto
Gwningen (r) 10.30 Sam T鈔 (r) 10.40 Twt (r)
10.50 Nico N鬵 (r) 11.00 Dysgu Gyda Cyw:
Rapsgaliwn (r) 11.15 Dysgu Gyda Cyw: Cwm
Teg (r) 11.20 Dysgu Gyda Cyw: Yr Ysgol (r)
11.35 Dysgu Gyda Cyw: Dwylo?r Enfys (r)
11.50 Dysgu Gyda Cyw: Da ?Di Dona (r) 12.00
News S4C 12.05pm Heno (r) 12.30 Garddio a
Mwy (r) 1.00 Y Dref Gymreig (r) 2.00 News
S4C 2.05 Prynhawn Da 3.00 News S4C 3.05 Yr
Afon (r) 4.00 Awr Fawr 5.00 Stwnsh: Ffeil
5.05 Stwnsh: Y Dyfnfor 5.25 Stwnsh: Ni Di Ni
(r) 5.30 Stwnsh: Llond Ceg ? Mwy O Gega!
6.00 News 6.05 100 Lle (r) (AD) 6.30 Celwydd
Noeth (r) 7.00 Heno 8.00 Pobol y Cwm (AD)
8.25 Chwys 9.00 News 9 9.30 Her yr
Hinsawdd (AD) 10.00 Rygbi Pawb 11.00 T鈔
(r) 11.30am-12.35 Tudur Owen a?r Cwmni (r)
14
Wednesday September 13 2017 | the times
1GT
What are your favourite puzzles in MindGames?
Email: puzzles@thetimes.co.uk
MindGames
times2 Crossword No 7443
1
2
3
4
5
Codeword No 3127
6
7
17
3
10
24
26
21
26
Scrabble � Challenge No 1957
14
23
8
10
2
10
26
7
5
21
19
10
26
13
8
7
17
9
10
3W
15
11 12
13
2L
3W
3L
9
14
26
21
23
10
11
2
10
1
10
19
9
10
26
12
13
14
23
14
18
5
10
2
9
15
13
10
23
6
14
4
14
2L
26
2
17
19
6
14
10
23
3
14
6
17
16
10
2L
3
25
16
15
15
16
17
18
19
22
12
10
10
23
5
25
3
23
12
9
10
5
25
10
9
5
10
14
11
25
2
7
10
24
17
8
24
14
2
17
18
2
5
9
25
23
BLOOTxY
16
What?s the highest score using
the X with this rack?
23
26
Ceases (5)
Musical composition (7)
Stamp collecting (9)
Greek letter in previous
answer (3)
10 Before the present (3)
11 Scorn (9)
12 (Of the sun) up (5)
Solution to Crossword 7442
S C
A R
T RE
N P
A T E
V
A S
T
L
A P E
L
N
E D
N E
T YR
A T
E
L L
E
P
H
HO
N
L E
ER
I
I S
S
RO
L
RE
S S
C
OGMA
I
R
ANNY
13 Eskimo language (5)
16 Roman governor (9)
18 Sphere (3)
20 Fitting (3)
21 Conduit for rainwater (9)
22 Fodder plant (7)
23 Cavity within a bone (5)
Down
25
17
24
25
26
19
10
17
3
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
23
24
25
26
G
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
I
E
F
G
H
Fill the grid so
that every
column, every
row and every
3x2 box contains
the digits 1 to 6
Cluelines Stuck on Codeword? To receive 4 random clues call 0901 322 5000 or text
TIMECODE to 88010. Calls cost 75p plus your telephone company?s network access
charge. Texts cost �plus your standard network charge. For the full solution call
0907 181 1055. Calls cost 80p per minute plus your telephone company?s network access
charge. SP: Spoke, 0333 202 3390 (Mon-Fri, 9am-5.30pm).
6Winners will
receive a Collins
English Dictionary
& Thesaurus
Lexica
No 3915
K
N
O
Q
Need help with today?s puzzle? Call 0906 757 7188 to check the
answers. Calls cost 80p per minute plus your telephone company?s
network access charge.
SP: Spoke, 0333 202 3390 (Mon-Fri 9am-5.30pm).
Solve the puzzle
and text in the
numbers in the
three shaded
boxes. Text
TIMES followed
by a space, then your three
numbers, eg, TIMES 123, plus your
name, address and postcode to
88010 (UK only), by midnight.
Or enter by phone. Call 09012
925274 (ROI 1516 415 029)
by midnight. Leave your three
answer numbers (in any order)
and your contact details.
No 3916
A
W
K
I
P
L
N
A
I
U
T
Y
B
R
M
I
N
D
N
U
I
M
R
A
E
O
T
F
R
U
E
G
C
U
R
T
H
Calls cost �00 (ROI ?1.50) plus your telephone company?s
network access charge. Texts cost �plus your standard network charge.
Winners will be picked at random from all correct answers received.
One draw per week. Lines close at midnight tonight.
If you call or text after this time you will not be entered but will still be
charged. SP: Spoke, 0333 202 3390 (Mon-Fri, 9am-5.30pm).
M
Slide the letters either horizontally or vertically back into the grid to produce a
completed crossword. Letters are allowed to slide over other letters
KenKen Medium No 4119
Futoshiki No 2998
� 2010 KENKEN PUZZLE & TM NEXTOY. DIST. BY UFS, INC. WWW.KENKEN.COM
>
?
?
?
Challenge compiled by Allan Simmons
SCRABBLE� is a registered trademark of J. W. Spear & Sons Ltd ㎝attel 2017
Win a Dictionary & Thesaurus
Numbers are substituted for letters in the crossword grid. Below the grid is the
key. Some letters are solved. When you have completed your first word or
phrase you will have the clues to more letters. Enter them in the key grid and
the main grid and check the letters on the alphabet list as you complete them.
Yesterday?s solution, right
1 Brown pigment (5)
2 Threatening (7)
3 Instruction for regular
payments (8,5)
4 Disease-carrying fly (6)
5 Caribbean group (6,7)
6 First Greek letter (5)
7 Old word for food (7)
12 Italian painter (7)
14 Idealistic reformer (7)
15 Getaway (6)
17 Relating to the eye (5)
19 Consecrate (5)
All the digits 1 to 6 must appear in every row and column. In
each thick-line ?block?, the target number in the top lefthand corner is calculated from the digits in all the cells in the
block, using the operation indicated by the symbol.
D
Use only the board area shown. Collins Official
Scrabble Words is the authority used, although the
solutions are not unusual words. Standard Scrabble
rules apply for making the word plays.
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
� PUZZLER MEDIA
1
4
8
9
C
Key
2L = double letter
3L = triple letter
2W = double word
3W = triple word
Letter values
AEIOULNRST=1
DG=2 BCMP=3
FHVWY=4 K=5
JX=8 QZ=10
What?s the highest score using
the J with this rack?
20
G
9
COMP A S
E A V
AOR T A
S
R
ERAD I C
L
C
DU L CE T
E O
F I T
SH
I
M H
A V ERAG
N N W
TOT A L
25
21
Across
B
I
2L
FGJLOPU
I
22
2L
A
19
20
20
o
2L
pur 2L
2W
g
fourth 3L
i 2L
t
2L
3W
d
2L
2L
12
2W
Kakuro No 1957
<
10
24
11
19
20
23
16
>
4
24
7
16
16
17
25
7
23
16
4
10
5
4
3
3
3
4
3
<
18
17
4
6
6
10
4
>
23
16
5
18
17
11
20
23
4
4
Fill the blank squares so that each row and column contains
all the numbers 1, 2, 3, 4 and 5. Use the given numbers and
the symbols that tell you if a number in the square is larger
(>) or smaller (<) than the number next to it.
24
18
19
Fill the grid so that
each block adds up
to the total of the
block above or to
the left. You can
only use digits 1-9
and you must not
use the digit twice
in one block. The
same digit may
occur more than
once in a row or
column, but must
be in a separate
block.
16
3
10
� PUZZLER MEDIA
8
14 15
the times | Wednesday September 13 2017
15
1GT
MindGames
White: Frantisek Zita
Black: David Bronstein
Moscow 1946
King?s Indian Defence
________
� DbDrDkD]
郉pD Dpgp]
� 1p0 DpD]
轉 h D D ]
� DPHPD D]
蹹PH D )P]
� D ! hBD]
�$ D $ I ]
谅媚牌侨
1 c4 e5 2 Nc3 Nf6 3 Nf3 d6 4 d4
Nbd7 5 g3 g6 6 Bg2 Bg7 7 0-0 0-0
8 b3
Nowadays, the main line is 8
e4 c6 9 h3. White?s plan appears
logical enough but, as we shall
see, the long diagonal is not necessarily the best place for the
white queen?s bishop.
8 ... Re8 9 Bb2 c6 10 e4 exd4 11
Nxd4 Qb6 12 Qd2 Nc5 13 Rfe1 a5
This is standard in the King?s
Indian and is normally used to
safeguard the c5-square for the
knight. Here, however, Black has
more aggressive thoughts in mind,
intending queenside play with ...
a5-a4.
14 Rab1 a4 15 Ba1 axb3 16 axb3
Ng4
This move is the prelude to a
brilliant combinative breakout.
The normal set-up nowadays for
White in this line is to include the
move h2-h3. It is precisely to
19 Re3
19 Kxf2 Nxb3 and 19 Qxf2 Nd3
are both disastrous for White.
19 ... Nxh3+ 20 Kh2 Nf2
The impudent knight puts itself
en prise again. Now it is heading
for g4, with devastating effect.
21 Rf3 Ncxe4 22 Qf4 Ng4+ 23
Kh1 f5
The deadly pin along the long
black diagonal wins further material.
24 Nxe4 Rxe4 25 Qxd6 Rxd4 26
Qb8 Rd8
Black has two pieces and two
extra pawns for the rook and his
minor pieces all exhibit deadly
activity.
27 Ra8 Be5 28 Qa7 Qb4 29 Qa2
Qf8
A nice geometrical touch. The
queen switches to h6, as White
continues to be torn apart on the
dark squares.
30 Bh3 Qh6 White resigns
________
� D 4rDkD] Winning Move
郉 D Dpgp]
� D DpD D] White to play. This position is from
Tbilisi 2017.
轉 1N) H ] Inarkiev-Mchedlishvili,
In this position, one?s eye is naturally
� D DQD D] drawn towards 1 Qxh7+ and, indeed, this
蹹PD D ) ] is not bad. However, White played a
跴DPD D )] stronger move. Can you see it?
贒KDRD D ] For up-to-the-minute information, follow
谅媚牌侨 my tweets on twitter.com/times_chess.
EASY
31
x3
MEDIUM
82
+ 95 x 5 ? 87
104
x 9 + 772
HARDER
23 - The king-jack guess
Consider the difference between
Dummy
?KJ
(A)
Declarer
?32
and
Dummy or
Dummy
?K2
?AQ
(B)
(C)
Declarer
Declarer
?43
?32
In (B) and (C), you don?t have
any choice, any decision to make
(other than whether, and when, to
take the finesse). In (B), either ?A
is onside or it?s not; in (C), either
?K is onside or it?s not.
In (A), you have a decision, a
choice of plays. Either you can
lead to ?K, hoping West holds
?A; or you can lead to ?J, hoping
West holds ?Q.
You won?t get all your king-jack
guesses right, not even the best
player in the world does, but the
skilful declarer will seek to improve
his odds from 50-50 to perhaps 70
per cent accuracy. He?ll use all the
sleuthing techniques we?ve been
focusing on ? and more ? to
learn about the other suits; to piece
together the evidence. If possible,
discovery work and procrastination are the order of the day.
Examples of such reasoning:
?West would have opened 1NT
if he had ?A?.
?East would?ve responded to his
partner?s opening bid if he had ?A?.
?West led from ?Q; if he had
?Q, he may have led a diamond?.
�
75%
OF IT
+9
50%
OF IT
3/4
x2
?6
? 98 x 3 ? 43
80%
OF IT
OF IT
+ 824 + 1/5 + 984 x 2 + 886
OF IT
1?
4?
Pass
End
1?
2?
andrew.robson@thetimes.co.uk
OF IT
? 89
1/2
OF IT
2
Killer Tricky No 5623
9
16
14
25min
14
14
10
10
21
21
20
18
17
21
8
21
5
19
16
27
7
13
9
12
12
Killer Deadly No 5624
22
14
21
17min
29
11
6
7
19
3
11
6 2 1
8 1 3
9 7 5
8 2
2 4
1 3
2
6 8 9
8 9
9 7
7
3
8
4
1
9
6
2
7
5
9
8
3
1
2
7
4
5
6
5
4
2
3
6
9
7
1
8
8
9
7
5
4
2
3
6
1
=
216
=
9
Please note, BODMAS does not apply
6
7
2
8
5
3
9
4
1
5
1
9
4
2
7
8
6
3
7
6
8
9
3
4
5
1
2
9 7
8 9
6 8
5
3
7
1
4
2
2
1
6
9
8
1
6
5
7
9
3
2
8
4
2
5
8
4
3
6
1
9
7
4
7
1
9
8
5
6
3
2
6
3
9
2
7
1
8
4
5
4
5
3
2
6
1
7
9
8
9
2
1
5
7
8
4
3
6
1
4
6
7
8
2
3
5
9
8
3
5
6
4
9
1
2
7
2
9
7
3
1
5
6
8
4
4
3
6
1
5
7
9
2
8
6
3
15
4
8
7
1
2
4
9
6
3
5
9
2
5
6
3
8
7
4
1
3
8
4
9
7
6
1
5
2
1
7
3
9
4
8
6
5
2
2
2
2
4
8
5
9
6
1
2
4
3
7
6
2
4
5
7
3
8
1
9
3
6
5
8
2
4
9
7
1
5
1
9
4
2
3
8
6
7
1
9
8
5
6
2
4
7
3
7
4
2
3
9
1
5
8
6
6
5
3
7
8
4
2
1
9
2
1
8
3
9
7
5
6
4
9
4
7
1
5
6
3
2
8
7
8
2
4
6
5
1
9
3
4
9
6
2
3
1
7
8
5
5
3
1
7
8
9
2
4
6
6
5
2
3
2
1
5
4
1 < 3
5
x
x
10
2
3
6
7
8
-
�
-
+
2
5
4
?
5
1
x
x
+
-
G
R
A
S
S
H
O
P
P
E
R
Suko 2028
1
3
6
9
2
8
7
5
4
5
8
2
7
4
6
1
3
9
4
9
7
1
3
5
6
8
2
8
1
5
4
6
3
2
9
7
6
7
3
2
5
9
8
4
1
9
2
4
8
7
1
5
6
3
7
4
8
5
9
2
3
1
6
2
6
1
3
8
4
9
7
5
3
5
9
6
1
7
4
2
8
Z
A
P
J
X
H
E
O
I
S
S
T
L
H
O
R
I
N
G
I
E
D
Lexica 3914
4 > 1
2 < 3
?
2
1 < 3
4
Set Square 1959
4
Scrabble 1956
BUNGALOW A8
down (42)
HOSPITAL A15
down (117)
Lexica 3913
Futoshiki 2997
2
O L L Y
D
A
D
T O
E
A X I
U T
L U S
E A
S UM
P
F
P I
L
E
U I RK
Sudoku 9310
2
6
7
8
1
5
3
9
4
Killer 5622
3
?
4
?
5
4
I
N
C
L
U
S
I
V
E
L
Y
ADA P T
J
I
A
A
U T
RU L E
T
T
OOM SOB
A L L
R
AR I
O U
Z I P
T
I C E
E Y E
R
E
A Y WH A R
P
O R
S T OOD Q
Sudoku 9309
3
2
4
6
1
8
5
7
9
KenKen 4118
21
As with standard Sudoku, fill the grid so that every
column, every row and every 3x3 box contains the
digits 1 to 9. Each set of cells joined by dotted lines
must add up to the target number in its top-left corner.
Within each set of cells joined by dotted lines, a digit
cannot be repeated.
1
used in this
grid, but only
once. Can you
work out their
= 4 positions in the
grid so that
each of the six
different sums
works? We?ve
= 13 put 2 numbers
in to help you.
Do the sums
left to right and
top to bottom
Codeword 3126
18
22
x
+
=
7
4
9 7
9 7 6 2
9 8
7
7 4 9
8 9 3 1
5 7 1 2
1 3
9
8 9
3
1 5 7 8 6
3 4
3 1
Cell Blocks 3009
11
+
x
Kakuro 1956
22
25
+
x
1
17
All the digits
= 52 from 1-9 are
x
-
20
31
19
4
-
-
Killer 5621
20
4
Divide the grid
into blocks.
Each block
must be square
or rectangular
and must
contain the
number of
cells indicated
by the number
inside it.
Solutions
7
1
6
8
5
4
9
2
3
7
x
+
Sudoku 9308
14
6
6
4
2 3
6
Yesterday?s answers
aga, agal, agar, alar, alga, dag, dagga,
dal, drag, gad, gag, gaga, gal, gala, gar,
glad, grad, lad, lag, laggard, lard, rad,
rag, raga, ragga
21
4
2
12
From these letters, make words of
four or more letters, always including
the central letter. Answers must be
in the Concise Oxford Dictionary,
excluding capitalised words, plurals,
conjugated verbs (past tense etc),
adverbs ending in LY, comparatives
and superlatives.
How you rate 12 words, average;
16, good; 24, very good; 32, excellent
Pass
Pass
West leads ?Q v your 4?, East
winning ?A (felling your ?K) and
switching to ?8. West wins ?A and
switches to ?7. Crunch time. It
appears you?ve little to go on, as the
opponents never bid. However, as
so often, it is their failure to bid that
is at least as telling their bidding.
You are missing ten hearts, yet
neither opponent saw fit to mention
the suit. You?d guess a player with
six hearts would have ventured
forth, so you presume the hearts to
be 5-5. East, holding ?Axxxx, could
not scratch up a 1? overcall. Would
he not do so with an outside ace?
You?re inclined to place West with
?A. You rise with ?K.
?K wins and you can now draw
trumps, cash ?KJ, cross to a trump
and discard all your diamonds on
dummy?s clubs. Eleven tricks made.
Note playing West for ?A
would be less clear at Matchpoint
Pairs, where West would be more
reluctant to lead from ?A and
potentially give away the costly
overtrick. You may try ?J at Pairs.
1/2
Set Square No 1960
23
Dealer: North, Vulnerability: Both
?Q J 6 3
?9 8
?K J
?AQ 6 3 2 ? 8
?A 4
N
?Q J 6 5 2
?A 10 7 4 3
W E
?A 8 7
?Q 6 4 3
S
?9 8 4
?10 7 5
? K 10 9 7 5 2
Contract: 4?
?K
?10 9 5 2
Lead: ? Q
?K J
S
W
N
E
+8
Polygon
Bridge Andrew Robson
Counting and Card Placement
?7
� PUZZLER MEDIA
The recent appearance of two
books on that chessboard genius
David Bronstein are an acute
reminder of what a creative and
innovative force he was with the
black pieces. Today?s game is an
imperishable masterpiece that
heralded the advent of his favourite King?s Indian Defence as a
viable defensive system at the
highest levels. Notes are based on
those by Steve Giddins in Bronstein: Move by Move (Everyman
Chess).
prevent moves such as Black?s last
that h3 is usually played.
17 h3
This natural response loses by
force. The only way to hold the
white position together was 17
Red1, reinforcing the defence of
the knight on d4.
17 ... Rxa1! 18 Rxa1 Nxf2!
ANSWER ANSWER ANSWER
Black magic
Cell Blocks No 3010
Brain Trainer
� PUZZLER MEDIA
Chess Raymond Keene
9
-
+
4
Quiz 1 Margaret Thatcher 2 La Traviata 3 Dolly
Parton 4 White beans (haricots blancs or lingots)
5 Rigveda 6 Firth of Forth 7 India 8 The
Borrowers by Mary Norton 9 Good Will Hunting
10 Viscount Althorp, the late John Spencer, 8th
Earl Spencer ? father of Diana, Princess of Wales
11 Virginia Slims 12 Gloria Grahame 13 Bismuth
14 Campeonato Brasileiro (Serie A) ? the top
Brazilian league 15 William ?Count? Basie
F
A
I
L
L
I
I
D
P
I
V
I
X
L
L
O
T
I
E
E
P
A
L
I
Word watch
Drepaniform (a) Sickleshaped (biological)
Jaculiferous (c) Bearing
spines or prickles
Caliginous (b) Dark,
dim, obscure
Brain Trainer
Easy 44; Medium 599;
Harder 3,953
Chess 1 Nf6+! Kf8 (1 ...
Bxf6 2 Qxh7+ mates)
2 Ngxh7+ Ke7 3 Qb7+
forcing mate
13.09.17
MindGames
Difficult No 9311
Fill the grid so that
every column, every
row and every 3x3
box contains the
digits 1 to 9.
Fiendish No 9312
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Word watch
by Josephine
Balmer
Drepaniform
a Sickle-shaped
b An industrial
moulding
c Greasy
5
9
8
Caliginous
a Ossified
b Dark
c Gristly
Answers on page 15
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by Olav Bjortomt The Times Quiz Book
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12 Peter Turner?s
memoir Film Stars
Don?t Die in Liverpool
recounts his
relationship with which
ageing Hollywood star?
1 Who is the only British
prime minister in the
20th century to win
three consecutive terms?
2 Violetta Val閞y, Flora
Bervoix and Barone
Douphol are roles in
which Verdi opera?
15
3 Who released her
debut album, Hello, I?m
Dolly, in 1967?
carries the M90 across
which estuary?
MIT janitor with a gift
for mathematics?
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made with which type
of bean?
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forces unit of which
Asian country?s navy?
5 Which sacred book
of Hinduism has a
Sanskrit title meaning
?Knowledge of Verses??
8 The Clock family ?
Pod, Homily and
Arrietty ? feature in
which 1952 novel?
10 Who served as
equerry to George VI
from 1950 to 1952, and
to the Queen from
1952 to 1954?
6 The newly opened
Queensferry Crossing
9 In which film does
Matt Damon play an
11 Which cigarette
brand introduced
the famous slogan
?You?ve come a long
way, baby??
13 In 1753, the chemist
Claude Fran鏾is
Geoffroy proved which
metallic element to be
distinct from lead?
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sports magazine
Placar has awarded
the Bola de Ouro to
the best footballer in
which league?
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bandleader is pictured?
Answers on page 15
The Times Quick Cryptic No 917
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The Full Works Concert. Alexander Armstrong
showcases some of Durham?s acclaimed
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Francisco Tarrega. Garth (Cello Concerto No 6
in G); Lord (Durham Concerto); Tarrega
(Recuerdos de la Alhambra); Patrick Hawes
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and Will Todd (Stay with me, Lord) 10.00
Smooth Classics 1.00am Sam Pittis
the times | Wednesday September 13 2017
11
1GT
DONALD COOPER; HELEN MAYBANKS
Concert
Emily Askew Band
Slaughtered Lamb, EC1
Theatre
The Knowledge
Charing Cross Theatre, WC2
P
T
{{{{(
erhaps some things never
change. Miri It Is, one of
the songs in Emily Askew?s
opening set, written in
Middle English, dates from
the 13th century yet deals with a topic
that modern audiences will have no
difficulty understanding: the vagaries
of the weather. It didn?t take a great
leap of the imagination to picture
ourselves huddled over a fire in some
hostelry in ye olde London.
The quartet?s programme carried us
much farther afield, from France to
Germany, Spain and Portugal,
blending wistful introspection with,
occasionally, the raw energy of
a ceilidh. Askew, as some readers may
remember, was part of the Elizabethan
Session, a glorious meeting of past
and present that yielded one of the
outstanding concerts and recordings
of 2014. Anyone who was present at
the Hatfield House premiere will
cherish the memory of the petite
musician corralling her arsenal of
period instruments.
What makes her new project so
intriguing is the instinctive approach it
takes to bridging the gap between folk
and early music. Her group, which
includes another versatile soloist in
John Dipper, deserves to catch the ear
of non-folkies who have always made
a point of keeping a couple of David
Munrow albums in their collection.
One of the exuberant themes Askew
performed at Hatfield resurfaces on
her new band?s album, Alchemy, part
of a crowd-funded venture that also
includes ? for those who want to try
their hand at playing ? a tune book.
The live versions of the pieces were
every bit as exuberant, Dipper?s viola
d?amore providing a brisk
counterpoint to Askew?s pipes, vielle
and surprisingly forceful recorder.
Jamie Roberts?s acoustic guitar
generated subtle propulsion alongside
a percussive armoury ? including
a cajon and a set of medieval bells ?
calmly overseen by Simon Whittaker.
Askew?s sister, Hazel, made a brief
but potent guest appearance on harp
in the second set. There was an
a cappella excursion too, and at the
close the rhythms of Allez � la foug鑢e
cheerily sent us on our way into
the night.
Clive Davis
Theatre
The March on Russia
Orange Tree, Richmond
M
{{{{(
r and Mrs Pasmore are
celebrating their 60th
wedding anniversary,
or, rather, their three
middle-aged children are
determined to celebrate for them.
David Storey?s 1989 play The March
on Russia showed us the last survivors
of an old mining community retired
in a cosy, lonely bungalow as
Thatcherism marched on around
them. Alice Hamilton?s well-judged
revival keeps the political history alive,
but refocuses Storey?s play as a gentle
elegy to modern old age. The 21st
century is creating a generation of
artsfirst night
{{(((
Michael Fabiano as Rodolfo and Nicole Car as Mim� in Richard Jones?s Royal Opera production
No bohemian rhapsody
This routine
new Puccini
staging is saved
by outstanding
musical values,
says Richard
Morrison
Opera
La boh鑝e
Covent Garden
{{{((
Five stars for
Scythians at the
British Museum
First Night, main paper
E
very opera house needs
a heart-wringing, durable
production of La boh鑝e, if
only for commercial purposes.
Nothing entertains affluent
old people more than the spectacle of
starving young people dying to Puccini.
For 41 years the Royal Opera had
such a production. Unfortunately the
show that opens its new season isn?t it.
Two years ago John Copley?s muchloved staging was finally sent the way
of poor Mim� in the opera. In its place
comes a production by Richard Jones
that is neither brazenly radical nor
meticulously rooted in period, neither
breathtakingly picturesque nor
shockingly stripped down. In fact, the
first adjective that springs to mind is
routine and the second is dull.
True, Jones?s set designer, Stewart
Laing, has one purple patch of
inspiration, turning Act II into a
sliding parade of glittering Parisian
exteriors. Even that, however, causes
irritation. If he can lavish so much
detail on the Latin Quarter, why just
a minimalist roof, as atmospheric as
an Ikea bookcase, for the bohemians?
attic? And if those Act II sets can be
whisked across the stage with hightech efficiency, why does it take ages
to push that roof back into position for
Act IV, imposing a hiatus when the
tragedy should be gaining intensity?
people who reach retirement age while
still caring for their parents. So the
time feels right to revive this
bittersweet vignette about a couple
whose greatest tragedy ? despite
two world wars, multiple pit
accidents and brushes with the
workhouse ? is living long
enough to witness their children?s
disappointments.
At the heart of Hamilton?s
staging is a terrific performance by
Ian Gelder. Gelder plays Tom,
Yorkshire grit through and through.
Except that he?s not Tom, but always
Mr Pasmore, in tribute to a time when
the working classes had pride and
politesse. Pride and dignity are the
warp and weft of this story. Storey had
an ear for the rhythms of domestic
bickering; Hamilton matches it with
a knack for articulating emotion in the
rituals of domestic life. Who makes
Sue Wallace as
Mrs Pasmore in David
Storey?s 1989 drama
Even Jones?s handling of the main
characters gets off to a shaky start,
with Nicole Car?s Mim� collapsing in
a faint as soon as she meets Michael
Fabiano?s Rodolfo ? perhaps knocked
out by his Colgate smile ? then just as
suddenly springing up again. It must
be said, however, that after this dodgy
meeting the central figures are much
more believably depicted.
And ? redeeming features at last!
? the show is very well cast,
passionately accompanied by the
Royal Opera orchestra under Antonio
Pappano?s peerless direction and
vibrantly sung. The star turn is
undoubtedly Car, who touchingly
conveys the joy, naivety, then growing
panic of the doomed heroine, with
a surge of lustrous timbre ready for the
big moments. Fabiano doesn?t have
a comparable vocal ease, but his
hipsterish poet is subtly subverted;
more concerned with cultivating his
grief, it seems, than with comforting
his dying girlfriend.
Simona Mihai?s petulant, high-onsomething Musetta is a galvanising
stage presence (it will be fascinating to
see how she converts into Mim� later
in this run) and Mariusz Kwiecien is
an ideal foil as a volatile Marcello. It?s
an OK night in far-from-gay Paree,
but this staging won?t run for 41 years.
Box office: 020 7304 4000, to Oct 10
the toast ? and how ? has never
seemed so loaded with tension.
Sophia Simensky?s costumes
artfully delineate just how far each
of the siblings has come from their
roots. Colin Tierney?s smooth,
unsettled Colin has spent enough
time in universities to mask his
accent; divorced local councillor
Wendy, superb Sarah Belcher, still
has Macclesfield vowels, but sharp
tailoring. Only Connie Walker?s
graceless Eileen, all over-eager smiles
and seething resentment, is swathed in
hand-me-down lumpy sweaters, being
the wife of an unsuccessful teacher.
The title refers to one of Tom?s war
stories, touched on only lightly. But
everything is touched on lightly in this
gentle handling, a rare example of
subtlety in kitchen-sink family drama.
Kate Maltby
Box office: 020 8940 3633, to Oct 7
elevision plays don?t
come much better than
The Knowledge. Jack
Rosenthal?s 1979 paean to
the humble London cabbie
? it feels more like an elegy in the
age of Uber ? followed four plucky
souls as they grappled with learning
the knowledge (memorising the
London A-Z, essentially). It featured
a cracking ensemble cast, with a truly
memorable performance from Nigel
Hawthorne as the unnerving
examiner, Mr Burgess.
Stage plays, thankfully, come rather
better than The Knowledge, Simon
Block?s faithful, affectionate and
all-too-reverent adaptation of
Rosenthal?s work ? directed, for the
first time on stage, by Rosenthal?s
widow, Maureen Lipman. Despite the
clear love for the work and the relish
with which the cast get their mouths
around Rosenthal?s finely crafted lines,
this nice but dull recession-era
comedy neither convinces of its
modern-day relevance nor evokes
a sense of time or place.
That is despite the designer Nicolai
Hart-Hansen?s insistent set, with its
EastEnders-title-sequence flooring and
London street names dangling from
the ceiling. There are scattered
references throughout to the dole,
unemployment and Pat Jennings, but
the grime and the hopelessness are
absent. It looks rather as though they
are playing out a 1970s sitcom in
a quirky branch of Habitat.
The performances, however, are
generally on the money. Fabien
Frankel as the gormless Chris, James
Alexandrou as the cowboy odd-job
man Gordon, and Ben Caplan as the
The comedy fails
to evoke a sense
of time or place
bookish Ted are solid. However, they
are often outshone by their female
counterparts ? Block, wisely, has
beefed up the wives? and girlfriends?
roles ? particularly the excellent
Alice Felgate. However, the stodgy
feminist speech he lumps in the
mouth of the female cabbie, Miss
Staveley, is a clanger.
The main disappointment is Steven
Pacey as Burgess, although, in fairness,
Hawthorne left an all but impossible
act to follow. Pacey is a fine actor,
but he lends the supposedly feared
examiner the air of an eccentric
show-off, all funny voices, officious
twitches and cocked eyebrows.
Burgess is known as the Vampire;
here he is the Clown. You would more
likely leave his office bored to tears
by his antics than awed. The script
renders him rather sentimental too.
It doesn?t fit.
For an exercise in nostalgia, and
as a reminder of the wonderful
Rosenthal, The Knowledge does
nicely. However, if you?re after some
authentic theatre that shows you the
earthier side of London life, save the
cab fare and take the night bus.
Chris Bennion
Box office: 08444 930650, to Nov 11
12
1GT
Wednesday September 13 2017 | the times
television & radio
Viewing Guide
Joe Clay
Mountain: Life
at the Extreme
BBC Two, 9pm
The Andes
is the longest
continental
mountain
range in the world ?
three times the length
of the Himalayas ?
stretching through
three four-month-old
cubs must make a kill
every four days ? a
sudden mist provides
the ideal cover for an
ambush. In the Bolivian
Andes there is the Salar
de Uyuni, 4,000 square
miles of nothing except
10 billion tonnes of salt
crystals. The aerial
shots are jaw-dropping.
The central Andes
was once home to the
Inca empire and the
drone-cam lingers over
the granite buildings
at Machu Picchu. In
the Peruvian highlands
the descendants of the
Incas come together
to weave rope from
the hardy mountain
grasses. We also
encounter a spectacled
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