Latest recipe: How to slap a cop andgetawaywithitкод для вставки
18 I Humour - The People Sunday, October 13, 2013 Shenanigans . . "" Latest recipe: How to slap a cop and get away with it He demanded to talk to the officer commanding the station. We were not disappointed because the OCS was just at the counter talking to some officers. DJ Rama walked up to him and politely demanded to know if he was the OCS, the officer nodded and my friend slapped him veryhard on the cheek! Cerebral malaria SESE OJ , SOME years ago, long before the new Constitution sowed. sorxe changes, I was arrested by the police. We were with a DJ who had been acting erratic all afternoon .The police, of course, true to their character never bothered to tell us what wrong we had done to deserve their attention. The book of law is large, they said, thus they wouldn't miss something to pin on us. It was nine at night. When we reached the Centra l police station, my friend, who was laughing and giggling all the time suddenly turned dead serious and menacing. Dear reader, try to imagine what horror may come from such an act. The cops, the other victims of th e law and: were shocked beyond comprehension . DJ Rama had really gone overboard! The DJ Rama was about to lose his life or limb, ifhe was lucky.Three cops quickly recovered from the shock and pounced on Dl Rarna. They pinned h im to the ground and were about to maul him when the stung officerstopped thei r thras hing midway. Their jaws froze mid-air and a qu izzical looks took over the ir faces. I was sure the OCS wanted to avenge himselfby breaking Rarna's jaws but [was surprised when he put his fingers to the DJ's jugular and patiently to ld the junior officersto take the boy to hosp ital. That act is engraved in my m ind to date. It was an act of mercy and from a just person. This boy ha d slapped him hard and shamed him in his own "dungeon" whe re he cou ld have done anything to prove his power, but he reflected fast and empathised with the fool who slapped hi m. It turns out Rama was really sick. His eyes were b lazing with fever. He was taken to hospital by the po lice in those dark days of impunity courtesy of an officer he had assau lted! He was diagnosed with cerebral malaria and after severalweeks in hospital, Ramawas taken to the mental hospital. These days, at the corner of Casablanca, just next to the K-Rep Bank offMoi Avenue, a crazy heavily-bearded, dirty man lies in the midd le ofthe pavement, It is Rama. He finally lost all his mental abilities. He is now incurab le and his family gave up on him a long time ago. I have never seen that cop again and whether they transferred him somewhere else I know ~ot. AH I can say is that he was a good Three cops quickly recovered from the shock and pounced on DJ Ramo. They pinned him to the ground and were about to maul him when the stung officer stopped their thrashing midway. Their jaws froze mid-air and a quizzical look took over their faces. I man. That is a different case from what Babu did. Everyone called him Babu, but as far as I know, he was never married and had no children ofhis own . He was a likeab le old man, tall, imposing and was always dressed in neat Kaunda suits which were all milk wh ite. Babu was a bhang smoker though and all вЂў in Kongowea knew that. He smoked Rooster cigarettes and always bought a packet which he placed elegantly in his breast pockets wh ile driving his Volkswagen beetle. Rooster cigarettes One day Babu was stopped by the po lice. He got out of the car wea ring a mean face. There were many officers around but Babu wanted to know who among them was in charge. As soon as he was shown the inspector, he called the man . Now the inspector mus t have been surprised by the calm demeanour of this Kaunda suit clad man. He moved close to -Babu and the tall man asked him who he was. The inspector introduced himse lf and Babu gave him a slap that sounded like the crack of a whip. It elicited a fart from the astounded officer. Babu said to him: "Kama wewe ni inspekta, hata mimi pia ni inspekta!" He paused with gravity and added : IIWa munispaa! If The astonishment in the cops faces immediately metamorphosed into anger and Babu was th rown into the boot of the police car and taken with haste to the station where he was rolled violently into the cells. They d id not remov; his shoes or belt as is the norm. When news of his arrest reached Kongowea, a few respectable old people went to see how they could bail Babu out. The charges against him were very thick but the officer allowed Babu out of the cells to talk with his people. Ashe explained himself to the elders, he took out his Rooster cigarettes and lit one. It turned out to be one of his sticks of marijuana that he usually camouflaged as cigarettes . He lit it in the police station right in front of the officer he had previously slapped! What happened to Babu next is another story. вЂў .'