calamity james dennis & gnasher MINNIE the minx dd £2.75 26-May-18 Cover gifts may vary. Competitions open to UK residents only, unless otherwise stated. ddddddddddddd AUS $4.95, NZ $5.99 astalrsriong UK Off-sale date — 30/05/2018 STAR WARS PRIZES! USE THE DODGES, YOU MUST! i’VE GOT A BAD FEELiNG ABOUT THiS! LIAM FROM DUBLIN IS ... #SOBeano hello! my name is liam and this week, i’m #sobeano! it’s the day of the big beanotown gymnastics competition… people in beanotown know me as lightning liam! time for my performance – i’ve got something flashy planned! i’m a gymnastics champion and i can shoot lightning bolts from my fingers! that’s got to be perfect marks. next up, liam! time to hear the judges’ verdicts… i think my performance really shocked them! G! N A B CR AS H! nice work, liam! ? o n a e WANT TO BE #SOB Next week, it could be YOU! If you’re chosen to be #SOBeano, you’ll get to pick the best jokes and pranks, award someone the Golden #SOBeano, read the comic strips before anyone else, and loads more! ALL YOU NEED TO DO IS FIND BIG EGGO’S EGG! Email us at: Make sure you tell us: 1 The story Big Eggo’s egg is in! 2 firstname.lastname@example.org Your all-time favourite joke! 3 Your name, date of birth, your parent or guardian’s name and phone number! Don’t forget to include a photo too! For blamtastic quizzes, comics and puzzles, go to beano.com/beanotown The winner will be chosen at random by the Beano team. You must obtain permission from your parent or guardian before entering. For our full competition T&Cs, visit https://www.dctmedia.co.uk/brands/beano/ or send a stamped addressed envelope to Beano Marketing, Copy of your Competition Terms, D.C. Thomson, 2 Albert Square, Dundee DD1 9QJ. Did you know that in space, astronauts can have scrambled eggs for breakfast? It has to be frozen first though – yuck! Last week’s egg was in JJ! The egg is hidden somewhere in the pages of your Beano. Can you crack the case and spot it? that’s because you’ve a lot to learn to become a gaming master like me! what game are you playing, minnie? pac-man, space invaders, centipede, galaxian? i’m playing splattyshoot 3! i’ve never heard of those other things! bring it on, old man! soon… wait… which one am i? WORDS: ANDY FANTON ART: PAUL PALMER why is that flashing? who’s splatting me? i think my controller is broken! got you! i win! bah! video games are stupid anyway! let’s have a game of football! i’ll definitely win that! sigh! fine, dad! so… i was great at football when i was a lad! i could have been a footballer, if i’d trained all my life! darren makepeace, super striker for beanotown united, shoots and… …hey! that’s not fair! uh-huh. just give me a minute to get my gloves on. tee-hee! you’ve got to give me a big hand for that one! and so… i’m great at tennis! they used to call me ‘tennis later… puff! pant! 40-all! that’s deuce! the menace’! did someone say ‘juice’? chortle! don’t go on about it - you’re making a racquet! chortle! wah! my shot! i lose! later still… of course, golf is a real game of skill! eek! my ball’s gone through that window! you two are banned from this club! forever! yikes! we’re fore it now! this game’s going to go off with a bang! at least you got a hole in one! chuckle! they try basketball… then bowls… horseshoes… i was a shoe in to win! i’ve slam dunk! hee-hee! bowled you over again, dad! noo! how?! erk! tiddlywinks… chess… running… i’ve really crossed the line now! you got pawned! ha-ha! grr! that win wasn’t tiddly at all! anything! oof! aw, minnie! how sweet! finally… i felt bad that you didn’t win anything. you’ll always be the best at being my dad… …but you’ll never be the best at minxing! ho-ho! wah! i lost everything we did! i can’t win urrgh! why is there slime all over the handles? When’s the best time to use a trampoline? Spring time! it’s blam-tastic! jj Freewheeling freestyle fun! WORDS: HUGH RAINE ART: WAYNE THOMPSON hey! good luck with the marathon today, jj! thanks! don’t forget to keep hydrated on your marathon, jj! we’ll all be cheering you on, jj! a marathon viewing of the game of prawns box set isn’t that difficult! i’m not sure what all the fuss is about. betty & the yeti this is very important, yeti. listen to the following instruction – do not eat the new sofa. okay? WORDS & ART: HUGH RAINE right! The ordinary girl with the extraordinary best friend! yeti nibble sofa? no! don’t eat, nibble, chew, taste, devour or even lick the new sofa! later… put that salt away! this is dad’s new pride and joy and you’re not to ingest, feed, bite, gnaw, scoff, or swallow it! got it? yeti! what are you doing?! got it. yeti munching sofa. betty not say anything about munching. erm… okay. blah! blah! blah! dragons! blah! blah! blah! swords! looks like the mayor’s having a posh dinner party and invited bananaman… like this guy, right here! who are you? i’m afraid not. i’m here as security to check no villains try to get inside to steal stuff. a likely story! i’d recognise you anywhere, general blight. disguise or no disguise! urrgh! i’m the mayor’s butler! soon... WORDS: TOMMY DONBAVAND ART: WAYNE THOMPSON ! CLICK ! WHIZZ but... good evening, madam. you’re under arrest! huh?! lock ‘em up and throw away the key, chiefy! the mayor will be so pleased when he finds out what i’ve done. hey! i’ve been handcuffed! ZOOM! as is the rest of your crafty criminal colleagues, doctor gloom, auntie and the heavy mob! you blithering banana-brained buffoon! you’ve arrested all my staff and now i have no-one to cook, serve or play music for my guests! so you can do the lot! er… yes, sir, mr mayor! you can rely on me! so… how hard can it be to cook a meal for nine people? an hour later… before long… here we are… bone appetit! actually, it’s a little harder than it first appears. er... oh my! heads up! here comes the bread! more fizzy pop, madam? stop fooling around and play some music! S! S O T ooh! Z! FIZ ! WL A U SQ SCREE CH! just like mozart von beethoven played it! rant! important guests… shout! in the kitchen – now! inedible food… yell! terrible smell… now, get back in there and apologise! arrgh! H! PIS E E SH my ears! but… i’m sorry that i… scarper! well, that’s another case solved by my brilliance! …er, i think your guests were in disguise, mr mayor. i’ve been robbed! What do you call a bear with no socks? Barefoot! you blue buffoon! all my valuables… gone! my house… trashed! gah! R! TEA RIP ! YOU’RE This week it’s a Beano costume special! Check out these amazing menace makeovers and send in photos of your own – we’ve got prizes up for grabs! Reggie from Plymouth is a particularly menacing Gnasher! He’s the winner of my Golden #SOBeano! Gno-one will recognise me! Share your moments! I’ve earned my Beano stripes! o NOBean # ur yo Tell us epic fail, we’ll turn it into a cartoon and you’ll win a prize for owning up! Here’s Robert from Dublin! I was at a trampoline park and decided to try a front flip but I ended up bouncing off the wall! #NOBeano! ol is Clementine from Brist ht up a super-cool Dennis, rig to that hair! I’ve even got the red hair! Is that a mirror? Oh, it’s Isaac from Nottingham! Wow! This disguise is tater-ly cool! Saskia from Surrey is ready for some top minxing! No Walters get past us! Amelie and Eddie from Milton are a pair of troublemakers! Are you #SOBeano? My catapult is ready! Send your photos, jokes, drawings and letters along with your name, date of birth, parent or guardian’s name, address and contact details to: #SOBeano, Beano, DC Thomson, 2 Albert Square, Dundee DD1 9QJ SOBeano@beano.com NOBeano@beano.com Jasmine from Skipton is a minx from head to toe! Join Dennis on his biggest adventure yet in Dennis and the Chamber of Mischief, a brand new book full of epic quests and hilarious mishaps! Every menace on this page has won their very own copy! www.beano.com Please note we can’t return pictures or photographs, so send a copy if the original is important to you. For our full competition T&Cs visit www.dctmedia.co.uk/brands/beano or send a stamped addressed envelope to Beano Marketing, Copy of your Competition Terms, D.C. Thomson, 2 Albert Square, Dundee DD1 9QJ. Prizes may vary from those shown and please allow 28 days for delivery. beano.com/shop my new mobile can answer any question! sili! what’s the tallest building in the world? later… that would be the burj khalifa in dubai. i’m sure mumsie won’t mind me borrowing her new mobile! let’s try it out! sili, where’s the nearest place to buy a tin of fizzy milk? follow my directions. wow! many miles and many directions later… finally… this isn’t the nearest shop! it’s the dearest shop! sili, what’s on AT the cinema today? 100 zombies. shall i buy tickets? 100… 100… …tickets?! i’ve bought 100 tickets as requested. they’ll be added to your phone bill. i’d better get this back home before anything else bad happens! okay, james, i’ve ordered another 100 tickets. whimper! WORDS & ART: LESLIE STANNAGE later, at home… sigh! sili, who’s the unluckiest boy in the world? that’s the only thing you’ve got right. mumsie grounded me for borrowing her phone without asking… …then she went to watch 100 zombies 200 times! groan! that would be calamity james! What do bad chickens lay? Devilled eggs! i just gneed to borrow a couple of springs… kangaroos carry their young in pouches! …and mum’s handbag, and i’m a gnasheroo! gnee-hee! that looks like fun. dad won’t be happy when he sees this! – ed hey! my sandwich! gnasheroos can reach food that dogs can’t! and they can get over the cats’ home wall! eek! hop it, you two! later… …and they bring back sausages! us australian gnasheroos throw bone-erangs... WORDS: JD SAVAGE ART: BARRIE APPLEBY yummy! they’ll gnever catch us on these springs, son! gnoops! there’s a lot of angry people after us! What did the bus driver sway to the kangaroo? ‘Hop on’! gnee-hee! they’re hopping mad! A storm trooper! Collect all your favourite Star Wars legends with the new Star Wars Mighty Muggs collection! Press the button on your Mighty Mugg to send their head into a spin and reveal all three secret facial expressions! 10 readers will win three Star Wars Mighty Muggs each! a slime blaster! Forget soaking your friends with water – blast them with slime instead! This pump-action blaster is double the trouble because you can use it as a water AVAILABLE AT THE pistol too! We have 10 Zimpli ENTERTAINER STORES! Kids Slime Blasters up for grabs and every winner will www.THETOYSHOP.com get a free refill pack too! Solo: A Star Wars Story is in cinemas May 25th! To have a chance of winning, just answer this question: which royal just got married? A prince harry B prince charles C prince william To have a chance of winning, just answer this question: what is lando’s surname? A kenobi B skywalker C calrissian answer answer ©Hasbro 2018. All rights reserved. © & TM Lucasfilm ltd a kindle fire! With the World Cup round the corner put your footy knowledge to the test with over 300 brain-busting questions in The Amazing Quiz Book! Read about the greatest goals, coolest coaches and worst keepers in footy history! One lucky reader will win all three Football School books and this 16 GB Kindle Fire HD 8 tablet with Alexa and 8 inch HD display! To have a chance of winning, just answer this question: in which city is crystal palace fc based? A belfast B london C birmingham answer HOW TO ENTER Email your answers along L I A M E Y with your name, date of B birth, parent or guardian’s name, address and telephone number to: email@example.com, with BEANO No. 3936 in the subject line. BY POST Send this page to: Beano Competitions No. 3936, DC Thomson, 2 Albert Square, Dundee DD1 9QJ Name: ................................................................................ Date of birth: ................................................................... Address: ........................................................................... ............................................................................................. ............................................................................................. Parent or Guardian’s name: ........................................ Phone No: ......................................................................... The winners will be chosen by the Beano Editor. The judge’s decision is final and no correspondence will be entered into. Closing dates for entries: June 6th 2018 11:59pm (GMT). Details of winners available on request. For our full competition T&Cs visit www.dctmedia.co.uk/brands/beano or send a large stamped address envelope to Beano Marketing, Copy of your Competition Terms, D.C. Thomson, 2 Albert Square, Dundee DD1 9QJ. DANGEROUS DAN i must see how dan is doing with our new hi-tech stealth kit. you can use it to disguise yourself as Beanotown’s TOP secret agent! my goodness! you’ve used it to turn yourself into a realistic looking desk! WORDS & ART: PAUL PALMER anything! …i’m actually over here, boss. er… i’m afraid i can’t disguise my disappointment! WORDS & ART: LEW STRINGER big eggo Will he ever find his egg? terry tuff is still trying to catch me and put me back in my cage! i’ll hide in the school, i won’t get locked up in there! are you the new boy? you’re late! detention! ? you’re not allowed to leave until you’ve finished your 100 so much for not getting lines! locked up! tricky dicky Beanotown’s TOP trickster! greetings, cubs! attention, cubs! a new patrol leader joins us today! cub scouts is a good laugh! WORDS: JD SAVAGE ART: LAURA HOWELL arrgh! it’s mr throbb! later… look, someone’s dropped a coin! don’t move or you won’t get your sitting still badge, dicky. i’ll get it! yikes! yes, and i’ve invented lots of new activity badges for you to earn! and do we get a badge for what do you think of our trapping and knot-tying skills, sir? pranking? fume! this is knot what i signed up for! 018 2 , Y A M H 28T Y A D N O M n! a spi r o f k n , y a r r Dear Dia creepy-crawly p pider man! s a I took my dad's not a y Let's sa 1 wed I borro lip. d n a Liam m’s hair c my mu 2 YOU’LL NEED: l An octopus claw hair clip We clipped it to my parents’ headboard. Sp-sp-sp-spider! 3 Then we sn uck out. 4 , my to bed n he t n e w whe rents my pa t of his skin der! n e h i W ou ed a sp mped dad ju ought he spi th my auntie claire would fall for this prank – she’s terrified of spiders! the kids are on a school trip… here we are… beanotown history museum! what a fascinating place. oh, look! a suit of armour! urrgh! if i’d wanted to see dusty, old relics i could have just visited the staff room! i’m one of the museum’s security guards. i heard you lot were coming so thought i’d better be prepared! gulp! cool! at least we’re not in school. there are original manuscripts by some of the world’s most famous authors through here! and… look at this! the original manuscript for charles dickens’ ‘great expectations!’ astonishing! ah… ha-ha! i don’t wanna learn! i’ve got some great expectations right now. what?! the dickens! don’t worry, miss! i’ll wipe it up with this old bit of paper! dare i ask where you found that, smiffy? WORDS: ANDY FANTON ART: DAVID SUTHERLAND expectations met! oops! i found it over there with a bunch of other old bits of paper! good! he’d be mad if i’d used his new one! smiffy! that’s shakespeare’s old manuscript! gah! quick! we’ve got to get out of here! now, children leave those alone! look! cannons! enemy vessel spotted, captain! fire at will! i’ll fire at teacher instead i don’t know anyone called will! that’s more like it! uh-oh! we’ll have a ball! wahoo! it’s just like the battle of water-loo! chortle! sigh... at least things can’t get any worse! waah! someone left a pile of dirty, great bones over there! hey, miss. this place is a mess! smiffy… what have you done?! oh no. arrgh! it’s collapsed! this way, kids - we need to leg it! who’s nicked the t-rex’s leg? so… grr! when i find whoever’s responsible, they’ll be for it! is this what they mean by night school? chuckle! shh! now is not the time for jokes! we’ll be history if he finds us! What do you call a cow with only two legs? Lean beef! DO YOU THINK-THEY-SAURUS?! The kids have made a few changes to the museum’s dinosaur display. Can you spot the twelve differences between these two security camera images? 23/05/18 REC: CAM 01 23/05/18 REC: CAM 01 Solution TICK ‘EM AS YOU FIND THEM! monday morning… i’m not sure i can be bothered to go to school today. wait! of course! i can go to school but not actually go to school! I AM RU-BI! I AM A HU-MAN! behold… robo rubi! all i need to do is create a not-me! HE-LLO! I AM RU-BI! WORDS: ANDY FANTON ART: EMILY McGORMAN-BRUCE blah, blah, blah, blah! i won’t have to sit through mrs creecher’s lessons! and i can use it to deal with anyone who annoys me! all from the comfort of my own bed! TAKE THAT! VE-RY IN-TER-ES-TING! why isn’t the robot moving? what’s happened? gah! maybe i should’ve used batteries instead of a power cable! Who tidies the seabed? Mer-maids i can control it through my touchscreen, and see whatever it sees! if there’s a bright centre to the universe, beanoworld is the farthest planet from it… on the surface, dodge solo is out for his morning jog… he’s being pursued by shock troopers… wait! that’s not the dodge i know! – ed thanks for nothing, fuzz ball! K! N I DO i had to dodge them by running! me – running! …arrgh! they’ve blown out a thruster! i think we’re out of range of their lasers… WORDS: WORDS: NIGEL NIGEL AUCHTERLOUNIE AUCHTERLOUNIE ART: ART: NIGEL NIGEL PARKINSON PARKINSON those guys were going to put me to work in the parp mines! we kinda need that! my lovely ship! uh-oh! i can’t keep her in the air much longer! that’s more like the dodge i know! – ed gnash?! gnash! start her up, buddy! no! my mum’s gonna kill me! in... I’VE GOT A BAD FEELING ABOUT DODGING THIS! this is all your fault! come on, gnash. we’ll have to think of a way to get that know a way, i do. million credits out of the swamp ourselves! how are we gonna lift the ship out of the swamp? in a way that doesn’t require back-breaking effort? saw that, i did. funny, it was. if you can’t help, get lost! so… for half a million! tell me more! LIE ! million, say you? how much to rent a sky crane? no way! 120 credits. my sky cranes are like my babies! i’d never let one out of my sight without… borrow your sky crane, i will. make up for that thing that time, it will. i’ll give you 200 after i use it. that thing that time was your fault! sorry! ow! K! N O D back to the swamp, buddy. if we take our time, she’ll have done all the work for us before we get there! thank me, do not! steal the million credits, i will! thanks! the ship takes off just as the shock troopers arrive… hey! we kinda need the ship to escape from the shock troopers! what million credits? the million on the… …oh. what you did there, i see. steal your ship instead, i will! but… ha-ha! hey! she never gave me a chance to tell her the thruster is out. jar jar minx, you are under arrest for giving our ship a nasty dent! hey, guys! arrgh! his dodge all along, it was! thanks for the new ship! hey! don’t steal that! stealing this ship wasn’t part of the original dodge, but i don’t have to tell her that! gnash gnash gnash? What is a werewolf’s favourite time of the year? The howl-o-days! don’t worry, gnash. there won’t be any shock troopers within 12 parsecs of us! i’ve got a bad feeling about this! – ed i like the sound that the answer makes - like a real werewolf! not pass me, you will! Help Dodge Solo escape the fleet of Shock Trooper spaceships and reach Beano World safely! you owe me 120 credits, solo! Solution don’t worry, gnash! you can count on me for a dodge out of this! Advertisement STAR WAR S PRIZES! * USE THE DODGES YOU MUST! , i’VE GOT A BAD FEELiNG ABOUT THiS! so al starring stated. dd unless otherwise d residents only, NZ $5.99 ions open to UK vary. Competit date — 30/0 5/2018 dddddd AUS $4.95, MINNI the minEx dddddd dennis & gnash er Cover gifts may calamity james UK Off-sale RY E V E T GE EFORE B COPY’S IN THE IT PS! SHO £2.75 26-May-18 ER SAVE OV ** £69 E SHOP OFF TH ICE! R P WOR TH £7.99! e e r f a PLUS2 pencil es tionery l b i d e incsre and sta pack! ca PACKAGE Direct Debit 1 year Pre-pay 6 month Pre-pay INCLUDES FREE GIFT! Save £69.50! FREE GIFT! Save £50.50! FREE GIFT! Save £21.26! TOTAL PRICE PRICE YOU PAY PER ISSUE £68 £1.36 £87 £1.74 £47.49 £1.90 BE DEASLT! How to sign up… Ask an adult to help Visit beano.com/subscribe Call 0800 318 846 n Freephone from UK landlines and mobiles (MON-FRI 8am-6pm, SAT 9am-5pm) S *Direct Debit offer. Pay only £17 per quarter (only £68 for the year). One year minimum term applies. UK bank accounts only. Savings based on yearly newsstand price of £137.50. One year prepay options also available at: £87 (UK) and £156.60 (Overseas). Overseas customers please call +441382 575580 or visit our website. While stocks last. A replacement will be offered if no longer available. In order to offer subscribers significant savings on the cover price cover gifts are not included in subscription copies and are newsstand promotions only! Closing date 6th June 2018. ** Save over £69 with this Direct Debit offer. ubscribin by phon g Quote ‘B e? N to claim INC’ yo free gif ur t! edd has to write a report on the battle of hastings for history homework… there’s a lot going on in edd’s head… in edd’s head… what are we going to write? did any of us listen in history? i’m not even listening to you now! our brave heroes look it up… urrgh! it’s words! who reads words?! the top bit says that it was a battle between england and the normans. we had a war against people called norman?! i know someone called norman. he was good at maths. we’ll look it up on the net! who else has england battled? everyone called gary? all the janets?! the ‘normans’ came from normandy, which is now a part of france! – ed WORDS & ART: NIGEL AUCHTERLOUNIE we should read the whole thing so we know. go on then, ready mcreader! no, you! later… no, you! done! england fought the normans because they wouldn’t stop rubbing how good at maths they were in our faces. we won because of our giant robots! i did the maths homework last week! i’m the boss! which means i don’t actually do anything! edd’s report was 100% wrong but he got a ‘c’ because mr throbb didn’t read it. my best score yet! robots? another historic battle. – ed actually, the normans won. – ed What happened when two guys stole a calendar? They both got six months! Advertorial i have to write a book report. even though i haven’t done anything! well, anything i’ve been caught for. i can’t read, but it smells great! Dennis a nd the Chambe is like a r of Mis normal chief book, bu t bette r! Usually my adventu eight m res last inutes, for abo u n ut til som caught, e thing b but thi reaks or s was m y bigge I get st one y Me, Gna et! sher an d Minni cool qu e went on est und this er Bean the Gol otown l den Pea ooking f shooter or of Everl We had a s t ing Fun to face . so many along t puzzles he way and cha with gr and dod llenges umpy ol ge-ball d s u i t p s of arm laying, and tha steam-p our t’s all b o e w fore Wa ered ro a Pre-H bots, lter cau istoric G sed hav nashers was a bu oc with aurus re nch of o x! There ther aw stuff t esome oo but It ’s so cra won’t b zy you elieve m e if it t ell you ! You sho uld rea d it! Did I me ntion t he pirat ghost? e There w as one of them too! It was m y bigge st adventu re yet! Subject to availability. Selected stores only. Book £3.50 THE WORLD’S WILDEST BOY... AND HIS BEST FRIEND! what’s up, guys? welcome to my new channel. hit like! and don’t forget to subscribe! today i’m, er… …urrgh! i should have thought of vlogging something is hard. before i started recording. that’s rubbish! you’ll never get me a million subscribers saying nothing! go on! speak! WORDS: NIGEL AUCHTERLOUNIE ART: NIGEL PARKINSON ta-da! i’m not in a box any more! what’s vlogging? ha-ha! don’t you know? let me record you saying it again. i’ll call it ‘know nothing dad’! this conversation is confusing and unsettling me! you were meant to say, ‘that’s me unboxed’. no-one will get the joke now! i’ll do an unboxing video instead! what’s unboxing? POP! dog videos are always internet gold! gnasher, be cute! okay, cute is a stretch for you. try complaining about something. i saw a video of a husky that didn’t want to go out for a walk that got four million views! how can cute be a stretch for me? i’m adorable! hello? i want to complain about the speed of my broadband… no! i meant howl at the door or something! i saw a different pie face – video where a husky give gnasher refused to have a a bath! bath that got a couple of million views. er… no. a bath?! urrgh! fails are always popular. i always face plant when i try a rail stand. let’s do that. rail stand? don’t film me portrait! it’ll make here me an internet i go! monster! huh?! i did it! i failed at failing! and recording… let me see! now! ha-ha! it’s got 23 views already! that’s because you’ve watched it 23 times! whoops! see? that would have been a million views right there! better – or should that be worse? – luck next time, dennis! – ed Did you hear about the ghost comedian? He was boo-ed off stage! d Dennis has startfierst vlogging and hisut his video is all abo es! favourite jok p my I had to give u raman... me career as a ca ocus! f …I kept losing What did the do on the com spider puter? He made a we b-site! How do S cottis make vid h vloggers eos? With an Aye Phon e! u What do yo's dog gger call the vlo gic tricks? a who does m brador! A labracada Why did the vlogger cross the web? To get to the other site! call an iPhone u o y o d t a h W around? g in k o j 't n is t a th s! Deadly Siri-ou My laptop is missing a ke y… …it looks like I lost ctrl! computer? a e s u s t n a h p Why can't ele f the mouse! o id a r f a o o t They're 1951 views 80 3 SHARE ... ADVERTISEMENT AS SEEN ON E R ’ Y THE … K C BA odes s i p e w e he n Watch t on CBBC now To play games, watch videos and find out more go to Beano.com/Dennis nom-nom-nom! whoa! what you doing, billy? ! IZZ WH i did it! i set a new record for eating breakfast - 27 seconds! i’m seeing how many personal records i can top! i’ve got to beat the clock! wow! MUNC H! whoa! a new record time for getting upstairs! i am on fire today! now to see if i can beat my record for brushing my teeth! grooo! raarrgh! M! O ZO yes! i did it! oh dear! gasp! puff! billy, you’re making a mess! now to race to school and... BANG! ...arrgh! i’ve slipped on a toy! H! S A CR ! SLIP WORDS: ANDY FANTON ART: WAYNE THOMPSON oofya! hee-hee! looks like my time is up! bah! Why did the mammoth cross the road? There were no chickens in the Ice Age! Time to spread my wings! Hi! I’m Serafina, but you guys can call me… You can be a Menace too! Email YOUR MENACE NAME to: MMAM@beano.com! How speedy am I? I’m Speedy Serafina! Far away… Let’s find out! ...GO! Ready… set… You’ve got to be careful crossing the road. Look left, look right, look left again. …directions! Let’s find a crossing! Urrgh! Mum! There’s nothing for miles in both… Serafina and Billy run fast enough not to sink into water… The sound barrier! We’re going faster than our voices! WORDS: NIGEL AUCHTERLOUNIE ART: HUNT EMERSON m ! ce a e me mena k a They’ll catch up! I guess the next thing is faster than light! Some think that if you go faster than light, you go back in time! Let’s see! …that’s three times faster than Usain Bolt! Faster than light! Serafina wins the race! Gasp! It’s hard to avoid things when you can only see them once you’ve passed them! WOOO! Once around the world! UH OH! LOOKS LIKE WE WENT SO FAST THAT WE WENT BACK TO WHERE THE REALLY OLD COMICS WERE SET! DON’T FORGET! Send us a brilliant photo of yourself with your Menace Name!